博物馆惊魂夜：卡门拉回归 Night At The Museum：Kahumunrah Rises Again(2022)(EN)Subtitles

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1 00:00:51 Literally walking here!
2 00:00:55 You little brat!
3 00:00:57 Nobody is stealing your toilet paper,Grandma.
4 00:00:59 He asked me to come to his comedy show.
5 00:01:02 I swear.The best Broadway show last night.
6 00:01:53 COMING SOON
7 00:01:54 KAHMUNRAHThe Disappointing Son
8 00:01:57 FRAGILE
9 00:02:16 I got rhythmI've got a new job
10 00:02:20 Your boy, Ronnie's gonna be a star
11 00:02:24 Holy cow! Look at this place.
12 00:02:27 The acoustics are… amazing--
13 00:02:32 Well, look at you, big guy.
14 00:02:34 Try not to upstage me, Mr. Naughty Bones.
15 00:02:37 Okay, Ronnie, just gotta get throughthis snoozefest of a night job,
16 00:02:41 nail your auditions during the day,and then Broadway pays the bills, baby.
17 00:02:46 Night Guard
18 00:02:51 A manual, huh?
19 00:02:52 INSTRUCTION MANUAL
20 00:02:53 I'm more of an improv guy.
21 00:02:58 Man, being this talented is exhausting.
22 00:03:11 I'm awake.
23 00:03:15 What?
24 00:03:18 Hello?
25 00:03:24 What? Where'd you come from? Give me that.
26 00:03:28 That's stealing,you thieving little chimp!
27 00:03:30 That's no chimp.
28 00:03:32 That's a capuchin, a new-world monkeyfrom Central and South America,
29 00:03:35 donated to this museum in the year 1962.
30 00:03:39 Who are you supposed to be?
31 00:03:40 Theodore Roosevelt,President of these United States.
32 00:03:44 Great. My first night,and I get a wacko with a monkey.
33 00:03:47 -I'm calling the police.-I wouldn't do that.
34 00:03:55 I give this guy three minutes, tops.
35 00:04:05 Are you the new night guard?
36 00:04:07 Yeah.
37 00:04:08 Good.'Cause we never found the old night guard.
38 00:04:14 He swears he didn't eat him!
39 00:04:21 Night guard!
40 00:04:33 Laaa make popcorn.
41 00:04:44 Popcorn hot.
42 00:04:56 -Did you see where he went?-Huh?
43 00:04:58 No. He's a slippery one.
44 00:05:00 Yep.
45 00:05:03 Found you, night guard!
46 00:05:06 Tiny people!
47 00:05:08 Hey! Who are you calling tiny, Gigantor?
48 00:05:12 -Stop right there.-Huh?
49 00:05:14 I, Joan of Arc,have had a heavenly vision of the future,
50 00:05:19 and you're not in it because you're dead.Boop.
51 00:05:33 Come on.
52 00:05:36 Why?
53 00:05:38 Why?
54 00:05:43 Two minutes and two seconds.That's a new record, everyone!
55 00:05:51 Hope you had fun-fun, dumb-dumb.
56 00:05:54 MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY
57 00:05:55 Forget this job! Forget Broadway!
58 00:05:58 -I'm going back to Ohio!-Hey.
59 00:06:00 Great. There goes another one.
60 00:06:18 Seriously, guys? Again?
61 00:06:21 Evening, Lawrence.
62 00:06:22 I presume you saw that manfleeing in abject terror?
63 00:06:24 Very funny, Teddy.
64 00:06:26 But listen, you gotta stopscaring the new guys off, okay?
65 00:06:29 I'm leaving for the summer,and I need someone to replace me.
66 00:06:32 Sorry, Larry,but he wasn't a good fit for us.
67 00:06:34 If only there were a fine young gentlemanwith your last name
68 00:06:38 that would be a perfect fitfor this institution.
69 00:06:40 Dropping hints left and right.
70 00:06:42 Oh, no. I'll call McPhee.
71 00:06:54 Mother, this bubble bath you sent meis too sudsy.
72 00:06:57 I can't find my boats.
73 00:06:59 Dr. McPhee, it's Larry.
74 00:07:01 Right!
75 00:07:02 Well, just so you know, "Mother" is mypet name for my supermodel girlfriend.
76 00:07:07 Uh-huh.
77 00:07:08 Well, we got a little problem.
78 00:07:10 The new night guardthat you just hired just quit.
79 00:07:12 Woe is me.
80 00:07:14 Where else in New York City will I find
81 00:07:16 someone who's capable of sitting at a deskand staring blankly into space?
82 00:07:20 Besides, this isn't your problem.
83 00:07:22 You're going off to yourfancy new position at the Tokyo Museum.
84 00:07:25 Look, I still really careabout this place, all right?
85 00:07:28 And I'm gonna findthe right person for the job.
86 00:07:30 Whatever. I'm doing my pores now.
87 00:07:35 What am I gonna do?
88 00:07:36 Here's an idea that we just came up with.What about Master Nick?
89 00:07:40 You know,the smaller, healthier version of you?
90 00:07:43 Ha ha.
91 00:07:44 But why do you guys keep insistingthat I hire my son?
92 00:07:47 -He knows the secret of this place.-Why, he practically grew up here.
93 00:07:50 -And he would never run away.-Like the last guy. Remember him?
94 00:07:54 Yeah. He was just here.
95 00:07:56 I don't know.
96 00:07:57 This is a big job, and Nick's still tryingto find his footing and confidence.
97 00:08:01 I mean, he's still just a teenager.
98 00:08:02 Teenager schmeenager. You werea teenager when you first started.
99 00:08:06 No, I wasn't.
100 00:08:07 I meant mentally. Emotionally.
101 00:08:11 Larry, Nick is a smart, capable kid,
102 00:08:12 and we believe that he is the perfect fitto protect this museum.
103 00:08:16 Huh. You might be right.Maybe it is Nick's time to shine.
104 00:08:22 -Coming through!-Huh?
105 00:08:25 Out of the way! Step aside!
106 00:08:27 Sorry.
107 00:08:39 Mia.
108 00:08:46 Are you okay?
109 00:08:48 Yeah. Hi, Mia.
110 00:08:49 What brings you hereto this side of the hallway?
111 00:08:52 I'm auditioning for jazz band next fall.Aren't you, Mr. DJ Perfect Pitch?
112 00:08:58 Wow.
113 00:08:59 You can correctly identifyany note in any song at any time,
114 00:09:03 and suddenly you've got a nickname.
115 00:09:05 I think it's cool.
116 00:09:06 You dropped an orange.
117 00:09:08 Yeah.
118 00:09:09 My mom makes me take a piece of fruitwhenever I leave the house.
119 00:09:13 Then she texts me to make sure I ate it.
120 00:09:16 That's her now.
121 00:09:17 "Orange you getting hungry?"
122 00:09:19 Okay. That's not embarrassing.
123 00:09:22 Fruit jokes. Very mom.
124 00:09:25 So, I heard you got a summer jobat a yogurt place?
125 00:09:29 Yeah. It was thator play bass in a subway station
126 00:09:32 for loose changeand unsolicited criticism.
127 00:09:36 Cool.
128 00:09:37 I mean, yogurt's cool.Otherwise, it would melt.
129 00:09:43 High five for yogurt. Never mind.
130 00:09:46 Don't know why I did that.
131 00:09:48 So, since you're gonna be here forthe summer, maybe you want to,
132 00:09:51 maybe one night, you know, go on--
133 00:09:53 Wait! I forgot, I'm late for my--
134 00:09:55 Nick Daley.This is your last call. I'm waiting.
135 00:10:00 Sorry, Ms. Montefusco.
136 00:10:05 I'm auditioning for jazz band in the fall.
137 00:10:08 I didn't know you played an instrument.
138 00:10:10 Well, technically, I don't.
139 00:10:12 -You're a singer?-No.
140 00:10:14 -Deck crew?-No.
141 00:10:15 -Tech crew?-Uh-uh.
142 00:10:17 -Composer?-No.
143 00:10:18 -Roadie?-Nope.
144 00:10:19 -Stand mover-upper-downer?-No, ma'am.
145 00:10:21 Are you sure you're in the right room?Because that last one wasn't even a thing.
146 00:10:27 Actually, I'm a deejay.
147 00:10:31 A deejay?
148 00:10:32 I know this may seem a little out-there,
149 00:10:34 but I have this ideato accompany the band.
150 00:10:36 I'd start with a classic jazz loop,
151 00:10:38 and mix it with a vaporwave thingwith some microtonality,
152 00:10:40 and two against three polyrhythms.
153 00:10:42 A what?
154 00:10:43 It's a multi-tonal PolyWave that--
155 00:10:45 Never mind the technical name.
156 00:10:47 There's a little bit of a buildup,but wait till you hear the bass drop.
157 00:10:54 Okay. Here we go.
158 00:11:16 I'm right on time for my audition slot,
159 00:11:17 Ms. Montefusco
160 00:11:20 'Cause everyone knowsBeing on time is cool
161 00:11:24 What's up, Rick?
162 00:11:25 Hi, Bodhi. It's Nick.
163 00:11:27 And your low E-stringis a quarter tone off.
164 00:11:30 Wait your turn, Bodhi.
165 00:11:32 Nick here was justin the middle of convincing me
166 00:11:34 to add a deejay to jazz band.
167 00:11:36 A jazz band deejay?That sounds so not normal.
168 00:11:40 Let's give him a chance, Bodhi.
169 00:11:42 It takes guts to try somethingwith such a high chance of failure.
170 00:11:46 To risk that kind of embarrassment,
171 00:11:48 he must be extremely confidentin his abilities.
172 00:11:56 Okay. Here we go.
173 00:11:59 Oh, sorry, that was the wrong one.
174 00:12:01 Wait.
175 00:12:03 Forget it. This was a terrible idea.
176 00:12:06 -Actually, I---What was I thinking?
177 00:12:08 I'm sorry I wasted your time,and possibly broke your piano.
178 00:12:11 I'll just take my leave.
179 00:12:13 I mean, who says that, right?I'll be going now.
180 00:12:16 Nick, wait.
181 00:12:17 Ms. Montefusco, I'm pretty sure it's Rick.
182 00:12:22 Yo, Nick. How'd the audition go?
183 00:12:25 Great! Just great.
184 00:12:26 I was so extremely confidentin my abilities that I decided to quit,
185 00:12:30 and, you know, leave them wanting more.
186 00:12:32 Okay.
187 00:12:34 So, you were saying somethingbefore you went in.
188 00:12:37 How we're both gonna be hereover the summer,
189 00:12:39 and how, I don't know,maybe we should go on a…
190 00:12:43 What? No.
191 00:12:44 I just,I was just gonna wish you good luck.
192 00:12:47 Okay. Well, have a great summer, I guess.
193 00:12:50 Yeah. Bye.
194 00:12:53 I'm such an idiot.
195 00:12:58 All right.
196 00:13:00 Classic Daley father-son dinner nightjust like old times.
197 00:13:04 Yay. Dinner.
198 00:13:06 Man. I'm sorry about your audition, bud.
199 00:13:08 How you holding up?
200 00:13:11 I don't know what's wrong with me.
201 00:13:13 I can't get in the band.I can't ask the girl I like out.
202 00:13:16 I'm useless.
203 00:13:17 It's like I step upto the free-throw line,
204 00:13:20 but I'm so afraid of missing the shotthat I don't take it at all.
205 00:13:23 Basketball metaphors. Okay.
206 00:13:25 Well, buddy, you miss 100% of the shotsyou don't take.
207 00:13:29 Although, I guess if you're at the line,
208 00:13:31 that's a free throw,so you have to take it.
209 00:13:32 It doesn't matter.
210 00:13:34 Anyway, speaking of taking a shot,
211 00:13:35 what if I told youI got you the best summer job ever?
212 00:13:39 Is it at a beach resort in Saint Bart's?
213 00:13:41 What? No.
214 00:13:42 Wait for it.
215 00:13:44 Night guard at the museum!
216 00:13:46 What?
217 00:13:48 That's hot.
218 00:13:50 Are you serious?
219 00:13:52 Yes!
220 00:13:53 Now that I'm gonna bedirector of the Tokyo Museum,
221 00:13:56 I need someone to take my place, andyou're the only person who fits the bill.
222 00:14:00 It's just,
223 00:14:01 I love hanging outwith everyone at the museum,
224 00:14:03 but a night guard is a big deal.
225 00:14:06 I literally can't do anything right.
226 00:14:08 You do not want mein charge of a museum, okay?
227 00:14:10 I'll just mess it up.
228 00:14:12 Buddy,when have you ever messed anything up?
229 00:14:16 Dang it.
230 00:14:20 Here.
231 00:14:21 Thanks.
232 00:14:23 I don't know, Dad.
233 00:14:24 Just 'cause you did the jobdoesn't mean I can.
234 00:14:27 I'm not sure I've got what it takes.
235 00:14:29 Sure you do. You're a Daley.
236 00:14:35 Anyway.
237 00:14:36 Look, Nicky, I know you've beenknocked down a couple of times,
238 00:14:38 but that's just'cause you're not seeing things through.
239 00:14:41 You just need to get your confidence back.
240 00:14:43 And I've got a hunch thatthis museum job will do just that.
241 00:14:47 How?
242 00:14:48 You're just gonna have totrust me on this.
243 00:14:50 That museum has a way ofbringing things to life,
244 00:14:53 and I'm not just talkingabout the exhibits.
245 00:14:55 So, what do you say?
246 00:14:56 Okay.But I'm pretty sure Mom has other plans.
247 00:14:59 Oh, trust me.
248 00:15:02 Your mother and I haveco-parenting down to a science,
249 00:15:05 and she is going to love this museum idea.
250 00:15:08 I don't love this museum idea.
251 00:15:12 -J---Nope!
252 00:15:16 I'm telling you, Erica,this is a good idea.
253 00:15:19 Larry, have you ever noticed that all ofyour ideas revolve around the museum?
254 00:15:25 Nick, could you give us a minute?
255 00:15:27 Sure.
256 00:15:32 I thought you guys weregonna go somewhere else.
257 00:15:34 Okay. Yeah, no,I'll just go work on my music,
258 00:15:37 which will never be appreciated by anyone.
259 00:15:47 Night guard?
260 00:15:48 Do you really think that's gonna help Nickbecome a confident and capable adult?
261 00:15:51 He doesn't even return my fruit texts.
262 00:15:53 You're one in a melon
263 00:15:54 What?
264 00:15:55 Look, I know he's gotsome growing up to do,
265 00:15:57 but I think this job is preciselywhat he needs.
266 00:16:02 Along with a soundproof room.
267 00:16:03 How is Nick supposed to learn how tolead people if he's all alone in a museum?
268 00:16:07 No, no, no, he won't be alone.
269 00:16:09 There's a big, fun, you know, night crew.
270 00:16:13 Night crew?
271 00:16:15 I really think we should sign Nick up
272 00:16:16 for theGenius Entrepreneurship Enrichment Camp.
273 00:16:19 You realize that spells "Geec," right?
274 00:16:22 Right. Well, math is the new sports.
275 00:16:25 Look, Larry--
276 00:16:26 Erica, you remember what I was likebefore we split up.
277 00:16:30 I was not my best self. I just wasn't.
278 00:16:33 But that museum job,it changed me for the better,
279 00:16:36 and I think it'll change Nick too.
280 00:16:39 You know what, Larry? You're right.You did change.
281 00:16:42 And, I don't know how or why,but working there turned your life around.
282 00:16:45 Almost like magic.
283 00:16:46 Watch it.
284 00:16:48 Yeah. Almost.
285 00:16:50 You know, you and I didn't alwayssee eye to eye as a couple,
286 00:16:53 but you've always been a good dad.
287 00:16:55 If you think this will help Nick,I'm willing to give it a try.
288 00:16:59 Thank you.
289 00:17:00 For what it's worth,we still make a pretty good team.
290 00:17:03 Yeah.
291 00:17:04 But if anything happensto my sweet baby boy,
292 00:17:06 I will go to Japan and personallythrow you into Mount Fuji!
293 00:17:12 That's fair.
294 00:17:26 Nicky, was that all you?Bud, you've got real talent.
295 00:17:29 Thanks, but no one's ever gonna hear it.
296 00:17:32 Well, how about a little good news?
297 00:17:33 Mom said yes! You start tomorrow.
298 00:17:36 Cool.
299 00:17:37 Hey, if I can do it, I know you can.
300 00:17:40 You'll be fine.
301 00:17:41 Because, if anything happens to you,your mom's gonna kill me.
302 00:17:44 But it won't.
303 00:17:45 This is your shot, kid. Here.
304 00:17:48 You're gonna need it.
305 00:17:50 It's yours now.
306 00:17:52 I believe in you, Nicky.
307 00:17:57 That makes one of us.
308 00:18:08 Well, well, well. If it isn't Nick Daley,my new night watchman.
309 00:18:12 Right on time at three minutes late.
310 00:18:15 Sorry, Dr. McPhee.
311 00:18:16 Look, the only reason I agreedto give you this position
312 00:18:19 is because your late father--
313 00:18:21 My father's still alive.
314 00:18:22 I know, but he was always late,just like you are right now.
315 00:18:26 Anyway, he assured meyou'd be a responsible replacement.
316 00:18:30 My feeling is that you won't be
317 00:18:32 because I inherently distrustand dislike teenagers.
318 00:18:34 -Dang it.-That slipped out.
319 00:18:36 Oh, no.
320 00:18:38 Okay. Well, you probably have importantmuseum doctor stuff to do, so--
321 00:18:43 Rexy, heel.
322 00:18:47 That was weird. You're a weird boy,and you make me uncomfortable.
323 00:18:50 If anything happensto my priceless exhibits,
324 00:18:53 it's coming out of your paycheck.
325 00:18:55 And pleasedon't do anything fireable tonight.
326 00:19:01 Okay, he's gone!
327 00:19:04 Night guard!
328 00:19:06 Yeah!
329 00:19:08 Hey, everybody.
330 00:19:13 Nice to see you too, Dexter.
331 00:19:17 Here's your crown back, Attila.
332 00:19:20 -Nick.-You're welcome.
333 00:19:26 Nick. Nick, Nick, Nicky, Nicky, Nick!
334 00:19:29 Very inventive, Laaa.
335 00:19:33 But please put the extinguisher backwhen you're done with it.
336 00:19:36 Good idea.
337 00:19:43 It's great to see you again, Nick.
338 00:19:45 What a fantastic ideato hire you for this position.
339 00:19:49 -I wonder whose idea that was, huh?-Right.
340 00:19:54 You have some foam on your nose.
341 00:19:57 We're thrilled that you will becarrying on the Daley tradition.
342 00:20:00 Not "daily," as in daytime."Daley," as in your last name.
343 00:20:03 Obviously, you will be working at night.I'll stop talking now so you can speak.
344 00:20:08 It'll be great to hang outwith you guys every night.
345 00:20:10 I just hope I'm up to the job.
346 00:20:12 Of course you are.All you need is grit, moxie, and--
347 00:20:17 Give me gum-gum, Dumb-Dumb's son-son.
348 00:20:20 My name's Nick, and I don't have gum.
349 00:20:23 You do now,
350 00:20:24 'cause you stepped in some-some.
351 00:20:26 I'm just gonna block him out.
352 00:20:28 Nicola!
353 00:20:29 Never turn your back on conflict.
354 00:20:32 We must have the courageto face our enemies,
355 00:20:34 not bury our heads in the sandlike the cowardly ostrich.
356 00:20:39 Not everything is about you, Jiji.
357 00:20:43 Right. Thanks, Joan. Good advice.
358 00:20:46 She scares me a little.
359 00:20:48 I know, right?
360 00:20:51 Just as the Roman armywas emboldened to take Carthage,
361 00:20:55 we shall now take that giant candy bar!
362 00:20:59 Charge!
363 00:21:00 Yeah!
364 00:21:10 Jedediah. Octavius.
365 00:21:13 You guys are gonna need a longer rope.Or some cash.
366 00:21:21 Want me to unwrap it for you?
367 00:21:23 That won't be necessary, Nicholas.
368 00:21:25 I am a master swordsman,trained in the elite Praetorian guard.
369 00:21:34 Maybe you couldjust rip the corner a little.
370 00:21:42 I love me my nougats.
371 00:21:43 Nick! We have a surprise for you.
372 00:21:46 In honor of your first nightat the museum, we all got you gifts.
373 00:21:48 Mine is my old glasses case.
374 00:21:50 Thanks, Teddy. But I don't wear glasses.Also, somebody shot this?
375 00:21:55 That case saved mefrom an assassin's bullet.
376 00:21:58 I consider it a good luck charm,and I'd like you to have it.
377 00:22:01 Of course, now and again,
378 00:22:02 I'll need to borrow itto put my glasses in, or sometimes mints.
379 00:22:04 I keep mints in it also. Little secret.
380 00:22:09 Here, Nick.
381 00:22:10 Thanks, Sacagawea.Authentic Shoshone Indian beads.
382 00:22:15 Actually, they're from the gift shop.
383 00:22:17 I also got you this poster.
384 00:22:19 A poster of your museum.
385 00:22:21 Our museum.
386 00:22:23 Thanks.
387 00:22:25 Hey, Dexter. Is that banana for me?
388 00:22:36 Laaa unscathed.
389 00:22:39 I've been reading Laaa the dictionary.Trying to build his vocabulary.
390 00:22:42 Sacagawea adequate teacher.
391 00:22:47 Hey, guys, my dad's calling.
392 00:22:49 Say hi, everybody.
393 00:22:51 Laaa!
394 00:22:52 Dada!
395 00:22:53 I'm not your father, Laaa.We've covered this.
396 00:22:56 So, how's the Tokyo Museum?
397 00:22:59 It's pretty cool.
398 00:23:00 They've got a robot here that gives tours.
399 00:23:02 Welcome to the Tokyo Museum.
400 00:23:05 And the toilets? Smarter than I am.
401 00:23:08 Welcome to the toilet.
402 00:23:10 Anyway, you know the rule.
403 00:23:13 Yep."The tablet brings everything to life,
404 00:23:16 and everyone's gotta be in the museumby sunrise, or they turn to dust."
405 00:23:20 Established that.
406 00:23:21 Right, but just one more thing.Don't forget to lock the basement.
407 00:23:25 The basement?
408 00:23:32 Sure. No problem.
409 00:23:33 Right, but before you do that,
410 00:23:35 I'm gonna need you to go downthrough the basement
411 00:23:37 and lock the loading dock.
412 00:23:48 Do I have to, Dad?
413 00:23:49 Hey, gang,can you give me and my son a moment?
414 00:23:52 -Yeah, sure.-You got it.
415 00:23:52 -These are the moments you remember.-Cat's in the cradle. Roger that.
416 00:23:55 We'll be over herelooking at something else.
417 00:23:57 Nicky, I know you've always beenafraid of the basement, and that's okay
418 00:24:00 because there's some seriouslyscary stuff down there.
419 00:24:02 But this isthe most important part of the job.
420 00:24:05 Sometimes new exhibits come in,and they could be dangerous.
421 00:24:09 Okay. Got it.
422 00:24:11 You're going to be fine, buddy. All right?
423 00:24:14 I know the museum'sin good hands with you,
424 00:24:16 because you're not just my son,you're the best person I know.
425 00:24:19 And you can do anything,
426 00:24:21 specifically starting withlocking the loading dock, I would advise.
427 00:24:25 Gotta go.
428 00:24:26 I tried ordering pizza in Japanese,
429 00:24:28 and some delivery guy just showed upwith several tanks of lobsters. So…
430 00:24:33 Bye, Dad.
431 00:24:34 All right, Nick. Here we go!
432 00:24:36 Your first big charge as the night guard.We're all counting on you to keep us safe.
433 00:24:40 Okay. Off to the basement!Off I go. What could go wrong?
434 00:24:47 He'll be all right, right?
435 00:24:48 Oh, he'll be fine. You heard the man.What could go wrong?
436 00:24:58 Come on, Nick. You're the night guard now,and you just gotta lock the loading dock.
437 00:25:05 Don't be scared.
438 00:25:07 It's really scary in here.Just don't be scared.
439 00:25:10 Dad said the one thing I have to dois lock the loading dock.
440 00:25:13 And that's all I gotta do. That's it.
441 00:25:15 'Cause I'm the night guard,and it's my job to lock the loading dock.
442 00:25:19 Gotta get through this.
443 00:25:24 Get it off! Goodbye.
444 00:25:27 Okay, how hard can this be?
445 00:25:30 Nuts.
446 00:25:31 Come on. Come on.
447 00:25:33 What was that?
448 00:25:37 Oh, no.
449 00:25:38 Whoops.
450 00:25:39 Stupid keys. Which key is it?
451 00:25:41 Come on, come on, come on!
452 00:25:48 Well, good enough!
453 00:25:59 I love messing with the new guys.
454 00:26:01 You think we were too much?
455 00:26:03 Nah. Why should the gang upstairshave all the fun?
456 00:26:17 Behold!
457 00:26:18 As written by Anubisin the Book of the Dead,
458 00:26:21 I, Kahmunrah, have returned!
459 00:26:27 Time to commence my planto rule the world!
460 00:26:33 Which is going to have to wait a secbecause my foot's asleep.
461 00:26:38 Wake up, foot. Wake up.
462 00:26:40 I command you to stop tingling!
463 00:26:46 Welp, all done locking the loading dockwith locks.
464 00:26:50 So, how did it go?
465 00:26:52 Oh, dear. Why are you so sweaty?
466 00:26:55 Global warming?
467 00:26:57 Come on. Who knew burning coalwould lead to all this?
468 00:27:05 Did someone turn on a fan?
469 00:27:07 I'm sure Woolly just broke some wind.
470 00:27:11 Well, no judgment here.
471 00:27:13 But let's clean these up.
472 00:27:14 Can't have a messmy first night on the job.
473 00:27:18 Wait! There's something missing.
474 00:27:20 Well,it's not the locked loading dock door.
475 00:27:22 That's not missing, because I locked it.
476 00:27:25 No. The tablet! The tablet is missing!
477 00:27:32 Come on, guys.
478 00:27:33 If we don't find that tablet,everyone in this museum is in danger.
479 00:27:36 -She's right. Let's go.-Bully!
480 00:27:38 Oh, no.
481 00:27:41 Where could it be? Who could've taken it?
482 00:27:46 I did.
483 00:27:48 That's right, Larry, I'm back, and you…
484 00:27:52 Look different? Have you had work done?
485 00:27:55 Larry's my dad.Who are you supposed to be?
486 00:27:57 Zip it, son of Larry.
487 00:28:02 You will refer to me as Kahmunrah,King of Kings.
488 00:28:07 -Good gravy!-Nick!
489 00:28:09 Your father thought he defeated me,but I'm back with a vengeance.
490 00:28:13 Where did you even come from?
491 00:28:15 The basement. Duh.
492 00:28:18 I thought you locked it.
493 00:28:19 I did.
494 00:28:21 Okay, I heard a scary noiseand I chickened out.
495 00:28:23 That was me! I was the scary noise.
496 00:28:27 I was trying this new guttural thing.
497 00:28:33 Well, it worked betterwith the acoustics in the basement.
498 00:28:37 And now that I have the tablet,
499 00:28:39 I'll use it to awakenmy army of the underworld.
500 00:28:43 That sounds bad.
501 00:28:45 It is bad.
502 00:28:48 And don't interrupt me.
503 00:28:50 I'll rule the world, and--
504 00:28:52 Dude, just give me back the tablet.
505 00:28:54 You did it again. You interrupted me.I want to kill you so many times.
506 00:29:00 Kahmunrah.
507 00:29:08 As I was saying, I'll rule the world,and everyone will bow to me.
508 00:29:13 Kahmunrah out.
509 00:29:15 Quick, he's headedthrough the Hall of Miniatures.
510 00:29:21 Where do you think you're going,tough guy?
511 00:29:24 Feel the wrath of my mighty sword!
512 00:29:27 Fire!
513 00:29:37 Fie on my penchant for sandals.
514 00:29:40 There he is!
515 00:29:41 Get back here,so I can stab you in the other foot!
516 00:29:44 Come on, guys.
517 00:29:46 Charge!
518 00:29:53 -Nick!-Oh, no!
519 00:29:56 Thank the god of personal training.
520 00:29:58 And with power like that,
521 00:30:00 you'll never stop me from taking revengeon all those who doubted me.
522 00:30:04 Especially you, Daddy.
523 00:30:07 You wouldn't let me be king of Egypt.
524 00:30:11 But forget Egypt.I'll be king of the world!
525 00:30:16 Well, you can takethe boy out of the underworld,
526 00:30:19 but you can't takethe underworld out of the boy.
527 00:30:21 He's headed for the Africa exhibit!
528 00:30:23 Quick, I know a shortcut.
529 00:30:26 Out of my way, you lame ducks!
530 00:30:29 Later, alligator.
531 00:30:31 Too slow, cheetah. Not today, Mufasa.
532 00:30:34 Nothing clever to say for a moose!
533 00:30:39 Come on!We've gotta stop that freaky pharaoh.
534 00:30:41 Technically, he's not a pharaoh.
535 00:30:42 He was passed over for his younger brotherbecause he's an unstable tyrant.
536 00:30:48 Intruder, surrender,or face the blade of Joan of Arc.
537 00:30:54 Really? Let's dance.
538 00:30:57 No dancing. Only fighting with swords!
539 00:31:00 Silly knight. That was a metaphor.
540 00:31:02 The only metaphor I need isto literally vanquish you in battle.
541 00:31:06 Metaphors are literally not literal.
542 00:31:10 Fine. How about after I slay you,
543 00:31:14 I dance on your grave?
544 00:31:16 No! There's no dancing.I was just trying to roast you.
545 00:31:21 Well, in that case, you're too late.
546 00:31:27 I was burned at the stake 600 years ago.
547 00:31:30 I didn't mean literally!
548 00:31:31 Quick, grab the tablet!
549 00:31:41 Yes.
550 00:31:42 World domination, here I come!
551 00:31:46 -Huh?-Give Laaa tablet!
552 00:31:49 -Well, since you asked so nicely. Psych!-Hey!
553 00:31:59 Yes.Just like I planned it from the beginning.
554 00:32:02 Now, if you'll excuse me--
555 00:32:05 It's you.
556 00:32:06 Was going extinct once not enough for you?
557 00:32:10 Eat him, Rexy. Eat him!
558 00:32:13 No, don't eat me!
559 00:32:14 Or it will be a real short movie!
560 00:32:22 Made it out completely unsca--
561 00:32:26 Yeah. That's solid gold.
562 00:32:29 He's getting away!
563 00:32:30 We need to figure out how to open this.
564 00:32:32 I got this.
565 00:32:34 I'ma blow this puppy to kingdom come.
566 00:32:38 Everybody, stand back!
567 00:32:40 Fire in the hole!
568 00:32:45 We are going to need a bigger cowboy.
569 00:32:47 Hey!
570 00:32:48 Wait. I have the keys.
571 00:32:53 You're in charge, Rexy.
572 00:32:56 Huh? Where did he go?
573 00:32:58 Wait. I'm having a vision.
574 00:33:01 Right.I forgot Joan has those mystical visions.
575 00:33:05 We are chasing Kahmunrahthrough a hallway of color.
576 00:33:08 But wait!
577 00:33:09 He slips and bumps into George Washington.
578 00:33:13 That's ridiculous.
579 00:33:15 How are we supposed tofind George Washington in New York City?
580 00:33:19 Metropolis Art Museum
581 00:33:20 That's how.
582 00:33:21 Oh, well, that makes perfect sense.
583 00:33:22 The Metropolis Art Museum!
584 00:33:24 But that's across town,and we don't have all night.
585 00:33:26 You know the deal.At sunrise, we turn to dust.
586 00:33:29 SubwaySeah Ave. Station
587 00:33:30 Come on. I've got an idea.
588 00:33:35 B Uptown
589 00:33:39 Are you all cosplaying forthe comic book convention in town?
590 00:33:42 Really? You think I'm weird?
591 00:33:44 There's a man over there dressedas a pirate, feeding a churro to a lizard.
592 00:33:48 Attagirl. Aren't you a pretty ballerina?
593 00:33:51 You walked the plank right into my heart.
594 00:33:54 What a weirdo.
595 00:33:56 Yeah.She'd never make it as a real ballerina.
596 00:34:06 METROPOLIS ART MUSEUM
597 00:34:07 I've made it!
598 00:34:08 Finally.
599 00:34:10 Awaken, my loyal subjects!
600 00:34:13 I'm alive!
601 00:34:15 I'm alive.
602 00:34:16 And I'm still broken?
603 00:34:19 And my nose itches.
604 00:34:25 Look what the sphinx dragged in.
605 00:34:27 Welcome, your highness.
606 00:34:29 About time.I'm freezing, and this is my summer tunic.
607 00:34:34 Yes.
608 00:34:35 My destiny is so close I can feel it.
609 00:34:39 And my kingly instincts tell meit's this way.
610 00:34:43 Though the map does say it's that way.
611 00:34:46 Well, let's just go with the map.
612 00:34:48 The Book of the Deadwarned us about this jerk coming back.
613 00:34:51 Well, I'm gonna go grab a latte.
614 00:34:57 Well, Kahmunrah definitelybrought the tablet here.
615 00:35:02 This place is big.
616 00:35:05 Everything is big to us.
617 00:35:06 Yeah.
618 00:35:08 I don't get it.
619 00:35:09 How's Kahmunrah gonna get toancient Egypt from an art museum?
620 00:35:12 Of course! The Temple of Dendur!
621 00:35:16 Dur-dur?
622 00:35:17 Not, "Dur-dur." Dendur.
623 00:35:18 It's an ancient Egyptian templeon exhibit here.
624 00:35:21 Nick,just as the tablet brings us to life,
625 00:35:23 it can bring any art exhibit to lifeas well.
626 00:35:26 The tablet's magic will allow Kahmunrah to
627 00:35:28 enter the templeand go back to ancient Egypt.
628 00:35:30 What? How is that possible?He's gonna time travel?
629 00:35:33 Kahmunrah could usethe art in the temple as a portal,
630 00:35:36 just like Laaa is doingwith Whistler's Mother.
631 00:35:38 Laaa! Stop that.
632 00:35:42 Get out of my house, you half-naked brute!
633 00:35:44 Unpleasant! Distressing!Alarming! Calamitous!
634 00:35:48 Maybe I should take back that dictionary.
635 00:35:51 Nick, if Kahmunrahgoes back to ancient Egypt,
636 00:35:54 who knows what terror he could unleash.
637 00:35:56 As Laaa would say, "Everybody go…"
638 00:35:59 I can't believe this is happening.
639 00:36:02 Why couldn't I have a normal summer job,you know?
640 00:36:05 One without a maniac who rose fromthe dead to cause an apocalypse.
641 00:36:09 Is that too much to ask?We don't even know which way he went.
642 00:36:11 He went that way.
643 00:36:13 Wow. How do you know?
644 00:36:15 Because I am an expert intracking, surviving, outwitting,
645 00:36:18 and also, I can see him right over there.
646 00:36:20 Stupid map!
647 00:36:21 Let's get him!
648 00:36:23 It's going to be one of those days.
649 00:36:25 -Charge!-Let's go!
650 00:36:28 He's too fast!
651 00:36:30 Maybe you're just too slow.
652 00:36:34 Hey, Kahmunrah.How do you like oil paintings?
653 00:36:39 What?
654 00:36:40 Bully!
655 00:36:42 Row, row, row our boatGently down the Delaware
656 00:36:48 Duh, don't worry, General Washington,we got him.
657 00:36:51 Let go of me, you philistines!
658 00:36:54 There he is! Crossing the Delaware.
659 00:36:58 Stand back or wig boy gets it.
660 00:37:01 This is what I getfor going to New Jersey.
661 00:37:05 Wait, I got an idea!
662 00:37:08 We're going down, men.
663 00:37:15 Those half-wits are never going to quit.
664 00:37:17 I must find some way to get rid of them.
665 00:37:22 It's time for backup.
666 00:37:25 The ultimate backup.
667 00:37:37 I summon you, O God of Gods, to rise!
668 00:37:46 Yes!
669 00:37:51 Who dares awaken me?
670 00:37:54 It is I, the great Kahmunrah.
671 00:37:57 Mighty Seth, God of Chaos,I need your assistance.
672 00:38:09 Nearly, I can do it just--
673 00:38:11 Wow, you're not very god-like.
674 00:38:13 Frankly, I'm a little underwhelmed.
675 00:38:15 A little help.
676 00:38:17 Hello, anybody out there? Help me!
677 00:38:20 Now, I thought-- I--
678 00:38:22 I'm sorry,I thought I had it but thank you.
679 00:38:24 So, what can I do for--
680 00:38:30 Excuse me.
681 00:38:31 I stand corrected.
682 00:38:33 I guess big thingsdo come in small packages.
683 00:38:36 Hey! I'll have you know that I am thetallest in my whole family of jackal gods.
684 00:38:41 Fine, fine, I take it back.You're not little at all.
685 00:38:45 Good. Now, you said you needed my help.What's on your mind?
686 00:38:49 Well, you see,
687 00:38:50 I have this ragtag collection of misfitsthat I need taken care of.
688 00:38:56 That's them now.
689 00:38:59 Come on out, Kahmunrah.We know you're in there!
690 00:39:02 Do me a solid and charbroil them,will you?
691 00:39:05 What's in it for Seth?
692 00:39:07 Together we will rule the world.
693 00:39:09 With the power of this tablet,
694 00:39:11 we can awaken the army of the dead andforce mankind to bow to our every whim!
695 00:39:18 You are kind of a doofus, you know that?
696 00:39:21 But I am down with ruling the world,that's for sure. You know it.
697 00:39:28 It won't budge.
698 00:39:32 What is that?
699 00:39:33 Your demise, Lesser Larry.
700 00:39:36 Meet Seth, the God of Chaos!
701 00:39:39 Hey.
702 00:39:41 The God of Chaos is named Seth?
703 00:39:43 Shouldn't you have a scarier name? Like…
704 00:39:46 Okay, Seth works. We're cool.
705 00:39:48 Destroy them!
706 00:39:53 Pretty green fire.
707 00:39:56 Are you kidding me?
708 00:39:57 How are we supposed to escapeif you can't even hit them?
709 00:40:00 Hey, I am the God of Chaos.
710 00:40:03 If you wanted accuracy,
711 00:40:04 you should've woken up theGod of Always Hitting Stuff He Aims At.
712 00:40:10 What? He's a real god.
713 00:40:12 No, he is. He's a friend of mine.I will introduce you to him one day.
714 00:40:16 Enough of this child's play!
715 00:40:18 This will keep them busyas we make our escape.
716 00:40:23 Great Scott.
717 00:40:24 They don't call me the scorpion whispererfor nothing.
718 00:40:30 I don't think he heard you.
719 00:40:32 He just needs a little dose of chaos!
720 00:40:39 Run!
721 00:40:40 Great, now we're being hunted bya giant, god-powered scorpion!
722 00:40:44 We must get out of sight.
723 00:40:46 There!
724 00:40:54 What are we gonna do?
725 00:40:56 Let's sneak out while the scorpionis looking the other way.
726 00:41:00 Nick…
727 00:41:03 It's a fruit text from my mom.
728 00:41:05 -She's reminding me to eat my apple.-You've got to be joking.
729 00:41:13 Nick!
730 00:41:16 I respect all living things,but for you, I'll make an exception.
731 00:41:24 You stop, stink bug!
732 00:41:28 Take this!
733 00:41:36 Ouchie.
734 00:41:38 You've heard of the slice-of-life?This is the opposite!
735 00:41:50 Stink bug go…
736 00:41:53 That classic, Laaa.
737 00:41:55 Worst first night ever.
738 00:42:01 Uh-oh.
739 00:42:02 Hello, son.
740 00:42:03 Oh, it's you again, Father.
741 00:42:05 Your image seems to becarved on everything.
742 00:42:08 Why do you get to be in all the museumsand not me?
743 00:42:11 You really wannahave this conversation now?
744 00:42:14 Whatever. It doesn't matter.
745 00:42:15 Because I'm about to bethe most powerful pharaoh ever!
746 00:42:21 So this whole thing isbecause you have daddy issues?
747 00:42:25 You should try a therapist.
748 00:42:27 It's much cheaper than all this nonsense.
749 00:42:31 Yes!
750 00:42:33 Now with this magical tablet,
751 00:42:34 we shall go back to ancient Egyptand make all our dreams come true!
752 00:42:41 Hopefully, not all our dreams.
753 00:42:43 I keep having this one dreamwhere I'm trying to play the violin,
754 00:42:46 and it's made of bugs and I'm riding this,like, weird slug-cat thing.
755 00:42:51 Here it is, the Temple of Dendur.
756 00:42:54 Walk carefully, team.He could be anywhere.
757 00:42:59 Kahmunrah's done it.
758 00:43:00 He's traveled back to ancient Egypt!
759 00:43:02 And now we must follow himinto almost certain doom.
760 00:43:07 Oh, no. This is bad.
761 00:43:08 This is very, very bad.
762 00:43:09 This is very, very, very, very--
763 00:43:12 And now it's bad, and my face hurts.
764 00:43:13 Is it bad?
765 00:43:14 Or is it your chance to show Kahmunrahwhat you're really made of?
766 00:43:18 Still going with bad.
767 00:43:20 Okay, we have about four hoursuntil sunrise before you'll turn to dust.
768 00:43:23 Timer - 03:59:58PAUSE
769 00:43:24 I hope this works.
770 00:43:27 My first portal.
771 00:43:29 Come on. Kahmunrah couldn't have gone far.
772 00:43:32 Man, this sand is super hard to walk in.
773 00:43:34 It will be stuck in our shoes for days,
774 00:43:36 but that will be a luxury tolook forward to if we survive all of this.
775 00:43:45 Well, we're closer,but we've still got a long way to go.
776 00:43:49 Looks like we'll have to walk.
777 00:43:51 Good!
778 00:43:52 You know, I like walking and talking.
779 00:43:54 This will give us time toget to know each other better.
780 00:43:56 How many times have you come back to life?
781 00:43:58 For me, a gazillion times.The first time, I was so surprised…
782 00:44:04 I think I smell Kahmunrah's musk.Have we picked up his tracks?
783 00:44:07 No, not yet. That wind back theremust've covered them up.
784 00:44:10 Are you serious?
785 00:44:11 We're in the middle of ancient Egypt!
786 00:44:13 We're never gonna find him.
787 00:44:15 Nicholas, what's wrong?
788 00:44:17 Looks like Nick's got a little hitchin his giddyap.
789 00:44:21 Sorry, it's just--
790 00:44:22 I'm not cut out for this.
791 00:44:25 I'm only 18.
792 00:44:27 I'm just a stupid kidwho's in way over his head.
793 00:44:30 Do not say that, Nick.
794 00:44:31 When I was 18,
795 00:44:33 I led the French army to victoryover the English.
796 00:44:36 And I was only 14when I led the Lewis and Clark Expedition.
797 00:44:39 And I was just 13 when I helped Romeclaim victory in the Battle of Carthage.
798 00:44:44 And Laaa discovered fire when he was 11.
799 00:44:54 Fire burn.
800 00:44:56 I know the feeling.
801 00:44:57 Look, I get it.
802 00:44:59 You guys are amazing.That's why you're in a museum.
803 00:45:03 But I'm not like you, okay?Things don't work out for me.
804 00:45:06 I blew it with the girl I like,nobody wants to listen to my music,
805 00:45:10 and, by the way,
806 00:45:11 I unleashed an ancient godbent on destroying the world.
807 00:45:15 Every time I get a chanceto do something cool,
808 00:45:17 I always mess it up.
809 00:45:19 Come on, Nick. That's not true.
810 00:45:21 You give up on yourself way too easily.
811 00:45:24 You can do this.
812 00:45:25 Your father stood up to Kahmunrah,and so can you.
813 00:45:29 But I'm not my dad.I'm not a hero like him or you guys.
814 00:45:34 Nick, you have your own giftsthat make you strong.
815 00:45:36 You just need to believe in yourselflike we do.
816 00:45:40 Now the question is, where is Kahmunrah?
817 00:45:46 I picked up his trail. He went that way!
818 00:45:49 All right, everyone. That way!
819 00:45:51 That way!
820 00:45:52 No, Laaa. It's this way.
821 00:45:55 But you said that way!
822 00:45:59 You know what's weird?
823 00:46:01 Every time I come back to life,I put on, like, 15 pounds.
824 00:46:05 Please stop talking.
825 00:46:06 -Think maybe it's the stress.-A boat. Finally.
826 00:46:09 Quick, we'll take it down the Nile.
827 00:46:14 Okay, we'll take that boat.
828 00:46:16 Seriously, you should coveryour eyes when you sneeze.
829 00:46:28 They've taken the river.
830 00:46:29 Then we'll follow them by boat.
831 00:46:32 Laaa no like water.
832 00:46:34 Come on, gang, don't dawdle. All aboard!
833 00:46:45 Why are we going so slow?
834 00:46:47 This way, Laaa.
835 00:46:49 Ha! This way.
836 00:46:56 This reminds me of my days paddlingdown the Little Missouri River.
837 00:47:01 One day, I came across a gaggle ofimpressionable youths, and I thought,
838 00:47:05 "I bet they'd love to hear a chapterfrom my exhilarating adventures."
839 00:47:08 And in the midst of a tale,
840 00:47:10 where I taught a buffaloto play shuffleboard,
841 00:47:12 I turn and realizethose rapscallions had stolen my boat!
842 00:47:16 We're going slow again.
843 00:47:17 That's because Teddy stopped paddling
844 00:47:19 to tell a long-winded storyabout being long-winded.
845 00:47:21 Sorry! I use my hands when I talk.
846 00:47:24 Oh, boy. At this rate,we'll never catch up to Kahmunrah.
847 00:47:27 Wait! I see something. A vision.
848 00:47:30 Another vision? What do you see?
849 00:47:32 It's about you, Nick,
850 00:47:34 and whether or notyou will defeat Kahmunrah.
851 00:47:37 Really? Do I?
852 00:47:39 I see Kahmunrah.
853 00:47:41 He is using the tablet torelease an ultimate evil!
854 00:47:44 But Nick and Kahmunrah face off and--
855 00:47:46 And? Do I win?
856 00:47:49 I don't know. The vision ended.
857 00:47:51 Now all I see is Laaa's hairy back.
858 00:47:54 What's wrong, Laaa?
859 00:47:55 Dinosaur!
860 00:47:57 You're imagining things, buddy.
861 00:47:59 Dinosaurs have been extinctfor millions of years.
862 00:48:04 Laaa!
863 00:48:07 He says we're in ancient Egypt,not the Jurassic period.
864 00:48:13 Wait! That's no dinosaur!
865 00:48:17 That's a Nile crocodilejust like the one in the museum!
866 00:48:22 Laaa!
867 00:48:24 Laaa!
868 00:48:25 Fear not, Laaa. Help is on the way!
869 00:48:28 I've never wrestled a crocodile,but I did wrestle a bear once.
870 00:48:31 I was taking my morning constitutionalon a hiking trail in Yellowstone--
871 00:48:35 Teddy, will you stop it? Laaa's drowning!
872 00:48:39 Me forgot. Me no swim.
873 00:48:44 Dinosaur!
874 00:48:53 Grab the oar!
875 00:48:56 Is everyone okay?
876 00:48:58 Everyone but Laaa!
877 00:49:01 Hey, I think I have an idea.
878 00:49:03 Attila, quick. Can you get me over there?
879 00:49:06 On second thought, I changed my mind!
880 00:49:09 Laaa, grab my hand!
881 00:49:11 That's your hand!
882 00:49:16 Yikes!
883 00:49:20 Nick!
884 00:49:24 We did it!
885 00:49:27 Is it gone?
886 00:49:28 Oh, no!
887 00:49:38 Back off, croc.
888 00:49:42 Or become my next pair of boots.
889 00:49:47 Nick, that was incredible!You saving Laaa and all of that.
890 00:49:51 Yeah, but our boats are destroyed,and we lost Kahmunrah.
891 00:49:55 There's no way we're gonnacatch up to him before sunrise.
892 00:49:58 And it's all my fault. I doomed us all.
893 00:50:02 -Well, this reminds me of the time---Teddy!
894 00:50:06 I know, I know. I ramble.
895 00:50:11 At long last,we've arrived at the Temple of the Sun!
896 00:50:17 We're one step closer to ruling the world.
897 00:50:19 Great Ra, God of the Sun,
898 00:50:23 I, Kahmunrah, King of Kings,request to enter your--
899 00:50:27 Who dares to step upon the groundsof this sacred temple?
900 00:50:32 It's me, birdbrain. The God of Chaos!
901 00:50:37 Stop it, you're embarrassing me.
902 00:50:39 I'm not with him.
903 00:50:41 Never mind.
904 00:50:42 Sorry that I asked.The door is that way. Just go.
905 00:50:48 Yes.
906 00:50:49 The door to the ultimate treasure.
907 00:50:52 Only the keenest of intellectscan decipher how to open it.
908 00:50:59 You're really a train wreck,you know that?
909 00:51:01 Well, thank you.
910 00:51:03 Well, at least we're in.
911 00:51:05 Should be smooth sailing from here.
912 00:51:09 Looks like this place is booby-trapped.
913 00:51:12 Thanks for the heads-up!
914 00:51:14 Now get me out of here!
915 00:51:17 "Get me out of here, please,"is how we say it like a big boy.
916 00:51:22 Great, now we're lost in the desertwith no idea where to go.
917 00:51:25 Do you think I can get GPSin ancient Egypt?
918 00:51:28 Wait, Nick. Look what's on the horizon.
919 00:51:30 He went this way.
920 00:51:32 -That way!-Huh?
921 00:51:34 Laaa, no. This way!
922 00:51:35 Ha! This way.
923 00:51:38 You really gotta watchwhere you're going, Laaa.
924 00:51:40 You wanna be alivefor the end of the world, don't you?
925 00:51:43 Of course he does. We all do!
926 00:51:45 Except for the end of the world part.
927 00:51:47 Strange. I'm having déjà vu.
928 00:51:49 When I fought for France,
929 00:51:50 it felt as if I was fighting toprevent the world from ending.
930 00:51:54 Except back then, I was all alone.
931 00:51:56 This time it's different, Joan.
932 00:51:58 You're not alone.You have friends who've got your back.
933 00:52:00 And I have yours, mon amie.
934 00:52:04 Timer - 01:37:25
935 00:52:10 Look, Nick! It's Kahmunrah's boat.
936 00:52:12 He must be here at the Temple of the Sun!
937 00:52:16 Isn't it magnificent?
938 00:52:19 Thanks. You are not too bad yourself.
939 00:52:24 Come on, everyone. Not a second to lose.
940 00:52:28 It appears they've alreadylet themselves in.
941 00:52:34 This place is mustier than Sunday britcheson a Friday polecat.
942 00:52:37 Is that a real thingor do you just make that stuff up?
943 00:52:40 I make 'em up.
944 00:52:41 I'm not really sure what a polecat is,but it sounds cowboy-ish, am I right?
945 00:52:45 Hey! Kahmunrah was herenot too long ago. We're gaining on them.
946 00:52:49 We've got to catch them before sunrise,and we turn to dust! Come on!
947 00:52:52 Wait, look. I've seenthese hieroglyphs before on the tablet!
948 00:52:57 And these! I'm pretty surethey're ancient musical notes.
949 00:53:00 I knew the tabletbrought everything to life,
950 00:53:01 but I didn't know it played music.
951 00:53:03 I guess your dad was right.You are a musical genius.
952 00:53:06 He said that? I mean, yeah. No, of course.Dads are supposed to say stuff like that.
953 00:53:09 Doesn't mean anything.
954 00:53:11 Anyway, what does this mean?
955 00:53:13 It appears the tablet is a keyto opening the sarcophagus.
956 00:53:16 With three sacred chords,
957 00:53:18 Kahmunrah can summon his soldiersfrom the underworld!
958 00:53:21 We must stop him before he reachesthe top chamber of the temple!
959 00:53:24 We have one hour left.There's still time to fix this! Let's go!
960 00:53:31 These tracks are fresh.They must be close.
961 00:53:34 And watch where you step, everyone.There could be booby traps.
962 00:53:38 Booby.
963 00:53:40 Dook!
964 00:53:42 -Huh?-He said duck!
965 00:53:43 Pretty sure he said "dook."
966 00:53:48 From now on, everyone stay close.
967 00:53:52 Too close.
968 00:53:56 Okay, monkey. We watch for trap.
969 00:54:00 Huh? Fire help see trap.
970 00:54:04 Good idea, monkey.
971 00:54:17 Monkey ghost!
972 00:54:25 I really like what they didwith the columns here.
973 00:54:28 Very third dynasty.
974 00:54:29 Seriously, must we stop at every room?
975 00:54:33 You know, I may be the God of Chaos,but I'm such a sucker for interior design.
976 00:54:40 Kahmunrah!
977 00:54:42 You again?
978 00:54:43 Blast them!
979 00:54:46 Give us the tablet, Kahmunrah!You're outnumbered.
980 00:54:49 You're right.I'll just have to even the odds then.
981 00:54:53 Statue Warriors of Death,consider yourselves my new bodyguards!
982 00:55:01 You never had a chance, son of Larry.
983 00:55:07 Man. What are we supposed to do now?
984 00:55:09 Come on, Octavius.Nick needs a major pick-me-up,
985 00:55:12 and us two buckaroosneed to flimflam those shim-shams.
986 00:55:16 I understood about 40% of that,
987 00:55:18 but I believe what you are sayingis that it is time for us to save the day.
988 00:55:24 I hate being small!
989 00:55:26 Yes, it's a huge inconvenience!
990 00:55:35 Enough speaking softly, Nick.Bring out the big stick!
991 00:55:40 Haka!
992 00:55:49 It's the eyes! Go for the eyes!
993 00:56:14 Nick, a little help?
994 00:56:15 Okay, Nick, you got this.Just take the shot.
995 00:56:18 What's the worst that can happen?No, you know what?
996 00:56:21 What's the best that could happen?
997 00:56:23 Hey, Hawkeye, looking for this?
998 00:56:29 I never thought that we'd go outas a bite-sized snack
999 00:56:32 for two Egyptian house pets.
1000 00:56:35 If we're gonna be tater tots,
1001 00:56:36 hopefully, your fancy armorwill give 'em a tummy ache.
1002 00:56:39 Jedediah, you sweet, simple genius!
1003 00:56:43 Choke on this, foul serpent!
1004 00:56:49 And don't forget to swallow!
1005 00:56:51 Yeah!
1006 00:56:56 That's nasty!
1007 00:56:59 And don't come back!
1008 00:57:02 Uh-oh.
1009 00:57:07 Your tongue is like a cactus.
1010 00:57:10 And you could really use a mint.
1011 00:57:20 Yes!
1012 00:57:21 Hey, Count Hawkula!
1013 00:57:24 Dook!
1014 00:57:30 Did I say dook? I meant duck.
1015 00:57:33 Bravo, Nicholas!
1016 00:57:35 Now, let's go get the bad guy.
1017 00:57:39 Well, this is it.
1018 00:57:42 The moment of my revengeagainst a world that doubted me!
1019 00:57:48 Especially you, Daddy!
1020 00:57:50 You embarrass me.
1021 00:57:52 Why do I always get teamed upwith bad guys
1022 00:57:55 with unresolved childhood trauma?
1023 00:57:57 You should want to be evil for you,not for him.
1024 00:58:01 It doesn't matter! My time has come.
1025 00:58:03 It's the beginning of the end!
1026 00:58:06 Well, which is it?Is it the beginning or is it the end?
1027 00:58:09 What? It's both.
1028 00:58:11 Obviously, the end has a beginning.It has to start somewhere.
1029 00:58:14 Can you remind menever to time travel with you again?
1030 00:58:17 It's exhausting.
1031 00:58:18 Kahmunrah, stop! Don't do it!This could mean the end of everything!
1032 00:58:22 Not according to him.He says it's just the beginning.
1033 00:58:25 Everyone, shut up!
1034 00:58:26 Once I insert the tabletinto the sarcophagus,
1035 00:58:30 with three simple chords,my army will rise!
1036 00:58:35 I mean our army.
1037 00:58:37 That hurts like you wouldn't believe!
1038 00:58:39 Well, maybe next timeyou should be more considerate.
1039 00:58:44 Come on,we can't let that bully play those chords.
1040 00:58:47 Bully!
1041 00:58:48 I mean, yes, I agree.
1042 00:58:51 Don't let them near the tablet.Bonus points if you kill them.
1043 00:58:54 This is gonna get messy, which I like.
1044 00:59:00 Okay. First chord.
1045 00:59:08 One chord down.
1046 00:59:09 And now for the second chord.
1047 00:59:14 Nick!
1048 00:59:20 And now for the momentI've been waiting for.
1049 00:59:26 The final chord!
1050 00:59:28 No! We're too late.
1051 00:59:30 Only a miracle can save us now!
1052 00:59:48 A monkey and a cavemanshot out of that bird's mouth,
1053 00:59:51 and then he slapped you!
1054 00:59:53 What a twist.
1055 00:59:57 All right, now for the final chord.
1056 01:00:00 Only miracle save us now.
1057 01:00:05 Giddyap, tiger!
1058 01:00:07 A cowboy and a Romanriding a hairless cat.
1059 01:00:09 What are the odds of--
1060 01:00:12 Now for the final chord.
1061 01:00:29 Sic 'em.
1062 01:00:38 Remember, team,
1063 01:00:39 it's not the size of the dog in the fight,but the fight in the dog,
1064 01:00:42 and don't even noticethose dogs are humongous.
1065 01:00:44 I meant us dogs. We got a lot of fight.Never mind. Let's go!
1066 01:00:49 Bully!
1067 01:01:16 Charge!
1068 01:01:20 Nice job, everyone,we've got 'em on the ropes!
1069 01:01:23 Spoke too soon!
1070 01:01:25 Yes, attack, my minions. Attack!
1071 01:01:40 There's too many of them,and they just keep coming!
1072 01:01:56 Teddy!
1073 01:01:58 This is why you never messwith a Rough Rider! Joan, catch!
1074 01:02:03 I'm having a vision of mesmacking you with this flashlight!
1075 01:02:07 Laaa!
1076 01:02:11 My eyes!
1077 01:02:16 Attila!
1078 01:02:19 Sacagawea!
1079 01:02:23 Nick, you're up!
1080 01:02:25 Wow, I can't believe that actually worked.
1081 01:02:34 Come on, you lazy god.
1082 01:02:36 Destroy it all!
1083 01:02:37 Okay, you asked for it.
1084 01:02:49 Wow. Glad I'm not on your bad side.
1085 01:02:52 And let's keep it that way!No more calling me lazy! It's very mean.
1086 01:03:04 All right, Nick, think.
1087 01:03:06 If music brought them out,maybe music can put them back.
1088 01:03:10 Cover me! I'm going for the tablet!
1089 01:03:12 Nick, no! It's too dangerous!
1090 01:03:15 I got us into this mess,
1091 01:03:16 and I'm gonna get us out.
1092 01:03:22 Nick!
1093 01:03:23 Seriously? That was easy.
1094 01:03:25 I'm not dead yet, Kahmunrah.
1095 01:03:28 Thanks to these inauthenticShoshone gift shop beads.
1096 01:03:31 He's okay!
1097 01:03:48 Hey, Seth! Laser eyes are pointlessif you can't hit a target.
1098 01:03:52 How dare you? Watch and admire.
1099 01:03:55 Concentrate. Control your breathing.Visualize your target and shoot!
1100 01:04:06 I used my god powers to defeat myself?Who could have seen that coming?
1101 01:04:11 Fine. Leave son of Larry…
1102 01:04:17 to me!
1103 01:04:19 Oh, boy.
1104 01:04:36 Okay,the chords that released the army were,
1105 01:04:38 a D minor augmented seventh,and an A half-diminished seventh,
1106 01:04:41 and a C minor ninth.
1107 01:04:43 Maybe if I play them in reverse,
1108 01:04:44 the army will go backto where it came from.
1109 01:04:50 What are you doing? Get away from there!
1110 01:04:53 Just two more.
1111 01:04:58 That's quite enough!
1112 01:05:03 This is it, son of Larry.The beginning of your end!
1113 01:05:12 Nick!
1114 01:05:21 Stay strong, everyone.We must avenge Nicholas!
1115 01:05:26 -Wait a minute.-Huh?
1116 01:05:28 I'm all right.Thanks to Teddy's good luck charm.
1117 01:05:32 All according to plan!
1118 01:05:34 Well, yeah, more or less.
1119 01:05:36 I don't care how many timesyou cheat death.
1120 01:05:39 Without these instructions,
1121 01:05:40 you'll never harnessthe power of the tablet.
1122 01:05:44 Wait, maybe that's not the tablet I need.
1123 01:05:47 This is no time to check for fruit texts!
1124 01:05:52 What on earth are you doing?
1125 01:05:54 Ending this.
1126 01:05:59 No!
1127 01:06:12 Nick, look out!
1128 01:06:13 If I'm going back, you're coming with me!
1129 01:06:19 Hey, I'm okay. Did we win?
1130 01:06:22 I am flying!
1131 01:06:31 This is the end of the end!
1132 01:06:36 Oh, no!
1133 01:06:38 We got you, Nick.
1134 01:06:42 You'll regret this, son of Larry!
1135 01:06:51 The name's Nick. Nick Daley.And I'm the new night guard.
1136 01:06:55 No!
1137 01:07:01 Looks like he's ancient history.
1138 01:07:05 I hate you so much sometimes.
1139 01:07:09 Run!
1140 01:07:17 Ouch.
1141 01:07:24 We did it, guys. We won.
1142 01:07:27 And we got the tablet.
1143 01:07:30 Uh-oh. It's sunrise.
1144 01:07:33 We're not gonna make it back in time.
1145 01:07:35 I'm afraid she's right. It's much too far.
1146 01:07:39 Then, I guess this is au revoir.
1147 01:07:42 Although, technically,that means "until I see you again,"
1148 01:07:44 which is clearly not going to happen.
1149 01:07:47 But at least I can sayI have friends like you.
1150 01:07:55 Come on, guys,there's gotta be something we can do.
1151 01:07:58 Don't worry about us, son.
1152 01:08:00 The important thingis that you saved the world.
1153 01:08:02 I'm so sorry.
1154 01:08:05 I messed everything up.
1155 01:08:07 I wish there was some way
1156 01:08:08 this stupid tablet could magicallyget us back to the museum.
1157 01:08:13 Wait a minute.
1158 01:08:15 Maybe there is.
1159 01:08:18 MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY
1160 01:08:19 We're all going home together.
1161 01:08:20 Genius, my boy. A portal to the museum!
1162 01:08:30 Boy, am I glad I gave you that poster.
1163 01:08:32 Now, let's go home.
1164 01:08:34 All right, tablet. Do your thing.
1165 01:08:40 -Come on now!-Huzzah!
1166 01:08:59 Laaa.
1167 01:09:01 Rexy, we're home!
1168 01:09:04 Heel, Rexy, heel!
1169 01:09:08 I missed you too, big guy.
1170 01:09:10 We made it just in time.
1171 01:09:15 He said, "Thank you for saving us, Nick."
1172 01:09:20 "After putting us in terrible dangerin the first place."
1173 01:09:26 Nick.
1174 01:09:30 Bye-bye, son of dada.
1175 01:09:32 Laaa.
1176 01:09:38 Nick, I had a vision again!
1177 01:09:41 You will defeat Kahmunrah.Or perhaps it was more of a memory.
1178 01:09:46 In any event, it's been an honor.
1179 01:09:55 Heigh-ho, Jiji, away!
1180 01:09:57 You did real good, partner.
1181 01:09:59 Nicholas, you would've madea great commander in my day.
1182 01:10:03 Giddyap, tiger!
1183 01:10:09 -Hey, Dad.-Hey, Nicky.
1184 01:10:11 How'd your first night on the job go?
1185 01:10:13 You know, it was nothing special.Kind of dull, really.
1186 01:10:17 Dull, was it?
1187 01:10:19 Okay, to be honest,things got a little crazy, and-and I--
1188 01:10:22 Lawrence, you couldn't have founda better man to replace you.
1189 01:10:25 He's a chip off the old block.
1190 01:10:27 Growing up among my people, the Shoshone,
1191 01:10:30 we learn at a young agethat we all have a brave spirit.
1192 01:10:33 You just had to find yours.
1193 01:10:35 Take care, Nick.
1194 01:10:37 You too.
1195 01:10:39 Thank you for everything.
1196 01:10:49 I'm proud of you, Nick.
1197 01:10:51 I don't know what happened tonight,and frankly, I'm kind of afraid to ask,
1198 01:10:54 but it sounds like you did all right.
1199 01:10:55 Thanks, Dad.
1200 01:10:57 I mean, the truth is,I hit a few snags here and there,
1201 01:10:59 but it's not likeit was the "end of the world."
1202 01:11:02 Okay, maybe it was almostthe end of the world, but, like--
1203 01:11:06 I gotta go! Dr. McPhee's here.
1204 01:11:08 -Nick---Later!
1205 01:11:11 On the phone, are we?
1206 01:11:13 I hope the job's not interferingwith your personal life.
1207 01:11:16 Hi, Dr. McPhee! What's-- What's good?I was just--
1208 01:11:20 Not interested.
1209 01:11:21 Anyway, everything looks good.
1210 01:11:23 No sign of mischiefor other teenage shenanigans.
1211 01:11:27 You can go home now.
1212 01:11:29 Wait a minute.
1213 01:11:31 What is that?
1214 01:11:33 Look. It's a cute little kitty statue!
1215 01:11:36 Yeah! Yeah, I found itwhen I was locking the loading dock
1216 01:11:40 like I was supposed to.
1217 01:11:41 Good find, Nick.
1218 01:11:42 I'll put it right here on your desk,so you can look at it every night.
1219 01:11:47 Gee, thanks.
1220 01:11:49 Now, if you'll excuse me,
1221 01:11:50 I'm going to order some outfitsfor my new little kitty.
1222 01:11:56 See you tonight, Rexy.
1223 01:12:00 But first there's something I gotta do.
1224 01:12:10 Nick, you're back. What can I do for you?
1225 01:12:13 Look, Ms. Montefusco,
1226 01:12:15 I know you weren't a fanof my first audition,
1227 01:12:17 but I'm not giving up that easy.
1228 01:12:19 Huh? What's happening?
1229 01:12:22 I'm just asking for a second chance.
1230 01:12:24 So, before you kick me out,just listen to this.
1231 01:12:29 Hit it, guys.
1232 01:13:00 Yeah!
1233 01:13:02 Indeed!
1234 01:13:16 Joan!
1235 01:13:20 Come on, everyone. Let's conga!
1236 01:13:23 This way!
1237 01:13:24 That way!
1238 01:13:25 -Laaa, this way!-This way!
1239 01:13:28 Dexter!