被抹去的男孩(Boy Erased)(EN)Subtitles
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1 00:00:37 Jared!Why are you upset, honey?
2 00:00:41 I want my jersey.
3 00:00:42 Well, it's because it's dirty.
4 00:00:44 I want it.
5 00:00:50 You know, today is yourfirst day at school.
6 00:00:53 What?
7 00:00:56 You like to playsomething in particular?
8 00:00:58 Uh, soccer.
9 00:01:00 You like to play soccer.And?
10 00:01:02 And basketball!
11 00:01:04 What's your favorite color?
12 00:01:06 Uh...
13 00:01:08 Uh, blue and yellow.
14 00:01:10 - Blue...- And yellow.
15 00:01:12 And yellow.
16 00:01:14 What would you like to bewhen you grow up?
17 00:01:17 Motorcycle driver!
18 00:01:25 Bye! Hi!
19 00:01:35 Jared. You shouldcome down for breakfast.
20 00:01:49 I wish none of thishad ever happened.
21 00:01:54 But sometimes,I thank God that it did.
22 00:03:08 Please, repeat after me.Let your light shine.
23 00:03:11 Let your light shine.
24 00:03:13 Now, let me seea show of hands
25 00:03:14 for those of you in this roomwho are imperfect.
26 00:03:18 Everybody.
27 00:03:20 That's right.
28 00:03:21 And a show of hands for everybodyin this room who is perfect.
29 00:03:26 - Nobody.- Amen.
30 00:03:29 I am blessed with abeautiful and deeply soulful wife.
31 00:03:34 And with a fine, upstanding,
32 00:03:39 and honest son.
33 00:03:41 I'm a lucky man.
34 00:03:43 And I'm gratefulfor those blessings.
35 00:03:58 Please don't do that.You know that makes me nervous.
36 00:04:02 What if a truck comes alongand hits your arm?
37 00:04:04 - It's never gonna happen.- It's happened before.
38 00:04:07 It has. It has.
39 00:04:41 Good morning.Welcome to Love in Action.
40 00:04:43 Hi.
41 00:04:44 Name?
42 00:04:46 Uh, Nancy Eamons.
43 00:04:49 Oh, um, the boy, I mean.
44 00:04:52 - Unless you're the one checking in.- Jared Eamons.
45 00:04:56 Got you right here.
46 00:05:05 Great. Do you wantto say your goodbyes?
47 00:05:08 Can I see the place?
48 00:05:09 I'm afraid you won't be allowed beyondthe reception area, Mrs. Eamons,
49 00:05:12 - but you can pick him up at 5:00 p.m.- Oh.
50 00:05:14 Okay.
51 00:05:17 It's okay, Mom.
52 00:05:24 Well, call me any time.I'll be at the hotel on my cell phone.
53 00:05:27 Uh, we will beholding his cell phone.
54 00:05:30 If there are any emergencies,we will contact you.
55 00:05:32 But otherwise, 5:00 p.m.
56 00:05:41 You'll do great.
57 00:05:45 Love you.
58 00:05:49 Newbie. Eamons.
59 00:05:53 Empty your pockets.
60 00:06:04 Do you have any numbers or photoswe should be concerned about?
61 00:06:08 We'll check it daily and callany number at random,
62 00:06:10 so you best be straightwith us on that.
63 00:06:13 There's nothing. And, yeah,call whatever numbers if you need to.
64 00:06:18 "Sobriety.No smoking, no alcohol or drugs."
65 00:06:23 "Off hours. All clients to remainwithin a safe zone area as designated."
66 00:06:28 "Attire. Women's skirtsmust extend below the knee
67 00:06:32 "and bras are to be wornat all times."
68 00:06:33 What's that?
69 00:06:34 - Oh, it's, um...- I write stories.
70 00:06:38 I'm studying in a college...
71 00:06:40 No journaling. We're gonnahave to read that.
72 00:06:43 "Confidentiality.
73 00:06:44 "All matters discussed intherapy are to remain private."
74 00:06:48 "Restrooms.
75 00:06:50 "Members must be supervised bystaff during restroom visits."
76 00:06:53 - Your handbook.- Oh, yeah.
77 00:06:57 Good luck.
78 00:06:59 Thank you.
79 00:07:00 "No viewing of pornographicmaterial, no masturbation,
80 00:07:03 "no physical contactwith any member at any time,
81 00:07:06 "apart from the briefestof handshakes."
82 00:07:40 Michael for Aaron,
83 00:07:41 how many clientsare we expecting today?
84 00:07:43 Copy, Michael.Hold, please.
85 00:07:45 Uh, just one second, Jared.
86 00:07:47 We should have 11 today.
87 00:07:50 Well, we have morein the lobby.
88 00:07:52 It's okay.We should get another five minutes.
89 00:07:54 Copy.
90 00:07:55 Jared, if you just want to gofind yourself a seat
91 00:07:57 and then make yourself comfortable.We'll get started soon.
92 00:08:06 - Hi.- Hi.
93 00:08:16 Morning.
94 00:08:18 Hi.
95 00:08:19 "Sinful, salacious,and extraneous materials.
96 00:08:22 "All reading materialand films and television
97 00:08:25 "are off limitswhile inside the program."
98 00:08:30 I am using sexual sin and homosexuality
99 00:08:35 to fill a God-shaped voidin my life.
100 00:08:38 I am using sexual sinand homosexuality
101 00:08:42 to fill a God-shaped voidin my life.
102 00:08:44 But I am not broken,and God loves me.
103 00:08:48 But I am not broken,and God loves me.
104 00:08:51 Good.That is very true.
105 00:08:53 Now somebody tell mewhat this is.
106 00:08:58 A dollar.
107 00:09:00 A dollar.
108 00:09:02 Now, no matter how muchyou crumple up a dollar bill,
109 00:09:05 you can nevertake away its value.
110 00:09:09 Now even ifyou were to rip it,
111 00:09:12 which would representour being severed from Christ,
112 00:09:15 well, guess what?
113 00:09:17 You can alwaystape it back together.
114 00:09:20 Jesus puts us back together.
115 00:09:23 And even though there is a scar,our value does not change.
116 00:09:28 - You are somebody.- Sorry.
117 00:09:30 You are worth something.That's okay, Jon. Sit down.
118 00:09:33 And that is a fact.Don't spend it all at once, Phillip.
119 00:09:36 Now, this may be the toughest,but most rewarding
120 00:09:39 12 days that many of youwill ever face.
121 00:09:42 But we have just one task,
122 00:09:44 to bring ourselvesback to God.
123 00:09:48 To invite him back in.
124 00:09:50 To understand how hetruly meant to create us
125 00:09:52 before all those piecesgot torn away.
126 00:09:55 Now, look, I know the road herewasn't easy for many of you.
127 00:09:59 But I promise a smoother ridenow that you're here.
128 00:10:02 Because we are about to go onan amazing journey together.
129 00:10:08 So, who's ready?
130 00:10:12 That was a question.Who's ready? Say amen!
131 00:10:15 Amen.
132 00:10:16 Amen!If you know you're worth a dollar, say amen!
133 00:10:19 Amen!
134 00:10:22 Welcome to theRefuge program! Come on!
135 00:10:26 That's right, great souls!Great!
136 00:10:40 Now, I'm gonnatell you something
137 00:10:41 that's gonna make you immediatelyfeel a little better.
138 00:10:44 People tell you you can be born gay,that's not true.
139 00:10:47 You cannot be born a homosexual,this is a lie.
140 00:10:51 Now, I'm a counselor and a pastor,but was I born that way?
141 00:10:56 No.
142 00:10:58 It's behavioral.It's a choice.
143 00:11:02 Cameron, you,you, uh, play football? Yeah?
144 00:11:06 - Yeah.- Were you born that way?
145 00:11:09 - No.- No.
146 00:11:10 Now, you chose to bea football player, right?
147 00:11:14 It's behavior.
148 00:11:15 Now, if you...If Cameron stops playing football,
149 00:11:17 he no longeris a football player.
150 00:11:19 We gotta learn for ourselveswhere behavior comes from
151 00:11:22 so we can cut it out
152 00:11:24 and then we can no longerbe labeled that way.
153 00:11:27 Now, who can tell uswhat a genogram is?
154 00:11:30 Phillip.
155 00:11:31 - Well, a genogram is like a family tree...- Mmm.
156 00:11:34 ...only one that shows patternsof family behavior as well.
157 00:11:37 Sort of likean illustrated one.
158 00:11:39 Yes. Now, we aregoing to draw our family tree
159 00:11:43 and we're gonna list next to thesepeople their behavioral sin.
160 00:11:47 So, they made us
161 00:11:51 and they labeled us,so we're gonna label them.
162 00:11:53 Michael, can you readthe behavioral sins?
163 00:11:58 We use the letters SSA or H
164 00:12:01 to label same sex attractionor homosexuality,
165 00:12:05 D for drugs,
166 00:12:08 a dollar sign for gambling,
167 00:12:10 A, alcoholism,
168 00:12:13 P, promiscuity,
169 00:12:16 M, mental illness,
170 00:12:19 capital A, lowercase Bfor abortion,
171 00:12:22 capital P, lowercase Ofor pornography,
172 00:12:25 and C or G,criminal or gang affiliation.
173 00:12:28 You're forgetting DV,domestic violence.
174 00:12:31 Capital D,lowercase V, domestic violence.
175 00:12:35 Okay.Guys, let's dive right in.
176 00:12:37 Let's grab some cardsand some markers.
177 00:12:40 I want you to write them down
178 00:12:43 and put the lettersnext to their names.
179 00:12:45 I know they're family,
180 00:12:47 but I can guarantee thatone or some of these people
181 00:12:50 are the reasonthat you're at Love in Action.
182 00:12:55 So, Jared, you must bethe preacher's son.
183 00:12:59 You know or you don't know.
184 00:13:02 What's the question mark for?
185 00:13:05 Uncle Chris is an alcoholic.
186 00:13:10 Hmm.
187 00:13:12 Well, this must be prettytough on your family, huh?
188 00:13:16 Give ear,O my people, to my law.
189 00:13:19 Incline your earsto the words of my mouth.
190 00:13:22 I will open my mouthin a parable.
191 00:13:25 I will utter dark sayingswhich we have heard.
192 00:13:28 No.
193 00:13:29 Sounds good, Dad.
194 00:13:31 Are you ready?We gotta get going.
195 00:13:33 Why are wegoing to Dallas tomorrow?
196 00:13:36 Architect's updated the, uh,remodel plans for the ministry.
197 00:13:38 Now we're gonna take a tour oftwo similar churches right there.
198 00:13:45 Do you think I could stay atChloe's when you go instead?
199 00:13:52 It's okay,I can stay at Wayne's.
200 00:13:53 - Or... Or, I'll just...- I'm okay with that.
201 00:13:56 In fact, I thinkit is a great idea.
202 00:13:59 You're both mature kids whoknow how to conduct themselves
203 00:14:03 and who by now knowhow the world works.
204 00:14:06 You know, son, small steps toward manhood.That's the way to learn.
205 00:14:13 That way you don't get allpanicky when it suddenly arrives.
206 00:14:18 You do knowwhat I'm saying, Romeo?
207 00:14:20 - Yes, sir.- Okay.
208 00:14:22 Let's go, we're late.
209 00:14:23 Dear Heavenly Father,we thank you for this beautiful day
210 00:14:26 and, Lord, we pray thatyou look over our shoulder
211 00:14:29 as we march out onto the floor
212 00:14:31 and that we show our customers thelove and kindness that you show us.
213 00:14:35 In Jesus Christ's nameand for his sake...
214 00:14:37 Morning!Let your light shine!
215 00:14:39 - Amen.- Amen.
216 00:14:41 - All right.- Have a great day.
217 00:14:50 Rebels on three.One, two, three...
218 00:14:53 Rebels!
219 00:14:58 You did so good.
220 00:15:01 Right, buddy? Assists, one of the mostunderrated components of the game.
221 00:15:05 - Congratulations.- I saw you setting up all the points.
222 00:15:08 - Oh, that's victory sweat.- Dad, I'm...
223 00:15:09 - Yeah!- I played, like, five minutes.
224 00:15:11 - Hey.- I think you played more than that.
225 00:15:13 How about you?Another underrated component of the game.
226 00:15:15 - Thank you. How are you?- Congratulations, beautiful girl.
227 00:15:17 I was worried about you.I thought they were going to drop you.
228 00:15:19 Oh, no,don't worry.
229 00:15:21 You kids goingto go celebrate?
230 00:15:22 Yeah, some of us,I think we're gonna go to the lake.
231 00:15:25 All right. The lake.
232 00:15:28 All right. Dealership's going to putme in an Expedition, so it's yours.
233 00:15:33 Wow.
234 00:15:35 - Dad!- All right.
235 00:15:37 It's gonna befor your birthday,
236 00:15:39 but tonight's a good night,so congratulations.
237 00:15:41 - Thank you so much. Thank you.- Go and have fun.
238 00:15:43 I want to see if your mamawants to go to the lake.
239 00:16:23 They're still up.
240 00:16:42 What?
241 00:16:49 If it's not hard,I can make it hard.
242 00:16:52 Don't you think we should wait until,you know...
243 00:16:55 Until...
244 00:16:57 - You know...- Until what? We get married?
245 00:17:03 That's what my parents thinkwe should do.
246 00:17:07 To keep us togetherthrough college.
247 00:17:17 Hey.
248 00:17:20 Is something wrong?
249 00:17:23 No.
250 00:17:27 Jared.
251 00:17:30 Ready to pack it up?We're about done for the day. Looks nice.
252 00:17:35 5:00, everyone!It's home time.
253 00:17:38 - Bye.- 5:00, let's go!
254 00:17:44 All right, everybody,pack it up.
255 00:17:48 Name tag.
256 00:17:51 - Thanks.- 9:00 a.m. tomorrow.
257 00:18:00 Uh...
258 00:18:02 Hey,you tore out the pages.
259 00:18:05 - Mmm.- They're just stories.
260 00:18:07 Mr. Sykes will decide that.
261 00:18:10 For Michael.
262 00:18:12 Go for Michael.
263 00:18:14 Are you still in the office?
264 00:18:36 Are you... Are you a soldier?Were you in the military or something?
265 00:18:40 - I saw you salute earlier.- No.
266 00:18:44 - I'm trying zero contact whatsoever.- Mmm.
267 00:18:46 Twenty-three days now.
268 00:18:49 So, I salute instead.
269 00:18:55 This group seems good.
270 00:18:58 Have you been here before?
271 00:19:00 Yeah, it's my second timein the Refuge program.
272 00:19:03 I started a couple days latelast time.
273 00:19:05 And actually, I'm waiting for aplace to open in one of the houses.
274 00:19:09 - What houses?- The houses.
275 00:19:12 They have a few houses behind theproperty for the long stayers.
276 00:19:15 Meanwhile, I'm stuckat the Baybrook with my dad,
277 00:19:19 which is interesting.
278 00:19:24 - Are you in one of the local hotels, too?- Yeah.
279 00:19:31 So, like, how longwill you stay for?
280 00:19:36 It's not really up to me.Mr. Sykes decides.
281 00:19:40 - No one explained that to you?- No, no.
282 00:19:44 This is just an assessment program,until they know what to do with you.
283 00:19:50 Hey, listen.Just lean into it, man.
284 00:19:55 Yeah.
285 00:19:56 Do the workand trust me, man,
286 00:20:00 you're gonna love it here.
287 00:20:02 Aren't you gonnatell me about your day?
288 00:20:05 We're not meant to talkabout it outside of group.
289 00:20:08 I don't need gossip, I just...I just mean generally.
290 00:20:13 I'm gonna lean into it
291 00:20:16 and there aresome good people.
292 00:20:17 And, yeah, I like it.
293 00:20:19 - I'm excited to be here.- That's good!
294 00:20:31 Do we have people in the family whohad issues with any of this stuff?
295 00:20:47 - Pornography?- Mom...
296 00:20:56 Drugs? Gang affiliation.
297 00:20:59 Gang affiliations?What is this?
298 00:21:01 I need to know for homework.
299 00:21:03 Why do they need to knowabout the family?
300 00:21:06 Our family is so normal.
301 00:21:36 Big day tomorrow, hmm?
302 00:21:39 You get some good sleep, now.
303 00:21:45 Oh, um, I filled outyour homework for you.
304 00:21:53 I was only in a gang for a year orso until I went down for drugs.
305 00:21:58 Got sent to prison.
306 00:22:00 Haha!
307 00:22:08 I put your Uncle Vincentdown there.
308 00:22:11 You've never met him because he moved toLouisiana when you were little, so...
309 00:22:16 We just never see him.
310 00:22:18 We always figured that he...
311 00:22:27 He was very feminine-like,you might say.
312 00:22:32 All right. Oh, I'm tired.
313 00:22:37 - Night night.- Good night.
314 00:22:48 What is a real man?
315 00:22:52 What doesa real man look like?
316 00:22:55 Does anybody know?
317 00:22:58 Guys, uncross your legs.Posture, come on.
318 00:23:02 Now, perhaps being closeto the flames of hell
319 00:23:07 and finding your way backshows a great strength.
320 00:23:12 And if that were so, then,
321 00:23:14 if this isn't a real man,then I don't know what is.
322 00:23:17 This is Brandon Ellis, guys.I want you to say hello.
323 00:23:20 - Thanks, Sykes.- Make him welcome.
324 00:23:21 Over to you, Brandon.
325 00:23:25 God bless, God bless.
326 00:23:28 A real man to me is a manof God first and foremost
327 00:23:32 and I'm a man of God,no doubt.
328 00:23:35 I guess that counts me in.
329 00:23:38 But I wasn't once.
330 00:23:41 If I was ever listedon my own son's genograms,
331 00:23:44 there'd be so many of these lettersnext to my name it would look like
332 00:23:47 qualifications for some fancy university.
333 00:23:51 Drugs, violence,gang crime, prison time,
334 00:23:54 but I actually believeI'm qualified to be here.
335 00:23:57 Not because I've ever had thetypes of thoughts and feelings
336 00:24:01 that y'all are wrestling with,
337 00:24:02 or that your other guidancecounselors have overcome righteously.
338 00:24:06 But I've had all sorts of my own trialsthat took me so far away from the Lord
339 00:24:11 that it's a true miracle that I'mstanding here before you today.
340 00:24:16 But I am. I am.
341 00:24:25 Standing, leaning, sitting.
342 00:24:29 All the same idea.
343 00:24:30 Triangles arethe strongest shape.
344 00:24:33 Remember, hands on hips. Go!
345 00:24:37 Save yourself.
346 00:24:42 Fingers forward, not back.Just the way it is.
347 00:24:45 Think of the shapes you'remaking and ask yourself,
348 00:24:49 "Is this a manly shape I'm making oris it a girly or feminine shape?"
349 00:24:55 Sarah, come on up here.
350 00:24:58 Come on,you delicate flower, you.
351 00:25:00 Okay.
352 00:25:02 I want you to arrangethese guys into a line
353 00:25:05 in terms of masculinity,if you will.
354 00:25:09 Go on, you can do it.
355 00:25:12 Follow your instincts.
356 00:25:16 Myself and other addicts andalcoholics put our faith in AA.
357 00:25:21 Get familiar with this phrase,"Fake it till you make it."
358 00:25:26 Y'all folks and kids beingwhat you're afflicted with,
359 00:25:30 you gotta learnhow to survive.
360 00:25:33 When you're in prison,
361 00:25:34 you'd surprise yourselfwhat you can do to fit in.
362 00:25:37 Come on, Phillip.Eye on the ball.
363 00:25:40 Come on! Okay, next.
364 00:25:42 Fake it till you make it.Become the man you are not.
365 00:25:45 So, you think Cameron here is the big winner,huh?
366 00:25:50 You think being big and tall
367 00:25:52 and overeating immediately putsa guy at the front of the line.
368 00:25:56 But it's more than trianglesand postures and genetics.
369 00:26:01 A firm handshake...Let's go! Do it!
370 00:26:04 Gotta pick up the bat.
371 00:26:07 Hold the bat up!
372 00:26:10 Get back up on that horse!
373 00:26:12 All right, just get himout of there.
374 00:26:16 Lee, you're gonna be okay.
375 00:26:19 Jared, you're up next.
376 00:26:22 Good.
377 00:26:28 Military man.God bless, son.
378 00:26:31 Who you are on the inside canbe affected by the outside.
379 00:26:36 Outside in, fake it till you make it,adapt to survive.
380 00:26:41 See, that's a batting stance.That's what I'm talking about.
381 00:26:45 Boom!
382 00:26:58 Lesbian, gay, bisexual,transsexual, whatever that is,
383 00:27:04 multisexual, intellectual-sexual,I mean, what else do you want?
384 00:27:08 Unicorns? Squirrels? Cupcakes? I mean, rainbows?
385 00:27:13 There's so much choicein this group.
386 00:27:16 But, hey, think about this.What are the consequences to those choices?
387 00:27:24 Have a look at this.Rape, abuse, AIDS.
388 00:27:29 What sinful thingshave y'all done?
389 00:27:36 Moral inventory.
390 00:27:39 Catalogue your sinsand ask God's forgiveness.
391 00:27:46 Who's ready?
392 00:27:51 Sarah!
393 00:28:06 "I would look at other girlsin the changing rooms before gym
394 00:28:10 "and in the showers.
395 00:28:12 "My biggest sin is onethat I am also thankful for
396 00:28:15 "because it has led meto Love in Action."
397 00:28:19 Doing well, Sarah.Carry on.
398 00:28:25 "I had run awayfrom my uncle's house
399 00:28:28 "and stayed with some girls Iknew whose parents were away.
400 00:28:32 "It was there that I finallyacted on my homosexual thoughts."
401 00:28:39 Come on, Sarah.
402 00:28:42 "I let a girl touch my...
403 00:28:44 "Kiss my...
404 00:28:46 "My vagina."
405 00:28:50 Nobody's judging, come on.
406 00:28:52 "And put her fingersinside me and I did the same.
407 00:28:58 "I renounce thesesinful thoughts and actions
408 00:29:01 "and ask God to forgive meall these things."
409 00:29:06 Very good.
410 00:29:09 We love you, Sarah.
411 00:29:10 Repeat after me.We love you, Sarah.
412 00:29:14 - We love you, Sarah.- Very good.
413 00:29:36 - Do you want some water?- I'm fine, thanks.
414 00:29:41 - Can I get you anything else?- I'm... I'm fine, thank you.
415 00:29:45 How dare youhumiliate a child like that!
416 00:29:50 Is that what you guys do?You like that?
417 00:29:52 You like doing that?You like humiliating and abusing children?
418 00:29:55 - It's not easy.- What do you mean it's not easy?
419 00:29:58 - Lee's parents.- His parents are here.
420 00:30:00 Listen to yourself.
421 00:30:01 With respect,we are not running a holiday camp here.
422 00:30:04 We paid you $3,000.I should report you.
423 00:30:07 - You could have given him a concussion.- David, let's go.
424 00:30:09 But thischange doesn't come easy.
425 00:30:12 Unbelievable!
426 00:30:27 Do you all find the reasony'all are here is funny?
427 00:30:31 Look at y'all!
428 00:30:33 People!
429 00:30:35 I'm trying to help you.
430 00:30:36 So, do not waste my time.
431 00:30:38 Nobody is to discuss thetherapy outside these walls.
432 00:30:42 Do I make myself clear?
433 00:31:36 Here.I got you, pal.
434 00:31:38 - Oh, sorry, sorry.- I got that.
435 00:31:39 Thank you so much.
436 00:31:41 Which, uh...Which room you in?
437 00:31:43 I'm in, uh, 317.
438 00:31:46 I'm in 237. You run?
439 00:31:49 - Yeah.- I figure.
440 00:31:50 - People who run know about Asics, right?- Oh, yeah.
441 00:31:54 Here. This is me.
442 00:32:05 First one in gets to choose.
443 00:32:12 You got a girl?
444 00:32:14 If so, you might want to think aboutapplying for a room without bunks.
445 00:32:18 Just broke up.
446 00:32:20 Oh.
447 00:32:21 That's perfect timingfor college.
448 00:32:26 We're a good fit.
449 00:32:28 Hate running with slowpokes.
450 00:32:30 I tell you what,I race you on the way back.
451 00:32:33 Last one back has to goto the other one's church.
452 00:32:35 Why?What kind of church is it?
453 00:32:38 You game or not?
454 00:32:40 Okay.
455 00:32:41 - One, two, three, go!- Two, three, go!
456 00:33:09 - Jared.- Hey, man. Nice to meet you.
457 00:33:57 You say your roommate'snot back till tomorrow?
458 00:34:00 He's on some golf trip.
459 00:34:06 Do you want to crash?
460 00:34:10 Uh, maybe.
461 00:34:31 Good night.
462 00:34:33 Good night.
463 00:35:26 Can't sleep, huh?
464 00:35:43 Probably shouldn't runso late at night.
465 00:36:04 You okay?
466 00:36:08 Yeah.
467 00:36:12 Yeah, just...
468 00:37:01 It's okay.
469 00:37:07 It's okay.
470 00:37:27 Hey, it's okay. It's okay.
471 00:37:31 Wait, wait.
472 00:37:35 No.
473 00:37:41 Stop, stop, stop,stop, stop, stop!
474 00:37:56 Ow!
475 00:38:13 Come on,keep it down in there.
476 00:38:47 Whatthe hell is wrong with me?
477 00:38:51 I'm so sorry.
478 00:38:58 I'm going to bein so much trouble.
479 00:39:06 I need to confess.
480 00:39:15 I need to confess.Will you hear me?
481 00:39:20 - Please.- Uh-huh.
482 00:39:29 Do you remember the kidfrom church?
483 00:39:34 The one in front of us.
484 00:39:40 Something happenedwith me and him.
485 00:39:44 Something pretty bad.
486 00:39:52 You wouldn't daretell anyone, would you?
487 00:39:56 Please.
488 00:40:00 Keep it between us.
489 00:40:26 Start with Chapter 6, please.
490 00:41:31 What a surprise.
491 00:41:33 Oh!
492 00:41:54 - Hello.- Is this Mrs. Nancy Eamons?
493 00:41:56 This is she.
494 00:41:57 I'm a counselorat Danning College.
495 00:42:00 I'm afraid I have some disturbing newsabout your son's behavior at school.
496 00:42:04 What?
497 00:42:05 What about him?
498 00:42:08 - Did he give you a name?- I need you to answer my question.
499 00:42:10 - If he gave you a name...- Please, Jared, just answer.
500 00:42:11 I'm just saying.Why wouldn't he...
501 00:42:12 Have you been doingthe things he said?
502 00:42:14 - Why wouldn't he give you a name?- Come on, son, enough.
503 00:42:15 Tell me the truth.
504 00:42:17 - I'm asking questions, too.- He didn't give me a name. I don't...
505 00:42:20 The guy's full of shit.
506 00:42:21 - He's telling a bunch of lies.- Now, you will not talk like that
507 00:42:23 in this housein front of your mother.
508 00:42:24 You just watch your mouth.
509 00:42:25 Nancy, if... If you could justgive us a moment, you know,
510 00:42:28 - just to...- I'm... I'm leaving...
511 00:42:29 Sit down.You will not leave the room.
512 00:42:31 You will sit down, boy.
513 00:42:32 - You will sit down.- It's bullshit, Dad. It's bullshit.
514 00:42:35 I just asked youto watch your mouth.
515 00:42:40 I think, um,he said he was a counselor,
516 00:42:42 and then...And I asked for his name
517 00:42:45 - and then I asked for...- Nancy.
518 00:42:46 - You see?- His number and he didn't...
519 00:42:48 Nancy, please.
520 00:42:49 Dad, I...
521 00:42:51 He's made all of this up.
522 00:42:54 Let's just sit here.
523 00:42:55 - We're just going to talk calmly.- All right. All right.
524 00:42:59 - No, Dad.- Jared.
525 00:43:06 I just need you to tell methe truth, that's all.
526 00:43:09 What this man saysof you, Jared.
527 00:43:14 Are you a homosexual?
528 00:43:20 Jared.
529 00:43:22 We are not finished.
530 00:43:24 - I am, because you won't listen.- Honey. Honey.
531 00:43:27 - What this man says, is it true?- What, this full-of-shit guy...
532 00:43:30 - Answer me.- ...who is not a counselor,
533 00:43:31 who raped a kidat his own church
534 00:43:35 and God knows who else.
535 00:43:37 Dad, you're hurting me.
536 00:43:39 - Marshall.- His name is Henry Wallace.
537 00:43:41 He's... He's not a counselor,he's a student.
538 00:43:44 - All right.- And... And...
539 00:43:46 He told mehe did some bad things.
540 00:43:48 I think he thinksI'm going to tell on him.
541 00:43:51 Honey.
542 00:43:54 Son.
543 00:44:08 Fight!
544 00:44:19 Go to war!
545 00:44:32 Your mother's making dinner.
546 00:44:36 I'm okay. I'm not hungry.
547 00:44:43 I want you to write downthis man's name,
548 00:44:47 his church, phone number if you have it.Any information at all.
549 00:44:52 - I don't want you to talk to him.- I ain't going to talk to him.
550 00:44:56 If he's been doing what you say,then he needs to be reported.
551 00:45:03 Okay.
552 00:45:05 Now, you know what I did? I invited Chloeand her parents for lunch tomorrow.
553 00:45:09 I was thinking it would be funif you could join in.
554 00:45:12 Missing one more day of classain't gonna end the world.
555 00:45:16 You know, Jared...
556 00:45:19 ...as far as I can tell,
557 00:45:22 we've only gotone God-given right.
558 00:45:25 And that is when a manand a woman come together.
559 00:45:28 They may create life.
560 00:45:32 You think how muchGod must love mankind
561 00:45:35 - to give us that awesome responsibility.- Dad.
562 00:45:39 It's really not true.
563 00:45:48 You know what I think aboutthese type of games, too.
564 00:45:53 Be respectful to your motherwhen she calls.
565 00:45:56 You come down and eat.
566 00:46:32 Honey.
567 00:46:33 All right.You want me to stop with the games?
568 00:46:37 I'll stop with them.
569 00:46:38 I broke up with Chloe
570 00:46:41 because...
571 00:46:48 We broke upbecause I think it's true
572 00:46:52 about me.
573 00:46:55 God help me.
574 00:46:59 I think about men.
575 00:47:15 I don't know why.
576 00:47:19 I'm so sorry.
577 00:48:13 God bless you, pastor.
578 00:48:19 - Are you okay?- I've had better days,
579 00:48:21 I can tell you that.
580 00:48:32 - Just a minute. Just a minute.- Mom?
581 00:48:34 Hold on.All right.
582 00:48:43 Why are Pastor Wilkesand Jim Picard here?
583 00:48:46 Pastor Wilkes has dealt withthis kind of thing before.
584 00:48:52 Jim has a son, Eddie,who, um...
585 00:48:55 You were a little boy,but...
586 00:48:58 Anyway.
587 00:49:00 - What did they do to him?- Oh, no.
588 00:49:02 You silly thing.
589 00:49:04 They didn't doanything to him.
590 00:49:07 They did things for him,
591 00:49:09 all right?
592 00:49:12 Just like they're gonna dothings for you.
593 00:49:15 Your father's wondering...
594 00:49:18 He's wondering how to help.
595 00:49:23 Come here.
596 00:49:25 It's all gonna be all right.
597 00:49:30 We've got one questionfor you, son,
598 00:49:33 and we're gonna let you sleep.It's been a big day.
599 00:49:37 I have sharedour conversations
600 00:49:42 with these two fine, upstanding men andI have asked them for their guidance.
601 00:49:48 I can tell you right nowwe don't have all the answers.
602 00:49:52 But I do know that you gonnahold the key to the next step.
603 00:49:58 Your mother and I,we cannot see
604 00:50:01 a way that you can liveunder this roof,
605 00:50:04 attend service and workat the dealership
606 00:50:08 if you're going to fundamentally goagainst the grain of our beliefs
607 00:50:13 and against God himself.
608 00:50:17 I'm gonna ask youthat question now, son.
609 00:50:23 In your heart,
610 00:50:28 do you want to change?
611 00:50:51 Yes.
612 00:50:53 Yes, I want to change.
613 00:51:00 Come a little closer, son.
614 00:51:02 Pastor Wilkes,
615 00:51:04 could you ask Jesusto shine his light
616 00:51:09 on my boy at this time?
617 00:51:13 Heavenly Father, I ask yourblessing for this family.
618 00:51:16 Give them strength.
619 00:51:18 Unleash your power
620 00:51:21 for one of your flock, Jared,who has lost his way.
621 00:51:25 We pray, Lord,that you make him pure
622 00:51:29 and that you return himsafely back to us
623 00:51:32 and see that the errors of his way arenothing more than a momentary straying.
624 00:51:39 We pray thathe see the path of faith
625 00:51:42 and that he striveto be honest
626 00:51:46 and that he then find the joyof a new life.
627 00:51:50 In His name we pray.
628 00:51:52 Amen.
629 00:51:54 Jared.
630 00:52:01 How's college treating ya?
631 00:52:03 Uh, it's going good.Yeah. It's good.
632 00:52:06 Your father's asked meto take some of your blood.
633 00:52:13 He wants me to...
634 00:52:15 To check fortestosterone levels.
635 00:52:21 I'm in a bit of a bind here, Jared, and I...I said this to your mother, too.
636 00:52:26 Now, I am a religious woman, there's...There's no... No question,
637 00:52:30 but I have also beento medical school,
638 00:52:33 and, well, you can say thatI hold science in one hand
639 00:52:38 and God in the other, and thatis not always an easy balance.
640 00:52:43 And I know that everybody wouldlike for me to say otherwise
641 00:52:46 and send you downto the pharmacy for a...
642 00:52:49 A pill that would magically fix you,but that's not gonna happen.
643 00:52:54 But I'm gonna take your bloodand I know...
644 00:52:56 I knowwhat it's gonna show me.
645 00:52:58 That you are a perfectly normal,very healthy teenage boy.
646 00:53:05 Jared, it's not my place to tellyou that your parents are wrong,
647 00:53:09 but let's saythat they are wrong.
648 00:53:13 I understand your father signedyou up for a program next month.
649 00:53:19 Whatever happens next,it is still your choice.
650 00:53:24 It may not feel that way,but it is.
651 00:53:28 You're 18.
652 00:53:32 Do you have anything that you'd...You'd like to say to me?
653 00:53:38 Any... Any questions?
654 00:53:45 No.
655 00:53:51 Jared?
656 00:53:53 Morning.
657 00:54:05 So, I wanted to talk to youabout these.
658 00:54:11 Uh, your writing.
659 00:54:15 This "Remy and Lucy met at midnightunder the stars on Willow Street."
660 00:54:23 What...Tell me about these.
661 00:54:27 It's... It's just...It's a story.
662 00:54:32 It's a love story about a boyand a girl, correct?
663 00:54:35 - Yeah.- But were you thinking
664 00:54:37 about two boyswhen you wrote this?
665 00:54:42 - No.- Be honest.
666 00:54:44 No, it's just a story.
667 00:54:48 It's just an assignmentfor college.
668 00:54:53 Jared, I've seen your readinglist for college. I have it here,
669 00:54:56 and listen, The Pictureof Dorian Gray, Lolita,
670 00:55:00 I mean, some of these...These books, Jared,
671 00:55:02 considering everything that'sgoing on for you right now,
672 00:55:04 I don't know that collegeis really the best thing
673 00:55:06 for you to bepursuing at all.
674 00:55:09 A year with us may be a much,much better use of your time,
675 00:55:15 given everything that I see,
676 00:55:19 and everythingthat's at stake.
677 00:55:24 And I'm willing to say thatto your parents.
678 00:55:29 Listen, I've hadmany wonderful conversations
679 00:55:31 with your parents.Lovely people.
680 00:55:32 So, I know some of your story.
681 00:55:35 And I know that there isquite a discrepancy
682 00:55:39 between what they were toldand what you said.
683 00:55:44 And you gotta understand thatthey don't know what to believe,
684 00:55:49 and that's very troublingfor them.
685 00:55:53 But I think thatyou and I know
686 00:55:55 that there is a wholelot more to the story,
687 00:55:58 and, you know, we're not hereon mere thoughts alone.
688 00:56:06 Jared, the... The people thatget the most out of this place
689 00:56:09 are the people that are justreally brave and honest
690 00:56:14 and lay everything on the table,ugly as it seems,
691 00:56:17 and fess up towhat God already sees.
692 00:56:22 And then, I can really truly assesswhat is the best future for you.
693 00:56:31 Okay, son?
694 00:56:35 Yeah. Yeah.
695 00:56:41 Dear Heavenly Father,today I ask your forgiveness for my sins.
696 00:56:47 For a year, we lived together underthe cover of being roommates.
697 00:56:51 But in reality, the whole time Iwas committing the sin of sodomy.
698 00:56:57 And then my family discovered the truthand brought me back to my senses.
699 00:57:01 They helped me realizethat I was fooling myself.
700 00:57:05 That I was being fooled.
701 00:57:08 That I was seduced into a life ofsin by all sorts of sinful people.
702 00:57:13 And I knew in my heart that Ihad forsaken Jesus for Satan.
703 00:57:17 But now,
704 00:57:21 I am awake to my sins.
705 00:57:24 I'm enlightened,
706 00:57:26 I'm here with all of you
707 00:57:27 and I'm disgusted at theperson that I once was.
708 00:57:34 I want to ask Godfor his forgiveness,
709 00:57:38 and I want to thankall of you guys,
710 00:57:41 especially you, Mr. Sykes,
711 00:57:43 for helping me get backon the path to righteousness.
712 00:57:45 We love you, Gary.
713 00:57:48 We love you, Gary.
714 00:58:05 Please don't do that, honey.You know I...
715 00:58:07 Mom, who did that happen toand when?
716 00:58:10 Seriously. Do you know?
717 00:58:12 Do you actually knowwho that happened to?
718 00:58:17 It never happened.
719 00:58:24 Parents wantto protect their kids.
720 00:58:26 - So they feed them lies.- I think that they're okay lies.
721 00:58:29 What? Like not telling mehow long I might be here for?
722 00:58:34 You know the whole thing youand Dad are paying for here
723 00:58:37 is all about how messed upwe are by our parents.
724 00:58:40 They want to know about you.That's why you can't know all about it,
725 00:58:43 because then they wouldn't gettheir money out of you.
726 00:58:46 What have Iever done to you, hmm?
727 00:58:49 Talk about me all you want.My conscious is clean.
728 00:59:02 Honey.
729 00:59:21 I'm gonna go for a run.Is that okay, Mom?
730 00:59:24 Mmm-hmm.
731 01:00:22 Fuck you!
732 01:00:26 Fuck you!
733 01:00:36 Fuck you!
734 01:00:42 Please,please give me strength.
735 01:00:44 I need your help.
736 01:00:46 Amen.
737 01:01:05 I'm reading it.No debate.
738 01:01:08 I have a right to knowwhat they're teaching you.
739 01:01:11 I don't see why anyone would readit unless you absolutely had to.
740 01:01:15 I need to knowwhat's inside.
741 01:01:17 There are tonsof spelling errors in it.
742 01:01:20 I almost want tomark up a copy for them.
743 01:01:24 But that would take away theonly real enjoyment you get
744 01:01:26 from reading it,because I guess it's
745 01:01:31 actually not much funto be there.
746 01:01:36 And I'm starting to wonder whetherit's really going to change me.
747 01:02:01 "We always come backto Dog's true design."
748 01:02:12 Almighty Dog.
749 01:02:46 Welcome to GodVersus Science...
750 01:02:54 Thank you.
751 01:03:38 Where are you from, Xavier?
752 01:03:41 I was born in Vienna.
753 01:03:43 I ended up in Canada,and now I'm here.
754 01:03:56 Do you believe in God?
755 01:03:59 I do, yeah.
756 01:04:01 Wow.
757 01:04:04 I question it, but I stillbelieve in God, yeah.
758 01:04:15 Who created the Earth?
759 01:04:19 You like a littlesmall talk, huh?
760 01:04:22 Do you believein the Devil?
761 01:04:29 Did he look like me?
762 01:04:33 I don't know.
763 01:04:51 Do you know Jobfrom the Bible?
764 01:04:54 Not personally.
765 01:04:56 I hear he's not great company.Always complaining.
766 01:05:04 I imagineI'm him sometimes.
767 01:05:06 And that God and the Devilare having a bet over me.
768 01:05:10 That one dayGod will let me in
769 01:05:13 on the experimenthe was having to test me.
770 01:05:19 I think we're our own God.
771 01:05:23 I mean, I think he's in us.
772 01:05:26 In all of us, not,you know, somewhere
773 01:05:31 hiding and watching.
774 01:05:45 Stay with me.
775 01:05:48 Nothing needs to happen.
776 01:05:51 I swear.
777 01:05:55 I'll prove to youthat God won't strike you down.
778 01:06:36 You wronged me, Dad...
779 01:06:39 - And I hate the way...- Louder, Cameron.
780 01:06:41 Can't hear you. Come on.I'll bring him closer, there he is.
781 01:06:46 You wronged me, Dad, and I hate youfor the way that you treated me
782 01:06:50 since you found outabout my problems.
783 01:06:52 No, about your sin.
784 01:06:54 Say that.
785 01:06:55 "About my sins." Go!
786 01:07:03 "About my sins,"come on, Cameron.
787 01:07:07 "My homosexual sins."Come on, Cameron.
788 01:07:12 - Cameron!- I can go.
789 01:07:14 I don't... I don't mind...
790 01:07:15 No, no, no. Jared, everybodygets a turn. This is Cameron's turn.
791 01:07:19 - "About my sins!" Come on!- Found out about my sins.
792 01:07:25 I hate that you never listen to meor acknowledge me.
793 01:07:28 And when you doacknowledge me,
794 01:07:29 it's to make fun of mein front of my friends.
795 01:07:31 "It's to make fun of me."
796 01:07:34 To make fun of mein front of my friends.
797 01:07:37 And that time that you told me thatyou wished I'd never been born.
798 01:07:41 That really hurt me.
799 01:07:48 Cameron...
800 01:07:51 Now, you saythat you're angry,
801 01:07:56 but quite frankly,I don't really see it.
802 01:07:59 Well, what's going onin there, Cameron, huh?
803 01:08:04 Do you want to change?
804 01:08:06 Now you're going to wishyou hadn't been born, son,
805 01:08:09 because God will not love youthe way that you are right now.
806 01:08:14 Unless you reallywant to change.
807 01:08:18 Well? Come on!
808 01:08:28 Well, I guess not.
809 01:08:30 I guess not. Okay.Let's take a break.
810 01:08:35 And you are going to stay hereuntil you are ready to go.
811 01:08:38 Everybody but Cameron,take a break.
812 01:08:45 I don't careif you sit there all day, son.
813 01:09:08 - Is this all a game to you?- What do you mean?
814 01:09:12 Listen, man.
815 01:09:14 You gotta think aboutwhy you went there.
816 01:09:16 You're trying to bail him out?Seriously?
817 01:09:19 And touching him like that?
818 01:09:21 Do you think no one saw?
819 01:09:23 You saw him.
820 01:09:25 He was very upset.I didn't mean anything by it.
821 01:09:28 I should report you.
822 01:09:29 True ownership, man. Okay.
823 01:09:33 This is whatmoral inventory is all about.
824 01:09:37 And you gotta quitstaring at me all the time.
825 01:09:39 These are the urgesthat we gotta stamp out.
826 01:09:42 Okay, you gotta control this.
827 01:09:46 - Do you even want this to work?- Of course I do.
828 01:09:49 We're all tryingto make this work.
829 01:09:50 I'm having a tough time, too,just like you are.
830 01:09:54 Listen, I'm fine.
831 01:10:03 It doesn't seem like it.
832 01:10:28 Hey, what are youdoing in here alone?
833 01:10:29 You're meant to attend bathroombreaks with a staff member.
834 01:10:38 What? Now you don'thave to pee?
835 01:10:44 Or are you going to dosomething solo?
836 01:10:49 That's whythey make them rules.
837 01:10:53 Not to be trusted.
838 01:10:56 Not at this stageof the game.
839 01:11:02 Hmm.
840 01:11:04 Sounds like Morse code.
841 01:11:07 Sending me a message,
842 01:11:10 faggot?
843 01:11:58 Starting to see itfor what it is?
844 01:12:07 You okay?
845 01:12:10 I'm fine. I'm fine.
846 01:12:13 I'm going to give yousome advice.
847 01:12:19 Play the part.
848 01:12:23 Show them it's working.
849 01:12:24 You're getting better.
850 01:12:29 Fake it until you make it,right?
851 01:12:34 You don't want to end up in one ofthose houses for any length of time.
852 01:12:38 I've heard the storiesand they're not good.
853 01:12:41 And that's where you'relikely gonna end up.
854 01:12:44 Sarah's already there.
855 01:12:47 So, play the part, man.
856 01:12:52 And then, once you're home,you gotta figure out what to do next.
857 01:12:57 If it comes down to it,you may have to walk away from everything.
858 01:13:03 Everyone.
859 01:13:08 Thank you for today, Michael.
860 01:13:10 - See you tomorrow.- Mmm-hmm.
861 01:13:19 You're gonna be on the podium any day now,so you should have a plan.
862 01:13:24 Unless you really thinkyou can change.
863 01:13:28 Or even want to.
864 01:13:38 I don't want to behere anymore.
865 01:13:39 It's a trial. It...
866 01:13:42 I don't feel good here.
867 01:13:43 Nobody feels goodabout you being there, Jared.
868 01:13:45 I don't... I don't...I'm not sure if I feel any different.
869 01:13:48 Son, son, you're not evenhalfway through.
870 01:13:53 Why didn't you tell mehow long I might stay for?
871 01:13:55 None of us knowsthe answer to that, Jared.
872 01:13:57 It's kind of up to you.You know, you just gotta give it a chance.
873 01:13:59 This is likethe book of Matthew.
874 01:14:01 The Devil's notgoing to ask you once,
875 01:14:03 he's going to ask youover and over again, son.
876 01:14:04 And you have just gotta find thestrength and commitment inside you.
877 01:14:08 You can get through this,okay?
878 01:14:12 Okay?
879 01:14:14 - All right.- It's late. Get some sleep.
880 01:14:17 - Good night.- Good night.
881 01:14:58 Jared? You're gonna be late.
882 01:15:33 I had thoughts of men.
883 01:15:35 Boys at school.
884 01:15:38 At college, I...
885 01:15:42 My imagination.
886 01:15:50 - Hey, what's going on?- I have no idea.
887 01:15:58 - Michael, what's going on?- Just grab a tie.
888 01:16:06 Sadly, we aregathered here today to say farewell
889 01:16:11 to our son, our friend,and our brother,
890 01:16:15 Cameron Van Heusen,
891 01:16:16 who by his own making last night,fell prey to Satan's wishes.
892 01:16:24 Brother Van Heusen, is this
893 01:16:26 what you want for your son?
894 01:16:29 No.
895 01:16:30 Young man, is this you?
896 01:16:33 Brother Cameron,is this what you want?
897 01:16:36 - No.- Both of you, come on.
898 01:16:41 Bring him down here.
899 01:16:44 - Let's go.- Who's gonna strike this demon down?
900 01:16:46 I will.
901 01:16:51 Out, you demon! Hit it!
902 01:16:53 - Get out of him!- That's it.
903 01:16:56 - Out!- Leave, demon! Leave!
904 01:18:55 Sarah, come on!
905 01:19:31 Stay with me.
906 01:19:37 I'll prove to you that Godwon't strike you down.
907 01:21:14 All right,take your seat.
908 01:21:15 Welcome back, son.
909 01:21:18 Now, I don't know about you all,but today, ooh, I feel invigorated.
910 01:21:23 And I feel hopefuland a true sense that
911 01:21:27 anything is possible todayin this room.
912 01:21:33 Cameron, how do you feel, son?
913 01:21:36 I feel great, sir.
914 01:21:39 Do you feel the true presenceof God in your heart?
915 01:21:43 Yes, sir.
916 01:21:44 And that feels great,doesn't it?
917 01:21:47 Yes, sir, it does.
918 01:21:49 For sure.
919 01:21:55 I'm happy for you, son.
920 01:21:58 Moral inventory.
921 01:22:04 Jared, you're up, son.
922 01:22:11 Come on.
923 01:22:12 Come on, son.
924 01:22:15 All right. Michael.
925 01:22:28 And when you're ready.
926 01:22:34 "I had thoughts of men.
927 01:22:38 "Boys at school.
928 01:22:41 "On TV. On the street.In my imagination.
929 01:22:45 "At college I held the hand of a boy andI stayed through the night in his bed.
930 01:22:52 "For these thoughts and thisaction for which I felt regretful,
931 01:22:55 - "I'd like to ask for God's..."- Wait. Hold on.
932 01:22:59 Jared.
933 01:23:02 Come on. What else?
934 01:23:06 I never...
935 01:23:08 I stayed through the nightwith a boy from college,
936 01:23:11 but we never didanything more.
937 01:23:12 Listen, don't even trylying to God, Jared.
938 01:23:16 He already sees.
939 01:23:18 So, come on. What else?
940 01:23:24 I lied on my genogram.My Uncle Chris wasn't an alcoholic.
941 01:23:27 Why don't you tell usabout this Henry boy?
942 01:23:32 That your daddytold me about.
943 01:23:34 That's not...That's not fair.
944 01:23:36 Why not?
945 01:23:38 That's not my sin.
946 01:23:40 Do you want to wastethese people's time?
947 01:23:42 I'm not.
948 01:23:43 No, these people who got uphere honestly and were brave...
949 01:23:47 Well, I could make something up,I could make something up.
950 01:23:49 Is that what you...Is that what you want me to do?
951 01:23:52 Isn't that a sin, too?
952 01:23:55 I mean, if thoughts are a sin,I ask God's forgiveness for that,
953 01:23:59 but I'm not makinganything up.
954 01:24:05 Okay, then. Okay.
955 01:24:10 Lie chair.
956 01:24:12 I just want to make useof some of this anger.
957 01:24:19 Uh, wait. Guys, just sit.Just stay where you are, okay?
958 01:24:23 Here he is, Jared.
959 01:24:26 Your father is sitting here
960 01:24:27 and I want you to tell himhow affected you are by him.
961 01:24:31 And how angry you are.
962 01:24:34 Tell him how you hate him for thethings that he's... The way...
963 01:24:37 - You can sit down. Sit down.- But I'm not angry.
964 01:24:40 - Yeah, I know.- And he's done things
965 01:24:41 - that upset me, but...- But you are.
966 01:24:43 - You're angry, but you don't...- He's let me down...
967 01:24:46 Why do Ihave to be angry?
968 01:24:47 Just sit.
969 01:24:50 - Sit down.- I'm not a dog.
970 01:24:51 - I know.- And I don't think anyone is responsible
971 01:24:54 for me, so I don't see how it's gonnahelp picking someone to blame or hate.
972 01:24:57 If you don't hate anyone, Jared,then where is all this anger coming from?
973 01:25:01 Because you'remaking me angry.
974 01:25:02 There you go!I want you to use that!
975 01:25:04 I'm not gonna pretend I hate my father.I don't hate my father.
976 01:25:07 Jared, you do.
977 01:25:09 You don't know me!You're all crazy!
978 01:25:12 - All of you!- Hey! I didn't...
979 01:25:13 Just... Jared.
980 01:25:15 You're in my chair.
981 01:25:17 - There you go! I hate you!- Jared!
982 01:25:20 But howdoes that help?
983 01:25:22 Jared!
984 01:25:34 Jared!
985 01:25:35 Who's in the front office?
986 01:25:42 Jared! Son, let's talk. Son.
987 01:25:47 Hey! Michael!
988 01:25:50 Hey, hey!Give it to me!
989 01:25:54 - I want my things and I want to go.- Jared.
990 01:25:57 Michael! Hey!
991 01:26:00 Hey! Michael!Get out of the room!
992 01:26:03 Come here, son.
993 01:26:08 Jared!
994 01:26:09 Hey, listen. What you're havingis a natural response, okay.
995 01:26:13 Just... Just breathe.
996 01:26:23 - Jared!- Hey, I just need a minute.
997 01:26:27 - Just go away.- Take a minute, okay.
998 01:26:38 Please pick up, Mom.
999 01:26:41 - Jared?- Mom...
1000 01:26:43 - Jared?- I need you to come get me, please.
1001 01:26:46 What's the matter?What's the matter?
1002 01:26:47 - Please, I'm in trouble.- What...
1003 01:26:49 What's happened?
1004 01:26:50 Best thing that we can do is probablyease him back into the session.
1005 01:26:54 - Hey, son.- I called my mom
1006 01:26:56 and she's coming to get me.
1007 01:26:57 Listen, you gotta understand
1008 01:26:59 what you're going throughright now is just a moment.
1009 01:27:01 - A moment? A moment?- Okay.
1010 01:27:03 And I feel exactlywhat you're going through.
1011 01:27:04 I think that you and I should justget everybody gone and we just talk.
1012 01:27:07 I don't want to talk.I want to go.
1013 01:27:08 Well, Jared,I don't want you to.
1014 01:27:11 I want you to stay.
1015 01:27:12 Well,I read the rules
1016 01:27:15 and none of them sayyou can stop me from leaving.
1017 01:27:17 I wouldn't.Can you just check where Brandon is, please?
1018 01:27:19 And if you or anyone puts their hands on me,I have witnesses.
1019 01:27:23 Nobody's going toput their hands on you.
1020 01:27:25 Why would anybody do that?
1021 01:27:27 Come sit.
1022 01:27:29 We're gonna waitfor your mom, okay?
1023 01:27:31 Jesus, our Savior,please focus on Jared.
1024 01:27:34 Let him see the strengthand courage that he needs.
1025 01:27:37 I want you to fill him right now withall the wisdom of everybody in this room
1026 01:27:40 to show him how much they love himand how much they care about him.
1027 01:27:43 - Be strong!- His journey
1028 01:27:45 into the fire that he's walking intoand what he's willing to face.
1029 01:27:48 - You are a man.- May you open his eyes
1030 01:27:50 and see the wisdomthat you have...
1031 01:27:52 - Jared!- Mom!
1032 01:27:53 - Jared, honey, what's happened?- Mom!
1033 01:27:55 - Hey, hey! Sit back down!- Mom, they're not letting me go!
1034 01:27:57 It's not thatwe're not letting him go.
1035 01:27:59 - Come on. Open this door.- Just hold on, Jared.
1036 01:28:01 - Mrs. Eamons, my name is Victor Sykes.- Who are you?
1037 01:28:04 We spoke on the telephone.
1038 01:28:05 I don't remember that.Open the door.
1039 01:28:07 Well, I spoke with yourhusband a couple times.
1040 01:28:08 Jared's just having a moment here borneout of the role-playing exercise.
1041 01:28:12 No, no! That's not true.Mom, tell him to open the door.
1042 01:28:15 - Slow down.- Enough. Open the door now, Mr. Sykes.
1043 01:28:18 - Can we just all...- I said open the door now!
1044 01:28:21 I'm gonna call the policeif you don't open this door.
1045 01:28:24 - There is no need for that.- Slow down. Right now.
1046 01:28:26 Let him go!
1047 01:28:28 You all right, honey?
1048 01:28:30 Just let him go.
1049 01:28:35 I just...I think that...
1050 01:28:38 Jared, come on.
1051 01:28:40 I just... I think it's moreimportant for his
1052 01:28:44 development right nowthat he...
1053 01:28:46 Don't even listen to him.Get in the car. Get in the car.
1054 01:28:52 You're gonnaruin that child.
1055 01:28:54 What are your actualqualifications, Mr. Sykes?
1056 01:28:57 I never asked. Hmm?
1057 01:28:59 Are you a doctor? Are you?Psychologist?
1058 01:29:02 I mean, a proper one?Are you?
1059 01:29:06 No.
1060 01:29:08 I didn't think so.
1061 01:29:13 Shame on you!
1062 01:29:16 Shame on me, too.
1063 01:29:18 Shame on you!
1064 01:29:48 Can I help you?
1065 01:29:49 Uh, I'm not sureif I'm staying or going.
1066 01:29:51 All right.Well, let me know.
1067 01:30:05 I talked to your father.
1068 01:30:08 He wants you to go back.
1069 01:30:17 I told him we'll see him at home.I told him you're not going back.
1070 01:30:25 You know that night
1071 01:30:28 when Pastor Wilkes and Jimcame to the house?
1072 01:30:33 Those men decided whatto do with you and I just...
1073 01:30:37 I fell into line,like I usually do.
1074 01:30:43 They say sometimes you gotta hurta child in order to help them
1075 01:30:46 and that may be sowith some things,
1076 01:30:49 but a mother knowswhen something isn't right.
1077 01:30:52 And I knew in my bones
1078 01:30:56 this wasn't hurting to help.
1079 01:31:01 I was just letting you downand I kept my mouth shut.
1080 01:31:09 And I will always regret that.
1081 01:31:16 But I can doa different thing now.
1082 01:31:18 Now that I have a chance.
1083 01:31:26 I'll handle your father.
1084 01:31:30 He can fall into line with mefor a change.
1085 01:31:39 Some folk, they don't go tochurch for the right reasons.
1086 01:31:47 Now, you know the type ofperson I'm talking about.
1087 01:31:54 They just turn up.
1088 01:32:00 They don't use every dayof their Christian life
1089 01:32:06 to praise the Lord and helpbring others to His word.
1090 01:32:11 It might be your neighbor,might be your friend,
1091 01:32:14 it might be just a faceyou only ever see at church.
1092 01:32:17 They just turn up.
1093 01:32:19 I will tell somethingthat I know.
1094 01:32:22 Just turning up to churchdoes not make you a Christian.
1095 01:32:25 Yes, sir. Amen.
1096 01:32:27 Study the Bible.Study His word.
1097 01:32:31 I can guarantee you,
1098 01:32:33 every question you have,
1099 01:32:37 you gonna find an answerin this book.
1100 01:32:41 Amen.
1101 01:32:52 Honey, um, do you know a boy, Cameron Van Heusen?
1102 01:32:59 Yeah. Is he here?
1103 01:33:01 No. No, no.That's the police.
1104 01:33:05 Apparently, this boy Cameronkilled himself last night.
1105 01:33:19 They want to ask yousome questions.
1106 01:34:58 - Hey! How you doing?- Good.
1107 01:35:00 Nice to see you! I'm good.
1108 01:35:04 I'm good. Here.
1109 01:35:05 Yeah, I thinkthey're in the dishwasher.
1110 01:35:08 Come on, Chris.Join us.
1111 01:35:11 Get out of the kitchen.
1112 01:35:22 I didn't even feel it.
1113 01:36:29 Mom...
1114 01:36:30 I gave it to him,he has it, and he'll read it.
1115 01:36:33 He knows he has to.
1116 01:36:36 Mom, it's important he reads it,can you just put him on?
1117 01:36:40 I'm calling you from Little Rock,I'm with Aunt Mary, so...
1118 01:36:43 Wait. Why?
1119 01:36:46 You should justcall him at home.
1120 01:36:49 What happened?
1121 01:36:50 Nothing, she just needed some helpwith the shop, so I came down here,
1122 01:36:54 and I'm driving back tonight,I'm...
1123 01:36:56 I mean, nothing.Nothing is wrong.
1124 01:37:28 Seriously, nothing is wrong.
1125 01:37:30 Why didn't you tell meyou were coming?
1126 01:37:33 Is he here?
1127 01:37:35 He left.
1128 01:37:37 It is Sunday, if it's urgent,you're gonna have to go to church.
1129 01:37:42 Why aren't you there?
1130 01:37:43 Why aren't you at church?
1131 01:37:48 I go, sometimes.I support your dad and...
1132 01:37:52 Mom, what's going onwith you two?
1133 01:37:58 Jared, it's...
1134 01:38:00 He knows.
1135 01:38:02 I can't be around the...
1136 01:38:07 I love God, God loves me.
1137 01:38:13 And I love my son.
1138 01:38:16 That simple.
1139 01:38:19 For your father,it's a little more complicated.
1140 01:38:23 I wish it wasn't,but it is.
1141 01:39:02 Did you hear about the articleI've got coming out in the Times?
1142 01:39:07 Do you knowwhat it's about?
1143 01:39:09 I won't get into a fight.
1144 01:39:12 Your mother told me, son.
1145 01:39:14 It's not a fight.
1146 01:39:15 I'm just doing the right thing.I'm letting you know.
1147 01:39:21 I've written more,
1148 01:39:22 and the publishers are talking aboutme putting together a whole book.
1149 01:39:27 You don't need to readany of it.
1150 01:39:31 I just needed you to knowthat it might be out there.
1151 01:39:34 Well,
1152 01:39:37 now I know.
1153 01:39:38 But it might be goodfor you to read.
1154 01:39:41 Because you never really askedwhat went on there.
1155 01:39:46 You never really knewthe staff or...
1156 01:39:49 - You're right.- Or...
1157 01:39:50 You're right.
1158 01:39:52 When the situation came up,I did what I've often done in my life.
1159 01:39:58 I sought the counselof wiser men
1160 01:40:02 and I followed their advice.
1161 01:40:05 What would you do now?
1162 01:40:07 Now that you arerunning things?
1163 01:40:09 Enough.
1164 01:40:14 Good night.
1165 01:40:46 For me.
1166 01:41:39 Is there somethingyou need help with?
1167 01:41:41 Because you knowI gotta make my flight.
1168 01:41:43 Yeah, now, this wasgoing to be for Christmas.
1169 01:41:45 But, uh, you know,your mother tells me
1170 01:41:48 you like to drive upstatesometimes to write.
1171 01:41:50 Dad, I live in New York.I don't need a car.
1172 01:41:53 She also tells meyou like to write by hand
1173 01:41:57 before you useyour computer.
1174 01:42:00 Just like me.
1175 01:42:03 This pen is made from acedar tree grown in Israel.
1176 01:42:10 Guided me.
1177 01:42:12 I've written every sermonthat I have ever delivered
1178 01:42:15 in this new churchwith this pen.
1179 01:42:21 One writer to another.
1180 01:42:35 I don't want topretend anymore.
1181 01:42:40 We don't need tospend time together.
1182 01:42:42 We don't need to speak
1183 01:42:43 unless we're going totalk to each other properly.
1184 01:42:47 Like...
1185 01:42:48 You've done somethings that have really hurt me.
1186 01:42:53 Like you never asked if therewas more to my story at college.
1187 01:43:00 You never askedif I was okay.
1188 01:43:04 You were too focusedon how it affected you.
1189 01:43:10 There's so many thingsthat we've never spoken about.
1190 01:43:15 And I don't knowif we ever will.
1191 01:43:18 Yeah.
1192 01:43:26 You know, all this wasgoing to be yours.
1193 01:43:29 I mean, it still will be,but I meant to run and to make a living from.
1194 01:43:38 I understand.
1195 01:43:41 We all got our own paths.
1196 01:43:45 The truth isI want you to do well.
1197 01:43:50 I want youto have a great life.
1198 01:43:53 I love you.
1199 01:43:56 But I can't pretend either.
1200 01:43:59 There are thingsI disagree with.
1201 01:44:02 And I'll admit, I'll be honest,I'm, you know...
1202 01:44:05 I am being prideful when I resent thefact that I may never be a grandparent.
1203 01:44:10 Now, that's just the truth.
1204 01:44:12 It's hard for me to admitthat I have hurt you.
1205 01:44:17 And that with my beliefsand with all that's gone on,
1206 01:44:20 I understand I may haveset myself up to lose you.
1207 01:44:25 And I've had to ask myselfand God if I'm ready for that.
1208 01:44:38 I do not want to lose you.
1209 01:44:42 Well, it doesn't feellike that.
1210 01:44:45 I'm sick of avoiding you.I'm sick of talking about nothing.
1211 01:44:49 I'm sick of it.
1212 01:44:51 I'm gay and I'm your son.
1213 01:44:55 And neither of those thingsare going to change.
1214 01:44:58 Okay, so let's deal with that.
1215 01:45:00 Or let's call it a day.
1216 01:45:03 Both of us would be okay,but that would be a shame.
1217 01:45:11 I'm not changing.There's no changing me.
1218 01:45:15 God knows I tried.
1219 01:45:17 So, if you mean it,
1220 01:45:20 if you really mean that,
1221 01:45:24 and you're not readyto lose me,
1222 01:45:29 then I'm sorry, but you're goingto have to be the one to change.
1223 01:45:34 I understand.
1224 01:45:39 I am going to try.
1225 01:45:47 I'll try.
1226 01:45:50 I gotta get going.
1227 01:46:18 Dad,
1228 01:46:20 I've invited Mom to my placefor Christmas.
1229 01:46:23 Yeah.
1230 01:46:26 You're welcome to come, too.