姐妹 Sisters(CN/EN)Subtitles

SRT Subtitles download

Color: Size:1416 18202224 26283040 LightfaceBold StandardItalic

ASS Custom style subtitle

Subtitle Preview：
1 00:00:52 你这地儿挑得真不错You scored yourself a nice corner. Good job.
2 00:00:54 嗨我叫莫拉·埃利斯Hi. I'm Maura Ellis.
3 00:00:56 我不是搞宗教慈善的I'm not part of a religious group or anything.
4 00:00:58 我是一名护士 平时比较乐于助人I'm just a nurse who likes to give back on her days off.
5 00:01:02 知道吗如果你要睡大街的话You know, when you're living outdoors,
6 00:01:04 你可得好好预防皮肤癌skin cancer is a real concern.
7 00:01:05 我给你喷点防晒霜So I got you some sunscreen,
8 00:01:07 你手臂上都起黑点了and you, my friend, have some irregular moles.
9 00:01:10 你友善过度了吧You're a very friendly person.
10 00:01:12 要不要去我家洗个澡？Wanna come to my house and take a shower?
11 00:01:14 再帮你规划下人生目标？Maybe make a list of goals?
12 00:01:16 我有女票了Oh, I have a girlfriend.
13 00:01:17 非常好 睡大街是需要发泄下压力Great. It's important to have a lady out there in the street.
14 00:01:19 那种妹子怎么称呼来着？免费炮友?What do you call it, a road bitch or something?
15 00:01:22 她叫凯伦Her name's Karen.
16 00:01:23 喂奶的?街妻？Your little mama? Your street wife?
17 00:01:25 不管了(SIGHS) Anyway,
18 00:01:26 我这人很喜欢写鸡汤I'm pretty good with sayings,
19 00:01:28 这些卡片本来是要给我姐妹的不过这张送你了
20 00:01:32 如果没有黑暗的夜晚 那就见不到闪耀的群星Without the dark night, we would never see the bright stars.
21 00:01:36 是《暮光之城》里的吧？Is this from Twilight?
22 00:01:37 不是我自己想的No, I made it up.
23 00:01:38 明明是抄的Mmm, no, you didn't.
24 00:01:39 真的是我想的Yeah, I did.
25 00:01:41 回见了See you later.
26 00:01:43 等下Wait.
27 00:01:44 等等Wait a minute.
28 00:01:45 喂！Hey!
29 00:01:46 你不是流浪汉？You're not homeless?
30 00:01:48 你观察力真强You were on a roll.
31 00:01:49 那把防晒霜还给我Well, give me back the sunscreen
32 00:01:50 我那是给真正的流浪汉喷的！so I can give it to an actual homeless person!
33 00:01:53 比如这位女士Like this lady.
34 00:01:54 滚你妹！我是这里的经理Fuck off! I'm the manager here.
35 00:01:58 又猜错了0 for 2.
36 00:02:01 ”波伦塔”快来吃你的晚饭MAURA: Polenta! Come get your dinner.
37 00:02:04 (LAPTOP RINGING)
38 00:02:07 妈妈？Mom?
39 00:02:09 嗨 能听见我说话吗？Hi. Can you hear me'? (MEOWING)
40 00:02:10 嗨 女儿 你今天准备做啥呢？BUCKY: Hiya, kid. What are you up to today?
41 00:02:12 老爸坐到摄像头前面来我看不见你Dad, come in front of the camera so I can see you.
42 00:02:15 在医院工作还好吗宝贝?DEANNA: How are things at the hospital, honey?
43 00:02:17 我们听说亚特兰大遭遇风暴袭击了We heard that Atlanta had a terrible storm.
44 00:02:19 大甩卖买的Garage sale. Okay.
45 00:02:20 你俩要说话的话 能一起坐到摄像头前么Can you guys both sit in front of the camera when you talk
46 00:02:24 这样才能好好和你们视频聊天so that I can see you and hear you at the same time?
47 00:02:26 一完全不懂这鬼”Skype”软件一没啥难懂的We don? Get this Skype crap. There's nothing to get.
48 00:02:29 很简单吧 莫拉You're doing it. DEANNA: Maura,
49 00:02:30 我们有事给你说we have some news.
50 00:02:32 莫拉我们有事给你说Maura, we have some news.
51 00:02:35 天呐谁生病了？你想多了莫拉Oh, my God. Who's sick? BUCKY: Oh, for cry-eye, Maura.
52 00:02:38 放松点Relax!
53 00:02:40 我们决定We decided
54 00:02:45 卖掉房子to sell the house.
55 00:02:47 嗯 狠好孝 到底什么事？Yeah, okay. Funny joke. What's the news?
56 00:02:49 真的 我们要卖房予We are. We're selling it.
57 00:02:51 我们姐妹从小长到大的房子？The one we grew up in?
58 00:02:53 你俩这是玩房产权转换么？Are you selling it to each other?
59 00:02:54 不是No, honey.
60 00:02:55 那干嘛要卖? 我们不想要了Why would you do that? DEANNA: We don't want it anymore.
61 00:02:57 空间太大了 听着It's too big. Look, if this is some kind
62 00:02:59 如果你们是有财政困难我可以给你们钱的of financial thing, I can help you out with money.
63 00:03:01 不是宝贝DEANNA: No, honey.
64 00:03:02 我们只需要你回来收拾下你的卧室All we need you to do is to come and clean out your bedroom
65 00:03:06 简直和狗窝没两样了because it's a bottomless pit.
66 00:03:07 行 我回家 我到家之前你们别再搞卖房的事了Okay. I can come. Just don't make a move until I get there.
67 00:03:10 凯特知道这事么？Does Kate know about this?
68 00:03:12 我们还没告诉她BUCKY: We haven'! Told her yet.
69 00:03:14 你俩性格一个天一个地的You two take news so differently.
70 00:03:16 我们想的是We wondered if maybe
71 00:03:19 由你去告诉她you should tell hen.
72 00:03:22 因为我们不想去Because we don? Want to.
73 00:03:23 为什么总是叫我去？Why do I always have to be the one?
74 00:03:26 该死Oh, shit.
75 00:03:27 画面好像卡住了 等下 能听到我说话吗?I think you guys froze. Hold on. Can you hear me?
76 00:03:30 喂？Hello?
77 00:03:32 还在眨眼 你们这是装出来的You're blinking. You're fake freezing.
78 00:03:34 简直不可置信赶紧打给她你们可是她父母Unbelievable. Just call her. You're her parents.
79 00:03:38 (SNEEZES)
80 00:03:41 老爸 别装了Dad! Let it go.
81 00:03:46 瞎趴姊妹
82 00:03:51 最难看的妆就是只给你染发KATE: See, where most stylists blow it is they color your hair
83 00:03:55 却不给你画圣诞眉 嗯but they leave your Santa eyebrows. Hmm.
84 00:03:57 他们是半吊子 而我可是专业的They half-ass it, but I'm a perfectionist.
85 00:04:00 谢谢Thank you.
86 00:04:01 今天为什么要来遮白发 菲尔？So why are we covering this gray today, Phil?
87 00:04:03 我要去和新妹子约会 年龄比我小的妹子Well, I have a date with an engaging new gal, somewhat younger than me.
88 00:04:08 找年轻的真不错 因为和你同年龄的女人都很恶心对吧？Good for you, because ladies your age are gross, right?
89 00:04:11 我希望这眉毛看上去很自然因为这味道简直刺鼻Well, I just hope it looks natural. It smells very strong.
90 00:04:14 这味道很绅士的那些玩露天表演的都这么涂No. It's super gentle. They use it on pageant babies.
91 00:04:16 妈妈 我到家了！Mom! I'm home!
92 00:04:19 我女儿回来了！她出去半个夏天了My daughter's home! She has been gone half the summer.
93 00:04:22 我马上就回来 如果你感觉眉毛有灼烧的感觉 那证明在起作用I'll be right back. If it feels like it's burning, it's working.
94 00:04:27 哇！Wow!
95 00:04:29 你都出去这么久了！你这是又长高了？You have been gone for so long! Did you get taller?
96 00:04:32 我才出去一个月 而且我很久之前就停止生长了I've only been gone a month, and I stopped growing a long time ago.
97 00:04:35 额有温暖的感觉正常么?Um, is this supposed to be getting warm?
98 00:04:37 等它慢慢升温菲尔Let it cook, Phil.
99 00:04:39 额…HALEY: Um...
100 00:04:40 妈妈？Mom?
101 00:04:41 你干嘛在厕所里给客人弄眉毛？Why are you doing some guy's hair in the bathroom?
102 00:04:44 哈？这绝财有问题你好啊P.S. this does not feel right. Hello.
103 00:04:47 怎么没在沙龙做？Why aren't you doing it in a salon?
104 00:04:49 千万别告诉我你又辞职了Please don't tell me you quit your job again.
105 00:04:51 我没辞！I didn't quit! All right.
106 00:04:53 你知道11频道那个白痴女人吧You know that dipshit lady on Channel Eleven
107 00:04:55 就是直播体验新玩意的那个？who does the segments where she tries new things?
108 00:04:56 知道继续 她之前说她要刘海Yeah. Go on. Well, she wanted bangs,
109 00:04:59 后来又说不想弄刘海了but then afterwards she decided that she didn't want bangs.
110 00:05:01 然后我经理就开始撵我出去And my manager started bitching me out,
111 00:05:03 我就推了他一把然后他的眼镜就摔碎了so I shoved him and his American Girl Doll glasses broke.
112 00:05:06 懂了所以说你被开除了Okay. So you got fired.
113 00:05:07 你怎么老是这样妈妈？Why do you keep doing this, Mom?
114 00:05:10 想吃麦片粥吗？You wanna have a cereal party?
115 00:05:11 不想我想的是No, I don't.
116 00:05:13 你长点责任心我才不用负责所有事I want you to be responsible so that I don't have to be.
117 00:05:15 跟你一起跑去It is too stressful
118 00:05:17 你朋友家的沙发上睡觉sleeping with you on a pull-out
119 00:05:18 实在是压力山大couch in your friend's dining room.
120 00:05:20 她可不是我朋友 她只是我们临时的庇护所She is not my friend. She was our bug man.
121 00:05:22 我得学着不负责任I need to learn to be more irresponsible
122 00:05:25 否则我去了大学肯定不好过otherwise I'm going to be hazed so bad in college.
123 00:05:28 烫得要开始冒泡了It's bubbling like Pop Rocks.
124 00:05:29 我去安妮家住去 马上来I'm gonna stay at Annie's house again. All right.
125 00:05:31 你在撒谎 因为安妮和她家人去意大利玩了Okay, that's a lie because Annie is in Italy with her family.
126 00:05:34 我知道怎么用Facebook的I know how to use Facebook.
127 00:05:35 我会经常发照片给你好让你安心I will keep sending you pictures so that you know that I'm safe.
128 00:05:38 不行 你不能像这样再次离开 还不告诉我你要去哪No. You cannot just leave again and not tell me where you are.
129 00:05:41 知道为什么我不告诉你我去哪么?You know why I don't tell you where I'm going?
130 00:05:43 因为你肯定会像个疯子一样Because you'll show up there
131 00:05:44 又一股脑跑到我那去大哭大闹的！and you'll make a big scene like a hothead!
132 00:05:46 我脑袋不疯！只是脸皮有点厚而已I am not a hothead! I am brassy.
133 00:05:49 我爱你妈妈但你现在的生活实在是太混乱了I love you, Mom, but your life is just too chaotic right now.
134 00:05:52 这不叫混乱 凯特！It is not chaotic. DANA: Kate!
135 00:05:56 这是你的脱毛贴吗？Is this your waxing strip?
136 00:05:57 不知道 戴娜 应该是客人的I don't know, Dana. It must be a client's.
137 00:05:59 这是我家狗从肚子里排出来的My dog had this in his feces.
138 00:06:02 我还没来得及出手And before I could stop him
139 00:06:03 他把屎和脱毛贴又一起吃进去了he ate the poop with the waxing strip in it again.
140 00:06:07 然后从嘴里呕吐了出来 懂了Okay. And then he threw that up.
141 00:06:09 你知道我每天要亲它的嘴多少次么？You know how many times a day I kiss that dog on the mouth?
142 00:06:12 不正常的次数An unsettling amount.
143 00:06:14 现在我每次亲它Now when I kiss him,
144 00:06:16 我就会想到它吃掉了I'm gonna picture that he ate
145 00:06:19 陋生人的阴毛some stranger's pubes.
146 00:06:21 我和我狗的关系肯定会因此破裂And it's gonna affect my relationship with him.
147 00:06:24 我的天KATE: Oh, boy.
148 00:06:25 好吧 你想怎么样 戴娜All right. Let's bring this in for a landing, Dana.
149 00:06:27 你明早就给我搬出去You get out of here by tomorrow.
150 00:06:28 明早就搬！You're done!
151 00:06:30 我能搬去哪?Where the hell am I gonna go?
152 00:06:32 那你自己去给我女儿解释搬家的事You wanna explain that to my daughter?
153 00:06:34 海莉？Haley?
154 00:06:36 该死Shit.
155 00:06:39 海莉？Haley?
156 00:06:40 海莉！Haley!
157 00:06:44 海莉 快回来 我们再好好谈谈Okay, Haley, just come back up, and we will talk about this.
158 00:06:46 嗨 是我Hey, it's me.
159 00:06:47 有人吗？你这太不专业了Hello? This is very unprofessional.
160 00:06:50 嗨 我现在没空接电话Hey. I can't talk right now.
161 00:06:52 很快就好 老妈和老爸打电话给了我Real quick. Mom and Dad called.
162 00:06:53 呕 又有什么圣旨？Ugh, what now?
163 00:06:55 你还好吧？还顺利吗?What's up? Everything all right?
164 00:06:56 别 那里面不用涂药膏No, I don't need lotion in there.
165 00:07:00 相信我 里面确实需要涂药膏Yeah, you do need lotion in there.
166 00:07:01 嘿告诉你个有趣的Hey, here's something fun.
167 00:07:03 俩老人家让我们回家去一趟Mom and Dad want us to come down.
168 00:07:05 叫我们回家去收拾一下我们卧室的东西They need us to clear out some of our old bedroom stuff.
169 00:07:08 为啥？他们不是有房间住么Why? They have other rooms.
170 00:07:10 不知道 或许想买跑步机没地方放吧MAURA: I don't know. Maybe they wanna get a treadmill.
171 00:07:12 跑步机？老妈那骨头连坐沙发都喊疼A treadmill? Morn can't even sit right on a couch.
172 00:07:19 我给你修个眉 很快就好I'm just gonna shape them real quick. All right.
173 00:07:22 不行 我现在没钱买机票去奥兰多Yeah, no. I can't afford to come to Orlando right now.
174 00:07:25 那我把机票钱寄给你Well, I'll send you money for the flight.
175 00:07:27 去奥兰多吧 埃利斯姐妹团圆一次Come to Orlando. Ellis sisters reunion.
176 00:07:30 回家万事都会更好Corning home always makes things better.
177 00:07:34 其实这主意还真挺不错的That's actually a really good idea.
178 00:07:37 告诉我实话Tell me the truth.
179 00:07:41 下一站 奥兰多机场 感谢您乘坐灵缇客车Next stop, Orlando Airport. Thank you for riding Greyhound.
180 00:07:49 请保管好您的行李Please maintain contact with your baggage.
181 00:07:52 任何无主的行李将会被没收All unattended baggage will be confiscated.
182 00:07:55 嗨 能给我一小杯龙舌兰酒吗?Hey. Could I get a small glass of tequila?
183 00:07:58 你指的是一口杯？Like a shot of tequila?
184 00:08:01 对 一口杯 我形容得比较老派Yeah, a shot. Just keeping it classy.
185 00:08:04 这里是赫尔曼分机Paging Mr. Herman.
186 00:08:05 噢 赫曼先生！Oh, Mr. Pee-wee Herman!
187 00:08:08 瞧瞧你啊嗨！Look at you. Hi!
188 00:08:10 瞧瞧你啊 啊哈MAURA: Look at you. KATE: Uh-uh, uh-uh.
189 00:08:12 最近如何啊？没如何What's going on? Nothing.
190 00:08:13 哇转个圈这皮衣真软啊Wow, turn it around. This is soft.
191 00:08:16 你真漂亮 才没有You look great. No.
192 00:08:17 我看上去像个死人一样I look like a dead deer bloated on the highway.
193 00:08:19 不对 你看上去和漂亮的活人一样No. You look like a pretty deer who's still alive.
194 00:08:23 只是最近有点不顺而已Mmm. But also, just recently hit.
195 00:08:25 你头发真长啊像美人鱼一样 嗯Your hair is long! It's so mermaid-y.
196 00:08:28 噢 我这是假笈Oh, I got a whole intricate sewn-in system under there,
197 00:08:29 不过是人类的假发but it's human.
198 00:08:32 好吧 你弄假发得小心点Okay, well, you have to be careful when you get fake hair
199 00:08:33 有些国家遇到这种女孩 会给她注射鸡激素because some countries give their young girls chicken hormones
200 00:08:36 然后逼她们在地下室长出头发and make them grow it in their basements.
201 00:08:39 她们有钱拿么？有钱我都去Do they get paid? Because I would do that.
202 00:08:42 嗨 宝贝你肯定玩得很开心Hey, honey. I'm sure you're out having fun
203 00:08:45 但我还在等你那张答应好发给我的照片but I'm dying to see that photo you were gonna send me.
204 00:08:50 她这夏天玩得很开心She's having such a great summer,
205 00:08:52 但我觉得她肯定要开始想家了but I think she's getting homesick.
206 00:08:54 我敢肯定她很想你 我也想她I'm sure she misses you. I miss her.
207 00:08:56 生理上的想Like, in my body.
208 00:08:59 嗯 她要不了多久就会回来了Mmm. She'll be back soon.
209 00:09:01 你最近如何？有做什么好玩的事吗?What's your deal? Been doing anything fun?
210 00:09:03 有 搜救犬的隐藏技能可多了Yeah. Rescue dogs have so many hidden skills.
211 00:09:06 我最近在教”波伦塔”怎么闻出糖尿病I've been teaching Polenta how to smell diabetes.
212 00:09:09 你都离婚两年了You've been divorced for two years.
213 00:09:11 你起码叫上你的同事一起去智力玩玩You should at least be going to Chili's with your work friends
214 00:09:14 或者是类似的事or some such basic shit,
215 00:09:15 而不是整完呆在家里和老爸老妈视频聊天instead of spending the night on Skype dates with Mom and Dad.
216 00:09:18 我找的乐子可多了I've been having a lot of fun.
217 00:09:20 我一直在自学怎么制作奶酪I've been teaching myself how to make cheese.
218 00:09:23 我没事的 我很好 我好得不行I'm fine. I'm really good. I'm real good.
219 00:09:26 那你呢？有工作吗有住所吗?What about you? Do you have a job or a place to live?
220 00:09:29 我有一个主意可以解决我所有的问题海莉肯定高兴得要死I got an idea that's gonna solve everything. Haley's gonna flip.
221 00:09:31 H-么主意？What's your idea?
222 00:09:33 我们应该搬回老家I think we should move down here
223 00:09:34 然后陪老爸老妈住一段时间and live with Mom and Dad for a while.
224 00:09:40 ”给点关爱和理解”Give a little bit of heart and sou!
225 00:09:42 ”给点爱让其成长”Give a little hi! Of love in grow.
226 00:09:45 ”给点关爱和理解”…Give a little bit of heart and soul...
227 00:09:59 我了个老天啊Holy Moses with his balls out.
228 00:10:02 我看着的人是凯特·埃利斯？Is that Kate Ellis I'm looking at?
229 00:10:04 你谁Maybe.
230 00:10:05 嘿 现在真漂亮啊Hey, look at you.
231 00:10:08 拜托戴夫·布莱克蒙！那年我是学长你是学妹Come on, Dave Blackmon! I was a senior, you were a junior.
232 00:10:11 我为了跟你一级我还留级了I lingered back so we could be seniors together?
233 00:10:13 你是我第一个规定上床不准用手的You were my first non-hand I ever did it with.
234 00:10:16 天呐我记起来了 我把你耳环都吞了Oh, my God. Yes. I swallowed your earring.
235 00:10:19 简直太荣幸了That was a true honor.
236 00:10:21 谢谢 谢谢Aw, thank you. Thank you.
237 00:10:23 哇有人告诉我说你死了Wow. Somebody told me you died.
238 00:10:25 什么鬼扯 你已经是第二个对我这么说的人了That's crazy. That's the second person that's said that to me.
239 00:10:27 嗯 你最好去查查Hmm, you should check it out.
240 00:10:28 你知道吗 这片区大家都知道我酗酒You know, I'm a known alcoholic in this area
241 00:10:30 但我现在都还很怀恋以前你们姐妹办的派对but I still talk about those Ellis Island parties, baby. (VOCALIZES)
242 00:10:34 以前真是好时光 对吧？Such good times, right?
243 00:10:35 对啊 你以前穿着高跟鞋在壁炉上跳舞那幕Yeah. You scaling that fireplace with them heels?
244 00:10:37 老天那一幕简直太美丽了Oh, man. That was a beautiful sight, baby.
245 00:10:39 这位女神又是谁？And who's this fine-ass female?
246 00:10:43 嗨 戴夫 我是莫拉凯特的妹妹Hi, Dave. I'm Maura, Kate's younger sister.
247 00:10:46 有次在派对上 你吐得时候我拉着你的衣服I held your mullet back one time when you were vomiting at our party
248 00:10:49 所以你才没一脸扎进我们那仙人掌花园so you wouldn't impale your face on our cactus garden.
249 00:10:52 还真是 那次可好玩了 对吧？No. Shit. Those were fun times, though, huh?
250 00:10:55 嗯 某方面是很好玩Yeah. You know, in a way.
251 00:10:58 女大真是十八变啊 我的天…You sure bloomed into a juicy peach, holy...
252 00:11:00 谢谢你 戴夫Thank you, Dave.
253 00:11:01 这是你开的贩酒店？KATE: So is this your liquor store?
254 00:11:03 你懂的 做点小酒生意Oh, you know, I got some stock, I got some handshake options.
255 00:11:06 因为你们已经听说了吧？Because you heard what happened, right?
256 00:11:07 我的摩托车间塌陷到地里去了？My mobile townhouse got ate by a sinkhole.
257 00:11:10 塌陷到地里去了？No. Eaten by a sinkhole?
258 00:11:11 嗯嗯 太可惜了Mmm-hmm. That is a Florida heartbreak.
259 00:11:14 哇和埃利斯姐妹玩3P是什么感觉啊?Wow, the Ellis sisters, man. What a sandwich that would be, huh?
260 00:11:16 如果我能跑去和我朋友炫耀 老天If I could tell my friends that that went down-(LAUGHS) Oh, man.
261 00:11:19 你们意下如何？What do you think?
262 00:11:21 啥？噢Who? Oh...
263 00:11:22 说说而已Just putting it out there.
264 00:11:23 人生就要大胆说出来Listen, life is about putting it out there.
265 00:11:25 一然后一棍拍死一是吗？And then swatting it away. Isn't it?
266 00:11:26 有些时候只是说说而已Sometimes it stays out there. Where you put it.
267 00:11:29 然后有些时候直接左耳进右耳出And then sometimes it goes right into the trash.
268 00:11:30 那你们是拒绝了 我理解的So that's, like, a no. I understand.
269 00:11:32 我们得走了 很高兴见到你 戴夫I think we should go. Great to see you, Dave.
270 00:11:33 我只是说说而已 好的Just putting it out there. Yeah, okay.
271 00:11:34 很高兴见到你很高兴你还活着KATE: Nice to see you, man. I'm glad you're alive.
272 00:11:36 谢谢你 你看上去经历了很多Thank you. You look, uh, weathered.
273 00:11:38 感觉经历得太多了You look like underpass weathered.
274 00:11:40 嗯 谢谢Yeah. Thank you, I guess. Yeah.
275 00:11:42 额 话说这地方So listen, is there, like, um,
276 00:11:44 有亲友折扣吗？friends and family discount at this place?
277 00:11:46 有的 两指折扣Oh, yeah. Two finger discount.
278 00:11:49 噢…Oh...
279 00:11:51 我腿都被你说软了 还是这么风流大胆啊That made my legs feel weird. Just unbridled filth.
280 00:11:54 真恶心 你们懂的MAURA: Gross! DAVE: Hey, you know how it is.
281 00:11:56 拜 戴夫！呼！KATE: Bye, Dave! Whoo!
282 00:11:58 奥兰多我们回来了！The party just got back to O-Town!
283 00:12:00 好的！Okay!
284 00:12:03 现在是禅繁殖的季节最好把嘴闭好 呼！It's cicada season, so keep your mouth shut. Whoo!
285 00:12:09 准备好迎接我们了吗奥兰多！KATE: Are you ready for this jelly, Whorelando?
286 00:12:12 耶！Yeah!
287 00:12:16 嘿！Hey!
288 00:12:21 埃利斯姐妹入场了！Ellis sisters in the house!
289 00:12:22 嘿！Hey!
290 00:12:23 噢 满身大汗的男人 我们调戏一下Oh, sweaty man. We have to flirt.
291 00:12:25 开慢点Slow it down for a groove-by.
292 00:12:27 嘿Hey.
293 00:12:29 你干嘛呢嘿What urp? Hey.
294 00:12:31 埋你老婆？Burying your wife?
295 00:12:32 额 能请教你个问题吗？Um... Can I ask you something?
296 00:12:34 我姝妹和我 嘿My sister and I... Hey.
297 00:12:36 平时做生意很忙准备找一个”园艺艺术家”Are busy professionals, looking for an "yard artisan"
298 00:12:40 来修剪下我们的”花园”to do some work on our bushes?
299 00:12:42 你在忙我们不打扰你了抱歉You are working. We will not bother you. Sorry.
300 00:12:44 配合我一下行么Jump on my bush joke.
301 00:12:45 这是我编的 你接话下去啊I just made that up! Put another Jenga on it.
302 00:12:49 我打赌修剪别人家的”花园”I bet working on other people's
303 00:12:51 会搞得你想弄下自己的”野草”bushes really makes you wanna whack your weeds.
304 00:12:54 你这比我想像的还污That was dirtier than I thought.
305 00:12:55 抱歉 确实太污了I'm sorry. That got dirty really fast.
306 00:12:57 别抱歉 我喜欢Don't apologize, I like that.
307 00:12:58 其实这是我的房子I actually own this house.
308 00:13:00 你和你妻子住这？You live here with your wife?
309 00:13:01 你妻子都不帮你 真是个婊子Your wife's a bitch for not helping you.
310 00:13:04 额 我....JAMES: Uh, I...
311 00:13:05 其实我单身 噢I'm single, actually. Oh'
312 00:13:07 好吧我们不是在取笑你Well, we're not making fun of you.
313 00:13:09 我们只是和你调调情 因为你这确实满身大汗的We're flirting with you, because you're really sweaty.
314 00:13:11 我很看得开的 我不介意当你们的笑料I'm a solid guy. I don't mind being the butt of your jokes.
315 00:13:14 好吧 你就当我们的笑料吧Good. You will be the butt of our jokes,
316 00:13:16 因为你那美臀可不是开玩笑的because your butt is no joke.
317 00:13:18 好吧Okay.
318 00:13:19 我不是笑你屁股 我是要在你屁股里面笑MAURA: I'm not laughing at that butt. I'll laugh with your butt.
319 00:13:22 我是要在你屁股里面笑I'm gonna laugh in that butt.
320 00:13:24 我要I'm gonna laugh.
321 00:13:25 我要...我要....I'm gonna... I love to...
322 00:13:27 我的屁股也很好笑My butt's funny, too,
323 00:13:29 但你那屁股可不是开玩笑的but your butt is really serious.
324 00:13:32 你屁股简直就像1小时的电影Your butt is like an hour-long drama.
325 00:13:35 你屁股就像《监听风云》里一样Your butt's as serious as The Wire.
326 00:13:38 我的意思是 我想在DVD上看你的屁股MAURA: I mean, I can't wait to watch your butt on DVD.
327 00:13:41 我感冒了 也要看你的屁股I'm gonna binge-watch your butt when I have the flu.
328 00:13:43 该开车闪人了 好的Time to drive away. Great.
329 00:13:45 嗯额...Yeah, um, so...
330 00:13:46 有买过《Poppin Fresh Dough》吗？买过You ever buy Poppin' Fresh Dough? Yeah.
331 00:13:48 记得会发出什么声音吗？记得Remember the sound it makes? Yeah.
332 00:13:55 该这么玩才对 我的天And that's how you do it. Oh, my God.
333 00:14:05 我们家前院怎么有个已售的标志?What the hell is a sold sign doing on our front yard?
334 00:14:11 已售？Sold?
335 00:14:12 不对！No!
336 00:14:14 他们之前说只是放上市场They talked about putting it on the market.
337 00:14:16 你早就知道了 还不告诉我？Did you know about this and not tell me'?
338 00:14:18 为什么人们总是要瞒着我？Why don't people tell me things?
339 00:14:20 他们和我说过 我们当时还在考虑They spoke to me about it, and we were considering it.
340 00:14:22 他们居然把我们的童年房子卖了！They fucking sold our fucking childhood fucking home.
341 00:14:26 真不敢相信居然不问下我的意觅就卖了I can't believe they did this without consulting me.
342 00:14:28 这间房应该传给下一代This home should have been passed on.
343 00:14:31 我去劝劝他们没事的 有事好吗！I'll talk them out of it. It's okay. It's not okay!
344 00:14:34 因为我好好想出来的主意就这么没了！Because my great idea just got fucked in the a-hole!
345 00:14:37 欢迎进入我的人生！Welcome to my life!
346 00:14:41 真该死！Damn it. Shit!
347 00:14:43 操！Fuck! Shit, fuck!
348 00:14:46 千！Balls!
349 00:15:00 什么鬼....What the...
350 00:15:05 不敢相信Totally shady.
351 00:15:08 我们以前的老窗帘去哪了？Where are the curtains with the fruit on them?
352 00:15:11 她准备把这些东西都拿去送人?She was gonna give all this stuff away?
353 00:15:14 抱歉 这篮子我要留着I'm sorry, I'm keeping this colander.
354 00:15:16 太无情了KATE: Heartless.
355 00:15:17 我以前做的海牛灯呢?Where's the fucking manatee lamp I made?
356 00:15:21 对不起I'm sorry.
357 00:15:24 不是我们下的手This was not our doing.
358 00:15:29 他们准备把我们的码尺也送人?They were gonna give away the foldy yardstick?
359 00:15:31 我坚决不同意Absolutely hell no.
360 00:15:33 老妈的陶瓷鞋哪去了?Where in the hell are Mom's tiny, ceramic shoes?
361 00:15:37 这简直太过分了MAURA: This is just so not okay.
362 00:15:40 现在其他人家也能跑来玩我们的姐妹树了？So now some asshole family gets to play in our sister tree?
363 00:15:43 才不行Fuck no.
364 00:15:44 老爸老妈去哪了？Where are our parents?
365 00:15:46 这间养老院最好别一股尿骚味This nursing home better not smell urine-y, like a death-cafeteria.
366 00:15:49 像那些垃圾自助餐厅一样
367 00:15:50 这不是养老院 是老年人社区才对It's not a nursing home, it's an adult community.
368 00:15:53 名字叫《Du Soleil村>>Ifs called Village Du Soleil,
369 00:15:54 在法语里的意思就是”在阳光里”which in French means "in the sun."
370 00:15:56 老年人又不能晒太阳什么蠢名字Old people aren't supposed to be in the sun! So stupid.
371 00:15:59 老爸老妈你们咋不上天啊Yeah, Mom and Dad, eat a pyramid of dicks.
372 00:16:01 让他们坐松果去Sit on a bunch of pinecones.
373 00:16:03 如果呆会看见老妈在那种私人美容店里的话If I see Mom in one of those one-chair beauty shops,
374 00:16:05 我马上就去给烧红的钢铁做口交去I will full-out BJ a hot curling iron.
375 00:16:08 一群大吵大闹的老头老妈子坐在湖边喝酒？这简直就是地狱Rowdy seniors and booze by a lake? That's a recipe for disaster.
376 00:16:12 如果这养老院有淋浴椅If they have shower chairs at this granny farm,
377 00:16:14 我就当场歌喉然后上传到Youtube去I will slit my throat and put it on YouTube.
378 00:16:17 你没告诉我你的计划MAURA: You failed to mention your plan.
379 00:16:19 你干嘛不告诉我你已经把房子卖了？Why didn't you tell me that you sold the house?
380 00:16:22 因为我们知道你肯定会全力阻止Because we knew you'd try to talk us out of it.
381 00:16:24 你这孩子很固执的I mean, you were pushy kids.
382 00:16:25 你把钟也卖了？You're selling your clocks, by the way?
383 00:16:27 怎么 你是得绝症了吗？What, are you secretly dying?
384 00:16:29 我没得绝症 只是不想给钟上发条了No, I'm not dying. I'm just sick of winding them.
385 00:16:31 嘿 以前那个老爷钟给我Hey, I want Pop-Pop's grandfather clock.
386 00:16:33 你准备放哪?你钱包里？Where are you going to keep it? In your purse?
387 00:16:35 那房子里的东西对我们都有意叉The things in that house meant something to us.
388 00:16:38 每一样东西Each one of those objects is a puzzle piece in the story of our lives.
389 00:16:40 都是我们生命的一部分
390 00:16:43 我们只是不想让家里这么乱了We just don't want clutter anymore.
391 00:16:46 那这算什么？Then what the fuck is this?
392 00:16:47 杂乱？你们不想家里杂乱？Clutter? You don't want clutter?
393 00:16:49 杂乱是有名字的Clutter has a name.
394 00:16:51 他叫波基 圣诞树精灵And it's Pogee, the Christmas Tree Elf.
395 00:16:54 你拿去吧 我们准备买小树种上You take him. We're gonna get a tabletop tree.
396 00:17:00 真的 这地方连圣诞都过不成了！DEANNA: Honestly... MAURA: We can't have Christmas here!
397 00:17:02 打扫干净的感觉很棒It feels good to purge.
398 00:17:04 而且我们把照片全都下载下来了！And we downloaded all our pictures!
399 00:17:09 你之前把我们的婴儿照片都扔了？You threw away our baby pictures?
400 00:17:10 不是！No!
401 00:17:12 我们把照片卖给了跳蚤市场的男同性恋We sold them to the gay man at the flea market
402 00:17:15 他们把照片做成了一张张好玩的卡片who turns them into funny cards.
403 00:17:17 然后你爸爸都下载到这上面了And your father put them on this.
404 00:17:22 把这玩意插进我阴道So I just stick this up my vagina
405 00:17:23 就可以看到照片了是么？and then I can see the pictures?
406 00:17:25 凯瑟琳别这样 啥？Oh, Katherine Anne. Stop. What'?
407 00:17:27 她开玩笑的 因为你们这事太不可置信了She's being funny, because this is so crazy.
408 00:17:30 我觉得我们最好去吃顿午饭What I think we all need to do is go to lunch.
409 00:17:33 然后再好好谈谈And then we can discuss if selling the house
410 00:17:35 卖掉房子对我们来说名不明智is the best plan for us.
411 00:17:37 ”我们”都同意这个决策对吧?"Us" is happy with the decision. Mmm?
412 00:17:40 你俩去好好想想吧DEANNA: You two go whoop it up.
413 00:17:42 别不用想了木已成舟No, don't go whoop it up. It's all spiffed out.
414 00:17:44 就等周一买家过来看房了It needs to stay that way for the inspection on Monday.
415 00:17:47 如果你们想大便就去餐厅大Honestly... We can't have Christmas here!
416 00:17:49 我不能去餐厅的卫生间方便你知道的I can't go to the bathroom at restaurants. You know that.
417 00:17:53 好吧 我明白了All right, all right. I understand.
418 00:17:55 如果她能在房子里大便那我也要在房子里大便If she's gonna poop at the house, I wanna poop at the house.
419 00:17:57 对 我.....行了 你俩都可以在房子里大便Yeah... All rig ht, you can both poop at the house.
420 00:18:00 我喜欢那餐厅I like Arby's.
421 00:18:02 我们还是承认这主意糟透了好么You know, let's just all agree that this is a bad idea.
422 00:18:05 听我说 我们明晚带你们去吃晚餐Listen to me. We're gonna take you to dinner tomorrow night.
423 00:18:08 还不能在房子里呆最后一晚了？Not gonna spend one last night together in the house?
424 00:18:11 我认为.... 莫拉接受吧Okay, I think... Maura, cool it.
425 00:18:14 已经成舟了It's a done deal.
426 00:18:16 成舟了Done.
427 00:18:20 我被骗来这里就为了受这种罪？I got lured down here for this?
428 00:18:22 我现在又不用给自己收拾残局 我是成年人I don't clean up after myself anymore. I'm an adult.
429 00:18:27 这肯定苦不堪言This is gonna be deeply painful.
430 00:18:46 老天Oh, boy.
431 00:19:27 快看啊Holy shit.
432 00:19:30 给我！Gimme!
433 00:19:34 噢 快听听Ooh, listen to this.
434 00:19:35 ”我在观察布雷特给我印的”"I got in a wreck because I was admiring"
435 00:19:38 ”唇印的时候走神了”"the shoulder hickey that Brett gave me
436 00:19:39 ”结果撞上了一辆停好的车”"and got t-boned by a parked car.
437 00:19:42 ”布雷特跑过来安慰我我完全迷上了他”"Brett came over to comfort me and I'm so obsessed with him."
438 00:19:45 ”他的脸一股海风味”"His face smells like Sea Breeze"
439 00:19:47 ”他头发那么的长 我和他亲热的时候”"and his hair is so long that when I make outwith him"
440 00:19:50 ”我就当做围巾一样”"I pretend it's a scarf."
441 00:19:52 ”后言我可能怀孕了”"P.S. I might be pregnant."
442 00:19:53 这料真是太足了 读读你的That shit is juicy. Read yours.
443 00:19:56 好Okay.
444 00:20:01 ”我今天改造了我的不倒翕”"I changed the grit on my rock tumbler today."
445 00:20:04 ”紫水晶开始成型了”"The amethyst is really shaping up."
446 00:20:06 ”我准备镶嵌到领带上送给迪伦”"I'm gonna mount it in a bolo tie for Dylan."
447 00:20:09 ”他给他那受伤的脖子安了个支架”"He got a new neck brace to stretch his melting vertebrae."
448 00:20:15 ”他喜欢我送的生日卡”"He loved his birthday card."
449 00:20:17 ”特别是我怎么烧掉边缘部分的”"Especially how I burnt the edges of the scroll."
450 00:20:20 ”后言手工艺真能疗伤”"P.S. Crafting heals."
451 00:20:25 哈Huh.
452 00:20:26 ”昨晚在派对上”"Last night at the party, "
453 00:20:28 ”我跳舞太疯了 BRA都打湿了”I danced so hard my bra was soaking wet.
454 00:20:32 ”杰夫和我在调情然后他说”"Jeff and I were flirting, and then he "
455 00:20:34 ”来我给你看个宝贝”said, 'Let me show you something.'
456 00:20:36 ”然后我们来到我的房间猜猜看他给我看了啥？”"So we went to my room, and guess what he showed me?"
457 00:20:39 ”他那还戴着帽子的兄弟”"A ween that is still wearing its hat."
458 00:20:42 嗯该你了Mmm. Your mm.
459 00:20:43 哇 你在这间屋子里做了多少次爱了?Wow. How many times did you have sex in this house?
460 00:20:46 你以前也该在这嘿咻的You should have had sex here.
461 00:20:47 在自己的童年房间里嘿咻就是成人礼Having sex in your childhood bedroom is a rite of passage.
462 00:20:49 你选择当乖乖女不敢找乐子You chose the party mom role to protect yourself from fun.
463 00:20:54 不对我才不怕找乐子No! I was not afraid of fun.
464 00:20:55 来听听这个Here, check this out.
465 00:20:57 ”祝我生日快乐”"Happy birthday to me."
466 00:20:59 ”我的派对非常好玩 我梦想成真了”"My party was amazing. I got what I asked for."
467 00:21:01 ”我成为了一个生活在厄瓜多尔的孩子的资助人”"I am now a sponsor of a child in Ecuador."
468 00:21:05 ”我当晚变成了专职司机”"I was the designated driver because
469 00:21:06 ”因为我看得出大家都不想干这活”I could tell no one else wanted to be."
470 00:21:09 ”我最爱的生日礼物就是知道大家都安全到家了”"My favorite birthday gift was knowing everyone got home safe."
471 00:21:12 ”昨晚玩得太疯了简直都不敢说出口了”"Last night was so fun I can't even talk about it."
472 00:21:15 ”简直 句号 形容不了 句号”"There are no, period, words, period."
473 00:21:19 老天 我当时都不敢说出口了！Man, I couldn't even talk about it!
474 00:21:21 ”我带上我那耳聋的朋友去了希拉的音乐会”"I took my deaf friend to the Sheila E. Concert"
475 00:21:23 ”好让她感受下音乐”"so she could really feel the music."
476 00:21:25 ”她十分感激”"She was so grateful."
477 00:21:27 ”我没抽大麻”"I didn't smoke pot because
478 00:21:28 ”因为我怕不够大家抽”I was afraid there wasn't enough for everyone..."
479 00:21:30 噢 拜托Oh, come on.
480 00:21:31 我真想念以前的时光I miss those goddamn glory days.
481 00:21:33 嗯 很显然我俩的童年不一样Well, clearly' we had different experiences.
482 00:21:37 噢 这里是杰里·路易斯在电影里出现的每个镜头Oh, here's a play-by-play of a Jerry Lewis telethon.
483 00:21:40 这是我见过的所有丁丁的图表Here's a chart of all the penises I ever saw.
484 00:21:42 噢 真好 这是海伦·凯勒的全部名言Oh, good. Here's a quote from Helen Keller.
485 00:21:44 达记载的子宫内避孕器的使用方法绝对有问题Here's really incorrect information about how to put a IUD in.
486 00:21:47 这里是我栽培的室内植物的列表Here's a list of my houseplants.
487 00:21:48 放进屁股里了 嗯Put it in my butt. Ew.
488 00:21:51 我发誓我以前找了很多乐子的I swear I was having fun.
489 00:21:53 估计我之前在忙着不让你们把房子毁了吧I guess I was just making sure the house didn't get destroyed.
490 00:21:57 你居然从来没在这房间里疯过简直太遗憾了It's a damn shame that you never had your night here.
491 00:22:04 我们不能办派对We cannot have a party.
492 00:22:06 派对？A party?
493 00:22:08 一这主义真不错一不行That's a great idea. No.
494 00:22:09 你不能一直逃避躲在壳里You can't avoid putting yourself out there forever!
495 00:22:12 你以后肯定古老终生的You're gonna dry up like a granny apple doll.
496 00:22:14 这房子已经被卖了The house is sold.
497 00:22:16 别 没用的No, it's networking.
498 00:22:17 凯特！别扮小狗脸Kate! Don't make that face.
499 00:22:19 别软磨硬泡的！我讨厌你让我感觉自己很杀气氛Do not work me like this! I hate it when you make me the bummer.
500 00:22:24 我的人生现在非常不顺我想再体验下开心的感觉My life is super shitty right now. I need to feel happy again.
501 00:22:29 啊.....Ah...
502 00:22:30 行 那我们把牙刷好Fine. Let's just brush our remaining teeth
503 00:22:33 然后就当过完2个老女人的一天了and call it a sad, hard day for two dusty old twats.
504 00:22:37 因为我们已经完了Because we're done.
505 00:22:45 从离婚的阴影走出来好好找找乐子 真的很简单Also? P.S. It would be such an easy way for you to pop your post-divorce flirt cherry.
506 00:22:51 我真想看看你玩乐的样子I would love to see you let it rip.
507 00:22:53 你这妹妹简直又有趣又不有趣You're such a fun as shit little sister.
508 00:22:56 我确实挺有趣的I really am so fun.
509 00:22:58 真不该这样自己藏着掖着 确实不该I shouldn't keep that to myself. No, you shouldn't!
510 00:23:07 我觉得我们真该那么做I think maybe we should do it.
511 00:23:10 听不清Can't hear you.
512 00:23:11 我说 我们真该办个派对I said maybe we should have a party.
513 00:23:13 说我想听的 妹子！KATE: Say what I wanna hear, girl!
514 00:23:15 老天 不知道！Oh, my God. I don't know!
515 00:23:17 好吧 来吧 我们办派对！Okay, let's do it. Let's have a party!
516 00:23:22 噢 你可以邀请那个邻居Oh, and you can invite that cute neighbor guy
517 00:23:24 然后你俩终于可以在你那小床上嘿咻了！and you can finally have sex in your old, crappo bed!
518 00:23:26 嗯 但他比我年轻Yeah, but he's younger than me.
519 00:23:27 是 但他比你高 这才是最重要的Yeah, but he's taller than you, and that's all that matters.
520 00:23:29 天呐 我需要好好疯一晚找回状态！Oh, my God. I need this night to reset myself!
521 00:23:32 我们要办派对了！We are having a party!
522 00:23:54 你睡得如何？How'd you sleep?
523 00:23:55 我梦到我没工作也没住处I dreamt I had no job and no place to live.
524 00:23:58 等下Oh, wait.
525 00:23:59 海莉发照片给我了Got a picture from Haley.
526 00:24:02 她朋友家有那种高档壁炉Well, Her friend has a fancy-ass fireplace in her house.
527 00:24:05 不对 这里是那种卖三明治的店No, it's one of those Cosi Sandwich Shops.
528 00:24:08 谁在家门前啊？Oh. Who the crap is that'?
529 00:24:13 他们就是买房的？Are those the new owners?
530 00:24:15 嗯杀了我吧 真恶心！Ew. Fuck my life. MAURA: Gross!
531 00:24:16 我希望前院能空间升阔一点I want the front yard to be open-concept.
532 00:24:19 那棵老树得搬走That old tree has gotta go.
533 00:24:21 你说的可是Oh, you just try to
534 00:24:22 我们的姐妹树你个混球take down our sister tree, you stupid stinkbug!
535 00:24:25 我在这都能闻到那婊子的睹喱水I can smell that bitch's hairspray from here.
536 00:24:27 不行 他们可不能这样大摇大摆的赶我们出去No, they can't fucking roll in here like Jehovah's Witnesses!
537 00:24:30 太粗鲁了Rude.
538 00:24:33 干嘛？What?
539 00:24:35 能帮你们什么忙吗？是的Can we help you? Yes.
540 00:24:36 我们的秘书没说有人要来拜访Our secretary didn't tell us that we had an appointment.
541 00:24:39 噢 我叫帕特里克·坎贝尔他们是简和亨利·基尔Oh, I'm Patrick Campbell. This is Jane and Henry Geernt.
542 00:24:41 他们准备从纽约市搬过来 准备买下这间房They' re relocating from New York City and buying this house.
543 00:24:44 那你是他们的翻译师?So, are you their interpreter?
544 00:24:46 如果是的话 请带我们向他们问好If so, please tell them hello for us.
545 00:24:49 他们只是想来看看They just want to see
546 00:24:49 这阳台和蓝色搭不搭what these blues look like on the sun porch.
547 00:24:51 什么意思?阳台 对What do you mean? Sun porch? Mmm-hmm.
548 00:24:53 你够年龄贷按揭吗？Are you even old enough to get a mortgage?
549 00:24:55 当然但是我们准备拿现金买Oh, yes. But we're buying it with cash.
550 00:24:58 你要把阳台喷漆？不行You're painting the sun porch? No.
551 00:25:01 白色对我们来说有点太”农村”了It's a little "country" for us.
552 00:25:04 能麻烦你们转告你们的父母吗Can you let your parents know that
553 00:25:06 如果这万一周一还没修好if things like this aren't fixed by Monday,
554 00:25:08 那这笔买卖就不用做了we're gonna have a real issue following through with the sale.
555 00:25:12 是的 不修不行Yeah. That won't be okay.
556 00:25:14 我有个问题I got a question.
557 00:25:15 你的所有衣服里有多少百分比是需要干洗的？What percentage of your ward robe is dry clean only?
558 00:25:18 87%Seventy-eight?
559 00:25:19 感觉你俩穿的衣服都是亚麻布做的You guys seem like you wear a lot of linen.
560 00:25:22 到底是哪种白痴才会去给阳台喷漆？What kind of hot moron paints a sun porch?
561 00:25:24 你干嘛不Why don't you just put
562 00:25:25 在卧室里修间厕所就算了？a toilet in the living room and call it a day?
563 00:25:27 简直疯了！Crazy!
564 00:25:28 你这是在美邦买的裙子？Is that dress from Target?
565 00:25:29 额不是.... 我在美邦见过这条裙子Um, no... 'Cause I've seen one like it at Target.
566 00:25:32 我没去美邦买过衣服I've never been there before.
567 00:25:33 你知道这里有过杀人案 对吧？You know there was a murder here, right?
568 00:25:35 啥?我不知道No. What? I don't.
569 00:25:37 邪教杀人案Major cult stuff. Yeah.
570 00:25:38 多人死亡？What, like a mass murder?
571 00:25:40 一大概7个？一好吧Seven? Okay.
572 00:25:43 7对双胞胎Seven sets of twins.
573 00:25:44 所以说是14个 抱歉啥？So, 14. I'm sorry. What?
574 00:25:46 你知道你表哥是Gay对吧？You know your cousin's gay, right?
575 00:25:47 那不是我表哥那是我丈夫That's not my cousin. That's my husband.
576 00:25:49 那是你丈夫?That's your husband?
577 00:25:50 那你10年后就准备迎接惊喜吧You're gonna have some surprising shit go down in about 10 years.
578 00:25:53 你有没有感觉你现在就买房太早了？You ever feel like maybe you peaked too soon?
579 00:25:55 我不达么感觉 人生还长着呢No, I don't. 'Cause ifs a long life.
580 00:25:58 我可不想看到你40岁的时候只能在大街上给流浪汉口交赚钱And I would hate to see you out there blowing hobos at 40.
581 00:26:02 谢谢关心Thank you.
582 00:26:03 蓝色？Blue?
583 00:26:04 到底哪种疯子会把木头染成蓝色?What would possess a person to paint stained wood blue?
584 00:26:06 怎么 你从小在船上长大的吗？What, were you raised on a tugboat?
585 00:26:08 我呆会就把油漆拉过来涂 除非你们在阳台上睡觉I'll drop off the paint later. Unless you'll be day-napping.
586 00:26:12 我们睡觉都是睁着眼睡的 像鲨鱼一样We sleep with our eyes open, like sharks.
587 00:26:18 拜！很高兴见到你们！Bye! Nice to meet you!
588 00:26:20 以后再闻你MAURA: Smell you later.
589 00:26:22 谁会姓基尔啊？What kind of last name is Geernt?
590 00:26:24 基尔 感觉就是个娘炮名字Geernt. Sounds like a queef on a yoga ball.
591 00:26:26 嗯 应该是Yeah. More like
592 00:26:27 要拉裤子里之前的那种先兆声音the last sound you hear before you shit your pants.
593 00:26:31 老天啊 老天啊Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
594 00:26:33 好的 我们开始弄邀请函吧Okay. Let's start working on those invites.
595 00:26:47 好 来看看有谁 好Okay, let's see who we got. Okay.
596 00:26:49 薇斯卡·巴斯提奥 嗯Vicka Bastione. MAURA: Yeah.
597 00:26:52 不要阿历克斯 他老是在搞笑 讨厌得要死No on Alex. He's always on. It's annoying as fuck.
598 00:26:55 我知道他很2 不过他很希望变成幽默的人I know. He breaks my heart. He wants to be funny, though.
599 00:26:58 嗯 地狱的人还想喝冰水呢Yeah, well, people in hell want ice water, too.
600 00:27:00 戴夫 我和他上床是因为他某方面很性感Dave. I did him because he disgusted me in a sexy way.
601 00:27:04 西班牙矮男总把我当齐娜Short Hispanic guys always acted like I was Xena.
602 00:27:08 我打赌他收到的酒醉罚单都50张了I bet he has, like, 50 DUls right now.
603 00:27:10 布林达绝对不能来KATE: Brinda is a hard no.
604 00:27:13 这怪物和她朋友决不来That monster and her minions are not coming.
605 00:27:15 她怎么怪兽了？Why is she a monster?
606 00:27:16 她自己清楚KATE: She knows what she did.
607 00:27:18 好的 罗伯和丽兹Okay. Rob and Liz!
608 00:27:19 他们以前总在各种奇葩地点嘿咻They used to have sex in the weirdest places.
609 00:27:21 在毕业典礼上他居然在她身后就放进去了He took her from behind in line at graduation.
610 00:27:24 他们确实需要来场派对 他们已经找不到乐子了They could use a party. They are terminally suburban.
611 00:27:27 凯莉 这婊子可会玩了KATE: Kelly. That bitch is fun.
612 00:27:29 对 凯莉可会玩了！Yeah. Kelly is fun!
613 00:27:30 凯莉可会玩了Kelly is fun.
614 00:27:40 那么 我们该出发了！还有好多事要做So, we should go! We have so much to do.
615 00:27:42 你得去邀请那个浑身湿透的汉子You have to invite that cute guy from down the street.
616 00:27:44 嗯 或许吧 再说Mmm. Maybe. I don't know. We'll see.
617 00:28:00 祝你今天愉快弗兰Have a great day, Fran.
618 00:28:04 老天啊 是布林达Oh, my God. It's Brinda.
619 00:28:06 嗯....Ugh...
620 00:28:07 总感觉布林达老是憋着个屁没放Brinda always looks like she has a fart coming out sideways.
621 00:28:10 我感觉没邀请她挺过不去的I feel bad that we didn't invite her.
622 00:28:12 我讨厌那种没有被邀请的感觉I hate it when people aren't included.
623 00:28:14 老天 万一她过来问我们能不能来派对的话怎么办？Oh, God. What if she asks us to come to the party?
624 00:28:16 我当着她的面可拒绝不了她I'm not gonna be able to say no to her face.
625 00:28:18 你知道我不会拒绝人的我养的狗只有一个眼睛呢You know I can't reject people. I have a dog with one eye.
626 00:28:20 她来了 她在接近我们Here she comes. She's coming close. She's right here.
627 00:28:21 她快到了 她到了She's almost here. She's here now.
628 00:28:23 嘿布林达 还好吗？Hey, Brinda. What up'?
629 00:28:25 瞧瞧啊Well, well, well.
630 00:28:27 我就想着是不是埃利斯姐妹呢I thought I saw the Ellis sisters.
631 00:28:29 嘿 布林达 你最近干嘛呢?Hey, Brinda. What have you been up to?
632 00:28:32 不是指派对 指的是生活Not party-wise, just life in general.
633 00:28:35 没做什么 只是你懂的努力开展生涯Not much. Just, you know, building a career.
634 00:28:38 作为成功人士 享受着充实美好的每一天Being successful and having a really full and wonderful life.
635 00:28:43 我运气真好I'm very blessed.
636 00:28:44 你们肯定在城里也看到了I'm sure you've seen around town,
637 00:28:46 我现在可是十分成功的房产经纪人I'm a pretty successful realtor now.
638 00:28:48 公交车站牌都是我的广告I'm plastered all over the bus stops.
639 00:28:50 一恭喜一谢谢Congratulations. Thank you.
640 00:28:52 我还以为你失踪了 我在公交站牌看到你的照片的时候I thought you were missing. I saw your picture on the bus stop.
641 00:28:54 我只想着你失踪了I just assumed you were missing.
642 00:28:55 你们呢 你们准备干嘛？啥乜不做？And you? What are you up to'? Nothing?
643 00:28:59 我们正准备去收容所 把这些派对食物给他们We are on the way to a shelter to give people this party food.
644 00:29:05 噢 所以你们才穿的像流浪汉一样?Oh, is that why you're dressed like the homeless?
645 00:29:07 你买了什么?大便软化剂?What are you buying? Stool softener?
646 00:29:09 其实是健怡可乐No. Actually, um, Diet Coke.
647 00:29:11 我看到你还买了健身板Got some Poise Pads in there I see.
648 00:29:14 不错还买了菊花膏吗？没Good. Little asshole cream. No.
649 00:29:16 你看起来真漂亮啊这腰带真时髦Don't you look great. That's a snazzy belt.
650 00:29:19 噢 谢谢！Oh, thank you!
651 00:29:20 嗯 恭喜你拿到了摔跤冠军Yeah, congrats on your wrestling championship.
652 00:29:23 这可是”拉夫·劳伦”It's Ralph Lauren.
653 00:29:24 是这么发音吗？嗯是Is that how you say it? Uh, yeah.
654 00:29:26 戴上这玩意WIFI信号要好些？Do you get good Wi-Fi with that?
655 00:29:28 看上去你们要办派对So I see you're having a party.
656 00:29:30 我们只是买点东西…I mean, we're just kind of picking...
657 00:29:31 是的办派对 是的Yep. Having a party. Yeah.
658 00:29:33 我从某个被邀请的人那听说I heard you were having a party.
659 00:29:35 你们要办派对From someone who got invited.
660 00:29:38 我们也准备邀请你的 但完全没有你的联系方式You were on our list, but you're very hard to track down.
661 00:29:40 你有Email吗？Are you on email?
662 00:29:42 额 是B．Rinda_Uh, it's B-dot-rinda...
663 00:29:44 原来是错在这里 我忘记”点”了That's what I did wrong. I forgot the dot.
664 00:29:47 而且还忘记输入了And we forgot to type it.
665 00:29:48 而且还忘记寄出了And also we didn't send it.
666 00:29:50 我得承认I must admit,
667 00:29:52 当我听说你们要办埃利斯姐妹派对的时候when I heard you were having an Ellis Island party
668 00:29:54 我当时表情是”啥？这都什么年代了?”I was like, "What? What year is it?"
669 00:29:56 真悲伤啊It's pretty sad.
670 00:29:59 在以前我会很伤心It used to hurt me when
671 00:30:00 你们从不邀请我去你们的派对you never invited me to any of your parties,
672 00:30:02 但后来我想了很多还有点祷告but I did a lot of thinking and a little bit of prayer,
673 00:30:08 而现在我只感觉你俩挺悲哀的and now I just feel sort of bad for you two.
674 00:30:10 懂吧 因为你俩这是穷途末路了You know, because it's such a desperate event.
675 00:30:14 舞iBye.
676 00:30:19 你才穷途末路了！You're a desperate event!
677 00:30:21 我还没出大门呢！I can still hear you!
678 00:30:22 很好 那你听听这个看看?KATE: Good. Can you hear this?
679 00:30:24 吃我大属吧！Suck a fucking bag of dicks!
680 00:30:25 这么小声她听不到She can't hear that.
681 00:30:27 穿这么时髦走路这么骚Strutting around Big Lots like it's Bloomingdale's
682 00:30:29 一看就是贱人in her bullshit shoes.
683 00:30:31 搞房地产的贱人还觉得自己了不起Real estate bitch acting like Suze Orman.
684 00:30:34 知道她脸上有啥么？睫毛上都沾眼屎了You know what she has? Crabs in her eyebrows.
685 00:30:36 肥得像头猪一样Tumbleweeds rolling across her beav.
686 00:30:38 我简直懒得跟她废话了I am done wasting words on that ho.
687 00:30:41 抱歉维姬 不要替我道歉I'm sorry, Vicky. Don't apologize for me.
688 00:30:45 维姬是你的真名？Is Vicky your real name?
689 00:30:47 你的韩国名叫什么？What's your Korean name?
690 00:30:53 Hae-WonHae-Won.
691 00:30:54 Hae-Won达名字真美丽是什么意思？Hae-Won. What a beautiful name. What does that mean?
692 00:30:57 Hae-Won的意思是”头”Hae-Won mean "head".
693 00:30:59 噢Oh.
694 00:31:01 Hae-Won?是这么发音吗？Has-Won? Am I saying it correctly?
695 00:31:04 Hae-WonHae-Won.
696 00:31:05 噢Hae-WonOh, Hae-Won.
697 00:31:07 不对Hae-WonNo. Hae-Won.
698 00:31:09 HaeWonHae-Won.
699 00:31:10 不是Hae-Won Hae-WonNot Hae-Won. Hae-Won.
700 00:31:14 - Hae-Won -不对Hae-WonHae-Won. No. Hae-Won.
701 00:31:16 Hae—Won Hae-WonHae-Won. Hae-Won.
702 00:31:18 Hae-Won Hae-WonHae-Won. Hae-Won.
703 00:31:20 感觉我说的是对的不对？I feel like I'm saying it right. No?
704 00:31:23 发音太高了Hae-Hae-WonI'm too high. Hae-Hae-Won.
705 00:31:26 嗯Yes.
706 00:31:27 感觉还是没说对 不过我能说好的It's not coming out right, but I'll get it.
707 00:31:29 就像”我要开派对了”Like, "I'm having fun at party."
708 00:31:32 ”Hey”加个”One”"Hey." Plus "one."
709 00:31:35 Hey oneHey one.
710 00:31:38 你喜欢派对吗 是的So you like parties. HAE-WON: Yes.
711 00:31:40 嗯Hmm.
712 00:31:41 你叫什么？我叫莫拉Your name? Oh, my name is Maura.
713 00:31:44 马拉Maura.
714 00:31:45 看我嘴莫拉Watch me. Maura.
715 00:31:46 马拉Maura.
716 00:31:48 我嘴可没张这么大莫拉I don't open my mouth like that. Just, Maura.
717 00:31:51 马拉Maura.
718 00:31:52 不是马拉It's not Maura.
719 00:31:54 看到我们嘴型的区别了么？莫拉You see the difference in my mouth? Maura.
720 00:31:57 马拉Maura.
721 00:31:58 我们嘴型不同We have different mouths.
722 00:31:59 没关系的It's okay.
723 00:32:04 为什么这群人总是要给她们取美国名字 真悲伤Why do they always have to give them American names? It's so sad.
724 00:32:08 我打赌那经理把她们当妓女对待I bet Nail Pimp Daddy over there treats them like his whores.
725 00:32:11 我们得叫刘玉林 凌志慧才对We need to get Lucy Liu to go under... Lisa Ling.
726 00:32:13 得叫凌志慧潜入Lisa Ling to go undercover and investigate these dirty-ass nail salons.
727 00:32:14 这些黑美甲店调查下才行
728 00:32:16 她们可是正常聘请的员工 而你自己就有指甲美容执照But they are hiring and you are licensed to do nails.
729 00:32:20 我可不想在这工作 他们居然在鱼缸里养鲈鱼I don't wanna work here. They have a bass in their aquarium.
730 00:32:23 这里这么漂亮 空气里还一股薰衣草的味道It's beautiful here. Everything smells like lavender.
731 00:32:26 而且 你还能给他们当老师你可厉害的Plus, you could leach them a lot, because you know your shit.
732 00:32:28 我确实很厉害I do know my shit.
733 00:32:30 老娘的修指甲功夫可不是吹的I could French manicure a chicken while it was running away.
734 00:32:34 估计等我们安顿下来我事业也会好一点 对吧？Guess I could get something better once we're settled, right?
735 00:32:36 完全正确 然后在找到更好的工作之前Exactly! And then just wait until you get that better job
736 00:32:40 别把这份辞了before you quit this one.
737 00:32:42 我要去找新工作了I'm open to new ways.
738 00:32:46 你姐妹？Your sister?
739 00:32:47 是昀 我姐妹Yes, that's my sister.
740 00:32:49 你是姐姐You're older.
741 00:32:50 才不是 就是No. Yes.
742 00:32:53 你干嘛这么说？Why would you say that?
743 00:32:54 你的脸Your face.
744 00:32:55 噢Oh.
745 00:32:57 更老Older.
746 00:32:58 才不是 就是No. Yes.
747 00:32:59 好吧Okay.
748 00:33:02 那么 你喜欢在这工作吗？So, do you like working here?
749 00:33:04 我很喜欢I love it.
750 00:33:08 你有午餐休息时间吗?Do you get proper lunch breaks?
751 00:33:09 什么是”午餐”？What is lunch?
752 00:33:11 我去 太可怜了Oh, my God. That's terrible.
753 00:33:13 嘿Hey.
754 00:33:15 很感谢你们的服务这地方真不错Thank you so much for this. This is a great place.
755 00:33:17 不用谢Of course.
756 00:33:21 额 我看到你们在招人So, uh, I see you're hiring.
757 00:33:25 噢 我们现在没在招人Oh, we are not hiring right now.
758 00:33:28 你那有个招人牌子You just got a big old sign.
759 00:33:31 Hae-Won 你今晚想来参加派对吗？Hey, Hae-Won. Would you like to come to a party tonight?
760 00:33:35 你和你朋友都来玩 好吗？You and your friends come, okay?
761 00:33:37 去做美甲？To do nail?
762 00:33:38 不对不对 是参加派对Oh, no. No, no, no. Party?
763 00:33:41 你想带谁都行You can bring whoever you want.
764 00:33:42 派对 可以Party, yes.
765 00:33:44 Sojus 犹太人Sojus. Jews.
766 00:33:47 那有Soju吗？当然会有犹太人Soju there? Sure. There'll be Jews there.
767 00:33:49 我喜欢jus韩国人都喜欢jusLove jus. Koreans love jus.
768 00:33:52 韩国人喜欢犹太人Koreans love Jews.
769 00:33:54 我喜欢jus -我也喜欢犹太人I love jus. I love Jews, too.
770 00:33:55 lUSJus.
771 00:33:57 亚当也在考虑来玩加百利也要来所以说…Adam is thinking of coming, and Gabe is on the fence, so...
772 00:34:00 SojuSoju.
773 00:34:01 我怕我们说的不是同一个东西I'm worried we aren't talking about the same thing.
774 00:34:04 饮料喝的饮料 JusJuice. Drinking juice. HAE-WON: Jus.
775 00:34:06 你真笨You stupid.
776 00:34:07 到时候那里有饮料There'll be juice there.
777 00:34:08 也有食物 还有犹太人There'll be food there. There'll be Jews there.
778 00:34:10 那我去 太好了Okay. Yes. Great.
779 00:34:12 听着 我女儿和我要搬来奥兰多Okay, listen. My daughter and I are moving to Orlando
780 00:34:15 我真的很需要一份工作and I really need a job.
781 00:34:17 噢 不行Oh, no.
782 00:34:22 好的 听着 微笑然后和我握手 表现得你像雇了我一样Okay, look. Just smile and shake my hand like you gave me a job
783 00:34:25 这样我就发张我的大胸照片给你看and I will text you a picture of my boobs.
784 00:34:27 很漂亮的 又挺又美Real good ones. High and happy.
785 00:34:29 不要？看来我把你性取向搞错了No? I misread your deal.
786 00:34:31 微笑然后和我握手Smile and shake my hand.
787 00:34:32 否则我就把我的大胸照片给你看or I will text you a picture of my boobs,
788 00:34:34 我知道你肯定不想看and I know you don't wanna see them.
789 00:34:38 太好了！谢谢你维姬Awesome! Thank you, Vicky.
790 00:34:40 那周一见了I will see you on Monday.
791 00:34:43 崩！我找到工作了Boom! I got a job.
792 00:34:45 看看我在钱包里翻出了啥And look what I pulled out of your wallet.
793 00:34:47 ”成功就是工作的追求”"Success is desire in action."
794 00:34:48 太棒了！你真厉害！Amazing! You're crushing it!
795 00:34:50 呼！Whoo!
796 00:34:51 我们得取消和老爸老妈的晚餐We need to cancel dinner with Mom and Dad.
797 00:34:53 我佃对老爸老妈撒谎他们睡觉的时候猝死了怎么办What if we lie to Mom and Dad and then they die in their sleep?
798 00:34:56 别让他们看穿你的内疚了Don't let them smell your guilt.
799 00:34:59 女儿们Girls.
800 00:35:01 嗨 妈妈 我们在房子那边可卖力了Hey, Mom, we are doing so much work over there
801 00:35:03 而且没做其他事 我说的是实话and doing nothing else, and I am telling the truth.
802 00:35:06 好吧Well.
803 00:35:07 我正在把这些银餐具收进抽屉里I was just, urn, putting the silverware in the drawers here.
804 00:35:11 额 我们今晚不能去吃晚餐了Hey, we can't have dinner tonight.
805 00:35:13 对 我们整理模式全开Yeah, because we're in such packing mode we
806 00:35:15 可不想断了节奏don't wanna stop our groove.
807 00:35:19 听上去不错！Sounds good!
808 00:35:34 噢Oh.
809 00:35:35 我们还是....No. We've...
810 00:35:37 好的！Okay!
811 00:35:38 拜我们走了！Bye. We're leaving!
812 00:35:40 我们刚才那是打断父母嘿咻了？Did we just cock block our parents'?
813 00:35:42 他们还真有活力They were fresh off the sex griddle.
814 00:35:44 她脸上那浓妆都逆天了There was so much color in her face.
815 00:35:48 嘿 今晚见 我可是做足了准备的Hey, see you tonight! You know, I'm laying down a bread base.
816 00:35:51 我想花几分钟去山姆和克雷家 很快就好So I wanna stop by Sam and Gray's house, real quick.
817 00:35:53 从高中之后我就没见过那对同性恋了Oh, I haven't seen those homos since high school!
818 00:35:55 我知道I know.
819 00:35:56 他们说的我们可以 借走他们婚礼上的那种漂亮椅子They said that we could borrow those cool chairs they had at their wedding.
820 00:35:59 同性恋真知道怎么办派对Gays know how to throw a party.
821 00:36:01 去科思科超市 弄一锅香辣鸡翅Go to Costco, get a pan of hot wings.
822 00:36:05 然后买大份萨拉米思Get some big, basic salamis.
823 00:36:07 或者直接弄一大盆土豆沙拉Or just make a fuckload of potato salad.
824 00:36:10 然后加点托斯蒂多滋With Tostitos Scoops.
825 00:36:11 那东西就像能吃的勺子一样It's like a spoon you can eat.
826 00:36:14 很显然是男同性恋才会办派对Obviously, it's the gay men who have the great party ideas.
827 00:36:19 我真希望是可以选择变成Gay的I wish being gay was a choice because
828 00:36:20 我真喜欢它们那紧身装扮I always did like that shorts and boots look.
829 00:36:22 嗯 我懂Yeah, I don't know.
830 00:36:23 对我来说 我不能接受的是阴道吃阴道For me, the deal breaker might be the eating of the pussy.
831 00:36:25 是吗？对我来说Oh, really? Because for me it would
832 00:36:27 我受不了的是只能聊天不做事just be the fucking unbearable amount of talking.
833 00:36:29 拜了！BYE, guys!
834 00:36:38 嗯你怎么想布雷拉Hmm, what do you think, Brayla?
835 00:36:39 穿你身上非常漂亮That looks amazing on you.
836 00:36:42 我之前还没见过叫布雷拉的人呢I never met a Brayla before.
837 00:36:44 我认识大概3个I know, like, three.
838 00:36:45 那这名字还挺流行哈 真不错Oh, so you're trending. God bless.
839 00:36:48 虽然奶头有点紧You know, it's a lot of under teat
840 00:36:50 不过我还挺喜欢的but I think I'm getting away with it.
841 00:36:53 额 你穿反了Also it's, um, on backwards.
842 00:36:58 是吗？ 是的You think? Yeah.
843 00:37:00 你试穿如何了？How's it going in there?
844 00:37:02 我真不懂这裙子I don't get this dress.
845 00:37:04 我左胸一直往外面跑One of my apples keeps rolling out of the bag.
846 00:37:07 但我还挺喜欢这种半露的感觉的But I like the story it tells with the fringe.
847 00:37:10 你得加条皮带才行You're gonna have to rock a thong with this, though.
848 00:37:12 不 我不穿皮带的 我穿衣品味很挑Oh, no, I don't wear thongs. I have a very fussy taint.
849 00:37:15 那你得把要腰束下 对吧 布雷拉?You just have to build up a callus. Right, Brayla?
850 00:37:17 穿你身上非常溧亮That looks amazing on you.
851 00:37:20 我估计她只关心卖出与否I worry that she just wants the sale.
852 00:37:21 她说的不是实话She's not telling us the truth.
853 00:37:22 不对布雷拉大脑里没有愉快中枢No. Brayla has no pleasure center in her brain.
854 00:37:26 噢 原来是这样Oh, here we go.
855 00:37:27 海莉 你在哪呢？Haley! How-slash-where are you?
856 00:37:30 你完全可以信任我HALEY: You can trust me.
857 00:37:32 我在朋友家I am at a friend's house.
858 00:37:33 我收到了你的短信So I go! Your text message
859 00:37:35 说是要搬去和外公外婆住about moving in with Gram and Gramps,
860 00:37:37 你知道我可喜欢奥拉多了and you know I love Orlando.
861 00:37:39 我要兴奋死了！I'm super excited about this!
862 00:37:41 嗯 我之前也很兴奋Yeah, you know what? I was real excited about it, too,
863 00:37:43 结果发现奶奶爷爷把房子卖了and it turns out that Gram and Gramps are selling their house.
864 00:37:46 噢..........Oh...
865 00:37:48 好的 我喜欢这上面印了个强势的单词Okay, I like that it has a strong message,
866 00:37:51 但是紧得我拉链都拉到”花园”了but I am afraid that I'm gonna zip my bush up in there.
867 00:37:53 我们还是可以搬来奥兰多的We can still make Orlando happen.
868 00:37:55 我保证 我会另找方法I promise, I will find another way.
869 00:37:58 别伤心Don't be upset.
870 00:38:00 电话给我Okay, give it to me.
871 00:38:02 嗨宝贝我是莫拉 嗨Hey, honey. It's Maura. Hey.
872 00:38:04 听着你妈妈忘了说最重要的部分了Listen, your morn forgot to tell you the most important part,
873 00:38:06 她在这找到了份工作一个非常高档的美甲店which is that she got a job out here at a very fancy nail salon.
874 00:38:11 真的？是的Really? MAURA: Yes.
875 00:38:12 去试试衣服Try something on.
876 00:38:13 所以我认为So I think maybe
877 00:38:15 你应该这周赶过来给她个惊喜you should come here earlier next week, and surprise her.
878 00:38:19 她想死你了She really misses you.
879 00:38:20 莫拉阿姨 我不知道能不能去Aunt Maura, I don't know. I don't know.
880 00:38:23 海莉 我说的我可以暂时帮你Haley, I know I said that I was going to help you for a while,
881 00:38:26 但你现在得和你妈妈团聚了but now you have to get back with your mother.
882 00:38:28 我讨厌向别人保密I hate keeping secrets.
883 00:38:30 特别是对我姐姐 我感觉内疚死了Especially from my sister. It gives me guilt diarrhea.
884 00:38:33 好吧 那”波伦塔”怎么办？Okay. But what should I do with Polenta?
885 00:38:37 狗保姆的号码在柜台上MAURA: The dog-sitters number is on the counter.
886 00:38:40 用我的信用卡买张机票 飞到这来Use my credit card, and get a flight, and come here.
887 00:38:43 这次你俩会和好的 宝贝 我保证It's gonna work this time, honey, I promise.
888 00:38:46 好吧既然你都这么说了Okay, if you think so.
889 00:38:48 我爱你 我也爱你I love you. Love you, too.
890 00:38:49 拜Bye.
891 00:38:52 海莉很好 没什么事Haley's good. It's all fine.
892 00:38:54 太棒了 谢谢Aw. That's awesome. Thanks.
893 00:38:56 这些裙子是给中国女汉子穿的These dresses are made for Chinese tomboys, by the way.
894 00:38:59 不好说I don't know about that one.
895 00:39:00 是吗 看看这部分Really, because what about this part?
896 00:39:04 这里简直就是表达我是女汉子That's a Play-Doh Fun Factory right there. Ooh.
897 00:39:08 眼睛都被这里吸引了 确实And the eye goes right to it. Yeah, look at that.
898 00:39:13 屁股都露出来了 男生最喜欢了That is flesh, and dudes like that. They don't care what thing it's coming out of.
899 00:39:15 他们可不在乎是谁的屁股
900 00:39:18 这裙子一股棒子泡菜味MAURA: This dress smells like pickles.
901 00:39:19 最好管用Better work.
902 00:39:20 决定不了买这条还是那条It just feels like it's maybe one or the other.
903 00:39:21 你语法都再错了I think it's what they call "either/and."
904 00:39:23 额别拉…No, I don't. Well...
905 00:39:25 对吧 布雷拉？布雷拉 你是哪的人？Right, Brayla? Brayla, where you from?
906 00:39:27 穿你身上非常漂亮 嗯哼That looks amazing on you. BOTH: Mmm-hmm.
907 00:39:30 我们换家店吧这家店服务太差了We got to find another store, they can't handle our heat here.
908 00:39:32 老天我们要选的衣服不是God. We need, like, a little less
909 00:39:33 ”永远的21岁”而是”一眨眼就42岁了”"Forever 21" and a little more "Suddenly 42."
910 00:39:36 对得穿紧身显身材Yeah. We are keeping it tight.
911 00:39:39 确实很紧紧得不行It is tight. This is very tight.
912 00:39:41 来亲一个Here, give me a kiss.
913 00:39:50 等下我们去哪？最后一站MAURA: Wait. Where are we going? KATE: One last errand.
914 00:39:57 上吧妹子 啥？Get it, girl. What?
915 00:39:59 老天 我就知道你从没主动要求过开车Oh, my God. Damn it. I knew it! You never offer to drive.
916 00:40:03 去约他吧”欲望需要踏出第一步”Ask him. "Desire needs action," or whatever the fuck that one said.
917 00:40:04 记不清那破卡片上写的啥了
918 00:40:06 我可没穿漂亮的BRA 我满嘴牛肉干味I don't have my good bra on. I have beef jerky breath.
919 00:40:09 知道了 知道了Okay. Okay.
920 00:40:12 嗨 嗨Hi. Hi.
921 00:40:15 我叫莫拉 住在那边I'm, uh, Maura, from yonder there.
922 00:40:18 我和我姐姐昨天调戏了你My sister and I objectified you yesterday?
923 00:40:21 我记得你I remember you.
924 00:40:23 我叫詹姆斯 嗨詹姆斯I'm James. Hi, James.
925 00:40:25 小明叫吉米吗？Do you go by Jimmy?
926 00:40:26 通常都叫詹姆斯 有时候也叫詹姆斯Usually James, sometimes James.
927 00:40:29 好吧 我只是过来打声招呼仅此而已那么…Well, just wanted to say hello. And that's all I got, so.
928 00:40:36 额…Uh...
929 00:40:38 能借用下你的厕所吗?Would you borrow me your bathroom?
930 00:40:41 只是小便Number one only.
931 00:40:43 没问题进来吧Of course, come in.
932 00:40:43 你在里面拉大拉小都行You can do whatever you want in there, really.
933 00:40:45 哇Wow.
934 00:40:46 我在翻新房子 准备放上房地产市场卖掉I am actually just renovating it, I'm gonna put it on the market.
935 00:40:50 哇你翻得真不错 谢谢Wow. You're doing a really nice job. Oh, thank you.
936 00:40:53 这是我父母的房子It was my parents' house,
937 00:40:54 但他们在1年内相继去世了but they passed away within a year of each other.
938 00:40:56 天呐 太可怕了Oh, my God. That's horrible.
939 00:40:59 嗯 是很悲伤Yeah. Yeah, it was really sad.
940 00:41:03 你没事吧？Are you gonna be okay?
941 00:41:05 抱歉 只是这是我最怕发生的事I'm sorry. It's just that's, like, my worst fear.
942 00:41:07 抱歉说给你听这么不吉利的事I'm sorry I told you. I'm sorry you had to find out this way.
943 00:41:11 我腿都软了My legs just went numb.
944 00:41:13 我会没事的I'll be okay.
945 00:41:14 额 你还要上厕所吗？Uh' do you still need the bathroom?
946 00:41:16 我现在伤心得尿不出I think I'm too sad to go now.
947 00:41:17 好吧 没问题Yeah, of course.
948 00:41:19 好吧Okay.
949 00:41:20 嘿 这小家伙是谁？(SIGHS) Hey, who's this guy?
950 00:41:22 他叫”土豆泥”Oh, that's Mashed Potatoes.
951 00:41:24 我现在很生他的气I'm pretty mad at him right now.
952 00:41:26 嘿！Hey!
953 00:41:30 你愿意今晚去我家Would you like to flank me at a party
954 00:41:33 参加我举办的派对吗？that I'm attending at my own house tonight?
955 00:41:35 指他还是指我?Him or me?
956 00:41:37 噢 你 嗯嗯Oh, you. Yeah, yeah.
957 00:41:39 啊 或许吧 多久？Ah, maybe. What time?
958 00:41:40 8点30 8点45 ?点8230. 8245. 9200.
959 00:41:43 都可以的 我佃要玩很久You know, it doesn't matter. I'm pretty laid back.
960 00:41:45 好吧 我去看下我的日程表Okay, okay. Let me just, uh, check my calendar real quick.
961 00:41:49 你真走运 我今晚没事You're lucky. I am free.
962 00:41:51 真是好消息！Well, that's a good news!
963 00:41:54 我并不是意大利人 我也不知道怎么犯傻了I'm not Italian. I don't know why I said it like that.
964 00:41:56 我喜欢意大利人No, I like Italians.
965 00:41:58 好的 我是半个意大利人Okay. I'm half-Italian.
966 00:41:59 其实不是我撒谎的No, I'm not. That was a lie.
967 00:42:01 那么....额嗯So, then I... There, yeah. Okay.
968 00:42:06 你今晚来参加派对You will come to the party
969 00:42:07 而我发疯停不下来and I cannot stop trailing off.
970 00:42:11 好的 我现在停下了All right. But I will now.
971 00:42:12 那我正常的跳着舞离开I'm just gonna casually George Jefferson my way out of here.
972 00:42:18 祝你安好To you.
973 00:42:19 然后发疯到路边 然后爬进车里And just gonna ease on down the road and re-run it to the car.
974 00:42:25 好了再见 噢！Okay, goodbye. JAMES: Oh!
975 00:42:33 拜！Bye!
976 00:42:35 凯特 让我进去Kate, let me in.
977 00:42:38 噢 你们好啊Oh, hello.
978 00:42:39 嗨 怎么又来了Hi. Why?
979 00:42:40 我们在量藤架的尺寸We were measuring for a pergola.
980 00:42:42 啥像那种波兰食物？抱歉你们这是要办派对吗？What, like Polish food? I'm sorry, are you having a party here?
981 00:42:46 并没有 并没有Nope. Nope.
982 00:42:47 真感觉像你们要办派对If really looks like you're having a party.
983 00:42:49 噢 我不想让你们觉得自己是个混球Oh, Gosh. I hate to make you feel like a dick,
984 00:42:52 但是这些是为葬礼准备的but this is actually for a wake.
985 00:42:54 真遗憾听到这种事I am very sorry to hear that.
986 00:42:57 嗯 我们总是叮嘱表弟”别去铁轨上玩”Yeah. We always told our cousin, "Don't play on the tracks."
987 00:43:00 老天啊Dear God.
988 00:43:02 请节哀顺变I'm so sorry for your loss.
989 00:43:03 很显然我们表弟是个蠢货Obviously, our cousin was a dumbass.
990 00:43:06 但我们会想念她的 是”他“But we will miss her. Him.
991 00:43:08 赫姆他叫赫姆Herm. His name was Herm.
992 00:43:09 他脑袋都滚出一英里元KATE: They found his head, like, a mile away.
993 00:43:11 估计他当了鬼都要在这房子里住一辈子了I think he's probably gonna haunt the house forever.
994 00:43:14 无头幽灵Headless and angry. Yeah.
995 00:43:16 我才不信他们那套鬼话I am not buying that bull waste.
996 00:43:18 你那皮带是女式的That's a girl's belt.
997 00:43:20 有钱人就是想搬哪就搬哪是吧Rich people can just decide to move somewhere.
998 00:43:23 怎么不被钱噎死啊Choke on a roll of cash.
999 00:43:25 我一直在想So I've been thinking.
1000 00:43:26 为啥？Why?
1001 00:43:27 你已经这么努力了 还找到了份工作You've asserted yourself, and you got a job,
1002 00:43:30 所以说我应该借你点钱so maybe I could give you a loan.
1003 00:43:33 去弄个新住处To get a new place.
1004 00:43:35 你说的”借钱”指的是那种需要还的When you say, "loan, “ do you mean the kind you pay back",
1005 00:43:37 还是那种姐妹债or, like, a "wink-wink" loan?
1006 00:43:39 任何”借钱”不是都要还么All loans are supposed to be paid back.
1007 00:43:41 并不是Not in my experience.
1008 00:43:42 但你能还得起吧 因为你找到工作了But you can do that now because you have a job.
1009 00:43:44 是的I do.
1010 00:43:46 这提议太棒了 可以！That is an awesome offer. All right!
1011 00:43:50 好的 等下Okay, wait.
1012 00:43:51 我得找你要点东西才能借钱给你I am going to ask you for something in return for the money,
1013 00:43:54 而你别认为and I don't want you to
1014 00:43:55 我要求的条件是必须的think that this loan is contingent on that,
1015 00:43:57 但是如果你不答应我but I will say that if you don't do it,
1016 00:43:59 我可能就不会借钱给你了I feel like I might not give you the money.
1017 00:44:01 好 什么条件？Okay. Great. What?
1018 00:44:05 要说出口有点困难 让我酝酿下It's a lot harder than I thought. Just give me a minute.
1019 00:44:10 今晚你能当”派对家长”么？Will you be the party mom tonight?
1020 00:44:12 我好尽情疯一次So I can let my freak flag fly?
1021 00:44:16 我很愿意I would love to.
1022 00:44:17 是吗？Yeah?
1023 00:44:19 可你的表情可不是这么说的Because your face is telling me something else.
1024 00:44:23 我很乐意That would bring me joy.
1025 00:44:25 算了 反正你也做不好还是我来吧You know what? Forget it. It'll just get screwed up. I'll do it.
1026 00:44:27 你认为我照顾不了人？You don't think I can take care of people?
1027 00:44:29 我可是当妈的！交给我吧！I am an actual mom! I got this!
1028 00:44:32 好吧可”派对家长”不能喝酒Okay, but the party mom can't drink.
1029 00:44:34 这是什么破规定？What fresh fuckery is that?
1030 00:44:36 当妈的会在自己孩子的生日派对上喝酒吗？Does a mother drink at her kid's birthday party?
1031 00:44:39 当然 如果有救生员的话Yeah, if there's a lifeguard.
1032 00:44:40 不对No.
1033 00:44:42 没关系 我来吧It's okay. I don't mind.
1034 00:44:43 我来做 没事的Forget it. I'll be fine. It's okay.
1035 00:44:54 好我今晚不喝酒而你得好好玩Okay. I won't drink tonight. You groin it up.
1036 00:44:57 我当你你当我I'll be you. You be me.
1037 00:44:58 老天啊 我可以好好疯了就这么定了！Oh, my God. So many red flags! Okay. Let's do this!
1038 00:45:02 你和帅哥调情的时候 别暴露自己是离了婚的When you're flirting with Mr. Man, don't weave your divorce tale.
1039 00:45:07 烂醉如泥的人会发疯 赶紧让他们清醒Drunk people like to show off with fi re. Shut it down.
1040 00:45:10 说话嘴部动作丰富点Over-pronounce things,
1041 00:45:12 因为他注意力会集中到你的嘴唇上去because he is gonna be watching your mouth.
1042 00:45:15 记住别把那些喝吐的人丢在那不管Remember, don't leave someone when they're throwing up.
1043 00:45:18 睡在呕吐物上是致死的Sleep-barfing kills.
1044 00:45:20 当你们进到卧室里之后Once you're in the bedroom,
1045 00:45:22 记得把门锁好我才不能lock the door so I can't burst in
1046 00:45:24 冲进来拍纪念照片and take a commemorative picture.
1047 00:45:28 凯特你能来清理下这摊粘液吗Kate, can you clean up this gel' please?
1048 00:45:31 来了 别追了Yes! Stop asking me about it.
1049 00:45:48 又到了担心没有入会来的可怕时刻It's that scary time when you're afraid that no one will show up.
1050 00:45:52 才8点32 大家才不会…It's 8:32. People aren't gonna...
1051 00:45:57 去吧 妹子 你是主角Take it, girl. This is your show.
1052 00:46:03 嗨Hey.
1053 00:46:04 嗨 嗨！Hey! Hi! Hey!
1054 00:46:07 是罗伯和丽兹 还有他们儿子It's Rob and Liz. And their son.
1055 00:46:09 不行Nope.
1056 00:46:10 绝对不行 儿童不允许入内Not happening. No kids.
1057 00:46:11 把他丢在楼下看电视就行Yeah, he can just watch TV downstairs.
1058 00:46:13 不行他得回家No. Him got to go.
1059 00:46:15 抱歉 今晚的主题少儿不宜Yeah. Sorry, there's just too many things he could ingest.
1060 00:46:18 额.......Um...
1061 00:46:20 我们马上回来We'll be back.
1062 00:46:21 儿子 我们带你去找外婆Chase, we are gonna go see Nana.
1063 00:46:24 对 耶！Yeah. Yeah. Yay!
1064 00:46:25 你记得她的对吧？ROB: You remember her, right?
1065 00:46:27 成年人真有时间观念啊 对吧?Damn. Adults are on time, huh?
1066 00:46:29 对Yeah.
1067 00:46:30 为什么艾利克斯在我们车道上?Why is Alex walking up our driveway?
1068 00:46:32 对不起是我邀请的I'm so sorry. I invited him,
1069 00:46:34 我内疚得不行他很孤独的because I feel bad for him. He's very lonely.
1070 00:46:36 敲 敲 谁在那?Knock, knock. Who's there?
1071 00:46:38 杜安 哪个杜安？Duane! Duane who?
1072 00:46:41 浴缸杜安Duane the bathtub.
1073 00:46:42 我溺水了！I'm dwowning!
1074 00:46:47 你还是这么幽默You still got it!
1075 00:46:49 能给我杯饮料么！May I please have a beverage?
1076 00:46:52 简直是天堂Sanctuary! Mmm.
1077 00:46:56 哇！Wow!
1078 00:46:57 欢迎来到侏罗纪公园！Welcome to Jurassic Park!
1079 00:47:02 我去 我已经开始受不了了Christ, he is immediately exhausting.
1080 00:47:05 你们好啊DAVE: Hello there.
1081 00:47:06 乐趣列车到站了！Fun train pulling in!
1082 00:47:07 Booze, booze! Whoo-hoo!Booze, booze! Whoo-hoo!
1083 00:47:16 而当我爸死的时候 他居然浑身发光And when my dad finally died, he actually glowed.
1084 00:47:22 凯莉 啊Kelly! Ugh!
1085 00:47:24 我们什么时候变这么老的？When did we all get so old?
1086 00:47:26 女生们都还尽量打扮得年轻I mean, at least the women are making an effort,
1087 00:47:28 但是这里的男人们but the men here?
1088 00:47:29 感觉像是被下衰老药了一样Look like they're being slowly poisoned.
1089 00:47:32 最重要的是你自己的想法 对吧？I think it's about how you feel, right?
1090 00:47:36 都没了 懂吗？Done. You know?
1091 00:47:39 好日子一去不复返了 对吧？Best days behind us. Right, guys'?
1092 00:47:41 不好说I don't know.
1093 00:47:42 你可能还能活个8年10年的 凯莉You might live like another eight or 10 years, Kelly.
1094 00:47:45 别这么悲观You don't wanna be looking at it like that.
1095 00:47:47 生切斯的时候他有九斤多Chase was like a 10-pound baby.
1096 00:47:48 当他终于生出来的时候So when he came out of there,
1097 00:47:50 简直疼死老娘了 太可怕了I mean' it was decimated. That's horrible. Ugh.
1098 00:47:53 结果后来我下面恢复好了之后So I ended up having a vaginal rejuvenation.
1099 00:47:55 变得和钥匙孔一样紧It's as tight as a keyhole down there.
1100 00:47:58 我想的话 连硬币都能夹起来I could pick up quarters with it, if I wanted to.
1101 00:48:01 当然我还没这么做过I haven't wanted to yet.
1102 00:48:03 我不该给你们说这些的I shouldn't be telling you this,
1103 00:48:04 但是罗伯的丁丁上有个结but Rob's penis has a kink in it.
1104 00:48:06 想不起该怎么称呼了I can't think of what it's called.
1105 00:48:08 感觉应该是褶皱?It's kind of, like, crimped?
1106 00:48:10 不知道 说不清…I don't know. I can't even...
1107 00:48:12 膘来在这啊 嗯ROB: There they are. Yeah.
1108 00:48:14 嗨Hey.
1109 00:48:15 她又在炫耀我了？She bragging about me?
1110 00:48:19 昨天在Youtube上传了很多视频Put a bunch of videos on YouTube yesterday.
1111 00:48:21 我在朝着100点击量努力 就如俗话说”一飞冲天”I'm up to a hundred hits, so, sensacien, as they say.
1112 00:48:26 是空的It's empty-
1113 00:48:28 啪！Boink!
1114 00:48:31 他爪子那被感染了 就是爪掌那He has a yeast infection in his paws, between his paw pads,
1115 00:48:35 我得给他清理and I have to get a wipe,
1116 00:48:36 每晚都得给他清理爪子and I have to wipe out his paws every night.
1117 00:48:39 你们能给我杯饮料么？Are you gonna get me a drink?
1118 00:48:40 你就不能给我个机会么？Can you give me a chance to offer?
1119 00:48:43 就这个县每年都有1000宗安乐死案子One thousand euthanized a year just in this county.
1120 00:48:46 某天早上醒月经没了I woke up one day, and boom. No more periods.
1121 00:48:51 这什么鬼啊？成年人派对太无聊了What the fuckenheimer? Grown-up parties suck.
1122 00:48:54 一个人怎么可以去做2次肠镜啊How can one person have two colonoscopy stories?
1123 00:48:57 我去准备跳舞了I'm gonna get the dancing started.
1124 00:49:00 上吧 妹子Get in there, kid.
1125 00:49:01 嘿嘿嘿 嗨Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hi.
1126 00:49:03 噢 手感真和你这年龄不符Sure don't feel like your age. Oh.
1127 00:49:06 我希望你裤袋里的玩意是手机I hope that you have got your phone in your front pocket.
1128 00:49:13 噢No.
1129 00:49:15 呼Whoo!
1130 00:49:16 来吧 大家 一起来！Come on. Here we go. Here we go!
1131 00:49:19 嘿不能从莫尼·莫尼开始Hey, you can't start with Mony Mony!
1132 00:49:21 这就像嘿咻从菊花开始一样 噢That's like starting with anal. Oh.
1133 00:49:22 好的All right.
1134 00:49:25 基尔Geernt!
1135 00:49:29 你们好啊 我拿油漆过来了Hi, there. Dropping off paint.
1136 00:49:32 我放泳池那边吧I'll put it by the pool.
1137 00:49:33 所以呢？好的So? Okay.
1138 00:49:36 抱歉 我之前还担心MR. GEERNT: My apologies. I was worried
1139 00:49:38 你们是开派对 但是现在看出来了you were having a party, but I see now,
1140 00:49:40 你们确实在办葬礼you really are having a wake.
1141 00:49:48 嘿Hey.
1142 00:49:51 这派对无聊透了 你有…This party is fucking lame. Do you...
1143 00:49:53 毒品?我认识个人Drugs? I know a guy.
1144 00:49:54 打给他Call him.
1145 00:49:56 你好啊...嗨Hello! Hi!
1146 00:49:58 Hae-Won!Hae-Won!
1147 00:50:00 是Hae-Won才对No, Hae-Won.
1148 00:50:01 好吧 抱歉 你来了 简直不敢相信 快看！Right, sorry. You made it. I can't believe it. Look!
1149 00:50:03 啥？看看这群辣妹What? Look at this flock of hotties.
1150 00:50:06 哇 你看上去真开心Wow. You look so happy.
1151 00:50:07 感觉特别自由 一点都不抑郁You look so free and not oppressed at all.
1152 00:50:09 我们当时还很担心你呢We were worried about you.
1153 00:50:11 真的？我们还担心你们呢Really? We were worried about you.
1154 00:50:13 你俩的脚老得像牛肉干一样Both your feet looked like dried beef.
1155 00:50:16 啊 我就知道你当时在说我们的坏话Ah, I knew you were talking shit about us.
1156 00:50:19 谁要喝酒？来吧Who wants a drink? Come on.
1157 00:50:20 一我们喝酒去！一狂欢！Let's go get drink! Let's party!
1158 00:50:21 很感谢你能邀请我们Thank you so much for having us.
1159 00:50:23 你们要走了？派对很棒What? You're leaving? ROB: Great party.
1160 00:50:25 凯特他们要跑了 嘿！Kate, they're leaving. Hey!
1161 00:50:26 切斯睡觉要做恶梦Chase has night terrors.
1162 00:50:28 绐对不行Absolutely not.
1163 00:50:29 各位请过来一下Everybody, huddle up for a second.
1164 00:50:31 任何想着要闪人的人To anyone who's even thinking about leaving,
1165 00:50:34 赶紧打消念头吧you can forget it.
1166 00:50:36 你们和我们一样需要放松一下You need this as much as we do.
1167 00:50:38 和我们一样Just as much as we do.
1168 00:50:39 如果你们觉得我今晚穿成这样If you think I strapped all this shit on tonight
1169 00:50:41 就为了看着你们跑回家看电视剧so you could be home to watch Flip or Flop,
1170 00:50:44 你们简直是大错特错you are fucking dreaming.
1171 00:50:45 大错特错You're dreaming.
1172 00:50:47 丹 金 你俩有4个孩子Dan and Kim. You got four kids,
1173 00:50:49 就我从你们的圣诞祝福卡上and from what I can thin slice from
1174 00:50:51 看到的来说他们就是熊孩子your Christmas letters, they're wangs.
1175 00:50:52 谢谢 等等 啥？Thank you. Wait, what?
1176 00:50:55 凯莉 你的头像是一份低脂墨西哥砂锅菜Kelly! Your profile pic is a low-fat Mexican casserole.
1177 00:50:59 嗯 是啊Yeah, it is.
1178 00:51:02 罗伯 你上次在聚会上Rob' when was the last time you danced
1179 00:51:04 忘情热舞到深夜是多久以前了?with the night air hitting your nips?
1180 00:51:06 ”枪与玫瑰”演唱会1??1年Guns N' Roses. Citrus Bowl, 1991.
1181 00:51:10 你们难道不想再体验一下那种无忧无虑的感觉吗？Don't you wanna feel that carefree again?
1182 00:51:13 就像 狂欢尽兴那种感觉?Just, like, balls deep in joy?
1183 00:51:16 是的 狂欢到天明Yes! Yeah. Where'd them balls go?
1184 00:51:19 你干嘛呢？我在配合你演讲What are you doing? I'm being your hype man.
1185 00:51:21 很好 现在还不迟Great. It's not too late.
1186 00:51:23 你们体内一直都有颗年轻的心The young you still lives inside you.
1187 00:51:26 就像带状疱疹一样Just like shingles, y'all.
1188 00:51:27 我们以前经常在这房子里尽情狂欢KATE: We used to party in this house like animals
1189 00:51:29 因为我们知道我们一辈子还很长because we thought we would never die.
1190 00:51:31 要我说 今晚我们像维京人一样疯玩I say, tonight, we party like Vikings
1191 00:51:34 心里想着明天就会死！because we know we could die tomorrow!
1192 00:51:36 我们烧艘船吧！Let's light a boat on fire!
1193 00:51:39 今夜就是我送给你们的礼物！Tonight is my gift to you!
1194 00:51:41 干杯吧 想怎么玩就怎么玩妈妈就在这照顾你们Drink up and run with scissors tonight, because Mama got you.
1195 00:51:45 说得好！Aw, Shit!
1196 00:51:47 耶 老妈！Yeah, Mama!
1197 00:51:48 去打电话给你们的保姆吧Now, go call your sitters!
1198 00:51:50 打电话给他们干嘛？But what should we call them?
1199 00:51:53 艾利克斯还是这么幽默大伙Alex is still funny, guys.
1200 00:51:57 谢谢 我去倒酒Thanks. I'm pouring shots.
1201 00:51:59 让我看看你们还知道该怎么喝 呼！Now remind me that you know how to do this. Whoo!
1202 00:52:01 我记得怎么喝！JERRY: I remember how to do it!
1203 00:52:03 我们跳到胸都甩脱了吧！And let's dance our titties off!
1204 00:52:06 喝 喝 喝！Shot, shot, shot!
1205 00:52:12 下一轮 伏特加！Next round, vodka!
1206 00:52:14 喝光了吗？Have you done it?
1207 00:52:20 有小孩的才能喝Only people with children.
1208 00:52:21 有小孩的才能和 有小孩的才能喝People with kids. People with kids.
1209 00:52:53 嗨Hey!
1210 00:52:54 这兰花真漂亮是送我的吗？That's a really beautiful orchid. Is that for me?
1211 00:52:56 不是这是我的No, this is mine.
1212 00:52:59 莫拉快邀请人家进来Maura. Invite Doctor Bushwhack in.
1213 00:53:01 告诉他该放哪就好 好Show him where to put his things. I'll greet.
1214 00:53:03 额 快请进吧 然后把外套…Uh, please come in, and take off your...
1215 00:53:06 进来就是Just come in.
1216 00:53:07 给你There you go.
1217 00:53:08 谢谢 不客气Oh, thank you. No problem.
1218 00:53:09 真漂亮 谢谢It's beautiful. Thank you.
1219 00:53:11 哇 真好闻Wow. It smells amazing.
1220 00:53:14 兰花有味道吗？Do orchids smell?
1221 00:53:16 有味道 如果你养点蕈蚊They can, if you get fungus gnats.
1222 00:53:18 而且杀都杀不完 整个房间都有臭味And those are hard to get rid of. It stinks up your whole house.
1223 00:53:21 但这盆没问题But this one looks good.
1224 00:53:23 嗯 这盆很健康的Yeah, this is pretty healthy.
1225 00:53:24 你去接客人吧Why don't you greet your guests?
1226 00:53:26 我自己去倒杯酒 然后面壁等你I'm gonna make myself a drink, and face the wall.
1227 00:53:33 该分担了 20块钱的酒和食物Cover time. Twenty bucks for the booze and food, please.
1228 00:53:36 凯特 女同们来了Kate. The lesbians are here.
1229 00:53:38 太好了Excellent.
1230 00:53:39 嘿 介意我当DJ吗？Hey. Cool if I spin some tunes?
1231 00:53:42 我可不敢阻止你I'm afraid to tell you no.
1232 00:53:44 很好 很好Great. Great.
1233 00:53:45 让让他们大伙！KATE: Let them through, everybody!
1234 00:53:53 准备听月亮之上吧Get ready for a Sarah McLachlan/Tracy Chapman mash-up.
1235 00:53:59 噢 耶！Oh, yeah!
1236 00:54:00 我去Oh, shit.
1237 00:54:16 能和你说几句吗? 好KATE: Can I talk to you for a second? Yeah.
1238 00:54:18 你俩怎么样了？How's it going in there?
1239 00:54:19 我给他说了蕈蚊的事Well, I told him about my fungus gnats.
1240 00:54:22 谈话里让他说大部分Let him do the bulk of the talking.
1241 00:54:24 可我害怕冷场Yeah, I'm just afraid when it gets quiet.
1242 00:54:26 冷场里有好东西藏着Good things are hidden in the quiet.
1243 00:54:29 谁说的Who said that?
1244 00:54:31 我说的 我很聪明的I did. I'm smart.
1245 00:54:32 好吧Okay.
1246 00:54:33 你该把这句话印到你那鸡汤卡片上去You should put that on one of your cards.
1247 00:54:43 但这是你的职责 大家都注意到了你没到场But it is expected of you. Your absence has already been noted.
1248 00:54:47 那小孩对我来说什么也不算JOFFREY ON TV: The boy means nothing to me.
1249 00:54:48 我最受不了女人哭哭啼啼的了I can't stand the wailing of women.
1250 00:54:52 老天提利昂扇那熊孩子的画面God, I could watch Tyrion slap the smug
1251 00:54:54 我连着看100遍off that little fucker's face a hundred times
1252 00:54:56 都不会觉得腻and never get sick of it.
1253 00:54:58 你知道杰克·格利森Did you know that Jack Gleeson
1254 00:54:59 是在里的那个小孩么？
1255 00:55:01 珍 当你用演员的真名的话Jean, when you use the actors' real names,
1256 00:55:04 你兢不能在活在幻想世界里了you're not allowing yourself to live inside the fantasy world
1257 00:55:07 制片方花了这么多心血为我们创造的that they've so lovingly crafted for us.
1258 00:55:09 噢还有记住Oh, and just a reminder
1259 00:55:10 之夜不能玩手机there's a no phone policy on our G. O. T. Nights.
1260 00:55:13 抱歉I'm sorry.
1261 00:55:14 依安·米切尔一直在给我发埃利斯姐妹派对的照片Ian Mitchell keeps posting photos of the Ellis Island party,
1262 00:55:18 看上去挺好玩的and it looks like kinda damn fun.
1263 00:55:20 我挺想去的I kinda wanna drop by.
1264 00:55:23 他们那有奶酪They have cheese.
1265 00:55:25 奶酪Cheese.
1266 00:55:27 我们只有红酒All we have is wine.
1267 00:55:29 而且还是不含酒精的And it's non-alcoholic.
1268 00:55:31 在那还不用脱鞋We don't have to take off our shoes there.
1269 00:55:33 那里还没这么多规矩And there aren't so many rules.
1270 00:55:39 再来一杯I'll take another one...
1271 00:55:40 嘿 嘿Hey. MAURA: Hey.
1272 00:55:43 我好久没参加过派对了Man, I haven't been to a party in a while.
1273 00:55:47 我懂 我上一次参加派对I know. The last party
1274 00:55:48 估计只能追溯到我的婚宴上了I went to was probably my wedding reception.
1275 00:55:55 这酒… 你亲眼目睹了你父母的死亡吗？This wine... So did you see your parents die?
1276 00:55:58 没没亲眼No, I didn't,
1277 00:56:02 别人告诉我的but I know they did.
1278 00:56:04 这可真好Well, that's good to know.
1279 00:56:06 一点都不好It's not good to know.
1280 00:56:08 嘿没事的Hey, it's okay.
1281 00:56:10 你问我什么都行I mean, you can ask me anything.
1282 00:56:12 你想知道什么？What do you want to know about me?
1283 00:56:16 我在烤架上烤着玉米片I have nachos that are in the broiler.
1284 00:56:19 我得去弄下了I have to go get them.
1285 00:56:20 嗯 去吧 我在这等你Yeah, go. Do your thing. I'll be here.
1286 00:56:22 好的 好的All right. All right.
1287 00:56:26 你一个人在这干嘛？你男票呢？What are you doing out here by yourself? Where's your boyfriend'?
1288 00:56:29 我觉得和他不合适我还是跳过吧No, I don't think he's right for me. It's a pass.
1289 00:56:31 他说话太直了 根本没惊喜可言He's so direct' you know. There's no surprises there.
1290 00:56:34 没什么可以挖掘的There's not a lot to discover.
1291 00:56:35 我喜欢神秘系的 而且I mean, I like mystery.
1292 00:56:36 嘿咻太爽了容易分心 就好像...And, you know, great sex is so distracting. I mean, it's...
1293 00:56:39 虽然.......嗯哼....It's nice to be... Mmm-hmm...
1294 00:56:42 在身体上和精神上都喜欢着一个人是好事so physically, emotionally attracted to someone.
1295 00:56:45 啊哈 然后呢Uh-huh. Yeah.
1296 00:56:47 但是这并不是人生But that's not what life is.
1297 00:56:48 人生的重点是挑战Life is about challenges
1298 00:56:50 阴影 困难 以及感觉不自在and shadows and corners and feeling weird.
1299 00:56:54 你简直满嘴蠢话 我去给你买杯漱口水吧You are so full of shit, that I'm gonna buy you Pull-Ups.
1300 00:56:56 我觉得我和他只能是好朋友I just think we're gonna be very good friends.
1301 00:56:57 你想多了 并没有I think you're being a little dramatic. I'm not.
1302 00:57:00 我问了他 他有没有亲眼目睹双亲的死亡I asked him if he saw his parents die.
1303 00:57:02 老天啊Oh, Jesus.
1304 00:57:04 我不喜欢这种感觉 什么感觉Yeah. I don't like this feeling. What feeling?
1305 00:57:06 就是在高中的时候 你喜欢上了一个人This high school feeling when you're crushing on someone
1306 00:57:09 而又害怕那个人不会喜欢你and you're afraid that they're not gonna like you back,
1307 00:57:11 然后你就心碎了and then you're gonna get heart cramps.
1308 00:57:13 嘿 我觉得你真是想多了Hey, I think you're getting ahead of yourself.
1309 00:57:16 反正也育人在和他说话了Someone else is talking to him anyway.
1310 00:57:19 布林达？Brinda?
1311 00:57:21 绝对不行！Oh, hail naw!
1312 00:57:24 你是认真的？我真不懂你了Are you serious? Because I am straight-up baffled.
1313 00:57:27 什么？I'm sorry?
1314 00:57:28 我记得你不是说这场派对是”穷途末路”了么？I believe you called this party a "sad and desperate event"?
1315 00:57:32 我只是想着我应该过来和大家打个招呼Well, I just figured I'd pop in and say hello to everyone.
1316 00:57:35 我们都是成年人了 对吧？I mean, we're all adults now, right?
1317 00:57:37 想得美 骑你的自行车回家吧婊予Nice try. On your bike, bitch.
1318 00:57:39 别拿你那脏手碰我妹的帅哥Get your peanut butter oui of my sister's chocolate.
1319 00:57:41 哇Wow.
1320 00:57:42 我喜欢你的衣服 但是不喜欢穿衣服的人 滚蛋吧I respect your jumpsuit, but not its contents. Hit it.
1321 00:57:46 你简直太逗了Well, this is ludicrous.
1322 00:57:48 滚蛋吧Get out.
1323 00:57:51 行吧 反正我还有其他活动Fine. I have another function to attend anyway.
1324 00:57:55 而且 我把一根卫生棉条冲进你家的厕所了Besides, I flushed a tampon down your toilet.
1325 00:57:57 你的卫生巾都是走一路丢一路大家都知道You're pads all the way and everyone knows it.
1326 00:57:59 才不是Nuh-uh.
1327 00:58:01 我们走 别在这化粪池玩了Let's go. Let's get out of this septic tank.
1328 00:58:03 我还想多玩会I kind of want to stay a little.
1329 00:58:04 我也是Yeah, me too.
1330 00:58:06 认真的？For serious?
1331 00:58:07 我们从没来这玩过就因为凯特恨你We never got to go before because Kate hated you.
1332 00:58:10 我们这是被殃及无辜了We suffered from secondhand hate.
1333 00:58:16 哇Wow.
1334 00:58:22 嗨 很欢迎你俩你们知道的对吧?Hi. You guys are welcome here. You know that, right?
1335 00:58:24 要去喝点酒吗？好Do you wanna do some shots? Yeah.
1336 00:58:26 嗨 我要进行噪音投诉Hi, I'd like to make a noise complaint.
1337 00:58:30 凛冬将至婊子们Winter is coming, bitches.
1338 00:58:33 是什么顺序来着？看好So, what's this order again? JAMES: All right.
1339 00:58:35 先吃盐It goes salt.
1340 00:58:36 喝酒Shot.
1341 00:58:38 然后吸柠檬?And then we suck on these?
1342 00:58:40 不是 这玩意是拿来砸对方的No, you throw them at each other
1343 00:58:41 就该这么喝That's the way you're supposed to.
1344 00:58:43 莫拉？就是这…Maura? That's what...
1345 00:58:44 有男的找你Some guy here to see you?
1346 00:58:46 失陪下Excuse me.
1347 00:58:47 没事 去吧All right. Go do it.
1348 00:58:48 我的人在卧室里 你啥人?My dude's in the bedroom. What dude?
1349 00:58:50 卖大麻的熊孩子Some kid we're buying weed from.
1350 00:58:51 噢 好Ooh, okay.
1351 00:58:54 你好啊Hi, there.
1352 00:58:59 我的天Holy mother.
1353 00:59:00 没错 这是我的好朋友 我兄弟 对吧That's right. This is my best friend, my brah, right?
1354 00:59:03 他叫帕祖祖This is Pazuzu.
1355 00:59:05 确实是It sure is.
1356 00:59:06 帕祖祖很感谢你把手臂带来了Pazuzu. Thank you so much for bringing your arms here.
1357 00:59:09 毒品带来了Your drugs here.
1358 00:59:11 你的纹身是萨摩亚人么？我看过一个纪录片Uh, is your ink Samoan'? I saw a documentary once...
1359 00:59:14 我来吧I will handle this.
1360 00:59:16 我们想...买毒品We are looking for... To buy drugs.
1361 00:59:21 想要哪种？What'chu want?
1362 00:59:23 我这有克他命 冰毒 摇头丸 安得拉I got ketamine, meth, MDMA, Adderall,
1363 00:59:26 脑残金 海洛因 可卡因 霹雳摇头丸 可待因 去污粉Bromo-Dragonfly, heroin, coke, crack, codeine, oxys,
1364 00:59:31 四氯乙烯 脑白金(EXCLAIMS) percs, vikes,
1365 00:59:32 五氯苯酚 麦角酸二乙基酰胺 墨斯卡灵PCP, LSD, Dilaudid, mescaline,
1366 00:59:35 迷幻菇洛用盐可的松酮咯酸mushrooms, bath salts, cortisone, Toradol.
1367 00:59:38 还有莫莉摇头丸 还有她姐姐桑德拉 还有大弗兰克I got molly. I got her sister Sandra. I got big Frank.
1368 00:59:41 我有避孕药 还有B计划I got birth control. I got Plan B.
1369 00:59:43 还有中国市场禁售的那种吗啡I got that morphine from China they took off the market.
1370 00:59:45 壮阳药Shit to make your click hard.
1371 00:59:47 萎阳药 还有能长出丁丁的药Shit to make your dick soft. Shit'll find your dick.
1372 00:59:49 还有从肯尼亚运来的That shit there's from Kenya.
1373 00:59:50 用在银背大猩猩身上的治坏血病的药Supposed to be a scurvy cure for silverback gorillas,
1374 00:59:53 用在人身上的话 只会让人开狂暴模式自慰but for humans, it just makes them violently masturbate.
1375 00:59:55 我刚说霹雳可卡因了吗？我这可多了Did I say crack? Because I got more of that, too.
1376 00:59:56 嗯 你刚介绍过霹雳可卡因了Mmm-hmm. You said crack already.
1377 00:59:57 我还有布洛芬 阿司匹林I got some Ibuprofen, aspirin.
1378 00:59:59 你要的话还有粘性打火石I got Flintstone Gummies if you want.
1379 01:00:00 你对这工作挺在行的You seem good at your job.
1380 01:00:02 我们不买这些 不买We don't need any of that. No. No.
1381 01:00:03 我们只是想买那种80年代的低级烟斗We're just gonna take some low-level, late '80s dirt pot.
1382 01:00:09 懂吧 就是那种You know, the kind with seeds
1383 01:00:09 把草切好了 然后放进烟斗里吸的那种in it that you separate on a Frisbee.
1384 01:00:11 就是那种去音乐会也能吸不违法的Something you smoke at a Bangles concert.
1385 01:00:13 我开车横跨整个市I didn't drive my ass across
1386 01:00:14 不是为了来卖几个破烟斗给几个老妈子的town to sell some moms some fucking dirt pot.
1387 01:00:17 你们必须买点10号风云Y'all gonna buy some Cloud 10.
1388 01:00:19 抱歉 老兄 她们是新手AVE: I'm sorry, man. They're just new to the game.
1389 01:00:20 女士们 拜托 这可是10号风云Ladies, come on. This is Cloud 10.
1390 01:00:22 这绝对爽歪歪This is the shiz, a'ight?
1391 01:00:23 里面是70%摇头丸20%阿得拉 10%乐趣This is, like, 70% molly, 20% Adderall, and it's 10% fun!
1392 01:00:28 最后10%是啥来着What's that last 10%?
1393 01:00:32 雪豹 乐趣Snow leopard. Fun.
1394 01:00:33 不说真的我是当护士的 直接告诉我名字No, seriously. I'm a nurse. So, just give me a name.
1395 01:00:36 神秘物质 我其实不知道Mystic. I actually don't know.
1396 01:00:37 这样吧 你感觉挺专业的You know what? You seem like a pro,
1397 01:00:39 我们就买些大麻so we'll just take a little ohwheed
1398 01:00:41 然后再来一丁点10号风云and just a skosh of Cloud 10.
1399 01:00:44 那里面有榛子粉吗？MAURA: Are there hazelnuts in that?
1400 01:00:46 我要拿上这包壮阳 没问题I'll take the stuff for the dick. I got you.
1401 01:00:47 我拿这包 你们介意我在这玩会吗？KATE: I'll take this. PAZUZU: Y'all mind if I hang out a bit?
1402 01:00:50 额 不介意 不介意Uh... Nah. Nah.
1403 01:00:52 请 请别留下 不Please, please, please don't. Nuh-uh.
1404 01:00:54 别留下 留下玩吧 嗯Don't stay... Stay-Yep. Thanks.
1405 01:01:02 嘿 你柜子里藏了金鱼粉吗？Hey, you don't have any Goldfish crackers up there?
1406 01:01:05 不是想八卦的Don't mean to be coy.
1407 01:01:07 噢 嗨 阿历克斯MAURA: Oh, hi, Alex.
1408 01:01:08 我只是把甜叶菊藏好 那玩意挺贵的I'm just hiding this stevia. That shit's expensive.
1409 01:01:10 锦鲤 金鱼Koi, goldfish.
1410 01:01:12 真好笑You.
1411 01:01:23 知道吗 你属于那种You know, you're the
1412 01:01:25 我年轻时候特别喜欢的硬汉type of badass that I was susceptible to in my youth.
1413 01:01:35 我以前经常和”阿姆斯特朗肌肉娃娃”亲热I used to make out with my Stretch Armstrong doll,
1414 01:01:37 所以现在对我来说 真是梦想成真了so this is, like, a full circle moment for me.
1415 01:01:41 不错 我发明了手电筒It's cool. I invented the Fleshlight.
1416 01:01:43 所以我只在阴影里亲热I just do this shit on the side.
1417 01:01:46 好吧Right on.
1418 01:01:50 失陪下Excuse me.
1419 01:01:58 嘿把音乐关掉！Hey. Turn the music off!
1420 01:02:01 大家都蹲下！Everybody duck!
1421 01:02:04 借过借过Quack, quack.
1422 01:02:11 嗨 我们已经捐过款了Hi. We donated already.
1423 01:02:13 嗨 我们收到了一起噪音投诉Hey. We received a noise complaint?
1424 01:02:15 警官 真是抱歉我们马上就散场Oh, Officer, we are so sorry. We'll shut everything clown.
1425 01:02:18 不...No, it's...
1426 01:02:19 等下 你眼睛真是漂亮Wait a minute. Your eyes are gorgeous.
1427 01:02:23 你看起来真像阿弗莱克兄弟You know you look exactly like an Affleck brother, right?
1428 01:02:27 简直是神似I mean, it is like, dead ringer times.
1429 01:02:30 这里有未成年人喝酒么？Any underage drinking going on?
1430 01:02:32 没 没Oh, no. No. No.
1431 01:02:34 里面的人年龄都是21乘2了Everybody's double 21 in there.
1432 01:02:35 早就成年了Way over age.
1433 01:02:36 里面还有个60岁的We had a 60-year-old buy our beer.
1434 01:02:38 你看上去可不像超过25岁的Well, you don't look a day over 25.
1435 01:02:39 谢谢Thank you.
1436 01:02:42 35岁Thirty-five.
1437 01:02:43 噢！Oh!
1438 01:02:44 让我省点心好吗表现得成熟点声音小一点Just do me a favor and act your ages and keep it down?
1439 01:02:47 我们会小声点的We will keep it down.
1440 01:02:49 各种小声 小得听不到We will keep it so down, like, below sea level.
1441 01:02:52 配合不错 嗯Nice teamwork. Yeah.
1442 01:02:53 我真想念和警察调情I miss flirting with cops.
1443 01:02:55 他刚才怕死我们了He was so afraid of us.
1444 01:02:57 你个混蛋贱人婊子Motherfucker, titty-sucker, two-bailed bitch.
1445 01:03:00 今夜的第一个警察被我们迷走了First PoPo of the night thwarted by charm.
1446 01:03:03 埃利斯派对继续！Ellis Island, proceed, y'all!
1447 01:03:12 嘿 我刚才让DJ加了首特别的曲子Hey. I put in a request for our special song
1448 01:03:14 我们可以一起跳我们的主题曲了so we can do the Applebutt Jam.
1449 01:03:16 今晚还是别跳那个了吧 那舞不怎么酷I don't think we should do that tonight. That's not that cool.
1450 01:03:19 别 今夜我是主角 我说酷就酷No! Tonight is my night, and it is cool,
1451 01:03:22 因为我们一起跳 而且我们根酷because we're doing it, and we're cool.
1452 01:04:10 跳得真好 对吧？It's good, right?
1453 01:04:31 呼！Whoo!
1454 01:04:37 来我这 小可爱KATE: Come here, peanut.
1455 01:04:39 给妈妈说说你这次又被什么吓到了Tell Mama what's freaking you the fuck out about time.
1456 01:04:42 不知道 只是I don't know. It's just like...
1457 01:04:44 有一天 我看到一个老婆婆The other day, I saw this old lady
1458 01:04:47 在大街上隔着窗子看着我looking at me through a window on the street,
1459 01:04:49 我为她感到很遗憾懂吗?and I felt bad for her, you know?
1460 01:04:52 我向她招手 她也向我招手I waved at her, and she waved back at me,
1461 01:04:55 然后我突然间意识到我是在朝镜子挥手and then I realized that was just my reflection.
1462 01:05:01 镜子里就是我这张老年It was just me and my old beef jerky face.
1463 01:05:08 为什么时间会让脸老成这样？Why does time do that to faces?
1464 01:05:11 为什么？Why?
1465 01:05:15 别这样Don't do that.
1466 01:05:18 当时机成熟时 和你男票抽这个When the time is right, smoke this with your gentleman friend.
1467 01:05:21 我要去给大伙I'm gonna make space cakes
1468 01:05:22 来一份大麻蛋糕for the rest of the gang like a goddamn June Cleaver
1469 01:05:25 因为我是能当好妈妈的 嗯嗯because I have a domestic side. Mmm-hmm.
1470 01:05:48 看看我乳沟里有啥Look what fell into my cleavage.
1471 01:05:49 太棒了 我们走Plinko! Jackpot! Let's go.
1472 01:05:55 噢…Ooh...
1473 01:05:59 你玩运动吗？Do You play any sports?
1474 01:06:02 玩了一段时间网球Tennis, for a little while.
1475 01:06:04 我想也是That's what I was gonna guess.
1476 01:06:11 好的妹子跟我来Okay, Dribbles. I got you, girl. Hey.
1477 01:06:15 扔进那里面Let's go right in there.
1478 01:06:17 给你洗干净好让你呆会又吐到上面Get you looking nice and clean so you can throw up on it later.
1479 01:06:29 感觉你这人生来就不长毛You look like you naturally have no body hair whatsoever.
1480 01:06:33 你经常给自己上油么?Do you oil yourself up a lot?
1481 01:06:35 只有当我要钻洞的时候才会When I need to get through a narrow shaft.
1482 01:06:37 警告 走开 这是我的Danger. Walk away. That's a black diamond slope.
1483 01:06:44 你干嘛不去玩？Why ain't you partying?
1484 01:06:46 因为今晚我是”派对家长”Because I'm the designated mom tonight.
1485 01:06:48 我要保证大伙的安全I'm keeping everybody safe.
1486 01:06:51 你有孩子么？Do you have kids?
1487 01:06:53 肯定有I'm sure I do.
1488 01:06:56 我去Shit.
1489 01:07:01 嘿 凯特 你还记得Hey, Kate. You remember when you scaled that
1490 01:07:03 你之前爬上横梁sucker right there up to the last beam
1491 01:07:05 然后大喊”我是炸弹！”and you hollered, "I'm the bomb!"
1492 01:07:07 如同昨天一般 哟Like it was yesterday, yo.
1493 01:07:09 来吧 凯特 你还等什么？Well, come on, Kate. What are you waiting for?
1494 01:07:10 大家一起喊 凯特 凯特！Come on, everybody. Kate, Kate!
1495 01:07:11 凯特 凯特！Kate, Kate, Kate!
1496 01:07:18 当你清醒的时候 你就会想”怎么会有人做这种蠢事”When you're sober, it's kind of like, "Why would anyone do this?"
1497 01:07:23 凯特 凯特！Kate, Kate, Kate!
1498 01:07:27 加油 凯特！Come on, Kate. Come on!
1499 01:07:29 真是可怕啊KATE: This is scary as shart.
1500 01:07:31 我当时怎么没摔死？How did I not die doing this?
1501 01:07:32 你们别试这玩意不安全Don't try this. This is not safe.
1502 01:07:35 有人把砖动过了Somebody moved these bricks.
1503 01:07:37 坚持住 妹子！Hang tight, lady!
1504 01:07:39 不是鸟怎么上的去啊This is for the fucking birds. Shitters.
1505 01:07:42 噢 大伙 快来Oh, you guys. You guys are gonna love this.
1506 01:07:45 别动 呆在原地Don't move. Stay right there.
1507 01:07:48 准备好了么？All right. Ready? Ready?
1508 01:07:50 好的 猜猜我是谁准备好了？Okay, guys, can you guess who I am? Ready?
1509 01:07:52 你想玩硬的？向我朋友问好吧You wanna play rough? Okay. Say hello to my little friend!
1510 01:07:58 奇克！不对 宗 不对 不对Cheech! No, Chong. ALEX: No, no, no.
1511 01:07:59 向找朋友问好吧！Say hello to my little friend!
1512 01:08:04 提姆·艾伦 不对ROB: Tim Allen. No.
1513 01:08:08 向我朋友问好吧 这是子弹 什么都没想到？Say hello to my little friend. Bullets? Nothing.
1514 01:08:12 我爱可卡因！因为我脸上有疤！I love cocaine! Because I have a scar on my face!
1515 01:08:26 这是甜叶菊！It's stevia! Psych!
1516 01:08:29 这是甜叶菊！It's stevia!
1517 01:08:36 嗯....Hmm...
1518 01:08:38 来吧 你们能猜到的！Come on. You can get this!
1519 01:08:48 那么 如果我读这本书So, if I read this,
1520 01:08:51 那我会更加了解你这个人吗？will I get, like, amazing insight into who you are'?
1521 01:08:53 恐怕不会 好吧I am afraid so. Okay.
1522 01:08:55 我隐藏得可深了 你绝对想不到Way behind the curtain. Like, in the broom closet.
1523 01:08:58 对我有点信心 开始吧Well, I like broom closets. Here we go.
1524 01:09:01 ”我试了下卫生棉条”"I tried tampons."
1525 01:09:03 ”不了谢谢 汤姆·汉克斯”"No thanks' Tom Hanks."
1526 01:09:05 ”感觉我摔倒冰棒上去了”"It felt like I fell down hard on a popsicle."
1527 01:09:07 老天Oh, man.
1528 01:09:09 这是上星期才记的That's from last week.
1529 01:09:12 这里面好东西真多It's good stuff in here.
1530 01:09:13 这是我送给你的礼物It's my gift to you.
1531 01:09:14 我喜欢 再多来点I love it. I want more.
1532 01:09:16 现在你告诉我个秘密Now you tell me a secret.
1533 01:09:19 好的Okay.
1534 01:09:21 我最近减肥了很多I lost a whole bunch of weight recently.
1535 01:09:24 大概63. 5斤Like, 70 pounds.
1536 01:09:26 哇 真厉害 嗯确实Wow. That's great. Yeah, it's a lot.
1537 01:09:28 好的 你再告诉点其他的All right, tell me something else.
1538 01:09:30 噢 额…On, uh...
1539 01:09:34 我离婚了I got divorced.
1540 01:09:39 所以你相当于减了181斤So, you lost, like, 200 pounds.
1541 01:09:48 我们…Let's...
1542 01:09:50 要试点东西吗？You wanna try something?
1543 01:09:51 好啊Okay.
1544 01:09:52 额…Um...
1545 01:09:55 数到3. . .嗯On the count of three... Mmm-hmm.
1546 01:09:57 我们说出自己害怕的东西Let's say what we're both afraid of.
1547 01:10:04 除非你不想玩I mean, unless you don't want to.
1548 01:10:06 不是 我并不怕说出来No, I'm not afraid to say it.
1549 01:10:09 好的 准备好了?Okay? Okay, ready?
1550 01:10:11 1BOTH: One.
1551 01:10:12 2Two.
1552 01:10:13 3Three.
1553 01:10:16 鳄鱼 被牛排噎住Alligators. Choking on a steak.
1554 01:10:20 不好玩Not great.
1555 01:10:25 我们真正说出自己害怕的东西Let's really say what we're afraid of.
1556 01:10:28 说真的Like, for real.
1557 01:10:30 好吧 可以？Okay, O Kay?
1558 01:10:36 准备好了？Ready?
1559 01:10:38 1 2 3BOTH: One, two, three.
1560 01:10:42 我害怕我是个无聊的人… 我害怕我减肥下来I'm afraid that I'm boring... I'm afraid that losing weight...
1561 01:10:44 而且我负担太多了 也不会有什么改观and I have too much baggage. Won't fix everything.
1562 01:10:52 你减肥是为了增强自信吗？Did you lose weight to gain self-confidence?
1563 01:10:58 不No.
1564 01:11:00 我减肥是为了I think I lost the weight
1565 01:11:02 能看到自己那完美的丁丁so I could gain a better view of my perfect penis.
1566 01:11:08 我想念那小家伙了并不小I missed the little guy. Not little.
1567 01:11:12 中等尺寸 我想那中等尺寸的家伙了Medium. I miss the medium guy.
1568 01:11:17 顺带一提 你一点也不无趣You are so not boring, by the way.
1569 01:11:20 你已经改观了不少了You've already fixed so many things.
1570 01:11:25 这里以前有很多东西的There used to be so much stuff here.
1571 01:11:29 我以前在这间阁楼就很有安全感This attic made me feel very safe.
1572 01:11:33 房子只是建统物而已Well, a house is just a building.
1573 01:11:36 家才是感觉Home is a feeling.
1574 01:11:40 说得真美好 谢谢That's beautiful. Thank you.
1575 01:11:41 谁说的Who said that?
1576 01:11:43 我说的 乱想的I did. Just now.
1577 01:11:54 额Ugh.
1578 01:11:56 你是让我吸接嘴烟(? 真抱歉Were you shotgunning me? I am so sorry.
1579 01:11:58 我误会了 我本来是想I misjudged the shotgun. I was going to.
1580 01:12:00 是我的错 我是想整你的It's my fault. I was showboating.
1581 01:12:02 真是抱歉I am so sorry about that.
1582 01:12:04 是你在和我说话？You talking to me?
1583 01:12:06 是你在和我说话？Is you talking to me?
1584 01:12:08 罗伯特·帕西诺Uh, Robert Pacino.
1585 01:12:09 啊！子弹用完了！Aah! No bullets!
1586 01:12:11 你干嘛不把头塞进你的菊花 看看能不能进去？Why don't you try sticking your head up your ass? See if it fits?
1587 01:12:15 是哪个来着…变相怪杰？不是What's the one... Grimace? No.
1588 01:12:18 你干嘛不把头塞进你的菊花？Why don't you try sticking your head up your ass? (LAUGHS)
1589 01:12:23 你干嘛不把头塞进你的菊花？Why don't you try sticking your head up your ass?
1590 01:12:25 看看能不能进去！看看能不能进去！See if it fits! See if it fits!
1591 01:12:27 甜叶菊Stevia!
1592 01:12:29 你干嘛不把头塞进你的菊花？Why don't you stick your head up your ass?
1593 01:12:32 看看能不能进去？See if n fits?
1594 01:12:34 你干嘛不把Why don't you try
1595 01:12:36 头塞进你的菊花 看看能不能进去?sticking your head up your ass and see if it fits?
1596 01:12:40 我放弃Pass.
1597 01:12:41 你干嘛不把头塞进你的菊花？看看能不能进去？Why don't you stick your head up your ass and see if it fits?
1598 01:12:43 疤面煞星！Scarface!
1599 01:12:45 疤面煞星 疤面煞星？Scarface. Scarface?
1600 01:12:47 对！Yes!
1601 01:12:48 我表演的就是他！That's who I was the whole fucking time!
1602 01:12:51 太棒了 老兄Awesome, man.
1603 01:12:53 你得冷静下You got to want it a little less.
1604 01:12:56 我能感觉到我头发长出来了！I can feel my hair growing!
1605 01:12:58 艾利克斯 走吧Alex, come on.
1606 01:13:00 听到了吗？是《Tipsy》!Do you hear that? It's Tipsy!
1607 01:13:02 我爱死这首歌了我要跳舞Oh, I love this song! I got to dance. Here we go.
1608 01:13:04 噢！Oh. Oh!
1609 01:13:06 嘿 厉害啊！Hey, you backing it up!
1610 01:13:08 这首歌就是你的主题曲了This is your theme now.
1611 01:13:09 谁 我？还是说所有人？Who, me? Or, e'rybody?
1612 01:13:10 啊 所有人Ah, e'rybody.
1613 01:13:11 Cause e'rybody got got to get tipsyCause e'rybody got got to get tipsy.
1614 01:13:14 What?What?
1615 01:13:16 耶！Yeah!
1616 01:13:17 E' rybody in the club get tipsyE'rybody in the club get tipsy.
1617 01:13:19 不只是你 不只是我 是所有人Not just you. Not just me. E'rybody.
1618 01:13:22 E' rybody. E'ry day, e'ry hour, e'ry minute.E'rybody. E'ry day, e'ry hour, e'ry minute.
1619 01:13:25 喝！Huh!
1620 01:13:29 老天啊！Oh, my God!
1621 01:13:31 老天啊 我来了Oh, God. Wait, come here. Come here.
1622 01:13:35 上来了 我爸会杀了我的！Here we go. My dad's gonna murder me!
1623 01:13:37 别怕 莫拉 看着我 我能修好Shh. Maura, look at me. I can fix this.
1624 01:13:40 我的天 快走Oh, God. Go. Go, go, go.
1625 01:13:43 呼！ 不不不！JAMES: Whoa! MAURA: No, no, no!
1626 01:13:45 喔 喔 喔JAMES: Whoa, whoa, whoa.
1627 01:13:47 不！No!
1628 01:14:02 我真的I'm really
1629 01:14:05 一大股鱼味itchy.
1630 01:14:06 吸进我鼻子里了It went up my nose.
1631 01:14:07 都进我菊花里去了It went up my butt.
1632 01:14:09 我们会死吗？Are we gonna die?
1633 01:14:10 不会 这玩意无害的 都是70年代的No, this stuff's safe. This is all from the '70s.
1634 01:14:13 哇！这里可够疯的！Wow! This is fucked up!
1635 01:14:22 我想玩之前玩过的那个泡沫玩法I wanna do that foam thing like we saw at the Fart Mitzvah.
1636 01:14:27 啊！Ah!
1637 01:14:33 噢！Ooh!
1638 01:14:34 我现在就得跟你去外面谈谈 噢I need to talk to you outside. Now. Oh. Oh.
1639 01:14:38 要打就打 我这就把耳环取掉 婊子Well, let's do this. My earrings are coming off, bohatch!
1640 01:14:41 干嘛 你准备拿那耳环打我吗？Why? You gonna hit me with your long-ass earlobes?
1641 01:14:44 哈哈哈Oh.
1642 01:14:45 我等这一刻等了好久了I have been waiting a long time for this.
1643 01:14:51 嘿！Hey!
1644 01:14:55 让我进去！Let me in!
1645 01:15:00 太过分了！This is bullshit!
1646 01:15:08 嘿情况如何？MAURA: Hey. How's everything going?
1647 01:15:10 我大展神威 钓男人叼得如何了？KATE: I'm crushing it. How's the man-harvest going?
1648 01:15:12 詹姆斯太帅了James is so hot.
1649 01:15:14 我的高中阴影都被他一驱而散了My high school heart cramp has turned into a heart-on.
1650 01:15:17 我被他迷住了 简直要被迷死了I have a heart-on for him. I have a raging heart-on.
1651 01:15:20 我不懂解释一下 我要被…I don't get it. Explain it more. I have a...
1652 01:15:22 这是谁干的 我干的KATE: Who the hell did that'? MAURA: I did.
1653 01:15:25 你真够厉害的!You are so badass!
1654 01:15:28 去他妈的基尔！BOTH: Fuck the Geernts!
1655 01:15:30 好了 我要回去了 拜！Okay, I'm gonna dive back in. Bye!
1656 01:15:31 该死的派对Fucking party.
1657 01:15:40 中奖了Jackpot.
1658 01:15:58 泡沫派对！Foam party!
1659 01:16:01 大家来玩吧！Strip it down, town!
1660 01:16:04 该死 是我父母Oh, shit. It's my parents!
1661 01:16:06 都闭嘴 是她父母！Shut the fuck up! It's her parents!
1662 01:16:09 大家都闭嘴 我要打喷嚏了！Everyone, I'm gonna sneeze, shut the fuck up!
1663 01:16:18 哈喽？Hello?
1664 01:16:19 嗨 你在家呢！我们要过来玩You're home! We're coming over.
1665 01:16:22 别 别过来玩Oh, no, don't come over.
1666 01:16:25 我们穿着睡衣在看呢We're just in our pj's watching Risky Business.
1667 01:16:28 莫拉告诉我们一个好消息Maura told us the wonderful news about you and Haley moving to Orlando!
1668 01:16:30 说你和海莉要搬来奥兰多了！
1669 01:16:34 而且你还找到工作了And Wu got a job!
1670 01:16:36 虽然她不该多嘴不过确实是Not hers to tell, but okay.
1671 01:16:38 你爸和我有个主意You: Dad and t got an idea.
1672 01:16:40 而且我们现在只喝了半醉And we're only medium drunk.
1673 01:16:42 能直接告诉我重点吗？Could you headline news it for me?
1674 01:16:44 好的Yes.
1675 01:16:46 我们准备把50%卖房的钱给你We are gonna give you 50% of the money from the sale of the house
1676 01:16:50 然后拿剩下的50%付清公寓and then we're gonna use the other 50% to pay off the condo.
1677 01:16:54 然后把家具那些都留给莫拉And we're leaving Maura the stocks.
1678 01:16:56 我们想着你应该用得上这笔钱DEANNA: We though! That you could use the money
1679 01:16:59 拿去给你和海莉买座房子to buy a little house for you and Haley.
1680 01:17:02 这笔钱需要还给你们吗？Would I have to pay the money back?
1681 01:17:04 还是说属于那种”父母债”?Or would it be more of a "wink-wink" loan?
1682 01:17:06 我们送给你的We're giving it to you.
1683 01:17:07 免费的For free.
1684 01:17:08 表达我们对你的爱DEANNA: As a love gift.
1685 01:17:09 这可帮大忙了That solves a lot of things.
1686 01:17:13 好的 我现在得挂了 太感谢了Okay, I got to go now. Thanks so much.
1687 01:17:15 好Okle dokle.
1688 01:17:16 把你们用过的茶杯都洗干净Wash and dry any tea cups you use,
1689 01:17:18 还有 我们真为你感到高兴and we're very happy for you, honey.
1690 01:17:21 好的 谢谢 拜！Okay, thanks, bye!
1691 01:17:23 我了个去Holy shit.
1692 01:17:34 我了个去Holy shit.
1693 01:17:36 罗伯 罗伯！Rob, Rob, Rob!
1694 01:17:39 我是炸弹！I'm the bomb!
1695 01:17:43 我是炸弹！我是炸弹！I'm the bomb! I'm the bomb!
1696 01:17:52 好的大伙Okay. Guys?
1697 01:17:53 不好意思 我得请你们I'm actually gonna need everyone to just
1698 01:17:55 都离开回家了start cleaning up the area where they're standing.
1699 01:18:07 大家都请聚过来Everybody, gamer round, okay?
1700 01:18:09 我刚抽了点21世纪的大麻I just smoked some 21st century pot.
1701 01:18:12 我有几句话想说 长话短说So I need to say my mind. Make it quick.
1702 01:18:14 露出奶子！Release your boobs!
1703 01:18:16 别我奶子已经睡着了No, my boobs are sleeping right now.
1704 01:18:18 还要冬眠6周！Six more weeks of winter!
1705 01:18:20 我想谢谢我姐姐 凯特 自愿做苦力活I wanna thank my sister, Kate, for holding down the fort
1706 01:18:24 让我体验了一生中最棒的夜晚and helping me have the best night of my life.
1707 01:18:27 赶紧说Wrapping it up.
1708 01:18:29 为了发扬我姐姐的精神In the spirit of my sister,
1709 01:18:30 我鼓励大家今晚在这房子里留下自己的记号I encourage all of you to make your mark on this house tonight.
1710 01:18:35 别 别留下你们的记号No, do not make your mark.
1711 01:18:37 好了 我酌小鲜肉在哪？Where's my handyman?
1712 01:18:39 嘿 我喜欢你这么诚实面对自己Hey. I like that you know who you are.
1713 01:18:41 还努力争取自己想要的东西And that you ask for what you want.
1714 01:18:43 而且我认为你很可爱 谢谢And I think you're really cute. Thank you.
1715 01:18:45 不过随便了 老兄 好多人都挺可爱的 别太自恋了But, whatever, dude. A lo! Of people are cute, so relax.
1716 01:18:47 好吧Okay.
1717 01:18:49 说真的 大伙MAURA: Anyway, seriously, you guys.
1718 01:18:51 记住自己的真实面貌 并且做真实的自己！Remember who you really are and be that you!
1719 01:18:56 做真实的谁? 自己！Be that what? You!
1720 01:18:57 什么真实的自己 做！What that you? Be!
1721 01:18:59 做什么样的自己？Be what you?
1722 01:19:01 真实！That!
1723 01:19:02 自己！You!
1724 01:19:03 是”真实”是”真实的自己”It's "that," it's fucking "be that you!"
1725 01:19:05 做真实的自己！做真实的自己！Be that you! Be that you! Be that you!
1726 01:19:07 知道了 别朝我吼DAVE: All right, don't yell at me.
1727 01:19:08 我说了3次了 别朝我吼I just did it three times! Don't yell at me!
1728 01:19:10 谁吼你了？Who's yelling?
1729 01:19:11 再来一次 做什么样的自己？One more time. Be what you?
1730 01:19:12 真实！That!
1731 01:19:14 没错！我下台了You got it! I'm out.
1732 01:19:17 谢谢大伙 晚安 我们关门了Thank you. Good night. We are closed.
1733 01:19:20 去外面玩去！Take the party outside!
1734 01:19:25 不对 是那边KATE: No, that way.
1735 01:19:26 大伙 是那边Guys, that way!
1736 01:19:34 演讲不错I liked your speech.
1737 01:19:35 我去卧室等你I'm meeting you in the bedroom.
1738 01:19:37 我还要去修房顶呢I'm going in there to fix the drywall.
1739 01:19:39 好吧好吧Okay. Okay.
1740 01:19:43 一借过一失陪了Excuse me, please. Excuse me.
1741 01:19:47 阿历克斯 马上把丁丁从油漆里取出来Alex, take your dick out of the paint, right this minute!
1742 01:19:50 不！我要画画！No! I'm gonna draw suh-in!
1743 01:19:53 我就像毕加索一样I'm like a little Pablo Dickasso!
1744 01:19:58 老兄 抓到你了！Hey, man. I got you. Shit!
1745 01:20:03 是的 我邻居派对太吵了Yes, my neighbors are having a loud party,
1746 01:20:05 我想投诉and I'd like to complain.
1747 01:20:06 我需要你赶紧来让他们停下I need you to shut it down.
1748 01:20:09 噢 老兄KATE: Oh, man.
1749 01:20:11 谁叫的警察啊？Who called the cops?
1750 01:20:13 在办派对呢？Having a pretty big party, huh?
1751 01:20:16 噢 500人太吵了吗？Oh, is 500 people too much?
1752 01:20:18 警察叔叔！MAURA: POPO! POPO!
1753 01:20:20 有人叫了脱衣舞男？Oh, somebody call a stripper?
1754 01:20:22 想脱衣服跳舞吗？你不能进来You gonna take your clothes off for us? You can't come in here.
1755 01:20:24 除非你有法官签署的文件 我来处理Without the judge signing the thing. I got this.
1756 01:20:27 这是我住的地方This is where I live.
1757 01:20:28 这是我们的房子 对This is our house. Yep.
1758 01:20:30 这是我们住的地方 懂吗?This where we live, okay?
1759 01:20:31 接下来的24小时内都是我们的房产And this is our property for the next 24 hours.
1760 01:20:34 里面有很多人要嘿咻 各种性感节目A lot of sex is gonna happen. A lot of sexy times.
1761 01:20:36 你干涉不了You can't stop that.
1762 01:20:38 就我所知 嘿咻是不犯法的Last time I checked, sex wasn't against the law,
1763 01:20:40 虽然你是很想阻止我们 对吧?as much as you would love that, wouldn't you?
1764 01:20:42 莫拉 收敛点 赶紧滚蛋吧 小子Maura, please behave. Why don't you step off, blue?
1765 01:20:43 你不知道我是疯子吗?混蛋Don't you know I'm loco? Shit!
1766 01:20:46 现在知道了Now we know that.
1767 01:20:47 甜甜圈警官Officer Donuts.
1768 01:20:49 你赶紧爬回你的警车里吧Why don't you go back into your squad car
1769 01:20:50 然后去把猫从树上救下来and go save a kitten from a tree,
1770 01:20:51 因为我们妹子玩得可好了because these pussies are doing fine.
1771 01:20:54 懂了吗？把耳朵里的甜甜圈清理干净All right? Clean the donuts out of your ears
1772 01:20:56 好好听我嘴里说出来的话and hear the words that are coming out of my mouth.
1773 01:20:58 我会保护好自己的财产I will protect my all's
1774 01:20:59 不受你们这群人剥削也包括”Moi”property from all y'all and that's including moi.
1775 01:21:02 那是”我”的意思That means "me."
1776 01:21:03 一那是”我”的意思一不是指你It means "me." I don't... It doesn't mean you.
1777 01:21:05 我不需要防着她她是我姐姐I don't need to protect anything from her. That's my sister.
1778 01:21:07 一好吧一出自同一个人就是我们爸爸Right. From the same mister, who's our dad.
1779 01:21:10 所以你最好闭嘴吧白痴警察叔叔So, wrap your mind around that, Cap'n Crunch.
1780 01:21:12 懂了吧？Capeach?
1781 01:21:14 我知道你是怎样的人属于那种好好先生对吧？I know something about you. You're a nice person, right?
1782 01:21:16 你长得就像典型的美国人And you look like a Ken doll, hopefully with the genitals. Fingers crossed.
1783 01:21:17 祈祷你丁丁也够大祈祷吧
1784 01:21:20 你选了一个很值得尊敬的事业我向你敬礼You've picked a very great profession. And I salute you.
1785 01:21:23 但是你知道吗这才是我敬礼的方式But you know what? This is how I'll salute you.
1786 01:21:25 像这样抱歉Like this. I'm sorry.
1787 01:21:27 等下刚才那一幕是假的别往心里去KATE: Wait, that didn't happen, nobody saw that.
1788 01:21:28 交给我MAURA: I got this.
1789 01:21:30 一你写什么呢？一没什么这是我的本子What are you writing down? Nothing. It's my pad.
1790 01:21:31 听好我有一句话你该写上MAURA: Here, I have something you should write down.
1791 01:21:33 吃E-A-T.
1792 01:21:35 屎S-H-I-T.
1793 01:21:36 我妹妹玩得太疯了Okay, my sister is clearly riding the ditch at this late hour.
1794 01:21:41 你能解散下他们吗？Can you shut this shit down?
1795 01:21:42 刚才那是莫拉·埃利斯？Was that Maura Ellis?
1796 01:21:44 是Yeah.
1797 01:21:46 她和我那有脊柱裂的表弟She went to the sophomore formal
1798 01:21:48 一起参加的大二社团with my cousin who has spina bifida.
1799 01:21:49 就是她Of course she did!
1800 01:21:51 你妹妹人可好了 我表弟经常挂在嘴边She is a lovely person. He still talks about it.
1801 01:21:54 -好吧 - 这样吧Yeah. You know what?
1802 01:21:57 你们好好玩吧You guys enjoy your party.
1803 01:21:58 别别别No. No, no.
1804 01:22:00 别等下！No. No! Wait!
1805 01:22:01 里面有个喝醉了 拿着枪到处跑的人There's a drunk, blind guy swinging a gun around!
1806 01:22:05 不可能好好玩吧No way. Enjoy!
1807 01:22:07 操Fuck!
1808 01:22:14 嗨Hey.
1809 01:22:15 修得如何了？How's it going in here?
1810 01:22:17 应该还不错Good, I think.
1811 01:22:18 嗯 差不多弄好了Yeah, I think you're all set.
1812 01:22:20 我明天还得来检查一趟I'm gonna have to come back tomorrow and finish this,
1813 01:22:23 怕我现在喝醉了没用好because I am drunk and stoned.
1814 01:22:27 好吧 我现在还很清醒Well, I'm totally sober, so. Yeah.
1815 01:22:29 我修得丑死了I did a really bad job.
1816 01:22:30 你真高啊 你身高多高？You're very tall. How tall are you?
1817 01:22:32 大概一米九一加上梯子的话大概二米二九About 6'3". With the ladder, about 7'6".
1818 01:22:37 差不多吧…So, I'm just gonna...
1819 01:22:39 真谢谢你把这烂摊子收拾得这么干净Thanks so much for cleaning this all up.
1820 01:22:42 没关系Oh, yeah.
1821 01:22:45 想加班吗？Do you wanna keep working off the clock?
1822 01:22:48 我的床坏了Yeah. Because my bed is broken.
1823 01:22:50 需要我帮你修下么？Do you want me to fix it?
1824 01:22:51 要把门锁上Yeah. Lock the door.
1825 01:22:54 大伙 我是管事的 我宣布结束了People, I'm in charge here, and I say it's over.
1826 01:22:58 好吗 我们玩得够尽兴了 该结束了Okay? We had a great time. Let's wrap it up.
1827 01:23:01 不！No!
1828 01:23:03 啥情况？Why? What?
1829 01:23:08 这主意太棒了This is such a brilliant idea!
1830 01:23:10 免费的滑梯Free slicking.
1831 01:23:14 我希望我们能有点润滑剂I wish we had some lubricant.
1832 01:23:18 你喷的什么香水？What perfume is on you?
1833 01:23:20 喜欢吗？喜欢You like that? Yeah, I do.
1834 01:23:21 詹妮弗·洛芙·休伊特产的”Risky”It's Risky by Jennifer Love Hewitt.
1835 01:23:23 在大牌店才能买到You can only get it at Kohl's.
1836 01:23:26 我喷的是CK牌的”勃起”I'm wearing Erection by Calvin Klein.
1837 01:23:29 简直不敢相信！I cannot!
1838 01:23:35 我到底做了什么事让你这么恨我What did I ever do to you to make you abhor me so?
1839 01:23:39 你还真敢问？Are you seriously asking?
1840 01:23:41 你估计都不记得了You probably don't remember.
1841 01:23:42 我当然记得了Oh, I remember.
1842 01:23:43 我们当时本来要举办一次历史最棒的埃利斯姐妹派对We were about to have the best Ellis Island party ever
1843 01:23:46 因为我表弟在迪斯尼乐园遇到了约翰·斯塔摩斯而且他打算来的because my cousin met John Stamos at Disney and he was coming.
1844 01:23:49 结果你却去给你那警察老爸报密But you narced to your cop dad.
1845 01:23:52 是他逼我说漏嘴的I narced because he made me!
1846 01:23:54 怎么会 他怎么可能知道How? How did he even know?
1847 01:23:56 因为当我发现你们没邀请我的时候Because when I found out that I wasn't invited to your party
1848 01:23:59 我伤心死了 大吐特吐it hurt me so very deep' that I threw up really hard.
1849 01:24:04 你们干嘛不邀请我？Why didn't you invite me?
1850 01:24:08 为什么？Why?
1851 01:24:10 我人又好又干净I was kind and clean!
1852 01:24:13 而且大多数学科都能拿BAnd I got mostly B's!
1853 01:24:14 我知道 我抄的就是你昀I know, I cheated off you.
1854 01:24:15 然后你决定我是”No”And then you decided that I was a "no."
1855 01:24:18 然后大家都认为我是”No”And then everybody decided that I was a "no"!
1856 01:24:21 然后猜猜看接下来是谁认为我是”No”了？And then guess who decided that I was a "no"?
1857 01:24:25 单身汉们？The Bachelor?
1858 01:24:26 我自己Me.
1859 01:24:28 所以我觉得 今晚我应该在这玩So, I have decided that tonight I deserve to be here.
1860 01:24:34 今晚 我是”Yes”Tonight, I am a "yes."
1861 01:24:38 我是”Hell Yes”I am a "hell yes"!
1862 01:24:41 我是”Yeah”I am a "yeah."
1863 01:24:43 我是”Hell yeah”I am a "hell yeah."
1864 01:24:45 我是”Fuck to the yeah”！I am a "fuck to the yeah"!
1865 01:24:48 语言大师 我是”Yippie-ki-yay yes”！Wordsmith. I am a "yippie-ki-yay yes"!
1866 01:24:51 而你知道最悲剧的是什么吗？And you know what the saddest part is?
1867 01:24:53 你的阴道？Your vagina?
1868 01:24:54 不是No.
1869 01:24:55 最悲剧的是The saddest part
1870 01:24:58 以前小学的时候我俩关系可好了is that you and I used to have a blast in grade school.
1871 01:25:00 而且我们能一直当朋友的And we would probably still be friends
1872 01:25:03 要不是你变成了一个自私的疯子的话if you weren't such a selfish hothead.
1873 01:25:06 我不是自私的疯子！I am not a selfish hothead!
1874 01:25:10 把手机放下！给我 不给！Put that phone down! Give me that. No!
1875 01:25:12 手机给我！给我！Give me that phone! Give me that!
1876 01:25:14 不 别碰我手机No! Don't touch my phone.
1877 01:25:15 莫拉！莫拉！Maura! Maura!
1878 01:25:22 嗨 宝贝Hi, honey.
1879 01:25:24 嗨 妈妈 我到了HALEY: Hi, Mom, I'm here.
1880 01:25:25 我在外公外婆这I'm at Gram and Gramps'.
1881 01:25:27 你到了？到奥兰多了? 对You're here? In Orlando? Yeah.
1882 01:25:30 噢 太好了 好吧Oh, great. Okay.
1883 01:25:32 他们说要帮我们买房子They told me that they're gonna help us get a house.
1884 01:25:34 你想不想我去你那边 然后我们好好商量下Do you want me to come down there and we can talk about it?
1885 01:25:37 额 我们整理房间累死了Uh, we're all pretty wiped from packing.
1886 01:25:40 要我说的话 你今晚就好好休息You know, I would say maybe just get some rest and...
1887 01:25:42 明早再来吧So come over in the morning.
1888 01:25:44 等下 你想要我明早再去?Wait. You want me to come there in the morning?
1889 01:25:46 你追问我的下落都追问了几周了You have been begging me for weeks to tell you where I am,
1890 01:25:48 现在我回来了你又不见我？and now that I'm here you're gonna blow me off?
1891 01:25:50 我不是不见你No, I'm not blowing you off!
1892 01:25:51 我是太兴奋了 我们要买房了I'm so excited! We're getting a house,
1893 01:25:53 你也可以有自己的房间了and you're gonna have your own room.
1894 01:25:54 我的丁丁是假的！I got a baloney dick!
1895 01:25:56 谁的丁丁是假的？谁也不是Who has a baloney dick? Nobody.
1896 01:26:00 你现在在开派对？HALEY: Are you at a party right now?
1897 01:26:02 之前在开我们野餐了一下Earlier. We had a packing cookout.
1898 01:26:05 露出丁丁野餐Cookout with your cock oui.
1899 01:26:08 我在接电话！I'm on the phone!
1900 01:26:09 你说的你想重新开始You say that you want a fresh start
1901 01:26:11 大家都在帮我们and everyone is trying to help us out,
1902 01:26:14 而这就是你回报他们的方式？and this is how you thank them?
1903 01:26:16 木是你想的那样 就是我想的那样It's not what you think. No, it's exactly what I think.
1904 01:26:19 我都开始相信你了 你却一转身I start trusting you again and then you turn around
1905 01:26:21 然后又变成 《橘郡男孩》里的家庭主妇那样了and you start acting like one of the Rea! Housewives of Orange County.
1906 01:26:24 你能给我个机会改正吗？Can you just give me a chance to make it right?
1907 01:26:26 不能！我不想和我那天天开派对的老妈住在一起No! I don't wanna live with my loser mom who parties.
1908 01:26:30 我直说吧 今晚You know what? Tonight,
1909 01:26:31 我是唯一一个没在玩的人I'm actually the only person who's not partying.
1910 01:26:34 你就吹吧Yeah, right.
1911 01:26:43 不管了Fuck it.
1912 01:26:48 凯特！凯特！凯特！ALL: Kale! Kate! Kate!
1913 01:27:16 嘿帕祖祖我开始玩了Hey. Lollapazuzu, I'm partying now.
1914 01:27:19 你准备好对付我了吗？You ready for me?
1915 01:27:21 我早就准备好了I've been ready.
1916 01:27:22 我的安全语是”继续”My safe word is "Keep going."
1917 01:27:24 我不需要安全语 你会需要的I don't need one. You will.
1918 01:27:29 我没买保险I don't have insurance.
1919 01:28:03 你脸真漂亮You have such a good, solid, man face.
1920 01:28:06 我要对你做坏事 是吗？I'm gonna do stuff to you right now. YOU are?
1921 01:28:08 是的 好吧Yes. Okay.
1922 01:28:09 把裤子脱掉 抱歉Put your pants off. I'm sorry.
1923 01:28:10 本来我想淑女点的I meant to say that a little smoother
1924 01:28:12 但我现在喝醉了 还磕了药 快脱but I'm very, very drunk, plus stoned. Let's go.
1925 01:28:14 把皮带解掉 把裤子脱了Just open up your parts. Put your pants off.
1926 01:28:16 好 马上就脱No, no, no. I'm putting them off right now.
1927 01:28:17 马上脱好了 耶！Yep, here we go. Yeah!
1928 01:28:24 你有孩子吗？You have kids?
1929 01:28:26 2个女儿都在韩国 我想死她们了Two girls in Korea. Oh, I miss them bad.
1930 01:28:30 距离真远啊So far.
1931 01:28:31 我把她们的头发放在我的BRA里I put their hairs in my bra.
1932 01:28:35 我想念她头发弄湿之后的味道I miss how my daughter smells when she has wet hair.
1933 01:28:40 她死了? 没She die'? No.
1934 01:28:42 我都有一整个夏天没见着她了I haven't been able to find her, like, all summer.
1935 01:28:46 这简直太悲催了That is fucked up.
1936 01:28:48 你还说我 你孩子还在另一个国家呢Don't judge me. Your kids are in another country.
1937 01:28:50 这才叫悲催That's fucked up.
1938 01:28:52 我努力工作就为了I work my butt to save my kids
1939 01:28:57 让她们过来和我一起生活so they can come live with me.
1940 01:28:59 我以前还是小儿放射科医生呢I used to be pediatric radiologist.
1941 01:29:02 啥？What?
1942 01:29:03 你又为了你孩子做过什么？What do you do for your kid?
1943 01:29:06 嗯？Hmm?
1944 01:29:18 要抱抱吗？You wanna hug?
1945 01:29:22 过来让这妹子抱抱Yeah, give this messy bitch a hug.
1946 01:29:25 凯特 怎么了 宝贝？Katie, what's the matter, baby?
1947 01:29:27 啊别哭了你哭我都想哭了Aw, look at you. Don't cry. It's gonna make me cry.
1948 01:29:30 这里的人还真挺辛苦的People are really working their shit out at this thing.
1949 01:29:33 就和韩国电视剧一样This is like Korean drama.
1950 01:29:36 小心！呼！Heads up! Whoo!
1951 01:29:54 酒没了You're out of booze.
1952 01:29:56 这就去I'm on it.
1953 01:29:59 ”派对老妈”出动Party mom to the rescue.
1954 01:30:01 好的 我们一秒后开始Okay, we're gonna get started in one second.
1955 01:30:03 好的Okay.
1956 01:30:05 你好啊Hello.
1957 01:30:07 嘿 你是1号Hey, you're number one.
1958 01:30:09 好的 现在把节奏加快点Okay, let's take it up a notch.
1959 01:30:10 你知道现在是什么时问吗 不知道Okay, you know what time it is? No.
1960 01:30:13 是玩蜡烛的时间了 噢哦It's candle play time. Uh-oh!
1961 01:30:17 我是先提醒你 上次我和科学怪人I should warn you that this did not go well
1962 01:30:20 这么玩的时候 结局可不太好when I was having sex with Frankenstein.
1963 01:30:23 火最讨厌了Fire bad.
1964 01:30:25 啊 好我准备好了Oh. Ah. Yeah, I'm ready.
1965 01:30:26 噢！Oh!
1966 01:30:27 没想到这么…太烫了太烫了I didn't think... That's wild. That's wild.
1967 01:30:30 我去 我还以为我不喜欢这么玩呢 不过我喜欢Oh, God. I didn't think I was gonna like it, but I like it.
1968 01:30:32 这玩意怎么熄了？How does this sucker not stay lit?
1969 01:30:34 好的 等我下Okay. Hold the sex phone.
1970 01:30:36 好 有什么招都使出来All right. Just getting into it.
1971 01:30:38 快看这是什么Oh, look who we have here.
1972 01:30:40 加菲猫Garfield!
1973 01:30:41 加菲猫最好玩了 嗯他…Garfield always comes through. Yeah, he's...
1974 01:30:43 他来陪我们玩玩 老天啊！He's gonna help us out. (SCREAMING) Oh, God!
1975 01:30:46 老天啊！Oh, God!
1976 01:30:48 该死！Shit. Fuck!
1977 01:30:49 哦不操！Oh! No! Shit!
1978 01:30:54 老天啊！My God!
1979 01:30:59 啊操！Oh, fuck!
1980 01:31:01 摔倒尖东西上了？对对对！Did you fall on something sharp? Yeah, yeah, yeah!
1981 01:31:02 好的 插到直肠里去了吗?Okay, did it go up inside of you by way of your rectum?
1982 01:31:07 嗯 应该是Yeah, I think so.
1983 01:31:08 感觉像是小奖杯或者纪念品的大小It feels like a small trophy or... (GRUNTS) A collectible.
1984 01:31:13 詹姆斯 我是护士James, I am a nurse. Okay?
1985 01:31:16 不管里面是什么我都能弄出来I can get whatever is up there out.
1986 01:31:19 我不要你看我菊花No, I don't want you to look.
1987 01:31:20 我不是莫拉 不是你刚刚亲吻的那个女孩It's not Maura, the woman that you were kissing who's gonna look.
1988 01:31:24 我是才到现场的护士 好吧It's a nurse who just got here. Okay.
1989 01:31:26 你好 先生 很高兴见到你Hello, sir. Nice to meet you for the first time.
1990 01:31:29 好的 好的Okay. All right. Okay.
1991 01:31:30 你侧面躺下 我好检查你的直肠I'm just gonna roll you over so I can examine your rectum.
1992 01:31:33 别再说”直肠”了Okay. Stop. Stop saying rectum.
1993 01:31:36 不管是什么我都帮你取出来 嗯好I'm gonna get it out, whatever it is. Mmm-hmm. Okay.
1994 01:31:38 我稍微扭一下 然后慢慢取出来 嗯嗯So I'm just gonna twist it, and pull it out slowly. Mmm-hmm.
1995 01:31:41 深呼吸Just breathe.
1996 01:31:47 是音乐盒It's a music box.
1997 01:31:49 嗯Yep.
1998 01:31:51 是我的芭蕾舞音乐盒 嗯哼It's my ballerina music box. Mmm-hmm.
1999 01:31:54 而且角度调到了最高And she's in high-fifth position, which is why she went in so easily.
2000 01:31:56 所以这么容易就进去了
2001 01:31:57 好的Okay.
2002 01:31:59 全塞进去了吗？Is it past the tutu?
2003 01:32:04 是 嗯Yeah. Mmm.
2004 01:32:06 所以你才能听到声音That's why it's catching.
2005 01:32:07 好的 詹姆斯 我试个方法So, okay, James, I'm gonna try something here.
2006 01:32:10 不了我没事 没事的No. Nah' I'm good. It's okay.
2007 01:32:12 我懂的忍耐下I know, I know. Just give me a second.
2008 01:32:13 好的忍住！Okay, hold on!
2009 01:32:14 那玩意在我体内转动！让它播完That's turning inside me! Just let it wind down.
2010 01:32:29 应该马上结束了I think it's almost done.
2011 01:32:31 是瑞典制造的所以可能时间有点长It's Swiss-made, so it may take a while.
2012 01:32:35 这首歌有多长？How long is this fucking song?
2013 01:32:38 这旋律确实很动听It really is a beautiful melody.
2014 01:32:40 贝多芬真是个天才Beethoven. What a... What a genius.
2015 01:32:43 嗯嗯Mmm-hmm.
2016 01:32:46 看来…还没And we're do... Nope.
2017 01:32:49 一又重头开始了一嗯It went around again. Yeah.
2018 01:32:50 好的这样吧我站起来Okay, you know what'? I'm gonna hop up.
2019 01:32:52 一你行吗？一没问题嗯Okay. You got it? Yeah, I got it-Yeah, no, no.
2020 01:32:55 It didn't happen. It never happened.
2021 01:32:57 詹姆斯说真的James, seriously.
2022 01:32:59 动作慢点小心点Be gentle. Be very, very careful.
2023 01:33:01 这裙子借给我了I'm gonna borrow this.
2024 01:33:02 别出去出丑Let's not make this the headline of the night.
2025 01:33:04 以后我们肯定会笑这事的We are gonna laugh about this someday.
2026 01:33:05 这还不是我见过的最严重的直肠事故You know, that is not the worst rectal accident I've ever seen.
2027 01:33:08 谢谢安慰Thanks for that.
2028 01:33:09 真感谢你清理的这摊粘液啊凯特！Thanks for cleaning up the fucking gel, Kate!
2029 01:33:14 我了个去Holy shit.
2030 01:33:16 一帮我洗掉一是吗?Help me wash it off. Yeah?
2031 01:33:18 凯特？Kate?
2032 01:33:20 有人看到我姐姐了吗?Has anyone seen my sister?
2033 01:33:21 她没喝酒她得开车载我们去医院She's sober and she needs to drive us to the hospital.
2034 01:33:24 我好像长坏疽了I think I got the gangrene.
2035 01:33:27 我刚才好像上了个复印机I might have fucked a copy machine!
2036 01:33:29 老天啊Good Lord.
2037 01:33:30 你没事吧？Are you okay?
2038 01:33:32 我把结婚戒指吞下去了I swallowed my wedding ring!
2039 01:33:37 我钱包哪去了？Where's my purse?
2040 01:33:38 (CELL PHONE CHIMES)
2041 01:33:43 嗯Hmm?
2042 01:33:48 嘿 莫拉阿姨 我到奥兰多了HALEY: Hey, Aunt Maura. I just landed in Orlando!
2043 01:33:51 谢谢你开导我Thanks for our conversation.
2044 01:33:53 真感谢你劝我过来 我很信任你的I 'm glad you talked me into coming down-I do trust you.
2045 01:33:56 我把你公寓的警报系统设好了I set the alarm at your condo,
2046 01:33:58 然后找你的吩咐 把我的钥匙给了狗保姆and I gave my keys to your pet-sitter, like you told me.
2047 01:34:00 然后我发了张我和”波伦塔”的照片给你她可想你了And I sent you a picture o? Me and Polenta. She misses you.
2048 01:34:09 你在看玩笑Oh, hell no.
2049 01:34:11 我钱包哪去了？你们见到了吗？Where is my purse? Have you seen it anywhere?
2050 01:34:13 刚才还在这的It was just here.
2051 01:34:18 我去Oh, shit.
2052 01:34:20 再来点甜叶菊！More stevia!
2053 01:34:21 风云?号可没这种副作用Cloud Nine didn't have this glitch in it.
2054 01:34:24 嘿 冷静点Hey! Calm down.
2055 01:34:27 压路机！Oh, steamroller!
2056 01:34:29 压路机！Steamroller!
2057 01:34:31 圣诞老人 快救我！Santa, help me!
2058 01:34:42 好的 晚安Okay, good night.
2059 01:34:44 晚安 小王子Good night, sweet prince.
2060 01:34:51 詹姆斯James!
2061 01:34:53 詹姆斯James.
2062 01:34:56 唐姆斯 我载你去医院James, let me get you to a hospital.
2063 01:34:57 不 我没事了 事实上…No, I'm all right. The thing is...
2064 01:34:58 莫拉 谢谢你帮我 但我自己会做打算Maura, thank you for your help, but I know what's best for me.
2065 01:35:01 而现在…And right now...
2066 01:35:02 我需要和我的菊花单独呆会I think I need to be alone with my asshole.
2067 01:35:05 好吧 晚安莫拉Okay. Good night, Maura.
2068 01:35:08 我还要甜叶菊！ALEX: I need more stevia!
2069 01:35:11 凯特哪去了？Where's Kate?
2070 01:35:13 她去买酒了Oh, she went to go get booze.
2071 01:35:15 她可是烂醉如泥She was pretty drunk.
2072 01:35:16 向我朋友问好吧 我就知道Say hello to my little friend! Of course she was.
2073 01:35:21 开始派对吧！Let's get this party started!
2074 01:35:25 他吃了云粉10号He's on Cloud 10!
2075 01:35:29 我是艾利克斯I'm Alex.
2076 01:35:30 我们去舞台把老鼠药都跳出来We are going to dance floor to dance out the rat poison.
2077 01:35:33 什么鬼？What the fuck?
2078 01:35:39 抱歉 等下 等下Hey. I'm sorry. Hold on one second. Hold on one second.
2079 01:35:42 老天啊 妈妈？Oh-my God! Mom?
2080 01:35:43 嗯 我马上来Yeah, I'll be right there.
2081 01:35:45 我开玩笑的I'm kidding!
2082 01:35:48 谢谢你们终于肯笑了 你们这群混球！But thanks for finally laughing, you fucking assholes! (LAUGHS)
2083 01:35:57 我要杀了她！Oh, I'm gonna kill her!
2084 01:35:59 我妹妹在哪?Where's my sister?
2085 01:36:05 凯特！Kate!
2086 01:36:06 妹子打架了！Girl fight!
2087 01:36:07 莫拉Maura!
2088 01:36:08 凯特！莫拉！Kate! Maura!
2089 01:36:10 妹子打架了！Girl fight!
2090 01:36:11 我姐姐在哪?Where's my sister?
2091 01:36:14 妹子打架了！KELLY: Girl fight!
2092 01:36:28 快跑！Go, go, go!
2093 01:36:45 我们成功了 大伙We did it, you guys.
2094 01:36:47 我们停止了时间！We stopped time!
2095 01:36:52 下雪了！It's snowing!
2096 01:36:55 太好了！Yes! Yes!
2097 01:37:02 老天啊 大伙注意DAVE: Oh, my God. You guys.
2098 01:37:04 塌陷了！Sinkhole!
2099 01:37:15 我去！On, shit!
2100 01:37:18 快看！Look at this!
2101 01:37:19 老天啊Oh, my God.
2102 01:37:20 老天啊Oh, my God!
2103 01:37:23 塌陷了塌陷了There's a sinkhole. There's a sinkhole.
2104 01:37:25 你看看Look at this.
2105 01:37:26 你给我说的你会管好这场派对You told me you were gonna take care of things
2106 01:37:28 结果却发生这种事and you let everything go to shit.
2107 01:37:30 你哪去了？Where did you go?
2108 01:37:31 本来是你该不碰酒我该能嘿咻的You were supposed to stay sober. I was supposed to get laid!
2109 01:37:33 噢 真抱歉啊 你之前Oh, I'm so sorry that you couldn't get
2110 01:37:35 那么多次嘿咻的机会自己没把握好laid for the five millionth time in your life.
2111 01:37:38 噢 我想要丁丁的时候随时都能得到Oh, I get! I get my fucking dick when I want to.
2112 01:37:42 别给我来这一套！Don't you ever pull that shit with me!
2113 01:37:43 我知道你周围男人可多了！I know you get tons of dick!
2114 01:37:45 就今晚没有最近没有而已 嗯哼Just not tonight and not recently. Mmm-hmm.
2115 01:37:48 我女儿在哪 莫拉?Where's my daughter, Maura?
2116 01:37:50 你知道吗？Do you know?
2117 01:37:53 不知道No.
2118 01:37:54 看着我的眼睛Look me in the eyes.
2119 01:37:58 我不知道她在哪I don't know where she is.
2120 01:38:00 你一直不会撒谎You've always been a fucking terrible liar.
2121 01:38:03 我女儿在哪莫拉？Where is my daughter, Maura?
2122 01:38:05 她一直和我住在亚特兰大She has been staying with me in Atlanta.
2123 01:38:07 从多久开始的？Since when?
2124 01:38:09 6月June.
2125 01:38:11 6月June.
2126 01:38:13 你眼睁睁看着我像个白痴一样为她担心You watched me worry about her like an idiot,
2127 01:38:17 天天给她发短信fucking texting her every day,
2128 01:38:18 天天担心得要死and freaking out about her every day.
2129 01:38:20 而她这段时间都和你住一起？And she was living with you the whole time?
2130 01:38:22 俚是重点是 她不想让你知道Okay, but the thing is, she didn't want you to know.
2131 01:38:24 你是我妹妹 你该告诉我她很安全的！You're my sister! You should have told me she was safe!
2132 01:38:27 她本来就很安全重点是海莉需要…She is. She was! The thing is, Haley needs...
2133 01:38:31 别来给我说我自己女儿需要什么懂吗？Don't tell me what my daughter needs, Okay?
2134 01:38:34 你咋不开车去Why don't you drive yourself to
2135 01:38:35 宠物超市买个老公回家啊？fucking Petco and find a fucking husband?
2136 01:38:37 或者拿你那对奶子去喂松鼠去你个假女人Or go breastfeed a squirrel, you sad excuse for a woman.
2137 01:38:43 噢Oh.
2138 01:38:43 我去Oh, shit!
2139 01:38:50 这一幕让我想起了我们周年纪念日看的那部电影This reminds me of that movie we watched on our anniversary.
2140 01:38:55 嗷！嗷！Ow! Ow!
2141 01:38:57 我屁股 我屁股！My hip. My hip!
2142 01:38:58 你没事吧？没Are you okay? Yeah.
2143 01:38:59 能动吗？能Can you move it? Yeah.
2144 01:39:00 很好 我要杀了你！Good, because I'm gonna kill you!
2145 01:39:03 我真希望莫拉把她扯成两半I really hope Maura cracks her in half.
2146 01:39:05 加油 莫拉！Come on, Maura!
2147 01:39:07 你敢吐我身上Don't you spit on me.
2148 01:39:08 你干嘛打你自己？ 不好笑！Why are you hitting yourself'? Not cool!
2149 01:39:10 等下 我要拍下来Wait a second. I'm posting this shit
2150 01:39:11 上传到PoolsideBitchFights. Comstraight on PoolsideBitchFights.com.
2151 01:39:15 踢她奶子！Kick her in the tits!
2152 01:39:16 海莉是我女儿 不是你女儿！KATE: Haley is my kid, not yours!
2153 01:39:20 该死！God damn it!
2154 01:39:21 你们把我们房子怎么了？What have you done to our house?
2155 01:39:22 别摔跤了！Stop that mud wrestling now!
2156 01:39:25 妈妈 别打莫拉阿姨了Mom, leave Aunt Maura alone.
2157 01:39:26 我和她住一起住得好好的I was doing just fine living with her.
2158 01:39:28 你问外公外婆就知道I mean, ask Gram and Gramps.
2159 01:39:29 你俩一直都知道海莉和莫拉住在一起？You guys knew all along that she was living with Maura?
2160 01:39:32 你们两个老骗子！You lying mofos!
2161 01:39:34 我要杀了你I'm gonna kill you.
2162 01:39:36 停手 停手 我们受够了Stop it. Stop it! We are fed up.
2163 01:39:38 没精力看你俩打架We have no energy for this goddamn shit.
2164 01:39:40 闻我的汗臭吧 停下！Smell that armpit. DEANNA: Stop!
2165 01:39:42 我们的房子就像庞培末日一样 你俩还在这摔跤Our whole house looks like Pompeii, and you two are wrestling?
2166 01:39:44 这样吧I'll tell you what.
2167 01:39:45 既然大家都敞开天窗说亮话了Since we're all finally telling the goddamn truth,
2168 01:39:48 这里是我们的真话here's our truth.
2169 01:39:50 而这是我们打心底里认真说的And we mean this from the bottom of our hearts.
2170 01:39:53 我们已经被你俩折磨得太累了We are so tired of the both of you.
2171 01:39:56 我们确实太累了We're so tired. We really are.
2172 01:39:59 人们总是对我们说…You know, everybody always said to us...
2173 01:40:01 ”趁你女儿们还年轻尽量珍惜 要不然转眼间就长大了”"Enjoy your kids while they're young because it goes so fast."
2174 01:40:05 我完全搞不懂他们什么鬼意思I don't know what the fuck they were talking about,
2175 01:40:08 因为感觉父母工作永远也做不完because it seems like we'll never be done.
2176 01:40:10 我们一直想把指挥权交给你们We keep trying to pass you the baton.
2177 01:40:13 你们却木接受You won't take it.
2178 01:40:15 那去吧！Take it!
2179 01:40:16 把指挥权拿去！Just take the fucking baton!
2180 01:40:20 我同意 我们大家都觉得你该当一家之主 凯特I agree. We all think you should take the baton, Kate.
2181 01:40:23 莫拉 别装傻 我们也指你Maura, cut the shit. We're talking to you, too.
2182 01:40:25 我？ 对你Me? Yeah, you.
2183 01:40:27 去过你自己的生活Go and live your life
2184 01:40:29 别再跟着我们了 搞得像我们随时会死一样and stop following us around like we're gonna die any minute.
2185 01:40:32 对 我们嘿咻的次数Yeah, we probably have more sex
2186 01:40:34 可能比你俩都多 没错than the both of you. Yeah.
2187 01:40:35 我们知道！ 我们打断了你们的大白天嘿咻We know! Yeah. We interrupted one of your day-bangs.
2188 01:40:37 老天啊！Oh, my God!
2189 01:40:39 知道吗 如果我们必须是一家人You know, if it takes a village...
2190 01:40:40 那我想换个家庭 因为这个家庭太糟糕了！I want a different village, because this one sucks!
2191 01:40:43 你们为何就不能…Why can't you guys just be...
2192 01:40:49 海莉 海莉！Haley! DEANNA: Haley!
2193 01:40:50 老天啊 我去！MAURA: Oh, God. DAVE: Oh, shit!
2194 01:40:52 老天啊！ 海莉！Oh, sweet Jesus! MAURA: Haley!
2195 01:40:54 海莉c? 妈妈！Haley? HALEY: Mom!
2196 01:40:55 巴基快帮忙啊！ 海莉！Bucky, do something! Haley!
2197 01:40:56 海莉！Haley!
2198 01:40:59 我去凯特！DAVE: Oh, shit! Kate!
2199 01:41:02 这派对简直太疯了PAZUZU: This party is unbelievable.
2200 01:41:03 我明天不去上班了 美国运输安全管理局去死吧I am not going in to work tomorrow. TSA can kiss my ass.
2201 01:41:07 凯特 我之前公寓塌陷的时候也遇到过这种情况Kate, I've been through this shit before when my condo sankholed.
2202 01:41:11 我告诉你该怎么做I'm gonna talk you through it.
2203 01:41:13 你的直觉会告诉你Your first instinct is gonna be
2204 01:41:15 先好好睡一觉 明早在解决这个烂摊子just to go to sleep and deal with it in the morning,
2205 01:41:17 但别这么做but don't do that
2206 01:41:18 我这有梯子凯特！I got a ladder. Kate!
2207 01:41:19 水冰吗？ 冰死了！Is it cold? KATE: Yes, it's fucking cold!
2208 01:41:20 快去 感觉挺冰的Hush! It looks cold.
2209 01:41:22 大家都被这场紧急事故吸引了注意力Everyone's distracted by the emergency right now.
2210 01:41:24 我想好好体验一下快乐的感觉I wanna be balls deep in joy.
2211 01:41:27 那就如此吧Then be in it.
2212 01:41:29 靠过来Back into me.
2213 01:41:31 正在向你靠拢Backing into you.
2214 01:41:37 我进去了夹紧I'm in. Lock it up.
2215 01:41:39 好的抓紧你了 我们这有梯子Okay, I got you. BUCKY: We got the ladder.
2216 01:41:41 凯特 爬上梯子来Kate! Come on up the ladder.
2217 01:41:42 大家同心协力We can do this together, all right?
2218 01:41:44 大家都先安静一下Everyone say a non-denominational
2219 01:41:46 各自为他们祷告silent prayer to themselves, please.
2220 01:41:49 海莉别害怕我们上去Haley, don't be scared. Here we go.
2221 01:41:50 好高啊 加油你们能做到的！That's really high. MAURA: Come on, you can do it!
2222 01:41:52 太陡峭了我会摔下去的 这是唯一的出路HALEY: It's too steep. I'm gonna fall. KATE: It's the only way out.
2223 01:41:54 看吧外公就在那 你不会摔下去的宝贝Look, there's Gramps. Oh, you're not gonna slip, honey.
2224 01:41:56 加油 我做不到我做不到Come on. I can't, I can't.
2225 01:41:57 我们得去帮她们We need to get in there and help them.
2226 01:41:59 钩环都给我！I need all your carabiners!
2227 01:42:01 没问题I'm all over it.
2228 01:42:02 海莉 这个洞可能还会继续下沉KATE: Hales' this could keep sinking.
2229 01:42:04 你要我和你一起爬吗？Do you want me to climb with you?
2230 01:42:05 什么？What?
2231 01:42:06 我和你一起爬 好吗？I'll climb with you, okay?
2232 01:42:07 我就在你旁边和你一起爬I'm gonna climb right here, next to you.
2233 01:42:11 凯特 加油啊！MAURA: Kate, you can do it!
2234 01:42:13 妈妈以前在派对上经常这么做Mommy used to do this at parties,
2235 01:42:15 因为她是个白痴because she was a fucking idiot.
2236 01:42:16 加油啊 加油Come on. Come on. Come on, now.
2237 01:42:18 大家一起来！Everybody!
2238 01:42:20 别往下看你会爬出去的 凯特！凯特！Don't look down. You got it. ALL: Kate! Kate! Kate!
2239 01:42:21 好的加油Okay. Come on.
2240 01:42:23 就这样There we go.
2241 01:42:24 加油啊 孩子Yep. Yep. Come on, girl.
2242 01:42:26 快到了 海莉加油！You got it. Haley. Come on!
2243 01:42:27 你马上到了You're almost there.
2244 01:42:28 加油我拉你！ 妈妈？Come on. I got it! Mom?
2245 01:42:30 妈妈在这！ 加油I'm the mom! Come on.
2246 01:42:35 太好了！All right!
2247 01:42:42 现在 所有人赶紧滚蛋Now, everybody get the hell
2248 01:42:44 要不然我打电话给你们小孩！out of here, before I call your children!
2249 01:42:50 你跳进了塌陷的泳池You jumped into a sinkhole
2250 01:42:53 还徒手攀岩来救我and climbed a rock wall to save me.
2251 01:42:55 嗯 这叫母亲的力量 我刚才直接变成支浩克了Yeah, it's called Mom strength. I basically She-Hulked.
2252 01:42:59 你是我孩子You're my kid.
2253 01:43:00 这是我唯一不会辞职的工作It's the only job I'll never quit.
2254 01:43:06 你刚才闻我头？Did you smell my head?
2255 01:43:07 嗯 味道真香Yeah, smells good.
2256 01:43:09 你真是个怪人You're such a weirdo.
2257 01:43:10 小心 要不然我拿车砸你Remember, I can throw a car at you.
2258 01:43:21 或许到白天之后看上去会好些Maybe it'll look better in the daylight?
2259 01:43:27 怎么是蓝色的？Why is it blue?
2260 01:43:30 好吧 我们完全操蛋了Well, we are totally fucked.
2261 01:43:32 老天 妈 别说”操蛋”Oh, my God, Mom, don't say "fucked."
2262 01:43:34 从你嘴里说出来总感觉怪怪的It sounds so wrong coming out of your mouth.
2263 01:43:36 噢 真他妈遗憾啊Oh, too fucking bad.
2264 01:43:39 我现在气坏了I'm pissed.
2265 01:43:41 我想说啥就说啥And I'll say whatever I wanna say
2266 01:43:43 因为我对你”康挺”失望透了！because I am cuntingly disappointed in you!
2267 01:43:46 哇 够了Wow. All right.
2268 01:43:48 这单词根本不存在吧 别学你姐那样和我顶嘴That's not even a word. Don't you dare sass me like your sister.
2269 01:43:51 我们回家了BUCKY: We are going home
2270 01:43:53 而你明早6点得起床把这烂摊子收拾干净and your asses are getting up at 6:00 a-m. To clean up.
2271 01:43:57 啥？ 还有穿点内力And put some underwear on! What?
2272 01:43:59 你这是什么情况呢？简直是不知羞耻！What are you doing? I mean, it's just shameful!
2273 01:44:02 老天 你俩冷静点God, you guys need to chill out.
2274 01:44:03 老天啊！Oh, God!
2275 01:44:06 老天啊！Oh, God!
2276 01:44:07 冷静点 老妈！KATE: Calm down, Mom!
2277 01:44:09 滚蛋！Fuck Off!
2278 01:44:22 亲爱的日记 今晚我们的派对变成了泡沫狂欢Dear diary, tonight we had a party that fumed into a foam orgy.
2279 01:44:27 我和一个又帅人又好还喜欢我的男生亲热了I made out with a sweet, hot, funny guy who really liked me
2280 01:44:31 结果他菊花直接摔到了音乐盒上until he fell down butthole-first on a ballerina.
2281 01:44:36 真是个刺激的夜晚啊What a night.
2282 01:44:38 起床了！Asses up!
2283 01:44:40 立刻！Now!
2284 01:45:07 老天啊！on, God!
2285 01:45:09 这是谁？Who's that?
2286 01:45:11 喔！这里发生什么事了？Whoa! What happened here?
2287 01:45:13 噢Oh.
2288 01:45:15 嗨 埃利斯一家Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Ellis.
2289 01:45:16 你俩气色真好You look great.
2290 01:45:21 你们看到我的助听器了么？You find my hearing aid?
2291 01:45:24 你落哪了？Where did you leave it?
2292 01:45:26 她听不到你She can't hear you.
2293 01:45:28 昨晚那哗哗声弄得我要发疯了 就叫她取下来了She had to take them out because the beeping was freaking me out
2294 01:45:30 磕了药你懂的when I was on drugs.
2295 01:45:37 你们说啥？What?
2296 01:45:38 没人在说话Nobody's lips are moving.
2297 01:45:39 好的 我好像把我的信用卡全吞肚子里去了Okay. I'm pretty sure I swallowed all my credit cards,
2298 01:45:42 我现在要去拉出来了so I'm gonna go deal with that.
2299 01:45:44 走吧 亲爱的Come on, my love.
2300 01:45:46 生日快乐！Happy Birthday!
2301 01:45:54 女儿们还小的时候When the girls were little,
2302 01:45:55 我经常拿喷头给她们洗头I used to wash their hair with this sprayer.
2303 01:45:57 如果你想的话 我可以把这喷头下到公寓去I could put this one in the condo, if you like.
2304 01:46:01 不了No.
2305 01:46:04 就放在回忆里吧I'll remember it.
2306 01:46:14 帮我绕绕背?Scratch my back?
2307 01:46:23 那?-嗯嗯There'? DEANNA: Mmm-hmm. Mmm.
2308 01:46:25 嗯哼？Mmm-hmm'?
2309 01:46:30 听着 老爸Listen, Dad...
2310 01:46:31 我把这座房买T来 凯特和海莉就能住在这了I'll buy the house as is and Kate and Haley can stay here.
2311 01:46:35 不行No, you won't.
2312 01:46:36 让我弥补下吧 你已经做得够多了Let me fix things. You've done enough.
2313 01:46:38 你不是要赶飞机吗？Don't you have a plane to catch?
2314 01:46:40 你多久才能学会 我们并不是何时都需要你帮助的BUCKY: When are you gonna learn that your help isn't always wanted?
2315 01:46:45 虽然我钱没有莫拉多KATE: I can't offer as much as Maura can,
2316 01:46:47 但我还是有一点的but I do have some money.
2317 01:46:49 拜托 我和海莉能暂时住在这里吗？Can I please live in your house, temporarily, with Haley,
2318 01:46:54 会修好的and fix it up?
2319 01:46:56 你们没必要立刻做决定 不行Don't have to answer right away... No.
2320 01:46:58 拜托了 你快回家去吧Please, just go home.
2321 01:47:01 我没有家了I have no more home.
2322 01:47:09 居然打出外孙女这张牌了Oh, pulling out the granddaughter card.
2323 01:47:12 该死God damn it.
2324 01:47:15 好吧 我给你2周时间来修好All right, I'll give you two weeks to fix it up
2325 01:47:18 然后我就一把火烧掉去叫保险公司赔and then I'm torching it for insurance.
2326 01:47:21 好的Okay.
2327 01:47:22 这里是我所有的钱That's everything I have.
2328 01:47:26 够你修理的钱吗？Can you fix the damage for that?
2329 01:47:28 不够No.
2330 01:47:30 但是我可以帮你一起修But I'll help you do it.
2331 01:47:35 莫拉还在城里吗？ls Maura still in town?
2332 01:47:37 不No.
2333 01:48:03 我以为你飞回亚特兰大了I thought you flew to Atlanta.
2334 01:48:05 啊．．Uh...
2335 01:48:07 在我道歉之前我不想回去I didn't wanna leave town until I said I was sorry.
2336 01:48:17 而且我那天晚上好像把驾照And I think I melted my driver's license
2337 01:48:18 放进微波炉烧了in the microwave, the other night.
2338 01:48:22 对不起 凯特I'm sorry, Kate.
2339 01:48:23 我很抱歉之前没告诉你海莉和我住一起I'm sorry that I didn't tell you that Haley was with me.
2340 01:48:27 你愿意原谅我吗？Will you forgive me for that?
2341 01:48:30 我得要一段时间接受I'm gonna milk it for a while.
2342 01:48:32 好吧Okay.
2343 01:48:35 我给你做了点东西I made you something.
2344 01:48:37 本来打算寄给你的 但是我邮票用光了I was gonna send it to you, but I didn't have any stamps
2345 01:48:39 因为他们现在都不生产邮票了because they don't make them anymore.
2346 01:48:45 ”姐妹永远都会支持对方”"Sisters are always there for each other."
2347 01:48:50 ”但有些妹妹就是认为她了不起”"But some sisters think they're hot shit,"
2348 01:48:53 ”跑去做一些蠢得不行的事”"and do super-intrusive, fucked-up things,"
2349 01:48:55 ”比如悄悄地让” ”姐姐的孩子住在她家 感觉自己更优秀”"like secretly harbor the other one's child so they can feel superior."
2350 01:48:58 名言一般都很短的Quotes are usually short.
2351 01:49:00 丁丁也是 但有时候你就是能撞大运So are dicks, but sometimes you hit the jackpot.
2352 01:49:03 继续读Keep reading.
2353 01:49:07 ”而有些姐姐的生活一团糟”"And some sisters live their lives in chaos, "
2354 01:49:09 ”就像龙卷风一样”like a goddamn tornado,
2355 01:49:11 ”所以妹妹必须老师给她擦屁股”"so the other sister has to clean it up all the time."
2356 01:49:14 ”所以她俩都错了 结束”"So, they're both wrong. The end."
2357 01:49:18 当我当”派对老妈”的时候When I was party mom,
2358 01:49:20 我意识到 要帮所有人擦屁股真烦人I realized that always having to take care of everyone's shit sucks.
2359 01:49:24 而且我觉得你乜意识到了And I'm sure you realized
2360 01:49:26 自私自利做事不顾后果也并不全是乐趣that it's not all fun being selfish and leaving a mess.
2361 01:49:29 是好玩得不行It's pretty fucking fun.
2362 01:49:35 我们得像这座房子告别 像以前的自己告别We need to say goodbye to this house and who we were here.
2363 01:49:43 詹姆斯给我说过房子只是建筑物You know, James told me that a house is a building
2364 01:49:47 但家是一种感觉but home is a feeling.
2365 01:49:50 他真聪明 你得赶紧把他搞到手He's smart. You need to lock that guy down.
2366 01:49:52 我搞砸了I blew it with him.
2367 01:49:53 没他还在打听你呢No, he's still asking about you.
2368 01:49:55 真的？ 嗯He is? Yeah.
2369 01:49:56 他人太好了He is the greatest
2370 01:49:58 詹姆斯需要…James just needs some...
2371 01:49:59 别 别再帮别人做自己的决定了No! Stop deciding what other people need.
2372 01:50:01 你需要帮助 让他帮你吧You need help. Let him help you.
2373 01:50:06 我得去清理冰箱上的”我喜欢睾丸”上的涂鸦了I got to go scrub "I heart balls" off the fridge.
2374 01:50:09 真对不起我写了那种东西I'm sorry I wrote that.
2375 01:50:10 等下 嗯Wait! Mmm.
2376 01:50:13 那我见到他之后该怎么做？What do I do when I see him?
2377 01:50:16 看吧 我这是在找你帮忙See, I'm asking for help already.
2378 01:50:19 想个方法让他主动Find a way to make him come to you.
2379 01:50:21 但是放开一点But go big-
2380 01:50:23 明确表现出你需要他Make it clear that you need him.
2381 01:50:35 救命！MAURA: Help!
2382 01:50:38 救命！Help!
2383 01:50:52 救命Help.
2384 01:50:56 我知道你以前是救生员I know you used to be a lifeguard.
2385 01:50:59 我需要帮忙I need it.
2386 01:51:04 请救救我！Save me, please!
2387 01:51:18 天呐Oh, my God.
2388 01:51:20 我溺水了I'm drowning.
2389 01:51:21 别死了Don't die.
2390 01:51:23 过来Come here.
2391 01:51:33 水灌进菊花里真疼啊Water feels good on my ballerina hole.
2392 01:51:38 那你丁丁的欲火呢？ 噢What about your dick burns'? Ooh.
2393 01:51:41 很高兴认识你欲火Nice to meet you, Dick Burns.
2394 01:52:19 你们怎么做到的啊？How in the hell did you pull this off?
2395 01:52:22 我以前做事总是只用3层功力 而这次我用了全力Well, I usually give 30% and I went for the full 100 this time.
2396 01:52:27 这面墙可能得再刷一遍You might need one more coat.
2397 01:52:30 啥？What?
2398 01:52:33 搞定了There we go.
2399 01:52:35 感谢你这么做 噢…Thanks for doing this. Oh, well...
2400 01:52:38 谢谢你让我认识了戴夫Thank you for bringing me Dave.
2401 01:52:40 他做爱真是有一套He's really quite the tender love maker.
2402 01:52:43 ”大”戴夫Big Dave.
2403 01:52:48 ”非常大”戴夫 好的Very big Dave. All right.
2404 01:52:50 大大大大Big, big, big, big, big boy.-
2405 01:52:52 好的我认为戴夫很适合你Okay. I think Dave is just what you needed.
2406 01:52:53 是得Yeah.
2407 01:52:57 呼！我腿都软得走不动了Whoo! I can barely walk.
2408 01:52:59 这样真好So, this is awesome.
2409 01:53:01 来抱抱 闺蜜Come on, girlfriend.
2410 01:53:02 戴夫有衣原体Dave has chlamydia.
2411 01:53:05 友情之上Right, friendship.
2412 01:53:16 妈妈 这男的想知道他做指甲能不能打九折Mom, this guy wants to know if he can get 10% off his manicure
2413 01:53:19 因为他只有?根手指because he only has nine fingers.
2414 01:53:21 挂掉吧 那是你外公在逗我们玩Hang up. It's your grandpa pranking us.
2415 01:53:23 装得很像外公Nice try, Gramps.
2416 01:53:25 真恶心 自己开房去！Gross! Get a room!
2417 01:53:27 你不是最喜欢了Ah, you know you love it.
2418 01:53:29 10点了！It's 10:00!
2419 01:53:30 该喝香槟了Champagne time.
2420 01:53:31 我每周都要来做JAMES: I'm gonna do this every week.
2421 01:53:32 Hae-Won你手艺太好了 谢谢杰克Hae-Won, you're incredible. Thank you, Jack.
2422 01:53:35 击掌 不要High five! No.
2423 01:53:36 抱歉 好了大家都聚过来Sorry. All right, everybody, gather up.
2424 01:53:38 我代替我和共同业主致辞On behalf of my co-owner Hae-Won and myself.
2425 01:53:42 耶 阿历克斯谢谢你Yay! Thank you, Alex,
2426 01:53:44 投资了我们的梦想for investing in our dreams.
2427 01:53:45 只是尽我的职责Just here to do my part.
2428 01:53:47 喔！头发！Whoa! Hair part!
2429 01:53:48 老天 又来了Oh, God. Here we go.
2430 01:53:50 yoinksYoinks
2431 01:53:51 真是受够了There is a lid for every pot.
2432 01:53:53 看我不打爆他的蛋I'm gonna punch him right in the dick.
2433 01:53:54 大家来吧！Let's do this!
2434 01:53:57 圣诞快乐Merry Christmas.
2435 01:53:59 海莉准备好了吗？ 我就来！Haley, you ready? HALEY: I'm coming!
2436 01:54:00 哈喽 嗨Hello! Hi.
2437 01:54:05 圣诞快乐 2个小天使Merry Christmas, my two angel.
2438 01:54:08 欢迎来到你们的新家！And welcome to your new home!
2439 01:54:11 我们去选房间吧！Come on, let's go pick a room!
2440 01:54:14 真的？Really?
2441 01:54:15 说谎的No, wheelie.
2442 01:54:18 如果味道和我们以前的圣诞节不一样 我就掀桌干人If this doesn't smell like our Christmas, I will flip a table.
2443 01:54:23 嗨！DEANNA: Hi!
2444 01:54:24 噢 嗨！Oh, hi!
2445 01:54:26 大家好！ 快来抱个BUCKY: All right, hi! DEANNA: Oh, come here.
2446 01:54:28 瞧瞧你啊 瞧瞧你才对DEANNA: Look at you. JAMES: No, look at you. Look at you.
2447 01:54:31 饼干！DEANNA: Cookies!
2448 01:54:33 真漂亮啊！快瞧瞧！ 是商店里买的Oh, how beautiful! Look at these! JAMES: They're store-bought.
2449 01:54:36 很高兴见到你Good to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you.
2450 01:54:38 是你自己做的吗？ 不是Did you make these? No.
2451 01:54:39 我在加油站买的No, I bought them at a gas station.
2452 01:54:42 感觉还是挺像我们的圣诞节的Still feels like our Christmas.
2453 01:54:44 嗯Yeah.
2454 01:54:45 因为我们就是家Because we're the home.
2455 01:54:50 嗯Yeah.
2456 01:54:52 过来吧 老妹Come here, bootch.
2457 01:55:01 我来领舞我是姐姐 好Okay. Let me lead, I'm the big sister.
2458 01:55:51 什么人会…操What kind of... Fuck.
2459 01:55:54 抱歉忘词了！ 没事Sorry. Bloopers! MAN: Yeah.
2460 01:55:56 ~呼！一嘿我让DJ专门留了一曲Whoo! Hey, I put in a special request for our Applebutt...
2461 01:55:59 嘿我操抱歉操抱歉Hey, I Fuck me, sorry. Fuck, sorry.
2462 01:56:02 能重来么？ 埃利斯我… 一当然Can I try it again? Ellis I... Sure.
2463 01:56:03 我们从来一遍 抱歉MAN: Let's try again. Sorry.
2464 01:56:04 噢估计你都记不得了Oh, you probably don't remember.
2465 01:56:06 我当然记得了Oh, I remember.
2466 01:56:08 我当然记得了 忘词了Oh, I remember. I don't remember.
2467 01:56:11 我的安全语是”道琼斯工业平均指数”My safe word is "Dow Jones Industrial Average."
2468 01:56:14 我的安全语是”地理政治学灾难”My safe word is "geopolitical disaster."
2469 01:56:16 我的安全语是”Pseudoparathyroidism”（什么鬼…）My safe word is "pseudoparathyroidism."
2470 01:56:18 那女孩是毒药That girl is poison
2471 01:56:23 她很危险She's dangerous
2472 01:56:25 (LAUGHS)
2473 01:56:26 我已经受不了那只会舔屑的婊子了I am done wasting words on that cum-guzzling road whore.
2474 01:56:30 哇塞Wow.
2475 01:56:40 哈？ 哈？Huh? Huh?
2476 01:56:42 抱歉Sorry.
2477 01:56:45 真不敢相信你这么久了I can't believe that you haven't farted
2478 01:56:46 还没放屁this whole time.
2479 01:56:48 干得好 我放你脑袋里去吧 抱歉Good job. Now I put it in your head, sorry.
2480 01:56:51 音乐盒没响No, they've been silent.
2481 01:56:52 好的 再来一遍MAN: Okay, here we go.
2482 01:56:54 Hae-Won 我发音对吗？Has-Won. Am I saying it correctly?
2483 01:56:57 HaeWonHae-Won.
2484 01:56:58 我直说吧 Hae-WonI'm just gonna throw it away. Hae-Won.
2485 01:57:00 不对No.
2486 01:57:04 Hae_Hae...
2487 01:57:07 等下我会了Wait, I've got it.
2488 01:57:08 HaeWonHae-Won.
2489 01:57:14 Hae-WonHae-Won.
2490 01:57:20 抱歉Sorry.
2491 01:57:22 真抱歉I'm sorry.
2492 01:57:27 我看看发音正不正确Let me just see if I'm pronouncing it correctly.
2493 01:57:31 抱歉Sorry.
2494 01:57:32 Hae-WonHae-Won.
2495 01:57:39 卡And cut.
2496 01:57:49 更多原创外挂字幕下载 请登陆第三楼字幕网www.disanlou.org