流浪者：一部关于安东尼·波登的电影 Roadrunner: A Film About Anthony Bourdain(2021)(EN)Subtitles

SRT Subtitles download

Color: Size:1416 18202224 26283040 LightfaceBold StandardItalic

ASS Custom style subtitle

Subtitle Preview：
1 00:00:27 [Anthony Bourdain] It is considered useful
2 00:00:29 and enlightening and therapeutic
3 00:00:31 to think about deathfor a few minutes a day.
4 00:00:36 What actually happensto my physical remains
5 00:00:40 is of zero interest to me.
6 00:00:44 I don't want anybody seeing my body,I don't want anybody--
7 00:00:47 I don't want a party.
8 00:00:48 "Reported dead."
9 00:00:51 Unless it could provideentertainment value to--
10 00:00:54 I mean, in a perverseor subversive way, you know.
11 00:00:57 I mean, if you could throw meinto a wood chipper and punt--
12 00:01:00 you know, spray me into Harrods,
13 00:01:02 you know, at, uh, middle of the rush hour,
14 00:01:07 that would be pretty epic.
15 00:01:08 I wouldn't mind beingremembered in that way.
16 00:01:10 One, two, three, four, five, six
17 00:01:14 Roadrunner, roadrunner
18 00:01:17 Going faster miles an hour
19 00:01:20 Gonna drive past the Stop & Shop
20 00:01:23 With the radio on
21 00:01:27 I'm in love with Massachusetts
22 00:01:30 And the neon when it's cold outside
23 00:01:33 And the highwayWhen it's late at night
24 00:01:36 Got the radio on
25 00:01:39 I'm like the roadrunner…
26 00:01:40 [Bourdain] What the fuck am I doing here?
27 00:01:43 I shall explain.
28 00:01:46 One minute I was standingnext to a deep fryer,
29 00:01:49 and the next, I was watchingthe sun set over the Sahara.
30 00:01:53 [camel grunts]
31 00:01:56 I realized that one thingled directly to the other.
32 00:01:59 Had I not takena dead-end dish-washing job,
33 00:02:02 I would not have become a cook.
34 00:02:04 Had I not become a cook,I would never have become a chef.
35 00:02:09 Had I not become a chef,
36 00:02:10 I never would've been ableto fuck up so spectacularly.
37 00:02:15 Had I not known whatit was like to really fuck up,
38 00:02:18 that obnoxious but wildlysuccessful memoir I wrote
39 00:02:22 wouldn't have been half as interesting.
40 00:02:23 And I say roadrunner onceRoadrunner twice
41 00:02:27 I'm in love with rock 'n' rollAnd I'll be out all night
42 00:02:30 Roadrunner, that's right…
43 00:02:32 And I'm not gonna tell you herehow to live your life.
44 00:02:36 I'm just saying, I guess,that I got very lucky.
45 00:02:39 - Radio on- I got the AM
46 00:02:42 - Radio on- Got the car, got the AM
47 00:02:45 - Radio on- Got the AM sound, got the
48 00:02:49 - Radio on- Got the rockin' modern neon sound
49 00:02:51 Radio on
50 00:02:53 I Got the car from MassachusettsGot the
51 00:02:56 I got the power of MassachusettsWhen it's late at night
52 00:02:59 All right, bye-bye
53 00:03:07 [Bourdain] You're probably gonnafind out about it anyway,
54 00:03:09 so here's a littlepreemptive truth telling.
55 00:03:11 There's no happy ending.
56 00:03:13 [man] He committed suicide,the fucking asshole.
57 00:03:16 How are you gonna make this?Is this gonna-- I mean--
58 00:03:19 Of course, what you want to talk about,
59 00:03:20 that's kind of where the gossip goes,that's kind of--
60 00:03:22 But it's not really what you want to make.
61 00:03:25 [Neville] No, I want to make a film aboutwhy he was… who he was.
62 00:03:30 You know?
63 00:03:31 I don't know. That's why I'm here.
64 00:03:34 Do you know what I mean?That's why I'm here.
65 00:03:42 Hi. This is Tony at Les Halles,411 Park Avenue South,
66 00:03:45 for delivery Monday, please.
67 00:03:47 I need one Spanish onion,one loose carrot,
68 00:03:50 two shallot, unpeeled,
69 00:03:52 one case frozen fava beanand one case miel de Provence.
70 00:03:56 That'll do it. Thank you.
71 00:04:03 Where is my fucking fish?
72 00:04:06 I would never be late.
73 00:04:08 My cooks would never be late.
74 00:04:11 How can the fish guy be late?
75 00:04:13 It's why all chefs are drunks.
76 00:04:15 It's because we don't understand whythe world doesn't work like our kitchens.
77 00:04:28 -Oh, hold on.-[woman] If you guys are hun--
78 00:04:30 It's just baba ghanoush. It's--
79 00:04:31 I mean, it's not a very nice display,
80 00:04:33 -I know Tony.-Cool.
81 00:04:34 [Bourdain] Thanks, baby.
82 00:04:35 -What would you like?-[Bourdain] Um…
83 00:04:38 -apple juice?-Apple juice? Apple juice?
84 00:04:40 Or cranberry. I don't care.Whatever we have more of.
85 00:04:46 Happiness is a fresh pack.
86 00:04:50 First thing in the morning.
87 00:04:51 I mean, before I brush my teeth.
88 00:04:53 I mean, I roll out of bed,light a cigarette,
89 00:04:55 stumble into this room, and I start, uh--I start writing immediately.
90 00:05:02 I always use languageto get out of trouble.
91 00:05:06 You know, I found at an early age,
92 00:05:08 if I made everybody in the class laugh,that was power.
93 00:05:12 I came from a householdwith a lot of books.
94 00:05:15 In fact, the first book I remember readingwas a book called Why Johnny Can't Read,
95 00:05:19 which I stole from my mother.
96 00:05:21 She was anticipatingthat I would have difficulty reading
97 00:05:24 because I was already exhibitingantisocial tendencies.
98 00:05:27 I pinched the book and, uh,basically taught myself to read,
99 00:05:31 uh, by kindergarten.
100 00:05:33 And then, you know, my early heroeswere, uh, musicians and writers.
101 00:05:40 The idea that you could have adventures,no matter how antisocial,
102 00:05:43 and then make them somehow legitimateby writing something beautiful about them,
103 00:05:47 that concept took an early hold on me.
104 00:05:52 I wasn't serious enough about anythingto actually do any writing until '93.
105 00:05:57 But, you know, when I was giventhe opportunity, I did it,
106 00:05:59 and, you know, kept doing it.
107 00:06:02 The whole businessfills me with terror, frankly.
108 00:06:14 [whistling]
109 00:06:21 Hey.
110 00:06:25 How are you doing, man?
111 00:06:28 -You guys know each other by now.-Yes.
112 00:06:30 [man] Let me see if Rocco's over.
113 00:06:34 [Neville] What was it about Tonywith big knives?
114 00:06:36 [laughs]
115 00:06:37 They were never sharp enough.
116 00:06:39 You know, he's-- he'd just always--
117 00:06:41 When he came over for Thanksgiving, uh,
118 00:06:43 I was gonna carve the turkey,and then he took over.
119 00:06:46 He was very short with me abouthow I wasn't taking care of my knives.
120 00:06:50 -Hey.-Tony saw you when you were just born.
121 00:06:53 Remember that?
122 00:06:56 My relationship with Tonyhas always been as a writer.
123 00:07:00 He was such a powerful writerright from the start.
124 00:07:05 He was on business in Tokyofor the first time.
125 00:07:08 And he was writing me a series of emails.
126 00:07:12 He was back in his room,and he did one of those bursts.
127 00:07:17 [typing]
128 00:07:18 [Bourdain] "The jet lagwouldn't let me sleep,
129 00:07:20 so I crashed late and rose early,
130 00:07:22 plunging blindly down dark streetsat all hours.
131 00:07:25 The streets were unbelievably densewith pedestrians,
132 00:07:28 people hanging around, flashing neon,
133 00:07:30 flapping banners, more screaming signs,
134 00:07:32 pimpy-looking young menin suits and patent leather shoes
135 00:07:36 surrounded by dye-blonde Asian womenin thigh-high boots and micro-miniskirts.
136 00:07:40 No one, and I mean no one,would meet my eye with a direct gaze.
137 00:07:46 I was the quiet American,the ugly American, the hungry ghost,
138 00:07:49 searching and searchingfor whatever came next."
139 00:07:55 I loved it. I loved it,
140 00:07:57 and my wife Karen,who was a book publisher,
141 00:08:01 was in the living roombreastfeeding the baby.
142 00:08:05 I printed out the email
143 00:08:07 and I went,"Karen, you have to read this."
144 00:08:10 Am I allowed to curse?
145 00:08:12 Does anybody curse when they talk on this?
146 00:08:15 I read it and I just went,"That is fucking awesome."
147 00:08:19 I was like, "Okay,I'm gonna make him an offer
148 00:08:22 basically he can't fucking refuse."[laughs]
149 00:08:26 He came back and then we sat down.
150 00:08:28 I said, "So, Joel tells me,you know, you have a lot of stories."
151 00:08:31 And he goes, "I have so many stories.I'm so excited to tell them."
152 00:08:34 He said, "I already have a title for it."
153 00:08:36 I said, "What's the title?"And he said, "Kitchen Confidential."
154 00:08:38 And I said, "I love it. Let's do it."
155 00:08:40 [woman] What do you thinkabout Tony Bourdain anyway?
156 00:08:42 [Rinaldi] Yeah, what do you thinkabout that guy? He's cool, huh?
157 00:08:45 -[crying]-[all laughing]
158 00:08:51 It was like, "Will you write this book?"
159 00:08:53 "Yes." "Can you write it in eight months?"
160 00:08:56 "You're damn right I will."
161 00:08:57 You know, you should talkto Tony's agent, Kim Witherspoon.
162 00:09:02 [Witherspoon] I don't thinkTony was afraid of failure,
163 00:09:04 and that was hard-wired.
164 00:09:06 He was the kind of person who thought,
165 00:09:08 "Well, you know, what the fuck?
166 00:09:09 Let's just try itand see how it turns out."
167 00:09:11 [male anchor] Anthony Bourdain,who has worked as a chef for 28 years,
168 00:09:14 reveals some surprisingand disturbing trade secrets
169 00:09:17 in a new book called Kitchen Confidential.
170 00:09:19 Chef Anthony says the truthabout bread in a restaurant,
171 00:09:22 how you should prepare your meatwhen you order it,
172 00:09:24 and also the truth about fish,could make you sick.
173 00:09:28 I was in a cranky moodafter my last restaurant closed
174 00:09:30 and, uh, felt no reasonnot to tell the truth
175 00:09:34 about a business I both loveand, uh, have mixed emotions about.
176 00:09:38 [Witherspoon ]Kitchen Confidential is a memoir
177 00:09:41 of Tony's life in the kitchenand the salty adventures
178 00:09:44 that he had with his cooks.
179 00:09:46 It was kind of lawless.
180 00:09:48 You know, a lot was broken,as Tony used to say.
181 00:09:52 [man] Mr. Bourdain isthe executive chef at Les Halles.
182 00:09:55 He found success and a full-blownheroin habit at an early age.
183 00:10:00 [Bourdain] I had a dope problem,a cocaine problem,
184 00:10:03 but by '88, I pretty muchcleaned up my act.
185 00:10:09 The dietary supplementthat every chef needs.
186 00:10:11 I take around ten of these a day.
187 00:10:13 It's an aspirin/Tylenol mix.
188 00:10:20 We call 'em crunchies.
189 00:10:22 Let me take you on a notional joyridethrough our menu tonight.
190 00:10:25 We have grilled salmon with sorrel sauce.
191 00:10:28 Veal kidneys.
192 00:10:30 These kidneys are really good, by the way.
193 00:10:31 Those of you into water sportswill find much to love.
194 00:10:35 [Rinaldi] From the first time I met him,I remember thinking,
195 00:10:37 "Oh, wow, you're, like, talland handsome and funny.
196 00:10:40 But you're kind of a big nerd.
197 00:10:42 You're nerding out on everything,and you're a little awkward."
198 00:10:45 And I love that about him.
199 00:10:49 [Bourdain] "At Les Halles,life goes on as always,
200 00:10:52 the same crew showing upon time every day."
201 00:10:54 -[Bourdain] ¿Cuanto más?-"Eddy, Carlos and Omar,
202 00:10:57 Isidoro and Angel.
203 00:10:58 They're still with me,and I hope they stay with me.
204 00:11:01 My bosses, however, when they read this,
205 00:11:03 will really prove themselvespatrons of the arts
206 00:11:05 if they don't can me right away."
207 00:11:07 [slurping]
208 00:11:09 -[Neville] So you didn't fire him?-I didn't fire him.
209 00:11:11 I didn't know it was being written.
210 00:11:13 I didn't knowit was going to be published.
211 00:11:15 One day, I arrived at the restaurant,and I just said, "What happened?"
212 00:11:20 You're fucking kidding me.
213 00:11:23 I was told today that on,I guess, the 12th of this month,
214 00:11:27 it'll be number sevenon the Times best seller list.
215 00:11:30 [man] 'Cause it was on 20, wasn't it?And then, uh…
216 00:11:32 I mean, I'm getting congratulatory calls,
217 00:11:34 and they're telling meI have a best seller.
218 00:11:37 Uh, really, it's scary.
219 00:11:38 No, it's exciting. It's wonderful.
220 00:11:40 -Yeah, I just---Yes, it's good.
221 00:11:43 Anything that happens beyond that door,I'm suspicious of.
222 00:11:46 [laughs]
223 00:11:48 [Lajaunie] He was alwaysbehind in the rent,
224 00:11:50 always behind his, you know, payments
225 00:11:53 and-- and livingfrom paycheck to paycheck,
226 00:11:56 like in a pressure cooker.
227 00:11:58 So when there was this opportunity,he was ready.
228 00:12:08 [Bourdain] By the time I was 43,
229 00:12:10 I really thought that I hadhad all my great adventures,
230 00:12:12 that the entertainment and excitementsegment of the program was long over.
231 00:12:20 -[man] Good luck.-Thank you.
232 00:12:24 That was cool.
233 00:12:26 I was comfortably ensconced in secure digs
234 00:12:28 with a wife who still remarkablyfound me to be amusing on occasion.
235 00:12:31 What? What are you doing?You're giving interviews?
236 00:12:34 What are you-- You media ho.
237 00:12:35 I had a job I lovedin a successful restaurant,
238 00:12:37 and I was alive, for Christ's sakes.I was still around.
239 00:12:44 I don't cook at home.
240 00:12:46 I just-- I'm too, uh--I would love to tell you,
241 00:12:48 you know, I go home and cookfabulous, uh, little snackies for my wife.
242 00:12:52 I would be lying if I told you that.
243 00:12:55 It's more like,"Honey, call out for Chinese."
244 00:12:57 [laughter]
245 00:13:01 "There are, it turns out, a million waysto say, 'Suck my dick.'
246 00:13:05 And like all great performances,
247 00:13:06 it's about timing, tone and delivery,
248 00:13:09 kind of like cooking."
249 00:13:10 Thanks.
250 00:13:11 [applause]
251 00:13:15 You know, all the TV chefsare so cuddly and adorable.
252 00:13:18 Maybe I'm sort of likethe antidote or something.
253 00:13:20 You know? I don't know.
254 00:13:27 For me, it happened overnight.
255 00:13:29 I mean, one minute,I was a cook at a restaurant,
256 00:13:31 and not a particularly great one,and the next,
257 00:13:33 I was an author,and it was literally overnight.
258 00:13:36 It fell in my lap.
259 00:13:51 [laughs]
260 00:13:53 [woman] Joining me nowis Anthony Bourdain,
261 00:13:55 author of Kitchen Confidential.
262 00:13:57 [man] Anthony Bourdain…
263 00:13:58 Chef Anthony Bourdain…
264 00:13:59 Here's Anthony Bourdain.
265 00:14:00 [cheers, applause]
266 00:14:02 [Letterman] What do you thinkabout these guys like Emeril Lagasse
267 00:14:05 and those guys on the Food Network?
268 00:14:06 Wow. You're asking me to kick Santa Clausin the crotch on television.
269 00:14:10 -I mean…-[laughter]
270 00:14:13 My life gets more and more ridiculous.
271 00:14:14 Apparently, Brad Pitt will beplaying me in a movie.
272 00:14:16 Yeah, guess what's, uh, tomorrow.
273 00:14:18 -[man] What's tomorrow?-Oprah.
274 00:14:20 No! You're kidding me!
275 00:14:22 This is Anthony Bourdain.
276 00:14:24 His book Kitchen Confidentialis a New York Times best seller.
277 00:14:28 [Cooper] I was born to cook.I loved satisfying people's appetites.
278 00:14:33 Next, I'll be, uh, doingthe lambada with Emeril.
279 00:14:35 Bam! Just a little…
280 00:14:39 I'd hate myself.
281 00:14:40 [laughter]
282 00:15:03 [chattering]
283 00:15:07 Thanks.
284 00:15:13 [man] Oh! Whoa!
285 00:15:16 Tony Bourdain rocks!
286 00:15:18 What's up, man? Everything good?
287 00:15:21 -Life is good.-Yes, yes.
288 00:15:22 We're celebrating Tony's book.
289 00:15:23 -Come here, girl. Get in here.-[woman] Hi.
290 00:15:25 -How you doing?-Good.
291 00:15:26 -This is Tony.-Hi.
292 00:15:28 -Howdy.-Oh, congratulations.
293 00:15:29 We're having a good time.
294 00:15:30 [Bourdain] Oh, the next one?
295 00:15:32 No, the next one,I'm doing something called A Cook's Tour.
296 00:15:34 Basically, I'm gonnatravel around the world,
297 00:15:36 eating exotic food and havingadventures in the Far East
298 00:15:39 and Africa and South America
299 00:15:42 with a crew chasing me.
300 00:15:43 [Westmoreland] Hey, John, come here.
301 00:15:48 [Bourdain] You know,my 15 minutes of "fame,"
302 00:15:51 uh, you know, when that's over,
303 00:15:53 I will be perfectly comfortable with that,if not relieved.
304 00:15:57 I think even relieved at this point.
305 00:15:59 [woman] When I met him for the first time,
306 00:16:02 he had made a splashwith Kitchen Confidential.
307 00:16:06 I had read that he had a contract
308 00:16:09 to write a second bookcalled A Cook's Tour,
309 00:16:11 and I called him.
310 00:16:13 -[cell phone rings]-Yes?
311 00:16:15 [Tenaglia] And I said,"Hey, I'm a producer."
312 00:16:17 Doing good.
313 00:16:18 [Tenaglia] "Would you ever even considermaking Cook's Tour into a series?"
314 00:16:22 And he was like, you know,"Yeah, uh, whatever."
315 00:16:25 -You know? "Sure."-Sure.
316 00:16:27 [Tenaglia] He was very nonplussedabout the whole idea
317 00:16:30 of doing anything in television.
318 00:16:32 It was not what was on his mind.
319 00:16:34 Bye-bye.
320 00:16:38 A week and a half later,Chris Collins and I
321 00:16:42 went up to Les Halles.
322 00:16:44 [Collins] We found Tony,shot a demo with him
323 00:16:48 and had a conversation with him.
324 00:16:50 And it became immediately clearhe had never traveled.
325 00:16:54 Lydia and I were far greaterworld travelers than Tony Bourdain.
326 00:16:59 His travels were in his head.
327 00:17:01 [Bourdain] You know, I want to goto faraway exotic places with palm trees
328 00:17:04 and where teenagers in army uniformscarry machine guns.
329 00:17:09 Growing up as a kid, you know,I watched The Crimson Pirate.
330 00:17:13 You know, all pirates and bad guyshaving great adventures.
331 00:17:23 [Tenaglia] Tony's view of the worldemanated from books and from films.
332 00:17:29 Almost in an encyclopedic way,
333 00:17:32 he could grab all these references.
334 00:17:35 And I think he was excitedto go on this journey
335 00:17:39 to see if the realityactually matched the imagination.
336 00:17:55 [Collins] That moment when we set out
337 00:17:57 in December of 2000, it's indelible.
338 00:18:02 Our first journey was, um, for six weeks.
339 00:18:05 And remember, we'd only spent one--
340 00:18:09 one day with Tonyleading up to that moment.
341 00:18:17 The image of Tony, it was, I think,
342 00:18:20 a guy who, at that moment, was very unsure
343 00:18:22 of what was about to happen.
344 00:18:25 This way.
345 00:18:27 [Bourdain] You know, I'm looking ata strange and, uh, unpredictable future
346 00:18:31 in a tough business
347 00:18:32 with rules that I'm notcompletely familiar with,
348 00:18:35 and when I become familiar with them, I--
349 00:18:38 you know, I don't knowwhether I like them that much.
350 00:18:43 [Tenaglia] We hit the road together,just the three of us.
351 00:18:48 [Collins] Lydia and Ihad just gotten married.
352 00:18:51 [yawns]
353 00:18:52 And then we had Tony,a guy who we barely knew.
354 00:18:56 So it was like three idiotstrying to figure each other out.
355 00:19:02 [Tenaglia] The first shoot was Japan.
356 00:19:03 Like, we didn't know what we were doing.
357 00:19:05 He definitely didn't knowwhat he was doing.
358 00:19:07 And Tony immediately becameuncomfortable and awkward.
359 00:19:15 [Collins] What we would find outvery quickly is,
360 00:19:17 Tony was actually a very shy human being.
361 00:19:20 And to get him to makeeye contact or to interact,
362 00:19:25 it wasn't his natural state.
363 00:19:33 [laughing] You know,life on the road with Tony Bourdain
364 00:19:36 just isn't all it's cracked up to be.You know what I mean?
365 00:19:40 The man can be a royal painin the ass sometimes.
366 00:19:44 In fact, I got this cold soreon my lip now,
367 00:19:48 and it's due to stress,
368 00:19:51 stress over Tony's lack of communication.
369 00:19:58 That, compounded by the factthat we were in Japan
370 00:20:00 being sort of led into scenes
371 00:20:02 where there was a lot ofkind of formality involved,
372 00:20:06 you know, all of those factoredinto him being quiet,
373 00:20:11 which was like the worst possible thing.
374 00:20:16 [Bourdain] Mmm. Oh, wow.
375 00:20:19 Spectacular.
376 00:20:21 I mean, Chris and I went back to the hotel
377 00:20:24 and basically lookedat each other and said, like…
378 00:20:26 We're fucked.
379 00:20:33 [Bourdain] Chris, can--Chris, take a picture of me and Lydia
380 00:20:36 as we come back with the sun behind her,
381 00:20:38 pointing up the mountaintowards the farmhouse
382 00:20:41 as we walk up pastthe yellow triangular sign.
383 00:20:44 Thank you.
384 00:20:46 Okay. Here we go.
385 00:20:48 Okay.
386 00:20:50 To be honest, I'm not totally alone,'cause clearly somebody is shooting this.
387 00:20:53 I always love those, like, desert scenes--
388 00:20:55 "I'm alone in the desert."
389 00:20:57 Yeah, but who else's footprints are those?
390 00:20:58 You know, one of those things. But look.
391 00:21:01 This is pretty cool.
392 00:21:05 And it does feel pretty coolto be walking--
393 00:21:07 Well, I'll tell you this:I'm having a lot more fun walking forward
394 00:21:10 than the cameraperson iswalking backwards, I'm sure.
395 00:21:13 [Collins groans]
396 00:21:15 -[laughs] Was that a groan?-[Tenaglia] Yes, it was.
397 00:21:18 We went from Japan to Vietnam.
398 00:21:21 [laughing, chattering]
399 00:21:25 That's when things startedto kick in to a different gear.
400 00:21:32 [horns honking]
401 00:21:34 My good friend Philippe Lajaunie,
402 00:21:36 uh, pulled in semi-unexpectedlylast night.
403 00:21:39 We're ready for, uh--ready for our adventure?
404 00:21:45 [Lajaunie] I joined themon that first trip in Vietnam,
405 00:21:47 and he was enjoying himselfand being less cynical.
406 00:21:52 Hey. Floating Starbucks over here.
407 00:21:54 I'll have a double latte,uh, mochaccino, please.
408 00:21:59 Oh, that's great.
409 00:22:00 Kicks the shit out of Starbucks.
410 00:22:05 [Bourdain] I love Vietnam.
411 00:22:07 Maybe it's a pheromonic thing,
412 00:22:09 like when you meetthe love of your life for the first time.
413 00:22:12 She just somehowinexplicably smells and feels right.
414 00:22:18 You sense that, given the opportunity,
415 00:22:19 this is the woman you want to spendthe rest of your life with.
416 00:22:24 [Lajaunie] We had common desire
417 00:22:26 to spend time in Vietnam, maybe forever.
418 00:22:29 That was our secret bond.
419 00:22:33 And of course, the movie Apocalypse Now
420 00:22:36 was one of his topthree movies in his life,
421 00:22:40 uh, because it combined so many things:
422 00:22:42 Vietnam and the war and the book,the Heart of Darkness.
423 00:22:46 [Bourdain] We just started doing allof these self-indulgent film references,
424 00:22:50 and I suddenly realized, "Wait a minute.
425 00:22:52 This-- This filmmaking thing can be fun."
426 00:22:55 Aah!
427 00:22:59 You know, it's a big crayon box.We can actually enjoy this.
428 00:23:02 Why am I here? Am I insane?
429 00:23:07 [Rinaldi] You know, he used to say,"Don't ever let me do TV.
430 00:23:10 Thing is, like, if I ever do TV,shoot me." [chuckles]
431 00:23:14 And, you know, at first, it was awful.
432 00:23:17 Where do cooks come from?
433 00:23:18 The answer to thisand other questions to follow.
434 00:23:21 And then very quickly--
435 00:23:23 he's such a good student,he's so freaking smart--
436 00:23:25 he, like, figured it out.
437 00:23:27 Chris, Lydia, I love you.You know that, right?
438 00:23:30 But I got one night in Bangkok here, okay?
439 00:23:32 So not even 24 hours,we're laying over here.
440 00:23:35 You want to do a wholegoddamn show in 24 hours?
441 00:23:37 Fine. Okay?
442 00:23:39 But… forget about blocking out.
443 00:23:41 No plan and you better be fast.
444 00:23:44 I'm gonna have a good time.We're gonna roll.
445 00:23:48 And if you don't get it, you don't get it.
446 00:23:50 Catch it in editing, as we like to say.
447 00:23:55 [Collins] What started to growat that moment was this understanding:
448 00:23:59 "Tony, you don't needto tell us everything.
449 00:24:01 You need to experience thisand ask questions.
450 00:24:03 That's how we're allgonna learn from this place.
451 00:24:05 It's not you being a travel guide.
452 00:24:08 It's you being open to this experience."
453 00:24:12 [Bourdain] Oh, Jesus. Look at this.
454 00:24:14 Look at this thing. Look at the roejust popping out everywhere.
455 00:24:17 Just in-- Whoa! Whoa.Come back. Come to papa.
456 00:24:20 If there is any dishthat comes closest to perfection,
457 00:24:23 this is it, you know.
458 00:24:25 This is bumping up right upagainst the walls of heaven.
459 00:24:30 Ah, man.
460 00:24:32 We've reached the mountaintop.
461 00:24:35 [dramatic music swelling]
462 00:24:51 [music stops]
463 00:25:05 [Bourdain] And trying to think,you know, "What do I want?"
464 00:25:08 It would be nice to buy something thatwill fulfill some hollow part of my soul,
465 00:25:12 but I can't think of, you know, anything.
466 00:25:14 Maybe a car will do it. I don't know.
467 00:25:19 I mean, shit, my rent is paid.That alone is spectacular.
468 00:25:25 I mean, I-- I--I'd like to live like a normal person.
469 00:25:28 That was always my thought,that if I get enough money,
470 00:25:31 I'll be able to live like a normal person.
471 00:25:34 But I don't even knowwhat that is anymore.
472 00:25:36 [cell phone rings]
473 00:25:39 I read Kitchen Confidential at that time,
474 00:25:41 and I call him.
475 00:25:43 And I invite him to have lunch with me
476 00:25:46 because I want to meet the man.
477 00:25:49 And he shows up with a TV crew.
478 00:25:52 [laughs]
479 00:25:54 [Bourdain] I thought this was a jackpot.
480 00:25:57 This was one of my idols.
481 00:25:58 I was just absolutely freaked out.
482 00:26:03 Incredibly sophisticated, refined,
483 00:26:05 clean, beautiful,
484 00:26:08 impeccably presented.
485 00:26:10 Eric's food is like the craftperformed at its highest level.
486 00:26:18 [Ripert] When I meet him,I don't expect him…
487 00:26:22 to be so articulate.
488 00:26:24 And he has amazinggood manners at the table.
489 00:26:29 And I think at the end of the meal,we said we should meet again.
490 00:26:33 And, um-- And we did.
491 00:26:45 Served with foie gras mousse.
492 00:26:47 [laughter]
493 00:26:52 [Ripert] I think what was not a struggle--
494 00:26:54 I don't know if "struggle"is the right word,
495 00:26:56 but the challenge was to be real,
496 00:26:58 stay real, and at the same time,
497 00:27:00 be the host of a TV show.
498 00:27:03 You have to exaggerate a little bit.
499 00:27:06 This is like driving a Rolls-Royce nakedin mink underpants.
500 00:27:13 Just so over-the-top luxurious.
501 00:27:17 [Tenaglia] I think the personthat people experienced on camera
502 00:27:21 was someone who seemingly hadthis incredible ability
503 00:27:23 to engage with anybody he came across.
504 00:27:26 It's like the un-muscled James Bond
505 00:27:28 who could kind of swan into scenes.
506 00:27:31 There was that personathat was created over time.
507 00:27:34 [Bourdain] I am looking for extremesof emotion and experience.
508 00:27:39 I'll try anything. I'll risk everything.
509 00:27:41 I have nothing to lose.
510 00:27:44 The story was A Cook's Tourwas about a guy who smoke and drank
511 00:27:47 and ate his way around the world.That was true.
512 00:27:50 Part of the pitch was,
513 00:27:52 "And he's gonna eatreally weird shit, too."
514 00:27:54 -[hisses]-Let's-- Let's do the nasty.
515 00:27:58 They don't seem to havetheir mise en place together.
516 00:28:00 I have my mise en place togetherwhen I'm making steak frites.
517 00:28:03 It seems to me, you know,when you're making live cobra,
518 00:28:05 you should haveyour operating stuff laid out.
519 00:28:07 You know, where'sthe cutting board, the knife?
520 00:28:10 Scissors?
521 00:28:12 [Collins] You know, eating thosekind of things was for camera,
522 00:28:14 was for network, was forall the reasons people do that.
523 00:28:17 It's like, you know--It was a little salacious,
524 00:28:20 like he's eatinga live, beating cobra heart.
525 00:28:24 Cheers, folks.
526 00:28:29 I feel strong.
527 00:28:30 It kind of pumps on its way down, too.
528 00:28:32 [Collins] And I think that personafollowed him for a number of years,
529 00:28:35 but over time,that burned off and it became Tony.
530 00:28:51 [Bourdain]Going back to the ancestral homeland,
531 00:28:53 and maybe we'll discoversome things along the way.
532 00:28:55 So, this is my fatherand a little friend in France,
533 00:28:59 in a little oyster village in the Gironde.
534 00:29:01 This is one of my favorite pictures also.
535 00:29:03 Uh, my brother and I in the same spot.
536 00:29:08 [Chris] We didn't do a lot of travelwhen we were kids
537 00:29:11 'cause my parents were not rich.
538 00:29:13 We did go to France a couple of timesbecause my dad had relatives there.
539 00:29:19 I'm nervous.
540 00:29:21 Whoever thoughtwe'd do something this goofy?
541 00:29:23 This isn't goofy.
542 00:29:25 [Chris] Our childhood as American kids,
543 00:29:27 we really got into Tintin books,which Americans say "Tin-Tin."
544 00:29:32 This was a graphic novelabout this young reporter
545 00:29:35 who travels all around the world
546 00:29:37 and ends up with allof these amazing adventures.
547 00:29:42 I think it was actually, in some ways,an inspiration for Tony's life.
548 00:29:45 [Bourdain] This is an oyster boat similarto the one on which I had my first oyster.
549 00:29:49 I blame my first oysterfor everything I did after:
550 00:29:52 my thrill-seeking,
551 00:29:53 all my hideous screw-upsin pursuit of pleasure.
552 00:29:58 I was miserable and angry.
553 00:30:01 Damn! We didn't get thosewhen we were kids.
554 00:30:03 -No, no.-Hee-hee!
555 00:30:04 I bridled bitterly atthe smothering choke hold
556 00:30:07 of love and normalcy in my house.
557 00:30:09 Call it a character flaw, of which drugswere simply a manifestation.
558 00:30:13 -Outstanding, Corporal!-Most excellent.
559 00:30:15 [Bourdain] A petulant "fuck you"to my bourgeois parents,
560 00:30:18 who'd committed the unpardonable sinof loving me.
561 00:30:23 -I'm glad we got a chance to do this.-Me, too.
562 00:30:27 [Bourdain]We're older and more mature now.
563 00:30:35 [Bourdain speaks French]
564 00:30:36 -Yeah?-[Tenaglia] Okay.
565 00:30:38 -[Bourdain speaking French]-Yeah, let's do another one.
566 00:30:40 -Okay.-All right, um, take two.
567 00:30:45 "Two years ago, frequent flyer milesmeant nothing to me.
568 00:30:48 Today, miles earned arethe pathetic milestones of my…"
569 00:30:51 -Top?-Yeah, start at the top.
570 00:30:52 [man] All right, take three.
571 00:30:54 [Tenaglia] We would write the voice-overin the beginning.
572 00:30:57 Like, we need contextfor what we're seeing.
573 00:30:59 We need some summary of the scene.
574 00:31:02 "Later, I'm on another swingthrough Southeast Asia
575 00:31:04 with layovers here and there.
576 00:31:06 First stop, Singapore.
577 00:31:07 A quick business dinner withmy editor, Ilangoh Ta--"
578 00:31:10 "Tanalaban"? "Tanadab--" Is it-- No.
579 00:31:13 -[Tenaglia] Thanabalan.-Thanabalan. Okay.
580 00:31:16 "Later, I'm on a…"
581 00:31:17 Tony would come to the narration,and he'd be like, "What is this shit?"
582 00:31:20 You know what I mean? And so,he would start scratching things out.
583 00:31:23 And, you know, first it startedwith a word or two here
584 00:31:26 or a sentence or two here.
585 00:31:28 You know, and then he became,like, maniacal about it.
586 00:31:31 "…book tours, the TV show,I travel for a living.
587 00:31:35 I've committed to memorythe SkyMall magazine.
588 00:31:38 The electronic watering timer: $49.99.
589 00:31:41 Duty-free restrictions:
590 00:31:42 one liter alcohol, two cartons of smokes.
591 00:31:44 Cobbler for dessert? I don't think so.
592 00:31:47 Airport to airport, city to city,
593 00:31:51 I'm starting to feel likea modern-day Willy Loman.
594 00:31:54 Time zone to time zone,country to country,
595 00:31:58 this, it appears, is my life."
596 00:32:01 [Tenaglia] He really understood, like,"This is an extension of me.
597 00:32:05 This is an extension of my writing.
598 00:32:08 I better write in my voice.
599 00:32:11 You know, otherwise this is gonna sound--
600 00:32:13 I'm gonna sound like a traveltelevision host rather than a writer."
601 00:32:21 [Bourdain] Making TV was becomingcreatively satisfying.
602 00:32:25 I wrote the book,and yet continued filming.
603 00:32:28 The tail now wagged the dog.
604 00:32:31 I was hooked on travel,on seeing the world,
605 00:32:34 and on the terms I was seeing it.
606 00:32:39 I was on the roadfor the better part of two years,
607 00:32:42 during which timeeverything in my life changed.
608 00:32:45 I stopped working as a chef,a job whose daily routines
609 00:32:49 have always been the only thingthat stood between me and chaos.
610 00:32:55 My first marriage began to fall apart.
611 00:33:00 [Witherspoon] They were togetheralmost 30 years.
612 00:33:03 You know, he was a traditional romantic.
613 00:33:07 He believed that you could meetyour high school sweetheart
614 00:33:11 and spend the rest of your life with them.
615 00:33:17 [Tenaglia] They were like,you know, Sid and Nancy.
616 00:33:19 They were like two peopleconspiring against the world.
617 00:33:24 It was a love born outof youth and rebellion.
618 00:33:30 Great. Nancy, I hope your divorce lawyer
619 00:33:32 is paying close attention to this footage.
620 00:33:35 Feel free to depose anyoneon this crew at any time.
621 00:33:42 This, too, of course, is partof life's glorious mosaic.
622 00:33:47 [man] Nancy had no interest in fameor being tied to fame,
623 00:33:50 but it just was like a rebirth for Tony.
624 00:33:53 It was like he died and was reborn.
625 00:33:55 I mean, this was a new personwith a new life.
626 00:33:59 [Bourdain] I wrote a crime novelaround that time
627 00:34:01 in which the character's yearningsfor a white-picket-fence kind of a life
628 00:34:05 reflect my own far more truthfullythan any nonfiction I've ever written.
629 00:34:11 Shortly after that, I cruelly burned downmy previous life in its entirety.
630 00:34:25 [explosions]
631 00:34:41 [Bourdain] That dying glowin the background is, uh,
632 00:34:44 I think the fuel depot from the airport…
633 00:34:46 There we are on the balcony in my room,
634 00:34:48 nervously emptying out the minibar, uh,
635 00:34:51 watching jet fuel cook off at the airport.
636 00:34:55 [Tenaglia] We had gone thereto shoot a show
637 00:34:58 for the Travel Channel
638 00:34:59 about how Beirut wasthis renaissance of thought,
639 00:35:03 feeling and energy,and we shot two scenes,
640 00:35:06 and then shit went south really fast.
641 00:35:11 [Bourdain] There wasa border incident with Israel.
642 00:35:14 Hezbollah had kidnappedsome Israeli soldiers,
643 00:35:17 and basically, uh,we got caught up in a war.
644 00:35:20 [shouting in Arabic]
645 00:35:23 Hold on. Let me, uh…
646 00:35:25 Todd, exactly how disgustedand anxious are you?
647 00:35:28 We're damn lucky to be here.
648 00:35:31 We're spending all this time at the pool,watching helicopters come in and out.
649 00:35:35 It was just a waiting game for us.
650 00:35:38 We had to go in the basement
651 00:35:40 because there was a lot of bombs by us.
652 00:35:42 They knocked down our house.
653 00:35:45 You know, look at us in those scenes.
654 00:35:47 We're sitting around the pool,getting tan,
655 00:35:50 you know, watching a war.
656 00:35:54 If there's a single metaphorin this entire experience, that--
657 00:35:59 you know, that's probably it.
658 00:36:03 Not a flattering one.
659 00:36:16 [Collins] When they arrived back,the first thing he said was,
660 00:36:20 "We cannot make a show out of this.
661 00:36:22 I refuse to exploitthis experience in that way."
662 00:36:26 Needless to say,the network saw it differently.
663 00:36:29 There's just no neat sum-up to the story.
664 00:36:32 [Tenaglia] He stopped doing the…
665 00:36:35 rosy sum-up of what we just saw.
666 00:36:39 He just stopped.
667 00:36:41 [Bourdain] In the few years sinceI've started to travel this world,
668 00:36:44 I'd found myself changing.
669 00:36:46 I'd begun to believe thatthe dinner table was the great leveler.
670 00:36:51 Now I'm not so sure.
671 00:36:53 Maybe the world's not like that at all.
672 00:36:56 Maybe in the real world,the one without cameras
673 00:36:59 and happy food and travel shows,
674 00:37:01 everybody, the good and the bad together,
675 00:37:04 are all crushedunder the same terrible wheel.
676 00:37:07 I hope--
677 00:37:09 I really hope I'm wrong about that.
678 00:37:16 [Collins] That ambiguity,that's what he embraced.
679 00:37:20 Fucking open-endednessis where the answers are.
680 00:37:26 [Bourdain]It was an embittering experience.
681 00:37:28 It got all of us thinking about,you know, what's important in life.
682 00:37:35 [woman] Oh, it's recording. Oh, my God.
683 00:37:38 You look like an idiot.
684 00:37:42 Come on, say something,Mr. Anthony Bourdain.
685 00:37:45 This is, uh, our vacation video,
686 00:37:47 and we're gonna show this to our children.
687 00:37:49 Welcome to my first independent film.
688 00:37:52 My spring vacation.
689 00:37:56 -Ow, ow, ow! Come on, I'm driving.-[laughing]
690 00:38:00 How do you say that in English?
691 00:38:02 Is this a bad thing?
692 00:38:03 [speaking Italian]
693 00:38:05 [Ripert] Tony was single,and Ottavia worked for me.
694 00:38:08 Tony called me and he said,"Who is this girl, Ottavia?"
695 00:38:11 And I said, "Well, have fun.
696 00:38:13 You know, don't take it seriously."
697 00:38:16 Eric thought, you know,we were the perfect match
698 00:38:20 for those occasional,you know, rendezvous.
699 00:38:25 You drive like Grandma. [laughs]
700 00:38:27 What do you mean?Does Grandma drive like this?
701 00:38:29 Oh, here, look, no hands.
702 00:38:31 -[tires screeching]-Oh, yeah.
703 00:38:33 [Busia-Bourdain] I thought he was gonna bethis bad boy, a little bit arrogant,
704 00:38:37 and not what I was expecting,but endearing nonetheless.
705 00:38:44 Perfetto.
706 00:38:45 [Bourdain] But you knowwhat the show's about?
707 00:38:47 No.
708 00:38:48 It's about an existential crossroadsin my life.
709 00:38:51 You look bored already.
710 00:38:52 I am.
711 00:38:54 [man] You saw they were pretty smitten.
712 00:38:56 He always has really appreciatedvery strong women.
713 00:39:01 She would cut him no slack.
714 00:39:02 This is a load of bull[bleep].
715 00:39:04 What are the chances this scene isgonna end up on the cutting room floor?
716 00:39:07 Zero. Even if we fight.
717 00:39:10 Now, that would be good television, see?
718 00:39:12 We should fight.
719 00:39:14 [Ripert] A couple of months later,we are in a restaurant,
720 00:39:16 and she's toasting him at the table,
721 00:39:19 and I see tears in his eyes.
722 00:39:21 Real tears.
723 00:39:23 And we're like,"Oh, my God, he's in love."
724 00:39:27 [Busia-Bourdain]Okay, let's do some romantic thing.
725 00:39:29 What, like-- No. Get that…
726 00:39:31 [laughs]
727 00:39:33 [Tenaglia] Tony was like a teenager'sfalling in love for the first time.
728 00:39:37 They changed their clothesand the music that they're listening to,
729 00:39:40 and pieces of him that you thoughtyou knew were… shifting.
730 00:39:48 [Neville] Were you shockedwhen Tony had a kid?
731 00:39:50 [Tenaglia] I was shocked.
732 00:39:51 I had asked him
733 00:39:53 how come he didn't have kids,and he's, like…
734 00:39:56 "It's just not somethingI ever see myself doing, ever."
735 00:40:02 [Bourdain] For most of my life,I wouldn't have been a good father.
736 00:40:06 Too self-involved, too messed-up on drugs.
737 00:40:08 And also afraid.
738 00:40:10 The thought of being frightenedfor a child,
739 00:40:14 you know, I was notup to that kind of fear.
740 00:40:19 Any doubts I might have hadkind of dissipated
741 00:40:23 when I realized how happy,how happy, excited he was
742 00:40:28 that he was gonna become a father.
743 00:40:32 -No phone.-[Bourdain] No phone?
744 00:40:37 Okay. Okay. That's okay.
745 00:40:40 -[Bourdain] That's okay?-That's okay.
746 00:40:42 -Yeah? It's okay, Dada?-Come on. Come on.
747 00:40:45 -Okay, a little hug?-Come on.
748 00:40:48 Come on, now. Okay, okay.
749 00:40:51 -Okay, okay.-Okay.
750 00:40:53 Come on. Come on, Appa.
751 00:40:56 -Appa.-Appa? What about your appa?
752 00:40:58 [speaking gibberish]
753 00:41:03 One, two, three.
754 00:41:06 Come on, come on.
755 00:41:08 But what does the doctor look like?
756 00:41:12 Well, hello. I'm Dr. Tony.
757 00:41:14 What seems to be the problem here?
758 00:41:16 -[coughs]-I'm here to help you get all better.
759 00:41:19 -Hooray!-Yeah!
760 00:41:21 We should help all peoplewhen they need help.
761 00:41:23 Hey, that reminds me, I have to get back.
762 00:41:26 Bye.
763 00:41:28 -Bye.-[Bourdain] This is my life.
764 00:41:30 I wake up. I walk my daughterto her summer camp.
765 00:41:36 You know, I have a few minutesof normal family life,
766 00:41:38 then I, like, takethe elevator downstairs,
767 00:41:40 and there's yet another…
768 00:41:41 [man] Yo, Anthony! How you doing, boss?
769 00:41:43 Hey, what's up, man?
770 00:41:45 [man]
771 00:41:48 Are you on the job?
772 00:41:50 Yo, this guy's got the best show on TV.
773 00:41:53 [laughing]
774 00:41:55 Tony got really famous.Like, every two minutes, it seemed,
775 00:42:00 someone's going up to him.
776 00:42:01 "Hey. Tony, I'm a huge fan.Can I take a photo?
777 00:42:06 Can you talk to me?
778 00:42:08 What are some travel tips? Would I--"
779 00:42:10 It was just incessant, nonstop barrage.
780 00:42:20 He got a kid and he wantedto be a good husband to Ottavia,
781 00:42:23 and everything changed, man.
782 00:42:26 For him.
783 00:42:28 [Bourdain] I'm food bad boy Tony Bourdain.
784 00:42:30 There's nowhere I won't goand nothing I won't eat,
785 00:42:32 as long as I'm paid in emeraldsand my hotel room has a bidet
786 00:42:35 that shoots warm champagne.
787 00:42:36 [announcer] Ladies and gentlemen,Anthony Bourdain.
788 00:42:40 [cheers and applause]
789 00:42:56 And that's when I was, like,"Tony, like, what the fuck, man?
790 00:43:00 How do you maintain your cooland your composure and your nice?"
791 00:43:05 I'll never forget this.He's like, "Listen.
792 00:43:07 Me being nice to someoneand being gracious to them,
793 00:43:10 if that's my job, it certainly beatsbeing a middling line cook
794 00:43:16 at a struggling restaurant."
795 00:43:21 Do you have anythingresembling a normal life?
796 00:43:24 No.
797 00:43:25 I'm asking this 'causethe answer for me is no.
798 00:43:28 I don't want to say no,'cause I just visited my friends.
799 00:43:32 I haven't seen them in many years.
800 00:43:34 -Right.-And I felt I just--
801 00:43:36 I couldn't relate.
802 00:43:38 -I mean, it's like…-I know, I know.
803 00:43:39 And I understand those, but… yeah.
804 00:43:42 I'm a freak. Fucking hell. Jesus.
805 00:43:46 Oh, is this so interesting?
806 00:43:47 What are we waiting for? Is there--
807 00:43:51 [man] We're always at the ready.
808 00:43:52 I'm about to give birth to a big fuckingalien baby at any moment.
809 00:43:56 It's gonna be huge.
810 00:43:58 [man] All right,why don't we take five, then?
811 00:43:59 -Take five.-Holy crap. Jesus.
812 00:44:02 And you're-- How many daysof straight shooting you have?
813 00:44:06 [laughs] Don't ask me that.
814 00:44:10 ["Et moi, et moi, et moi" playing]
815 00:44:57 The internationalnarco trafficker Tom Vitale
816 00:45:00 was arrested in Amsterdam just recently.
817 00:45:02 On examination at the local precinct,
818 00:45:04 they found he'd swallowed
819 00:45:05 a record-breaking 90 bolitas of cocaine.
820 00:45:10 What made it into the shows was,
821 00:45:12 as far as I was concerned,the least interesting…
822 00:45:15 parts of the trip.
823 00:45:18 Welcome to another episodeof 24-Hour Fuck-over.
824 00:45:26 [Vitale] He was a control freakin a lot of ways.
825 00:45:28 You couldn't win an argument with him.
826 00:45:31 Just because there was an idea,he would challenge it.
827 00:45:35 Do you have any lines for me?Maybe you can feed me something.
828 00:45:37 [Vitale]
829 00:45:38 Rome at dusk. There's reallyno place like it, is there?
830 00:45:40 Ooh, romance is in the air.
831 00:45:43 -Who says that?-We're here for two days.
832 00:45:44 When at any point in my lifehave I ever said that?
833 00:45:47 Occasionally you feel inspiredand you say something really nice
834 00:45:50 that makes me tear up.
835 00:45:53 Not today, I guess.
836 00:45:58 [Fallon] I would say his barometerfor bullshit in general
837 00:46:00 was extremely sensitive.
838 00:46:01 But if he felt we were bullshitting,
839 00:46:03 I mean, that's kind ofthe ultimate sin, right?
840 00:46:05 You're gonna walk down along the canal…
841 00:46:07 [Vitale] You'd have to sort oflead from behind with him.
842 00:46:11 What kind of fascist regime is this?
843 00:46:15 [Vitale] Because when Tonywanted to leave, Tony would leave.
844 00:46:17 I mean, stopping him had to be physical.
845 00:46:20 Like putting my body in between himand the escape route.
846 00:46:25 [Bourdain] Keep him away from me.
847 00:46:26 No, no, no.
848 00:46:37 Yeah, I've had enough, man.
849 00:46:38 Too-- Too fucked up.
850 00:46:42 Well, my day's ruined.
851 00:46:48 -[Collins] Really?-[Tenaglia] No.
852 00:46:49 -[Collins] All right. Goodbye.-I'm gonna burst into tears.
853 00:46:52 Yeah, that's pretty good, huh?
854 00:46:53 [woman] In the beginning, it was justChris and Lydia shooting with him.
855 00:46:56 They did that for several years
856 00:46:59 and then brought ina whole team of people,
857 00:47:01 many of them who stuck around to the end.
858 00:47:04 This is for you.
859 00:47:06 -Oh!-[laughter]
860 00:47:07 -[Bourdain] You might need this later.-Oh, I will.
861 00:47:10 [Cho] It was pretty muchthe most formative years of my life.
862 00:47:14 There will be blood.
863 00:47:17 [Cho] There were these battlingsort of teams on the show.
864 00:47:20 -Hi, Diane.-Diane.
865 00:47:21 Hey! Hey!
866 00:47:24 [Bourdain] Zach introduced a littlesomething called the lens change.
867 00:47:28 [Steed] I think Tony liked mefor a couple reasons.
868 00:47:30 One was that, you know,I enjoyed fucking with Tony.
869 00:47:32 You know? I mean, it was--
870 00:47:34 Uh, we all sort of fucked with himin our own ways.
871 00:47:37 [Cho] You know, it was very competitive,
872 00:47:38 and so the bar got pushedevery single episode.
873 00:47:41 [Fallon] Tony was in on everything.
874 00:47:42 Every show was somethingthat was important.
875 00:47:45 Every show had his care in it.
876 00:47:48 Every show potentially had his wrath.
877 00:47:54 I mean, how many emails I got--"Tell editor to un-fuck itself."
878 00:47:59 And I had to translate that to the editor.
879 00:48:01 He would say thatthe greatest sin is mediocrity.
880 00:48:08 "Aspiring to mediocrity.There is a grim, inevitable
881 00:48:11 and all-too-predictable trajectory
882 00:48:14 to the passage ofa good episode of television.
883 00:48:17 People aren't as stupidas your minions clearly believe."
884 00:48:20 -[gunshot]-"They don't need the truth pounded home
885 00:48:22 with meaningless platitudesor bland, generic sum-ups.
886 00:48:25 -They'll get it."-[gunshot]
887 00:48:26 And it goes on for several pages.
888 00:48:30 "Don't empower these squirrel-balled nerds
889 00:48:33 by letting them get their way.
890 00:48:35 They will then nibble this show to death
891 00:48:38 like hungry ducks.
892 00:48:41 As always, best wishes and respect. Tony."
893 00:48:45 And this was written to somebodyhe truly liked and respected.
894 00:48:53 [Cho] It bothered himif everyone liked the show.
895 00:48:56 He was, like, "It shouldcreate conversation."
896 00:48:59 [Bourdain] How old is he?
897 00:49:00 Does he even remember the planes?
898 00:49:03 He was a child.
899 00:49:04 [speaking Lao]
900 00:49:06 -[man] He doesn't remember.-Doesn't remember. All these years…
901 00:49:08 [Vitale] He was a shockinglycounter-cultural voice.
902 00:49:11 I mean, so many of the countriesI worked in with him
903 00:49:14 were still dealing with the falloutfrom whatever America had done.
904 00:49:19 [man] For him, it's losing everything,
905 00:49:21 uh, because he's the--
906 00:49:23 the head of the family,feeding the family.
907 00:49:26 Um, so after losing his arms and his legs,
908 00:49:30 uh, it's a great disaster for his life.
909 00:49:34 [speaking Lao]
910 00:49:37 Uh, he wants to know if you are afraidof seeing the reality.
911 00:49:41 Ah. Afraid?
912 00:49:44 Um… uh, no.
913 00:49:46 It hurts, but I think that's appropriate.You know, it should. I think Americans--
914 00:49:52 Every American should seethe results of war.
915 00:49:57 I think it's, uh…
916 00:50:00 the least I can do is to see the worldwith open eyes.
917 00:50:18 [Bourdain] You'll notice that,in general, I'm not myself.
918 00:50:23 Where's the snark, the attitude?
919 00:50:25 Well, what do you say to this?
920 00:50:31 I honestly don't know.
921 00:50:37 People are not statistics.
922 00:50:39 Surely there's valuein showing the little things.
923 00:50:46 How's business for her?Uh, can you ask her?
924 00:50:48 [speaking foreign language]
925 00:50:49 Not really good this time.
926 00:50:51 -Not good?-No.
927 00:50:53 I mean, the country's situation,
928 00:50:54 people don't have any income, any money,
929 00:50:56 so they can't buy food in the street.
930 00:50:58 So you can imagine that.
931 00:51:00 That's why you see a lot ofguys here begging, you know.
932 00:51:03 "Can you buy me some food?Can you give me something?"
933 00:51:05 [Liebler] The biggest issuethat we dealt with was trying to be,
934 00:51:11 you know, the fly on the wall
935 00:51:13 and going into a placeand not having an effect.
936 00:51:16 Like, this episode is a prime exampleof just trying to help,
937 00:51:21 and it rearing its ugly head.
938 00:51:25 We have all this leftover food.
939 00:51:27 Tony's like, "Let's justgive it to the people here."
940 00:51:33 You know, they're hungry,and of course mayhem ensued.
941 00:51:40 Larger kids were just, like,throwing younger kids out of the line,
942 00:51:43 and it was a very ugly scenario.
943 00:51:48 [overlapping chatter]
944 00:51:59 [Chang] I think Tony ultimately sawthat it wasn't just food.
945 00:52:04 There's suffering in this world,and that seems to be omnipresent.
946 00:52:09 How do you spend time with people
947 00:52:11 and-- and you empathizewith their plight--
948 00:52:14 How does that notchange you fundamentally?
949 00:52:16 Whee. Whee.
950 00:52:20 You going to outer space?
951 00:52:22 Yes.
952 00:52:25 Going higher.
953 00:52:27 [Ripert] He was traveling 250 days a year,
954 00:52:30 and, you know, when you come back home,
955 00:52:32 you have to be a husband,you have to be a father.
956 00:52:36 With the little time he had,he was very attentive.
957 00:52:43 Sandcastles on the beach, all day long.
958 00:52:45 [laughing]
959 00:52:53 [Tenaglia] I think it was a surpriseand shock for him,
960 00:52:57 that late in life,
961 00:52:58 to experience that kind of love.
962 00:53:01 -[Ariane] Can I use this hand?-That's okay. Use that hand.
963 00:53:04 We'll pull that out and usethat hand for the crumbs.
964 00:53:06 It's okay.
965 00:53:08 [Tenaglia] It moved him to his core.
966 00:53:11 And I think he was constantly aware
967 00:53:13 of, like, not wanting to screw it up.
968 00:53:17 Are you really in this countryright now, or is this a mirage?
969 00:53:19 [Bourdain] I-- I am my stunt double.
970 00:53:23 Couldn't you get someone better-looking?
971 00:53:24 Yeah. Oh!
972 00:53:27 [Quint] Fans of the show think he hadthe greatest job in the world,
973 00:53:29 but it was one that there wasno way to ever escape from.
974 00:53:34 Couldn't really go home for a dayand not be Anthony Bourdain.
975 00:53:38 [Bourdain] What kind are you making?
976 00:53:39 Cookie. What's the best kind?
977 00:53:41 I don't know. Uh, are youobserving child labor laws?
978 00:53:45 [Quint] His daughter used to do this joke
979 00:53:47 where she would get up and say,"I'm Anthony Bourdain."
980 00:53:49 Hi. My name's Anthony Bourdain.
981 00:53:51 "You may know me from such TV shows as…"
982 00:53:53 Maybe you know me from such shows as, uh…
983 00:53:56 [Quint] She knew that her father
984 00:53:59 and Anthony Bourdainwere very separate entities.
985 00:54:04 [gags, groans]
986 00:54:06 [Bourdain] You're picking that nosepretty hard there, young lady.
987 00:54:09 [both grunt]
988 00:54:11 Oh! God!
989 00:54:13 I'm through being cool.
990 00:54:15 Or, more accurately,I'm through entertaining the notion
991 00:54:18 that anybody could even considerthe possibility of coolness
992 00:54:21 emanating fromor residing anywhere near me.
993 00:54:24 Everybody kick to the camera.
994 00:54:27 [all] Hyah!
995 00:54:29 [Bourdain] The essence of cool,after all, is not giving a fuck.
996 00:54:33 And let's face it,I most definitely give a fuck now.
997 00:54:39 You know, my whole life,
998 00:54:41 I was like a kid with my nosepressed against the glass,
999 00:54:43 like, wondering, you know,"What must it be like to, like,
1000 00:54:45 have a kid and, you know, a normal family
1001 00:54:49 and stand in the backyardwith this silly apron,
1002 00:54:51 you know, barbecuing burgers?"
1003 00:54:53 -And so when I find---Can I get a picture of that?
1004 00:54:55 When I find myself doing that,
1005 00:54:57 I am, like, ridiculously stupid happy.
1006 00:55:00 Like, I do a lot of pretty cool shit now.
1007 00:55:02 I travel all over the world,I see all these amazing things,
1008 00:55:05 but I'm never happier than whenI'm standing in the backyard
1009 00:55:09 being, like, TV dad, because…
1010 00:55:13 I feel normal. You know?Whatever the hell that means.
1011 00:55:16 Yeah, what does that mean?
1012 00:55:19 [Bourdain] I live a very strange life.
1013 00:55:22 I try to make up for it when I go homeby cooking aggressively.
1014 00:55:26 Like, I try to kill peoplearound me with food.
1015 00:55:28 You know, like, "Eat, eat," you know?
1016 00:55:30 "Why aren't you eating?Don't you love me?"
1017 00:55:33 [Collins] He straddled the world ofbeing the domestic guy,
1018 00:55:36 but that pull for the experience outside--
1019 00:55:41 you know, like as ifit was gonna slip away
1020 00:55:43 if he wasn't there-- was equally as great.
1021 00:55:50 [Vitale] He was always rushing.
1022 00:55:52 He was rushing everywhere.
1023 00:55:54 He was rushing to get into the scene.
1024 00:55:56 He was rushing to get out of the scene.
1025 00:55:59 Rushing to get out of the country.
1026 00:56:01 Rushing to go somewhere next,even if he had nowhere to go.
1027 00:56:06 [rock music playing]
1028 00:56:18 Making time…
1029 00:56:20 [man] Traveling the Earth alone
1030 00:56:22 is what I'm accustomed to being on tour.
1031 00:56:24 And as fathers,we bonded over that feeling
1032 00:56:28 and feeling like, "I'm hereto give a piece of myself away."
1033 00:56:31 And, um, as the years go on,that can be difficult.
1034 00:56:36 -Close.-The wind. That was the wind.
1035 00:56:38 Right. We got to-- We got to,you know, factor that in.
1036 00:56:42 There we go.
1037 00:56:44 [Homme] And we just hit it off.
1038 00:56:45 What do you call an eternal optimist?
1039 00:56:47 An accordion player with a beeper.
1040 00:56:49 [laughter]
1041 00:56:51 [Homme] It's hard to make friends.
1042 00:56:53 To be at the tip of the spear,it's like asking for loneliness.
1043 00:56:57 Oh!
1044 00:56:59 Oh, yeah.
1045 00:57:01 That motherfucker bled out already.
1046 00:57:03 [Homme] Straight to the jugular.
1047 00:57:07 Making more excuses
1048 00:57:11 Pulling the wool…
1049 00:57:12 [Homme] Can you make it three?
1050 00:57:14 You got it.
1051 00:57:16 -[Homme] Well, cheers to that.-Cheers.
1052 00:57:18 I always think of, "Yo, ho, ho,a pirate's life for me."
1053 00:57:22 That's-- That's what I think.
1054 00:57:23 I mean, that's…
1055 00:57:24 But you've been, you've been touring for…
1056 00:57:26 Since I was 18, yeah. You know?
1057 00:57:29 You know, but it's weird.
1058 00:57:31 I'm home for-- I'mridiculously happy for a week,
1059 00:57:34 and then I start getting, like, crazy,like I should be doing something.
1060 00:57:37 I call it the bittersweet curse.
1061 00:57:38 Nothing feels better than going home.
1062 00:57:41 And nothing feels betterthan leaving home.
1063 00:57:43 [both laugh]
1064 00:57:45 -Yeah, you got a point.-You know?
1065 00:57:56 [Homme] I loved watching himpick up influence
1066 00:57:58 as he went along through life.
1067 00:58:02 He's a great American storyteller,
1068 00:58:04 and he started off as a voyeur.
1069 00:58:10 He's watching theseand detailing these great tales
1070 00:58:14 of what you're seeing.
1071 00:58:15 And then, all of a sudden, he's startingto live those stories that he's telling.
1072 00:58:20 He's starting to look inside.
1073 00:58:24 [water flowing]
1074 00:58:34 [Bourdain] I think I said earlierthat I was gonna tell you the truth.
1075 00:58:38 This is part of it.
1076 00:58:42 I was unqualified for the job.
1077 00:58:46 I was in deep waters,and fast-flowing ones at that.
1078 00:58:51 The currents could changeat any time without warning.
1079 00:58:56 Like a lot of travelers,I started to turn inward
1080 00:58:59 from the view out the window,
1081 00:59:00 started to see what was going on out there
1082 00:59:02 through an ever-narrowing lens.
1083 00:59:07 It is written that I should be loyalto the nightmare of my choice.
1084 00:59:11 I think I now understand what that means.
1085 00:59:16 [thunder rumbling]
1086 00:59:19 [Bourdain] You want to be my pilot?
1087 00:59:21 [man] Yeah.
1088 00:59:22 I don't see what the problem is.Weather looks fine to me.
1089 00:59:26 [thunder rumbling]
1090 00:59:28 I'm sure we'll be fine.
1091 00:59:30 [loud thunderclap]
1092 00:59:32 Wow. Nice.
1093 00:59:35 Security situation good,weather not so good.
1094 00:59:38 Are you frightened, by the way?
1095 00:59:40 Yeah, look at him. Look at him.He's scared shitless.
1096 00:59:42 I don't like flying.
1097 00:59:51 [Vitale] I think that the Congo was,without question,
1098 00:59:55 the most dangerous placewe ever made the show.
1099 00:59:59 It was something that couldn't be done.That was a big part of it.
1100 01:00:02 And we're always gonna figure out a wayto do something that couldn't be done.
1101 01:00:07 [Bourdain] Everyone getseverything he wants.
1102 01:00:10 I wanted to see the Congo.
1103 01:00:13 And for my sins, they let me.
1104 01:00:17 This is a place I read about as a boy.
1105 01:00:20 In Heart of Darkness, Conrad described it
1106 01:00:22 as a twisting snake with its headin the Atlantic Ocean
1107 01:00:25 and its tail buried deepin Africa's heart.
1108 01:00:30 [Collins] Congo was a fulfillmentof an enormous dream.
1109 01:00:33 In our little fantasy, we were havingour Apocalypse Now moment.
1110 01:00:38 [Bourdain] We've rented a trusty vessel,
1111 01:00:40 and I shall dub thee the Captain Willard.
1112 01:00:47 [Fallon] Tony was finding ways
1113 01:00:49 to push himself towards his--not just understanding of the world--
1114 01:00:53 but understanding of himself.
1115 01:00:55 [Kurtz] Are you an assassin?
1116 01:00:57 [Willard] I'm a soldier.
1117 01:01:00 [Fallon] It's, like, which characteris he in that film?
1118 01:01:04 [Bourdain]They say my methods are unsound.
1119 01:01:06 Are my methods unsound?
1120 01:01:10 Do you think my methods are unsound?
1121 01:01:11 [Fallon] I haven't seenany method at all, Colonel.
1122 01:01:14 In Congo, he got to be someone
1123 01:01:16 who has pushed himself intothe lunacy of a world without law,
1124 01:01:22 without order, without structure.
1125 01:01:23 [squawking]
1126 01:01:25 [Fallon] He got to stand therewith a three-foot machete
1127 01:01:28 and direct the assassination of chickens.
1128 01:01:36 When you get really deep into travel,
1129 01:01:39 I think there's an itchthat you want to scratch
1130 01:01:41 that is out on the edge of that envelope,
1131 01:01:44 where chaos rules.
1132 01:01:48 Because it strips awayall of the functional artifice
1133 01:01:52 of how we go through our life,
1134 01:01:54 and it leaves you withjust the sensory experience.
1135 01:02:22 [interviewer] Anthony Bourdain,the renowned chef and best-selling author,
1136 01:02:25 has a new program, Parts Unknown,
1137 01:02:28 and it showcases Bourdain's gift
1138 01:02:30 for finding the essenceof a country or a culture.
1139 01:02:33 Is it about the journalism,or is it about the tourism?
1140 01:02:37 Is it about the people?Is it about the food?
1141 01:02:40 It's a strange combinationof food, politics
1142 01:02:43 and a decisively personal point of view.
1143 01:02:46 His reports from Israel,the Palestinian territories,
1144 01:02:49 Mexico and Lyon, France,were simply superb.
1145 01:02:51 He's traveled roughly 662,000 miles--
1146 01:02:57 around the globe 26 times.
1147 01:03:01 You know, I actually went to Tangierbecause you had gone there.
1148 01:03:03 And you've had a big impact on me.
1149 01:03:07 [Witherspoon] Tony was very aware
1150 01:03:09 of his own ability to promoteother people's voices.
1151 01:03:14 But I do think that,even though we moved to CNN,
1152 01:03:17 he won a Peabody and several Emmys,
1153 01:03:20 he began to question who wasbenefiting from these shows.
1154 01:03:38 Okay, so we're just gonnaset up a shot with the TV.
1155 01:03:41 Me laying on the bed, watching CNN.
1156 01:03:43 -[man] Okay.-Libya news.
1157 01:03:48 [announcer] This is CNN.
1158 01:03:49 [reporter] It is Friday, January 25th.
1159 01:03:51 I'm Kristie Lu Stout. This is…
1160 01:03:53 [Bourdain] I'm not a newsman.I'm not a journalist.
1161 01:03:56 I'm not an advocate. I'm not an educator.
1162 01:03:59 I'm not looking to inspire or, uh--
1163 01:04:02 I don't have a political agenda.
1164 01:04:04 If anything, I like very muchgoing to a place thinking one thing
1165 01:04:06 and being completely wrongabout all of it.
1166 01:04:08 …believed to have ties to al-Qaeda.
1167 01:04:20 [Ripert] He was a journalistand he was political,
1168 01:04:23 but he was a storyteller.
1169 01:04:26 And he didn't realize, I think,
1170 01:04:29 how political he was.
1171 01:04:33 [Bourdain] We tend to see places
1172 01:04:35 in the Middle East and Africain particular--
1173 01:04:39 we only see them when bad things happen.
1174 01:04:46 If you just follow the news,you'll be reminded
1175 01:04:48 about kidnappings in Algeria,unrest in Tunisia,
1176 01:04:52 terrorist cells to the south,deadly riots in Egypt,
1177 01:04:56 and, of course, Islamic extremistattacks in Benghazi
1178 01:04:59 that killed the US ambassador.
1179 01:05:02 All those things are very real concerns.
1180 01:05:06 But if you only lookat what's on the news,
1181 01:05:09 you can miss maybewhat's a bigger picture.
1182 01:05:28 [Chang] You can literally see it
1183 01:05:30 as he goes and travelsmore and more and more.
1184 01:05:34 It was almost never about food, you know?
1185 01:05:36 I think it was about Tony learninghow to be a better person.
1186 01:05:42 You know, I try to emulate Christin small ways every day.
1187 01:05:45 You do?
1188 01:05:48 -Yeah. Can't you tell?-[both laugh]
1189 01:05:51 And I mean that in a--in a completely non-disrespectful way.
1190 01:05:54 No, no, I can imagine.I mean, you're trying.
1191 01:05:57 You are inspiringso many people with the show.
1192 01:06:00 You have a good karma.
1193 01:06:02 Can't believe you said that.
1194 01:06:03 -Yeah.-Good karma?
1195 01:06:05 I think so.
1196 01:06:07 -Well…-[both laugh]
1197 01:06:10 -Doesn't this concern you as a Buddhist?-This is a good karma.
1198 01:06:14 -Look we're sitting here in Provence.-Yeah.
1199 01:06:16 -So?-Wait a minute.
1200 01:06:17 -We just had this fantastic meal.-Yeah.
1201 01:06:19 We're moving onto the 2011 after the 2010.
1202 01:06:22 Life, admittedly for you,has been pretty sweet.
1203 01:06:25 Yeah.
1204 01:06:26 -Isn't that worrying to you?-No.
1205 01:06:29 We're sitting in Provence.It's like a wine label.
1206 01:06:31 The next life cannot possiblybe better than this.
1207 01:06:33 It's probably gonna suck.
1208 01:06:35 Enjoy every minuteof this now, Eric. And pray.
1209 01:06:38 Pray, pray that this is it,
1210 01:06:40 because if you're rightand there is a next life,
1211 01:06:42 we are fucked, my friend.
1212 01:06:44 I may come back as a sea cucumber,
1213 01:06:46 but you're coming back as, like, a Yorkie.
1214 01:06:49 Or, you know, if you're lucky.
1215 01:06:50 [laughing]
1216 01:06:52 I'll take the Yorkie.
1217 01:06:54 [Chang] At the end of the day,Tony's dark as fuck, man.
1218 01:06:57 Give you an example.
1219 01:06:59 Everyone askedTony's fucking favorite music,
1220 01:07:01 and he would always givethe same bullshit answers,
1221 01:07:03 like, uh, "96 Misteriosos--"or that fucking song.
1222 01:07:07 -He loved that song.-[Neville] "96 Tears."
1223 01:07:09 "96 Tears."
1224 01:07:10 And he loved, um, Super Fly
1225 01:07:12 and, um, and Curtis Mayfield's soundtrack.
1226 01:07:15 There's no downers in the fucking bunch.
1227 01:07:20 This was what Tony told mewas his favorite song.
1228 01:07:25 ["Anemone" playing]
1229 01:07:34 He loved this fucking song.
1230 01:07:54 It's a great song.
1231 01:07:56 But it's heroin music.
1232 01:08:06 [Bourdain] In the early '70s,this is where I lived.
1233 01:08:09 You know, back then,if you brought us heroin,
1234 01:08:11 we would've said, "Oh, cool.
1235 01:08:12 I'll totally-- I would liketo try some of that."
1236 01:08:15 It wasn't like I fell into itor accidentally got addicted
1237 01:08:18 or, you know, "Oh, really, it's addicting?
1238 01:08:20 Gee, how'd that happen?" No, I knew.
1239 01:08:23 [Chang] He never really dealtwith the insecurity
1240 01:08:25 and all the issues that put himdown that road to begin with.
1241 01:08:31 You know, it's a lot easierwhen you talk to Choe about this,
1242 01:08:33 'cause, like,that motherfucker is so dark.
1243 01:08:37 [Choe] People forgetAnthony Bourdain was a junkie.
1244 01:08:40 Like, he's a drug addict.
1245 01:08:42 And I'm also a junkie.
1246 01:08:43 I don't do drugs,but I do everything else.
1247 01:08:46 Overeaters Anonymous, Debtors Anonymous,
1248 01:08:48 Gamblers Anonymous, Sex Addicts Anonymous,
1249 01:08:50 Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous.
1250 01:08:52 Uh, I go to all the meetings.
1251 01:08:54 [Bourdain] I'll tell you somethingreally shameful about myself.
1252 01:08:58 The first time I shot up,
1253 01:08:59 I looked at myself in the mirrorwith a big grin.
1254 01:09:02 You know, something was missing in me.
1255 01:09:05 Some part of me wanted to be a dope fiend.
1256 01:09:07 My whole life wasleading up to that point.
1257 01:09:10 In my mind, it was my first steptowards being an artist.
1258 01:09:16 Do you think a certain levelof dissatisfaction or unhappiness
1259 01:09:19 is an integral partof the creative process?
1260 01:09:21 I think even great art can be createdwhen you're happy,
1261 01:09:24 but I think the best art in the universeis created through intense suffering.
1262 01:09:31 So then, do you put yourselfin a situation
1263 01:09:34 where you're constantly in pain?
1264 01:09:38 And the answer to that question is yes.
1265 01:09:40 That's just about everybody I know.
1266 01:09:42 I don't know what this says about me.
1267 01:09:48 [Choe] I think it was one of the firstconversations I ever had with him.
1268 01:09:50 I was like, "Hey, I knowI'm just meeting you,
1269 01:09:52 but I don't know one heroin addictthat has quit cold turkey besides you.
1270 01:09:57 Tell me how you did it."
1271 01:10:01 I got through, but, you know, in my case,
1272 01:10:03 it was like I looked in a mirror and I--
1273 01:10:07 I saw somebody worth saving, um,
1274 01:10:09 or that I wanted to at leasttry real hard and save.
1275 01:10:13 Um…
1276 01:10:15 you know, nobody--
1277 01:10:18 nobody saved me.
1278 01:10:21 And he goes, "You just work."
1279 01:10:25 When he told me that,I bought into it when I first met him.
1280 01:10:29 And then as I got to know him more,
1281 01:10:32 I realized it jumped.The addiction jumped.
1282 01:10:43 [Fallon] When he threw himselfinto something,
1283 01:10:46 he threw himself completely.
1284 01:10:50 Jujitsu was a good onebecause he got super healthy.
1285 01:10:53 He looked great. He stopped smoking.
1286 01:10:55 He felt energized. He felt powerful.
1287 01:10:59 Oh! [laughs]
1288 01:11:01 Abort.
1289 01:11:03 [Bourdain] I started at 58.
1290 01:11:05 My wife is a fairly high-level competitor
1291 01:11:07 -and, uh, trains every---[man] Higher level than you are?
1292 01:11:10 [Bourdain] Way, way beyondwhere I'll ever be.
1293 01:11:13 [Quint] Ottavia wanted to be able tokill anyone who came at their daughter.
1294 01:11:20 So that's where the initial jujitsuinterest in that family came from,
1295 01:11:24 and it was a good thing for Tonyto be obsessed with for a while.
1296 01:11:29 [Busia-Bourdain] There is this aspectof problem-solving under pressure
1297 01:11:34 that was really appealing to him.
1298 01:11:36 [man] Step over!
1299 01:11:37 [Busia-Bourdain] But anyone who gets intojujitsu becomes impossible to be around.
1300 01:11:41 I know because… from experience.
1301 01:11:45 You're gonna have to work!
1302 01:11:46 [Fallon] At a certain point, you're, like,"Stop talking about fucking jujitsu."
1303 01:11:49 I don't know anything about jujitsu.
1304 01:11:51 Like, I can't have this conversation,
1305 01:11:54 and yet I'm on like hour 150talking to you about jujitsu.
1306 01:12:00 [Vitale] I mean, his attentionand focus was so strong,
1307 01:12:04 but there was always a timeline.
1308 01:12:07 I don't think there was anything thatwould have lasted forever in his world.
1309 01:12:12 No person, place, thing, interest.
1310 01:12:15 [Busia-Bourdain laughs]I have to show you first.
1311 01:12:18 Can I show you once? Okay.
1312 01:12:20 [playing piano]
1313 01:12:21 Then you skip one and you go down.
1314 01:12:24 Then you skip one and you go down.
1315 01:12:27 Then you come back up and…
1316 01:12:29 Oh!
1317 01:12:30 [Busia-Bourdain] It always seemed likewhat he wanted was,
1318 01:12:34 you know, this, uh,idyllic picture of, like, you know,
1319 01:12:38 a family and ordinary life.
1320 01:12:42 -[Bourdain] No.-Come on, you were doing it…
1321 01:12:44 But then when he got it,
1322 01:12:47 I don't know if it was--
1323 01:12:50 I don't know.
1324 01:12:52 Yeah.
1325 01:12:53 After a while, maybethat wasn't enough anymore.
1326 01:13:00 [interviewer] You devotedyour book to family.
1327 01:13:02 -[Bourdain] Yep.-The joys of being normal.
1328 01:13:04 And now you've-- you've split.
1329 01:13:06 -Yep.-So, I just, like--
1330 01:13:07 Are you rethinking aboutbeing normal, or where's your…
1331 01:13:09 Well, I mean, what is normal?
1332 01:13:11 I think, you know, what doesthe American family look like?
1333 01:13:13 I mean, I travel 250 days a year.
1334 01:13:16 You know, how normalcould I ever hope to be?
1335 01:13:29 Tony and I had been pretty muchliving separate
1336 01:13:33 under the same roof for--
1337 01:13:36 for quite some time.
1338 01:13:41 Even if we didn't work outas a married couple, you know,
1339 01:13:46 we're still really good friends,and our focus was Ariane.
1340 01:13:50 [all laughing]
1341 01:13:53 [Busia-Bourdain]That romantic love kind of dissipated
1342 01:13:56 after he started traveling so intensely,
1343 01:14:00 and then we couldn't follow him.
1344 01:14:09 [boy] It flowers onceevery five years. That's all.
1345 01:14:15 I'll be back before it flowers again.
1346 01:14:19 Cross my heart.
1347 01:14:27 [Witherspoon] He was devastated.
1348 01:14:29 He was losing his home base.
1349 01:14:31 And it left him incredibly vulnerable.
1350 01:14:43 I think Tony did blame himself.
1351 01:14:46 And I think it also left him wondering
1352 01:14:48 whether or not he was lovable.
1353 01:15:00 [Bourdain] Is it worseto be someplace awful
1354 01:15:03 when you're by yourself
1355 01:15:04 or someplace really nicethat you can't share with anyone?
1356 01:15:15 [Choe] I mean, I have an emailthat he sent me that haunts me
1357 01:15:18 that was just straight-up…
1358 01:15:21 you know, out of the blue.
1359 01:15:24 "David, this is a crazy thing to ask,but I'm curious…"
1360 01:15:29 [Bourdain]"…and my life is sort of shit now.
1361 01:15:33 You are successful and I am successful.
1362 01:15:37 And I'm wondering:
1363 01:15:39 Are you happy?"
1364 01:15:49 I know how hard that must've beenfor him to even write that email.
1365 01:15:53 To reach out to someone and be, like,"Hey, man, I'm not doing well."
1366 01:16:07 [Quint] The era of his life withhis child and Ottavia…
1367 01:16:13 I think it was sort ofan interruption of his trajectory.
1368 01:16:23 Did he change coursein the last two years?
1369 01:16:26 No, he got back on track,
1370 01:16:27 which was not the greatest track.
1371 01:16:30 [chattering]
1372 01:16:32 [woman] Hi, Tony. How are you?
1373 01:16:34 [Bourdain] I'm all right. Here?
1374 01:16:36 Outstanding. Good.
1375 01:16:37 [sighs] That's awesome.
1376 01:16:39 I even brought a note-- I took notes.
1377 01:16:42 I was thinking of all my--all of my ailments and problems.
1378 01:16:48 I haven't done this since I was, um…
1379 01:16:52 uh, I was a teenager.
1380 01:16:54 My parents caught me with drugs,
1381 01:16:56 and as part of the deal,I saw a therapist briefly.
1382 01:17:02 And what did you feel about it?
1383 01:17:04 It's-- It's exhausting.
1384 01:17:05 I mean, I do tend to havea sort of a manic personality.
1385 01:17:10 Everything is going really, really greator it's not going great.
1386 01:17:14 It can happen at any time.It's a random thing.
1387 01:17:16 One minute, I'm okay,everything's going all right,
1388 01:17:19 and then suddenly it's-- one little thing
1389 01:17:21 just sort of sets me off,and then I find myself,
1390 01:17:24 uh, you know, increasingly, uh, thinking--
1391 01:17:27 I do-- I do, I think about, like,
1392 01:17:29 momentary fantasies of harmingother people or myself.
1393 01:17:33 Like I want to kill somebody or choke them
1394 01:17:35 or break their arms.
1395 01:17:37 Uh, I think about that a lot.
1396 01:17:40 I'd like to be happier.I'd like to be able to be calmer.
1397 01:17:44 I'd like to be able to relax.
1398 01:17:46 I'd like to be able to,you know, look out the window
1399 01:17:48 and say, "Yay, life is good."
1400 01:17:51 -And you don't?-No.
1401 01:17:53 [chuckles]
1402 01:17:56 Never?
1403 01:17:59 Maybe a few seconds here and there.
1404 01:18:01 There is a lineduring your life of loneliness
1405 01:18:08 or feeling like,"I want to kill somebody."
1406 01:18:10 I think that maybeyou should start thinking…
1407 01:18:15 do you really want to change anything?
1408 01:18:25 Do you really want to changethe way you feel?
1409 01:18:33 I suspect it's too late.
1410 01:18:40 I can settle down
1411 01:18:45 And be doing just fine
1412 01:18:49 Till I hear…
1413 01:18:52 I love this car. I'm having car envy.
1414 01:18:55 [all laugh]
1415 01:18:57 [woman] We were both constantly talkingabout that movie Vanishing Point.
1416 01:19:02 He liked fast cars, as well.I love fast cars.
1417 01:19:05 And then we becamepen pals really for years
1418 01:19:08 and, um, talked about everything.
1419 01:19:13 His whole entire personalitywas that of a searcher.
1420 01:19:17 I just know that he was definitelysearching for something, and…
1421 01:19:23 it was kind of agony for him.
1422 01:19:25 When the Lord made me
1423 01:19:30 He made a ramblin' man…
1424 01:19:34 [Bourdain] It's this relentless instinctto fuck up a good thing.
1425 01:19:38 I think it's something that people on TV,
1426 01:19:40 people who write, people who cook, share.
1427 01:19:44 This difficulty in giving loveand receiving love--
1428 01:19:47 they just don't quite know how to do it.
1429 01:19:51 [Mosshart] A lot of peopleloved him a lot.
1430 01:19:54 I don't know if he believed it.
1431 01:19:58 [Bourdain] So, what do you think?I mean, in a metaphysical way,
1432 01:20:03 -when you look back on your life…-Yeah.
1433 01:20:05 …for me, I always feelthis little unease, like, you know…
1434 01:20:09 You feel you haven't suffered enough yet
1435 01:20:10 -or you haven't done enough…-How the fuck did this happen?
1436 01:20:12 -Or, yeah.-You know?
1437 01:20:13 -How'd this happen, you know?-No.
1438 01:20:14 No, I know. I'm still curious.
1439 01:20:17 You seem like a curious person.
1440 01:20:19 -It's my only virtue.-You're-- There you go.
1441 01:20:20 All right. Curious is a good thing to be.
1442 01:20:24 Given your life…
1443 01:20:27 what thrills you?
1444 01:20:29 What just thrills the shit out of you now?
1445 01:20:32 Uh, this is very embarrassing, but--It's really embarr--
1446 01:20:36 Being loved
1447 01:20:38 and actually appreciating the peoplethat are giving that to me.
1448 01:20:43 Mm-hmm.
1449 01:20:47 [horns honking]
1450 01:20:53 [Bourdain] Whenever you guys are ready,the cameras are rolling.
1451 01:20:55 We're ready to go.
1452 01:21:00 [sighs] All right, you're up?
1453 01:21:02 So, uh, where are we?But don't mention the name of the place.
1454 01:21:05 -I'm even turning the napkin over---No. Why?
1455 01:21:06 -You don't want to blow this place up.-I don't give a shit.
1456 01:21:09 -You've been eating here for how long?-Since I was a-- Since I was a kid.
1457 01:21:13 So you want to come in hereand see nothing but Americans?
1458 01:21:16 Nothing but?
1459 01:21:17 -Nothing but?-Well, yeah.
1460 01:21:18 -I mean, just an army of---Well, yes, so nobody busts my balls.
1461 01:21:22 Okay, then. We are at the--
1462 01:21:24 So, giving up on that.
1463 01:21:25 Okay. There we go.
1464 01:21:27 How many generationsof filmmakers in your family?
1465 01:21:30 Hmm, a lot.
1466 01:21:32 [laughs] Cheers.
1467 01:21:33 [Steed] When Tony met Asia, he's like,
1468 01:21:35 "She's the best.Oh, my God, she's so great."
1469 01:21:37 You know, and, like,when you were in high school
1470 01:21:40 and you got laidfor the first time or something.
1471 01:21:42 You know, I'm happiestwhen life is kind of like a film.
1472 01:21:46 So you're happy in the illusion.
1473 01:21:49 -'Cause film is an illusion.-Yes.
1474 01:21:50 Yeah, I am.
1475 01:21:52 No, me, too. I understand you.
1476 01:21:56 [Busia-Bourdain]He seemed really happy with her.
1477 01:21:58 [chattering]
1478 01:22:00 You know, I was, like, well,he found someone he wants to be with.
1479 01:22:04 You know, I'm happy for him.
1480 01:22:08 He told me that she was very insecureabout their relationship,
1481 01:22:12 so he just asked me to stop postingpictures of us on social media.
1482 01:22:18 And I think he really thoughthe was doing the right thing
1483 01:22:22 to make sure that the personhe loved felt secure.
1484 01:22:27 [Bourdain] Is that a normal urge?
1485 01:22:29 -[Argento] For humans?-I want to be normal?
1486 01:22:30 I want to be like everybody else?
1487 01:22:32 I kind of wanted to be like everybody elsewhen I was a kid, at least for a while.
1488 01:22:35 I didn't understand why I couldn't be.
1489 01:22:37 I think people are happier
1490 01:22:39 when they feel like they belong somewhere.
1491 01:22:41 -I just---That's why I'm never happy.
1492 01:22:43 Because I feel I never belong.
1493 01:22:51 [Mosshart] I knew who she was,but he never would use her name.
1494 01:22:54 He would say "crazy Italianactress" in all the emails.
1495 01:22:58 All I know is thathe wrote to me a few times
1496 01:23:00 and said that it wasgonna end very, very badly,
1497 01:23:03 and that was way back.
1498 01:23:06 Um, he knew it.
1499 01:23:07 [both] Oh!
1500 01:23:09 [laughing]
1501 01:23:12 [whistling]
1502 01:23:13 I bring you to the best places.
1503 01:23:15 [both laugh]
1504 01:23:17 Fuck Michelin.
1505 01:23:19 Michelin?
1506 01:23:21 [Tenaglia] His last relationship,
1507 01:23:23 I guess when you look at it,it's not that surprising.
1508 01:23:30 In many ways, it feels ellipticalfrom the very beginning.
1509 01:23:37 [Bourdain] Now, some of you might ask,
1510 01:23:39 "How is this food-related?"Fuck if I know.
1511 01:23:41 I guess if I crushed my skull on a rock,
1512 01:23:43 parts of me will becomepart of the food chain.
1513 01:23:48 It was one that had,at its center, um, extremes.
1514 01:23:55 It's as if he can't feel in the mid-zone.
1515 01:24:04 [Homme] You know, life is aboutfinding a cliff worth jumping off.
1516 01:24:08 I felt he was like, "I'm gonna lookfor something feral and wild."
1517 01:24:15 Perhaps that is something to do with age
1518 01:24:17 and all of a suddenfinding yourself alone.
1519 01:24:26 -This is called-- Why are you filming me?-Are you guys up?
1520 01:24:30 This is called "Our Wolf Ladyof the Wolf Flowers."
1521 01:24:33 Ah, that's great.You know, I have a John Lurie over my bed.
1522 01:24:38 [Lurie] I saw. No, you posted it.
1523 01:24:39 That was nice that you posted that.
1524 01:24:41 [Bourdain] No, I love it.It makes me very, very happy.
1525 01:24:44 -Does it?-Yes, it does.
1526 01:24:48 [Lurie] So he had a dark sense of humor.
1527 01:24:50 He wasn't Edgar Allan Poe.You know what I mean? He--
1528 01:24:53 There was a lot of light around him.There really was.
1529 01:24:55 Bring another one.
1530 01:24:57 No. I mean, especially, like,I'm away and I come back
1531 01:24:59 -and I walk into my room…-There it is, yeah.
1532 01:25:01 [Bourdain] It feels--The room vibrates at a frequency
1533 01:25:04 that makes me comfortable and happy.
1534 01:25:06 That's cool.
1535 01:25:14 Thank you. Eggs, the perfect food.
1536 01:25:16 -Thank you, sir.-Eat that.
1537 01:25:18 [Lurie] We were supposed to have lunch.
1538 01:25:20 And I said, "I want to go somewhere quiet
1539 01:25:22 where nobody knows us."
1540 01:25:24 And he just sort of stoppedin his tracks and said,
1541 01:25:26 "I'm becoming agoraphobic."
1542 01:25:31 And then I saw the pain in his face.
1543 01:25:37 Maybe he needed some time awayfrom it all to reflect a minute
1544 01:25:40 and then start again kind of thing,you know? I don't--
1545 01:25:44 It seemed like he was aboutto go on to something else.
1546 01:25:52 [Fallon] His life startedto feel smaller and smaller.
1547 01:25:54 He couldn't go as many places.
1548 01:25:56 He couldn't be out in public as much.
1549 01:25:59 I could see him whittle away.
1550 01:26:04 So, places like the empty quarterof the Arabian Desert
1551 01:26:09 started to really resonate for him.
1552 01:26:12 To just sit on the edge ofthe largest sand desert in the world
1553 01:26:18 and stare out into it…
1554 01:26:22 feeling like it's something
1555 01:26:24 that's bigger than him and not about him.
1556 01:26:30 He often talked about how,in an ideal world,
1557 01:26:33 he wouldn't be in the show.
1558 01:26:35 It would be his point of view,like a camera moving through space,
1559 01:26:39 without having to see him at all.
1560 01:26:59 [Bourdain] Travel isn't always pretty.
1561 01:27:02 You go away. You learn.
1562 01:27:04 You get scarred, marked,changed in the process.
1563 01:27:11 It even breaks your heart.
1564 01:27:37 [Tenaglia] He was very stressed
1565 01:27:39 and very weary and very exhausted.
1566 01:27:43 He did talk about quitting.
1567 01:27:47 It happened like a couple of years ago.
1568 01:27:50 He asked to see Chris and I at a bar.
1569 01:27:54 [Collins] It was very dramatic.
1570 01:27:56 He was, like, "I can't live my lifelike this anymore."
1571 01:28:00 "I'm done. I'm done with this.I'm done with you people.
1572 01:28:03 Every band comes to an end.
1573 01:28:05 It's time for us to break upand go our separate ways."
1574 01:28:07 [Collins] "You know,I've broken one family.
1575 01:28:10 I'm in this other relationshipthat I care very deeply about
1576 01:28:13 and I want to make it work."
1577 01:28:15 And Lydia looked at Tony and said,"Then go do it.
1578 01:28:19 Go do it. Don't sit hereand talk about it and whine.
1579 01:28:25 Get up and go. Leave.
1580 01:28:28 Move to Italy, set up.
1581 01:28:30 We will support you.We will be your friend. Go."
1582 01:28:33 [Tenaglia] "Like,if you're done with this, it's okay."
1583 01:28:36 I don't know. Maybe he wasexpecting us to, like,
1584 01:28:39 grab him and say, like, "No, don't go.
1585 01:28:42 It's not over. What can we do?"
1586 01:28:45 He couldn't move.
1587 01:28:49 It's really kind of sad.
1588 01:28:52 It's, like…
1589 01:28:54 "Then sit the fuck downand let's talk this thing through."
1590 01:28:58 And we said, "We'll figure outa way to make this thing work,
1591 01:29:00 you know, so it's good for you."
1592 01:29:08 [Bourdain] Okay. Here we go.
1593 01:29:11 "Hong Kong. To fall in love with Asia--"
1594 01:29:14 Oof, Asia. [chuckles]
1595 01:29:16 "To fall in love with Asia is one thing.
1596 01:29:20 To fall in love in Asia is another.
1597 01:29:22 Both have happened to me.
1598 01:29:24 It's a gift, a dream, a curse,
1599 01:29:27 the best thing, the happiest thing,
1600 01:29:30 yet also the loneliest thing in the world.
1601 01:29:33 I've been to Hong Kong many times before,
1602 01:29:36 but not like this."
1603 01:29:38 If I die before I'm 40 years old,
1604 01:29:41 that shoot probably hadsomething to do with it.
1605 01:29:43 At the last second,the director gets sick.
1606 01:29:47 -I had my gallbladder removed.-Michael's gallbladder, I swear to God.
1607 01:29:51 So, obviously I can't go,and then Tony immediately,
1608 01:29:53 like, sees an in.
1609 01:29:55 He gets them to all agreethat Asia should direct this.
1610 01:30:00 Well, like, okay.In some ways, on this side,
1611 01:30:05 this is giving him some kind of,like, intense resurgence
1612 01:30:09 of, like, creative energy.
1613 01:30:12 And so we ran with that.
1614 01:30:15 -Asia?-I think…
1615 01:30:16 Back in one sec.
1616 01:30:18 We're getting too much good stuffin too short a period of time.
1617 01:30:21 Let's move and-- and move. Yeah.
1618 01:30:23 We're getting too much.It's, like, at this point,
1619 01:30:27 to everybody, I'm thinking,"Stop saying so much great stuff."
1620 01:30:29 -[Asia] Oh, my God.-So happy.
1621 01:30:30 Food's ready. Asia, the food's ready.
1622 01:30:33 [chattering]
1623 01:30:35 [Cho] It seemed like so many years of us
1624 01:30:38 shaping and creating this thing,
1625 01:30:41 all of a sudden,was thrown out the window,
1626 01:30:44 and it was just, you know, anything goes.
1627 01:30:47 So, what is your--
1628 01:30:50 what is your hope?
1629 01:30:52 What do you hope will happento change your situation?
1630 01:30:54 To be honest, um,I'm not a big fan of hope.
1631 01:30:58 Um, hope is…
1632 01:31:00 Hold on one second. Let me reset.
1633 01:31:04 [Cho] In the middle of this heartfeltscene with these two asylum seekers,
1634 01:31:06 we're stopping…
1635 01:31:08 I hold my hand or hold the thought?
1636 01:31:10 …and telling them to hold their thoughtand to, like, redo it,
1637 01:31:12 as if we're filming a movie or something.
1638 01:31:15 [chattering]
1639 01:31:24 You know, breaking the natural,heartfelt conversations
1640 01:31:28 that are not easy conversations to have,
1641 01:31:31 he would have never, ever done that.
1642 01:31:36 [man] Let's go. Ready to go.
1643 01:31:38 [Bourdain] I'm sorry, do it again.
1644 01:31:42 Asia?
1645 01:31:47 [Collins] What happened in Hong Kong was--
1646 01:31:50 Listen.
1647 01:31:52 [sighs]
1648 01:31:54 We-- We were trying to help our friend.
1649 01:31:58 And if that meant…
1650 01:32:01 um…
1651 01:32:03 doing-- Yeah.
1652 01:32:12 [Bourdain] Of everythingI've done in my life,
1653 01:32:14 this was probablythe professional highlight.
1654 01:32:17 Between, uh, Asia Argento as the director
1655 01:32:20 and Christopher Doyleas the director of photography…
1656 01:32:23 -You're gonna give me a camera?-Hell yeah.
1657 01:32:25 …we really did something special.
1658 01:32:29 All right, proceed to smoke weed.
1659 01:32:37 I think I'm happy.
1660 01:32:43 [Doyle] Why? It's so peaceful?
1661 01:32:45 Yeah.
1662 01:32:48 This is the best shotin the movie, by the way.
1663 01:32:51 Wow, this is fucking beautiful.
1664 01:32:53 Wait.
1665 01:32:55 I don't smile a lot on this show,by the way, but I'm smiling now.
1666 01:33:01 I want to shoot you guys.
1667 01:33:03 So, tell us about your team.
1668 01:33:07 [Bourdain] Zach, 12-year veteran.
1669 01:33:13 [Steed] Zach had made Parts Unknown oneof the most beautiful shows on television.
1670 01:33:20 Tony's admiration for Zachwas just kind of mind-blowing.
1671 01:33:26 In Hong Kong, Zach hada differing opinion from Asia
1672 01:33:29 on what they were shooting.
1673 01:33:32 And despite having a huge historyand love and friendship, he was gone.
1674 01:33:38 [Cho] When Tony fired Zach,
1675 01:33:40 it was a huge red flag,because it was, like,
1676 01:33:44 if he's gonna do that to someone like him,
1677 01:33:46 I mean, anyone on the inner circle
1678 01:33:50 is essentially, you know, disposable.
1679 01:33:55 [Doyle]
1680 01:34:00 [laughs]
1681 01:34:06 [Doyle]
1682 01:34:12 Cheers.
1683 01:34:14 [laughter]
1684 01:34:16 [Collins] There wasa very sort of manic nature
1685 01:34:19 to what was going on in that last year,
1686 01:34:22 where the highs were very, very high.
1687 01:34:25 And the lows were very ugly.
1688 01:34:35 [Busia-Bourdain]He was not the same person.
1689 01:34:39 Something changed and became really heavy.
1690 01:34:43 But he started going to therapyat a certain point,
1691 01:34:48 and I thought, "I can take a step back.
1692 01:34:51 I don't have to be, like, you know,always so worried about him."
1693 01:34:55 And, uh--
1694 01:35:01 And I feel like that's somethingthat I will always,
1695 01:35:04 you know, feel like…
1696 01:35:08 I should have kept an eyeon him more, you know?
1697 01:35:17 [chattering]
1698 01:35:21 [man singing in Spanish]
1699 01:35:36 [Busia-Bourdain] He came by less and less.
1700 01:35:40 And we would see himonce a month, if we were lucky.
1701 01:35:47 [Chang] You know, he said some shit to methat was really-- fucking pissed me off.
1702 01:35:50 Um…
1703 01:35:53 You know, fuck it.
1704 01:35:55 You know, Tony saidI would never be a good dad.
1705 01:36:05 That fucking hurt.
1706 01:36:12 And I know he wasn't tryingto be mean, but…
1707 01:36:19 -[Neville] Was he projecting?-Yeah.
1708 01:36:20 Of course he was projecting.
1709 01:36:24 He did everything he could to be a dad.
1710 01:36:29 [sighs]
1711 01:36:31 I think it broke his heart
1712 01:36:32 that he couldn't be the fucking dadhe thought he could be,
1713 01:36:34 the romantic version of a dad.
1714 01:36:39 [Cho] He was such a romantic about life,
1715 01:36:41 about anything, about families,about life as a whole.
1716 01:36:47 Life was a romantic idea,
1717 01:36:49 and reality was never gonnalive up to exactly how he pictured it.
1718 01:36:56 He was always gonna sort ofset himself up for disappointment.
1719 01:37:08 Wow.
1720 01:37:10 There's a sense of, um,vastness that I'm not used to.
1721 01:37:15 Does this remind youof your cowboy movies?
1722 01:37:18 -Uh, a little bit.-Yeah.
1723 01:37:20 Yes, the lone gunman out for vengeance
1724 01:37:22 would be riding in a long shot over there.
1725 01:37:26 [Witherspoon] At that point, I thinkhe thought his relationship with Asia
1726 01:37:31 could provide him with an answer.
1727 01:37:33 -But anyway…-You're right, you're right.
1728 01:37:36 [Witherspoon] You know? His lovefor her was completely pure and safe
1729 01:37:41 and helpful and supportive.
1730 01:37:43 Which is essentially whathe was looking for from her.
1731 01:37:48 And I think that Tony concludedthat the way to earn her trust
1732 01:37:54 was just to go in with his whole heart.
1733 01:37:58 Please welcome Anthony Bourdain!
1734 01:38:00 [cheers, applause]
1735 01:38:06 One of the more painfuland I would think interesting journeys
1736 01:38:11 you've taken in your lifehappened just very recently
1737 01:38:13 with regards to the Me Too movement.
1738 01:38:14 I started speaking about itout of a sense of real rage.
1739 01:38:17 I mean, I'd like to say that I'm--I arrived at--
1740 01:38:21 I was always enlightened in some way
1741 01:38:24 or that I am an activist or virtuous.
1742 01:38:27 But, in fact, uh, you know,I have to be honest with myself.
1743 01:38:29 I met one extraordinary woman
1744 01:38:31 with an extraordinary and painful story.
1745 01:38:35 Uh, suddenly it was personal.
1746 01:38:37 I think it surprised a lot of people.
1747 01:38:39 He had never really wanted tostick himself out there for a cause.
1748 01:38:44 But Tony was like,"I'm going to make a stand."
1749 01:38:49 [Bourdain] A nuclear bomb is gonna fallon one of my worst enemies.
1750 01:38:54 Everybody's been defending him,but now he's going fucking down.
1751 01:38:58 He's going down big-fucking-time.
1752 01:39:02 In 1997, I was raped by Harvey Weinsteinhere at Cannes.
1753 01:39:09 And even tonight, sitting among you,
1754 01:39:13 there are those who stillhave to be held accountable
1755 01:39:16 for their conduct against women.
1756 01:39:20 [reporter] Argento later postedthis photo on Instagram
1757 01:39:23 with her fist in the air,
1758 01:39:24 the caption in French translated,"The battle of women continues."
1759 01:39:33 [Fallon] Asia had just come from Cannes.
1760 01:39:35 And then we're in the Uffizi Gallery
1761 01:39:37 looking at the beheading of Holofernes,
1762 01:39:39 which is literallythe beheading of her rapist,
1763 01:39:44 and it's happening the daythat Weinstein gets arrested.
1764 01:39:47 [reporter] Weinstein has repeatedlydenied all allegations.
1765 01:39:53 It was extraordinary.
1766 01:40:16 Everybody takes Medusaas the symbol of the evil woman
1767 01:40:21 with snakes in her head,
1768 01:40:23 but, uh, she was a rape victim.
1769 01:40:27 And she had to protect herself.
1770 01:40:30 You know, powerful, inconvenient womenwho piss people off
1771 01:40:34 are inevitably caricatured as Medusa.
1772 01:40:37 Yeah. I'm-- I'm next.
1773 01:40:40 I wasn't gonna say it.
1774 01:40:42 -It's only a matter of time.-Hmm.
1775 01:40:45 It's incredible.
1776 01:40:47 [crowd chanting]Me Too! Our stories are true!
1777 01:40:50 We say Me Too!
1778 01:40:52 [Busia-Bourdain] I mean, at first it was,like, very noble of him, you know?
1779 01:40:55 And it was a good cause.
1780 01:40:57 But then he became--
1781 01:40:59 Yeah, he became obsessed with it.
1782 01:41:01 You're talking about it in a waythat many people wouldn't.
1783 01:41:04 [Busia-Bourdain] To the point whereif a friend said something
1784 01:41:08 five years ago that would maybe…
1785 01:41:12 might be offensive to the Me Too cause,
1786 01:41:14 he would just, like,cut them out of his life.
1787 01:41:18 I'm pretty much Ming the Mercilesson this issue right now.
1788 01:41:22 [Cho] Friends and creative partners--he threw them under the bus
1789 01:41:25 without any sort of consultationor anything.
1790 01:41:29 I mean, there was not much nuancewhen it got to that point of his life.
1791 01:41:35 [Fallon] What I saw was him turnwhat was a lifelong addictive personality
1792 01:41:40 to another person.
1793 01:41:43 And that was extremely dangerous.
1794 01:41:51 He was acting like a kidwho didn't understand
1795 01:41:53 that you're gonna drive someone away
1796 01:41:55 if you just pile onand pile on and pile on.
1797 01:41:58 Yes. But--
1798 01:41:59 Really, the top ten hottest thingsyou've ever done is park in Rome.
1799 01:42:03 What, like-- She was like,"You could park here now,
1800 01:42:07 but in an hour you can't park here.We can get away with this now."
1801 01:42:10 I thought, "This isthe fucking coolest thing."
1802 01:42:12 [Fallon] He won't stop fucking talkingabout her ability to park.
1803 01:42:16 "You're such a good parker.
1804 01:42:18 You park so well. You park so well.You parallel park so well."
1805 01:42:20 And she's like, "Dude, I don't wantto be known for my parking skills."
1806 01:42:23 Like, you can see her pulling back,and he just won't stop.
1807 01:42:33 We're having so much fun.
1808 01:42:35 Done. And it was genius, bro.
1809 01:42:38 I'm telling you,see you at the Oscars, yo.
1810 01:42:40 Saying goodbye to him is the happiestI felt like I had ever seen him.
1811 01:42:46 Huge hugs.
1812 01:42:48 He was like, "I love you.
1813 01:42:49 I love working with you.We got years ahead of us.
1814 01:42:51 I'm looking forward to it."
1815 01:42:54 [chuckles]
1816 01:42:56 [bleating]
1817 01:43:06 [Tenaglia] You don't want his legacy
1818 01:43:08 to come off as, like, somebody who…
1819 01:43:12 succumbed to, like, this…
1820 01:43:18 darkness.
1821 01:43:22 That wasn't him.
1822 01:43:24 Like, he created somethingthat was so important.
1823 01:43:27 And I want--That really needs to be, like--
1824 01:43:32 That is the legacy of his life.
1825 01:43:35 Not this stupid bullshit actthat he did at the end.
1826 01:43:45 [Neville] How do we come to terms with…
1827 01:43:48 what happened?
1828 01:43:50 Hmm. That's something I don't speak about.
1829 01:44:00 [Steed] What happened in France.Um, where to start?
1830 01:44:05 The kind of scenes that we hadand what kind of shoot it was--
1831 01:44:08 you know, it was, like, Tony and Eric.
1832 01:44:10 Lighthearted, funny.
1833 01:44:12 -Um…-[all laughing]
1834 01:44:14 [Bourdain] Wow. Wow.
1835 01:44:16 -Listen, man. Listen.-And you mocked me.
1836 01:44:19 [Steed] We're probably,like, four days in.
1837 01:44:21 Tony arrives, and he is just…
1838 01:44:25 palpably sort of like just angry.
1839 01:44:28 And…
1840 01:44:30 the scene sort of-- It takes a dark turn.
1841 01:44:33 Uh, they're talking about dying,
1842 01:44:35 choking on a hot dogor something like that.
1843 01:44:38 He kind of looks back at me,and we kind of make eye contact.
1844 01:44:43 In my memory now, it's very desperate.
1845 01:44:52 I called Helen,and this tabloid shit's come out
1846 01:44:55 about Asia and this other person.
1847 01:45:02 Tony goes over to this balcony again,
1848 01:45:03 looking over this valley,and he's, like, smoking,
1849 01:45:05 and he's kind of alone.
1850 01:45:08 I go out there, and I'm like,"Hey, man, how are you doing?
1851 01:45:13 You know, is this just, like--
1852 01:45:14 Are these just tabloid people, like,fucking with you guys? What's happening?"
1853 01:45:17 And then, like, he pauses.
1854 01:45:21 And he just says,"A little fucking discretion."
1855 01:45:25 Right? And I was like,"Hey, man, I'm just--"
1856 01:45:28 He's like, "No, man, not you."
1857 01:45:30 It's like, "I don't want to have tofucking deal with these fucking--"
1858 01:45:34 You know, he's talking about Asia.
1859 01:45:40 He didn't even look at me.
1860 01:45:42 He's just kind of, like,just, you know, smoking
1861 01:45:44 and just sort of looking outand just like, "Fuck."
1862 01:45:48 I wish I had said more to himin that moment.
1863 01:45:55 [Choe] You know, Tony hasn't beenall right for a long time.
1864 01:45:58 The amount that he joked aboutthe end of his life and--
1865 01:46:03 He's been chasing that shit forever.
1866 01:46:05 [Bourdain] Potato chips are stale.
1867 01:46:07 So depressed right now,I feel like killing myself.
1868 01:46:11 [Choe] He's a fucking runner.I mean, he ran for a long time,
1869 01:46:14 but you're not gonna outsmart pain.
1870 01:46:18 I'm pretty sure that polewill support my body weight.
1871 01:46:22 -What?-If I fucking hang myself.
1872 01:46:27 [Lurie] I think it pops into a lot ofpeople's heads, and it's just like,
1873 01:46:31 since he knew how to do it--
1874 01:46:34 I mean, I don't know.
1875 01:46:36 He's a storyteller, for one thing.
1876 01:46:38 How does a storyteller check outwithout leaving a note?
1877 01:46:43 [Cho] But I think, in some regard,
1878 01:46:45 he was gonna write his end,which is what he did.
1879 01:46:50 If you look at his last Instagram Story,
1880 01:46:52 he played the title sequence musicfrom this '70s film, Violent City.
1881 01:46:58 And if you've seen the film,you know that the beginning
1882 01:47:01 is a series of paparazzi photosof this couple.
1883 01:47:05 I mean, it's a revenge film.
1884 01:47:07 It's about this woman who betrays himand him seeking revenge.
1885 01:47:13 [dramatic theme music playing]
1886 01:47:28 I mean, it's-- it's all there.
1887 01:47:34 I'm very cautious to be like--blame the woman for, like, you know--
1888 01:47:38 or blame the lover or blame the husband.
1889 01:47:40 You know, Tony killed himself.
1890 01:47:44 Tony did it.
1891 01:47:52 [Chris Bourdain]My brother committed suicide.
1892 01:47:54 I think if somebody elsehad been in his room,
1893 01:47:56 it might've been a murderand not a suicide.
1894 01:47:58 I think he was just in an explosive anger
1895 01:47:59 and this was the only way out.
1896 01:48:04 [man] When you chooseto hang yourself, it's a torture.
1897 01:48:08 Self-imposed torture.
1898 01:48:14 [Chang] If he was fucking drunk,it'd be a lot easier to understand.
1899 01:48:17 The toxicology reportwas he was clean and sober.
1900 01:48:22 I think it was a clear decision.
1901 01:48:27 [Witherspoon] It was a momentary lapse,
1902 01:48:28 and I don't thinkhe weighed the pros and cons.
1903 01:48:33 If he had just made it throughthat night, you know?
1904 01:48:38 [Rinaldi] We're trying so hardto understand,
1905 01:48:40 because we think if we can understand it,then we'll be okay with it.
1906 01:48:43 And the fact of the matter is, no,I don't think we get to know.
1907 01:48:48 We don't get to know.
1908 01:48:50 That's tough.
1909 01:48:55 [sniffles]
1910 01:49:00 [Choe] Well, I don't knowwhere he is right now, but…
1911 01:49:03 he let me down.
1912 01:49:05 He--
1913 01:49:08 [sobbing]
1914 01:49:11 [Mosshart] I don't thinkhe was cruel, you know?
1915 01:49:13 And there's, like, a cruelty to that.
1916 01:49:19 What the hell is everyone supposed to do?
1917 01:49:21 [distant chanting]
1918 01:49:50 [Witherspoon] It's been over two yearssince he took his own life,
1919 01:49:55 and I still experiencea range of emotions.
1920 01:49:59 Um…
1921 01:50:03 God.
1922 01:50:07 [exhales deeply]
1923 01:50:12 It's like…
1924 01:50:14 I haven't fucking cut my hairsince he died.
1925 01:50:16 Like, I--
1926 01:50:19 I just miss him.
1927 01:50:22 [Ripert] I miss a friend, a dear friend.
1928 01:50:26 I think about a lot of happy momentswe had together.
1929 01:50:35 Mostly, yeah.
1930 01:50:41 [Lajaunie] I was in Vietnamon a beautiful day.
1931 01:50:44 I looked at my phone,and there was the news.
1932 01:50:50 And, uh, that's when I decidedto move to Vietnam for good.
1933 01:50:53 Pfft. That was the--It was not even a thought.
1934 01:50:57 It was the door opened,and I had to go through it
1935 01:51:01 and start doing something new.
1936 01:51:07 [Steed] I was listening to this recordthat brought me to tears thinking of him.
1937 01:51:11 And, um, both my kids sort of embraced me.
1938 01:51:17 My son, he's like, "How did Tony die?"
1939 01:51:22 And I was like, "Uh, I-- We don't know."
1940 01:51:24 Right?
1941 01:51:26 About 20 seconds pass,and he looked at me and he's like,
1942 01:51:30 "I really would like to knowhow Tony died."
1943 01:51:32 I have this, like,hour-long conversation about Tony
1944 01:51:37 to my fucking seven-year-old kid.
1945 01:51:39 And I said, "I think Tony, at the end,
1946 01:51:43 felt alone and felthe couldn't talk to anybody
1947 01:51:48 about the pain that wasgoing on inside of him."
1948 01:51:52 And I said, "You knowyou always have someone
1949 01:51:55 to turn to and talk to."
1950 01:51:58 That's the lesson in it for me.
1951 01:52:05 [Homme]It's plenty to just say, "I'm hurt."
1952 01:52:08 I haven't worked for two years now.
1953 01:52:12 Really close to the end,we talked, and I said,
1954 01:52:16 "Got to take our girlsand lighten the load
1955 01:52:19 and show them the world,show them who we are,
1956 01:52:21 not just when you come home, but--"
1957 01:52:23 And we were both excitedabout this prospect.
1958 01:52:32 Fuck.
1959 01:52:34 One, two, three.
1960 01:52:39 When I get angry is when I thinkabout leaving behind a brilliant…
1961 01:52:45 daughter.
1962 01:52:49 You know.
1963 01:52:52 He would have loved to bearound now, to see her now.
1964 01:52:56 He'd be so proud of her.
1965 01:53:05 [Busia-Bourdain] I'm so lucky
1966 01:53:06 'cause she's the best daughterI could hope for.
1967 01:53:11 And I will always be gratefulthat, you know,
1968 01:53:14 Tony gave her to me, you know?
1969 01:53:17 [chattering]
1970 01:53:22 I mean, I think this is the last timeI'll ever talk publicly about it,
1971 01:53:27 because I-- That's not the wayI want to remember him.
1972 01:53:31 I want to remember himwhen we were together,
1973 01:53:34 all the amazing things that we'd done
1974 01:53:36 and the amazing person that he was.
1975 01:53:44 [Chris Bourdain] After Tony died,
1976 01:53:45 the restaurant, Les Halles,it just became this shrine.
1977 01:53:51 We didn't realize he meant so muchto so many people.
1978 01:53:57 "You inspired meto get out of my comfort zone
1979 01:53:59 and fearlessly immerse myselfin the richness of life."
1980 01:54:04 "Advocate for the working classes,the immigrants, the poor.
1981 01:54:07 This world didn't deserve you."
1982 01:54:12 And then a few people left poems.
1983 01:54:14 One said, "Everyone forgetsthat Icarus also flew.
1984 01:54:18 I believe Icaruswas not failing as he fell,
1985 01:54:21 but just coming to the endof his triumph."
1986 01:54:45 You know, I was an angry young man.
1987 01:54:47 I, uh…
1988 01:54:50 I forget what I was angry about,especially looking at this.
1989 01:54:54 What the hell was I so angry about?
1990 01:54:55 This was, you know…
1991 01:54:59 paradise.
1992 01:55:17 Sorry.
1993 01:55:20 Can I say something?
1994 01:55:22 To have him walking down a beach,it resonates, it's sweet.
1995 01:55:26 And I go, you know, as I was upstairsusing the restroom, I was like…
1996 01:55:31 "He would fucking hate that."
1997 01:55:33 [rock music playing]
1998 01:55:39 Going out in a blaze of glorywas so fucking lame.
1999 01:55:44 But we live in this society
2000 01:55:46 where every great artistwho kills themselves is on murals
2001 01:55:50 and they're talked about like gods.
2002 01:55:51 -[Neville] Tony's on murals.-Yeah. That's--
2003 01:55:53 Around town, there are a couple of them.
2004 01:55:55 I should go deface them.
2005 01:55:57 He would love it if I did that.
2006 01:55:59 I got your written invitation
2007 01:56:02 A beautiful stick in the eye
2008 01:56:06 I get the message
2009 01:56:08 You been sending
2010 01:56:09 Ain't no good in goodbye
2011 01:56:12 Throw everything away
2012 01:56:16 Anything can be replaced
2013 01:56:19 Black and blue is the best I can do…
2014 01:56:25 Ooh.
2015 01:56:27 Yeah.
2016 01:56:31 Want to?
2017 01:56:33 Oh, what a pain in the asp
2018 01:56:36 For endless love and devotion
2019 01:56:40 Indian gifts of the past
2020 01:56:43 Just another drop on the ocean
2021 01:56:45 Empty space, empty heart
2022 01:56:49 Where the love
2023 01:56:52 Is not anymore
2024 01:56:54 So
2025 01:57:50 Living in limbo, kisses akimbo
2026 01:57:54 Every single bridge is on fire
2027 01:57:57 Hold me together? No way, never
2028 01:58:00 Due date done expired
2029 01:58:03 Second chances are a waste
2030 01:58:07 I'm gonna bend until I break
2031 01:58:10 Black and blue is the best I can do
2032 01:58:16 Yeah, black and blue and broken in two
2033 01:58:20 Whoa, whoa
2034 01:58:21 Want to?