我的老屁友 My Old Ass(2024)(EN)Subtitles
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1 00:00:43 - [water burbling]- [boat engine humming]
2 00:00:44 [Ro laughing loudly in distance]
3 00:00:46 [Ruthie] Oh, no!
4 00:00:48 [Elliott] Ruthie, you're fine.I'm not even driving that fast.
5 00:00:51 [Ro] It's your birthday, bitch!It's her birthday!
6 00:00:55 You're legal now.Now you got legal butt cheeks.
7 00:00:57 [Ruthie] Oh, my God.You can't say shit like that, Ro.
8 00:01:00 [Ro] Oh, now we gotta stop hereso you can get with some,
9 00:01:02 - like, random girl, but whatever.- [Ruthie] Yeah.
10 00:01:05 [Elliott] She's not some random girl.
11 00:01:07 We've been, like, flirting with each othersince fucking grade eight.
12 00:01:09 I gotta at least shoot my shotbefore I leave.
13 00:01:11 [Ro] Hmm, if this works, you've officiallygotten every girl in town.
14 00:01:14 - Every single girl.- [Ruthie] That's true.
15 00:01:15 [laughing] That's not true.That's not true.
16 00:01:17 - [Ro] Oh, shit!- [Ruthie shouting]
17 00:01:20 - [Ro] Holy shit.- I'm so sorry.
18 00:01:21 - [Ruthie] Are you okay?- [Ro] Is my neck still there?
19 00:01:23 [Ruthie] No, you're good,you're good, you're good.
20 00:01:24 I'm gonna be honest and I'm gonna tell herI'm leaving in three weeks.
21 00:01:27 If that leads to us banging...
22 00:01:30 ...that must have been God's plan.
23 00:01:31 That's out of my hands,you know what I mean?
24 00:01:33 - [all] Oh!- You gotta slow down. You gotta slow down.
25 00:01:35 [Ro] Bro.
26 00:01:36 [Elliott] I'm sorry, I'm like,I'm so used to driving boats
27 00:01:38 that drive like this,not this twisty wrist shit.
28 00:01:40 [Ruthie] Maybe you should actually, like,get your boating license.
29 00:01:41 I've been operating heavy machinerysince I was eight, Ruthie.
30 00:01:44 - [Ro] Are you sure... Oh!- Oh, shit, sorry.
31 00:01:46 - [Ro] You know...- [engine stops]
32 00:01:48 - ...it's an idea.- [Elliott] Help me pull it in. Pull it in.
33 00:01:50 [straining] I don't think boating licensesare, like, a real thing.
34 00:01:52 It's like a formality.
35 00:01:54 - [Ro] You guys got it? Okay.- [Elliott] Yeah.
36 00:01:56 Okay, grab that rope at the end.
37 00:01:58 [Ruthie] Oh, my gosh.
38 00:01:59 [Ro] Life and fucking death experienceright there.
39 00:02:01 - Christ.- [Elliott] Okay. [sighs]
40 00:02:04 - Made it.- [Elliott] It's go time.
41 00:02:06 You're alive. You got this.
42 00:02:07 - [Ruthie] Have fun in there.- [Elliott] Thank you.
43 00:02:09 [Ro] You be safe, kid. Wrap it up.
44 00:02:12 [Ruthie groans quietly]
45 00:02:13 - [Ro] Oh, bitch, my back is thrown.- Oh, my God.
46 00:02:15 [Ruthie] I know. Like, my neck.
47 00:02:17 They're, like,they're a medical marvel, right?
48 00:02:19 - That's true.- They, like, cure our UTIs.
49 00:02:21 - That is true.- Right? We need them.
50 00:02:22 - Yeah, you're welcome.- They fight for us,
51 00:02:24 [Elliott laughs]
52 00:02:25 So...
53 00:02:27 You said you're leaving townreally soon, right?
54 00:02:30 - Twenty-two days.- Okay, shit! It's like that?
55 00:02:32 You have to do a countdown?You're just so in a rush?
56 00:02:34 Oh, yeah. [chuckles] I mean...
57 00:02:37 There is one thingI'll really miss about this place.
58 00:02:39 [♪ Leith Ross: "(You) On My Arm"playing quietly]
59 00:02:41 [Chelsea clears throat]
60 00:02:44 - [breathy exhale]- [chuckling]
61 00:02:46 [laughing]
62 00:02:50 ♪ I wanna be, I wanna buy you ♪
63 00:02:55 ♪ Pretty little things ♪
64 00:02:57 ♪ And never ever lie ♪
65 00:02:59 [birds chirping]
66 00:03:05 Her hair is starting to melt.
67 00:03:07 It's going to ruin the surprise.
68 00:03:09 [older boy] That looks like a sheep.
69 00:03:11 Took me an hour.
70 00:03:16 She'll be here soon.
71 00:03:20 [Ro] No, so listen:
72 00:03:21 I had a uncle,'cause my aunt married this guy
73 00:03:23 but then they got divorced,but he had a guinea pig.
74 00:03:25 The PetSmart that he bought it from,
75 00:03:27 he had-- she had a kid,and the kid gave me the drugs.
76 00:03:31 Uh, so, a literal stranger.
77 00:03:34 No, I just told you...
78 00:03:35 No, listen, he said thatthey're super rare
79 00:03:37 and that they're from South America.
80 00:03:40 Africa.
81 00:03:41 Do you just chew them?
82 00:03:42 I'll-I'll look it up.
83 00:03:43 Yeah, yeah. These South America?
84 00:03:45 How do you spell "hallucinogenic"?
85 00:03:48 That's Africa.
86 00:03:49 I-I don't know. "Mushrooms."
87 00:03:51 Um, I think you, like, chew themor, like, maybe,
88 00:03:53 I heard you can make, like, some typeof herbal tea with them or some shit.
89 00:03:56 - Finally!- [Ruthie sighs]
90 00:03:58 No, we're not making tea with them.
91 00:03:59 I heard if you make tea with them,you can't control how high you get.
92 00:04:01 - Look at you.- [phone buzzing]
93 00:04:02 - [Ruthie] What were you doing?- [Elliott groans in frustration]
94 00:04:04 - Not now, Mom!- Kathy, we're very busy, huh!
95 00:04:06 - [Elliott] I'm trying to do drugs, Mom!- [Ro laughs]
96 00:04:08 [♪ Nelly Furtado: "Say It Right"]
97 00:04:10 - I-I... Okay, wow, wow, wow. Okay.- [Ro] Oh. Oh.
98 00:04:13 - [Elliott whooping]- I mean, if you're driving like that.
99 00:04:17 ♪ In the day ♪
100 00:04:19 ♪ In the night ♪
101 00:04:21 ♪ Say it right ♪
102 00:04:23 ♪ Say it all ♪
103 00:04:25 ♪ You either got it ♪
104 00:04:27 ♪ Or you don't ♪
105 00:04:30 ♪ You either stand ♪
106 00:04:31 ♪ Or you fall ♪
107 00:04:34 ♪ Oh, you don't meannothing at all to me ♪
108 00:04:39 ♪ ♪
109 00:04:42 ♪ No, you don't meannothing at all to me ♪
110 00:04:46 [girls exclaiming, laughing]
111 00:04:50 - ♪ But you got ♪- Pull.
112 00:04:52 - ♪ What it takes to set me free ♪- [indistinct chatter]
113 00:04:56 [laughing]
114 00:04:57 Look, before we get too far into it,should we make, like, an emergency plan
115 00:05:00 in case, in case anything bad happens?
116 00:05:02 No! Nothing bad is gonna happen.
117 00:05:04 That's, like, the whole point of shrooms.
118 00:05:06 Nothing bad happens on shrooms.
119 00:05:08 What if one of us, like, gets too highand, like, says something fucked-up
120 00:05:10 and it, like, changes the fabricof our friendship forever?
121 00:05:13 ♪ And at fault ♪
122 00:05:14 ♪ From my hands I could give you ♪
123 00:05:18 ♪ Something that I made ♪
124 00:05:22 ♪ From my mouth ♪
125 00:05:25 ♪ I could sing you ♪
126 00:05:27 ♪ Another brick that I laid ♪
127 00:05:31 - ♪ From my body ♪- ♪ From my body ♪
128 00:05:33 - ♪ I could show you ♪- ♪ I could show you...
129 00:05:35 - [Ruthie] Um, ten!- [Ro] Two point five.
130 00:05:37 [Ruthie] No, not the whole bag.That-that's way too many.
131 00:05:39 [Ro] That's why you gotta getyour weight up.
132 00:05:42 To Elliott.
133 00:05:44 - You old bitch!- [laughter]
134 00:05:46 May you experience a fucking,I don't know, like,
135 00:05:48 a new level of consciousnessor some shit tonight.
136 00:05:50 - [Ruthie sighs]- Mm.
137 00:05:52 [laughing]
138 00:05:54 [song fading]
139 00:05:56 [Ro slurping]
140 00:05:58 - [scoffs] Ro.- Ro.
141 00:05:59 - [burping]- Oh, my God.
142 00:06:01 - Oh, my God!- [Ro] I thought we were...
143 00:06:03 - Don't you guys want to get there?- That's so...
144 00:06:05 - Yes, but...- All right, one, two, three.
145 00:06:08 - Let's go, let's go.- Mm.
146 00:06:09 - Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug.- I can't do it.
147 00:06:10 - Chug it, chug it, chug it, chug it,chug it, chug it, chug it, chug it.
148 00:06:13 Chug it, chug it, chug it,chug it, chug it.
149 00:06:15 - [insects chirring]- [Ruthie] Oh, I'm scared.
150 00:06:17 - [Elliott] Like, are you?- [Ro] No, actually, I'm a little--
151 00:06:20 - I'm a little scared, too.- [Ruthie sighs]
152 00:06:22 I'm weirdly not.
153 00:06:24 [twig snaps]
154 00:06:25 - [Ruthie] Oh!- [loon wailing in distance]
155 00:06:27 - What the fuck was that?- [Ro] Um...
156 00:06:29 - Okay, um...- I feel like I need to call my mom.
157 00:06:31 - Let-let... Shh. Shut up.- My mom told me.
158 00:06:32 Let's just be normal, guys,and talk about something-something normal.
159 00:06:34 - Something... Something.- Let's just talk about something normal.
160 00:06:36 Um, can you, like, talk about your hopesand dreams or something, Elliott, please?
161 00:06:39 - My hopes and dreams?- Yes.
162 00:06:41 - [Ro] Fucking yes. Hopes and dreams.- Word, word.
163 00:06:43 - I've got hopes and dreams. Okay. [laughs]- [Ro] Mm-hmm.
164 00:06:45 Well...
165 00:06:47 I-I'm... I'm just excited that my life is,like, finally about to start.
166 00:06:54 Um... I don't know.Even though the world is, like,
167 00:06:58 literally on fire and...full of uneducated racists,
168 00:07:02 I'm just, like, trying to force myselfto have hope.
169 00:07:06 And I just feel like moving to Torontoand, like, living in the city
170 00:07:10 and going to school, like,it all just feels right, you know?
171 00:07:13 Ugh, like, mad respect to my ancestors,
172 00:07:15 but I do not want to bea third-generation--
173 00:07:17 I can't be a third-generationcranberry farmer and, like,
174 00:07:21 live in a town with 300 people.
175 00:07:23 And I always feel badevery time I say that, but it's, like,
176 00:07:25 - I've got energy, I've got hype.- [Ro sighs]
177 00:07:28 Like, the world... the world is literallyour fucking oyster.
178 00:07:30 Like, we've got to live.You know what I mean?
179 00:07:32 [Ro] Yeah. [laughs, squeaks]
180 00:07:35 Holy shi...
181 00:07:36 - Oh, my God.- [Ro squeaks]
182 00:07:38 Are you tripping? Are you guys tripping?
183 00:07:41 I don't know.
184 00:07:42 I feel like grooving, man.I feel like grooving.
185 00:07:46 [Elliott] What the fuck? Ru... Ruthie?
186 00:07:49 - [Elliott gasps] Oh, my God.- [Ro] Ooh, ooh, ooh.
187 00:07:51 - [Ro laughs]- Ro!
188 00:07:52 [Ro] Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
189 00:07:54 [Elliott scoffs]
190 00:07:58 - They feel like grooving, man. Wow.- [Ro] Whoo!
191 00:08:00 [Ro] Whoo.
192 00:08:02 I don't feel anything.
193 00:08:04 - You know, it's 'cause you don'ttolerate drugs well.
194 00:08:06 - Hey, freak.- Who are you?
195 00:08:07 [gasps] Oh, my God!
196 00:08:09 This is Maude Island.
197 00:08:11 My God, I used to love this place.
198 00:08:12 Damn, it's a shame some dickhead rich guybought it all up.
199 00:08:15 That sucks.
200 00:08:18 Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. [blows]
201 00:08:20 Oh, yes. Oh, yes.
202 00:08:23 Oh, my God, I miss chemicals. Mmm.
203 00:08:26 Who the fuck... are you?
204 00:08:29 Where did you come from?
205 00:08:30 You tell me. You're the one that took abunch of mushrooms and summoned me here.
206 00:08:33 Do you work for my dad?
207 00:08:35 Did he send you here to spy on me?
208 00:08:37 [laughing] That is so somethinghe would do.
209 00:08:39 That's funny. But no.
210 00:08:42 God?
211 00:08:44 [sighs heavily]
212 00:08:46 I don't know how to say this.
213 00:08:48 [whispers] Yes.
214 00:08:51 - Elliott, come on.- [slaps knee]
215 00:08:55 Dude, I'm you.
216 00:08:58 Well, I'm... I'm 39-year-old you.
217 00:09:04 - What?- What's up? [chuckles]
218 00:09:06 What the f... What are you talking about?
219 00:09:11 You're me? Fuck off. What?
220 00:09:13 - You fuck off.- Your teeth.
221 00:09:15 - Those aren't my teeth.- So? What about my teeth? What?
222 00:09:18 There's a fucking gap in your teeth.I don't have a gap in my teeth.
223 00:09:20 Yeah, dude, fuck you. Wear your retainer.
224 00:09:22 And your hair. It's so dry and it's dark.
225 00:09:24 - Take it easy.- You have bangs.
226 00:09:27 I don't have bangs, I have no plan
227 00:09:29 - on getting bangs.- Take it easy, bitch. First of all...
228 00:09:31 And your boobs are saggy.My boobs aren't saggy.
229 00:09:33 Okay, you can't even see my boobs.
230 00:09:34 - I don't see it.- Oh, my God.
231 00:09:37 Forgot how fucking dense I was.
232 00:09:39 Let me show you something.
233 00:09:40 Um, this...
234 00:09:43 Right? Nine years old.
235 00:09:44 Falling off that tractoronto the broken fence.
236 00:09:47 Hurt like hell.
237 00:09:48 Left boob--one cup smaller than the right.
238 00:09:50 - [gasps]- And, uh, no.
239 00:09:51 It never catches up to the right,but, honestly,
240 00:09:54 you get used to it and it's okay.
241 00:09:55 Guys can't really tell. Girls can, but...
242 00:09:58 Okay, more. Um, okay.
243 00:10:00 [grunts] Okay.
244 00:10:03 - Ta-da!- [Elliott gasps]
245 00:10:04 It's our missing pinkie toe.
246 00:10:05 - [groans]- Remember?
247 00:10:07 From the tequila accidentat Ruthie's second wedding?
248 00:10:10 Oh, fuck! That has not happened yet.
249 00:10:13 Shit, I shouldn't have said that.[inhales]
250 00:10:15 Actually, I kind of miss my toe.Can I see it?
251 00:10:19 [chuckles] Holy shit.
252 00:10:21 [laughing quietly]
253 00:10:24 [laughs] Okay. I'm high.
254 00:10:25 - Yeah.- Nice!
255 00:10:28 - Okay. I'm feeling it.- [Older Elliott chuckles]
256 00:10:30 I'm having a reaction to the shrooms.
257 00:10:33 They are working.I'm... I'm hallucinating.
258 00:10:36 [laughing]
259 00:10:46 I'm actually kind of hotfor being middle-aged.
260 00:10:49 Okay, fuck you.
261 00:10:50 I'm 39 years old. That's not middle-aged.
262 00:10:52 - No, that is middle-aged.- No, it's not.
263 00:10:55 I am a very young adult.
264 00:10:57 - Really?- Yes.
265 00:10:58 - I'm kind of getting MILFy vibes.- Ooh, nobody says "MILF" anymore.
266 00:11:01 [laughs] I'm kind of gagging over it.
267 00:11:03 Nobody says "gagging over it"either, so...
268 00:11:05 Wait, oh, my God. Okay.
269 00:11:07 Tell me everything. Where do we live?Do we have kids?
270 00:11:10 Are we, like, so happy and fulfilled?
271 00:11:12 Oh, my God, that is, yeah, wow.
272 00:11:15 I forgot how simple everything seemed.
273 00:11:18 Wait, that sounds dark.Do you die? Am I dead?
274 00:11:20 Does the planet just burn up and, like,explode and we all just suffocate
275 00:11:22 - and die?- Oh, my God. Chill out.
276 00:11:24 - No, is there...- Like, no, we're alive, we're alive.
277 00:11:26 This is turning into a bad trip.I feel this is turning into a bad trip.
278 00:11:29 And I'm trying to have a good time,
279 00:11:30 but you're giving mea fucking panic attack.
280 00:11:31 - Okay, no, chill.- Just tell me something good.
281 00:11:33 Um, something good. Um...
282 00:11:35 Why are you struggling to findsomething good from the future?
283 00:11:37 Ooh. This is good.
284 00:11:38 - Okay.- You're going to be fucking psyched
285 00:11:41 - to know...- Okay, tell me.
286 00:11:43 that you are a PhD student.
287 00:11:46 - [fire crackling]- [insects chirring]
288 00:11:51 Fuck yeah.
289 00:11:53 No. What? You're joking.
290 00:11:55 But I don't want to tell you in what
291 00:11:56 because I want you to have somethingto look forward to.
292 00:11:58 - Look forward to?- Yeah.
293 00:12:00 Did you just tell me I'm in my 40sand I'm still in school?
294 00:12:03 Thirties! Thirties!
295 00:12:06 Dude, what the fuck?
296 00:12:07 Did you honestly think that you weregoing to be married
297 00:12:09 and have multiple kids and your dream jobby the time you were 40?
298 00:12:13 Oh, you did. Okay.
299 00:12:19 Wait.
300 00:12:21 I just got the best idea.
301 00:12:22 You tell me who the next Apple is,
302 00:12:25 I'll invest now,and we can get insanely rich.
303 00:12:28 - Okay, I don't think that's a good idea.- Why?
304 00:12:30 Because I don't know how this shit works.
305 00:12:32 I don't want to, like, fucking getbad karma, or, like, I don't know.
306 00:12:35 One thing happens and then the other shithappens and, like, I don't know.
307 00:12:39 What is the point of this conversationif you can't give me some, like,
308 00:12:42 solid advice and then I can justmake our life better?
309 00:12:45 All right, that's not, like, the fix.I don't, I don't think that's, like, the--
310 00:12:47 You're telling me that wouldn't fixat least a couple of your problems,
311 00:12:50 - your current problems?- I just, I don't think I--
312 00:12:51 Or is our life just so...
313 00:12:53 flawless and perfect,you don't want to change anything?
314 00:12:56 [insects chirring]
315 00:13:09 Can you avoid anyone named Chad?
316 00:13:13 What?
317 00:13:14 Who the fuck is Chad?
318 00:13:17 You have one chanceto tell your younger self
319 00:13:21 your biggest life regrets,
320 00:13:23 and you ask meto avoid someone named Chad?
321 00:13:26 - Yeah.- Are you high?
322 00:13:28 No.
323 00:13:29 - Just do it.- [phone buzzing]
324 00:13:31 This is the weirdest fucking thing.
325 00:13:35 [both] Oh, my God.
326 00:13:37 - [buzzing stops]- [gasps] Why didn't you answer?
327 00:13:40 I'm not FaceTiming Mom when I'm high.
328 00:13:43 Dude, I know Mom can be annoying,but, like, be nice to her.
329 00:13:46 [scoffs] I'm so nice to Mom!
330 00:13:49 I literally let her talk to me yesterdayabout a hummingbird for 45 minutes.
331 00:13:54 - That's cute.- It was annoying.
332 00:13:56 Honestly, you should hang out with her.
333 00:13:58 Like, hang out with her.Do stuff with her.
334 00:14:00 Oh, my God.That's who you look like! Mom!
335 00:14:03 - [groans]- That's who you look like.
336 00:14:05 You look exactly like Mom. What the fuck?
337 00:14:07 - I know. I know.- Do you get that?
338 00:14:09 Yes. All the time. Everybody says that.
339 00:14:10 - No.- Everybody.
340 00:14:12 Holy shit. That's crazy.Everyone just turns into their mothers.
341 00:14:14 Yeah, basically.
342 00:14:15 Honestly, I thought it was a bad thing,but I kind of like it now.
343 00:14:19 - Mom's cool.- It works. It works.
344 00:14:21 - Mom's cool.- It works.
345 00:14:28 [Elliott laughing quietly]
346 00:14:29 Can we hug?
347 00:14:35 - Get in here.- [Elliott chuckles]
348 00:14:39 - This is so weird.- Mm-hmm.
349 00:14:43 [insects chirring]
350 00:14:45 [Elliott] I thought I'd be happier at 40.
351 00:14:48 You are happy, and I'm not 40, asshole.
352 00:14:51 You don't look happy.
353 00:14:52 I feel like...
354 00:14:54 you're having a midlife crisis.
355 00:14:56 Well, I feel like you're high on mushroomsso you don't know shit.
356 00:15:02 True.
357 00:15:09 I have an idea.
358 00:15:11 - Can we kiss?- No.
359 00:15:12 - What? Why?- Why?
360 00:15:15 It's just a kiss.It's not, like... sexual.
361 00:15:17 - A kiss is innately sexual.- No, it's not.
362 00:15:20 Why do you want to kiss yourself?
363 00:15:22 You don't want to know what it's liketo kiss yourself?
364 00:15:24 I mean, yes, I do, but it's likeyou're younger so it's weird.
365 00:15:28 Okay, can I at least touch my old ass?
366 00:15:30 Oh, my God. You need to be locked up.
367 00:15:32 - Just a quickie. I'm not gonna, like...- Fine, do it.
368 00:15:34 - I'm not gonna, like, shove tonguein your mouth.
369 00:15:36 - Really?- Fine.
370 00:15:39 [kissing]
371 00:15:42 - Oh, my God.- What?
372 00:15:44 I just wanted to knowwhat it was like to kiss myself.
373 00:15:46 - Okay. Well, now you know.- I loved it.
374 00:15:48 - Now you know.- Wow.
375 00:15:49 That was fucking hot, and you know it.
376 00:15:51 [both giggling]
377 00:16:05 Okay, can I say one last thing?
378 00:16:08 [yawning] Oh, God.
379 00:16:10 I mean, you already told meI'm a mature student in the future,
380 00:16:13 so it literally can't get any worse.
381 00:16:15 No, I'm serious.
382 00:16:20 You are so lucky.
383 00:16:23 Life will never be the sameas it is right now.
384 00:16:26 Great.
385 00:16:27 You're gonna go to the cityand everything's gonna be
386 00:16:31 exciting and busy and...
387 00:16:35 You don't even go homefor Thanksgiving this year.
388 00:16:37 You stay in the city.
389 00:16:39 You should go home.
390 00:16:41 [yawning]
391 00:16:45 The only thing you can't get back is time.
392 00:16:49 When you get older,it goes by so fast, dude.
393 00:16:52 So fast. It sucks.
394 00:17:09 Elliott.
395 00:17:13 Elliott.
396 00:17:15 - Oh, my God.- Mm. What?
397 00:17:18 [sighs, scoffs]
398 00:17:22 Where's your phone?
399 00:17:25 Phone.
400 00:17:26 Titties.
401 00:17:30 Titties?
402 00:17:40 [knocking on solid object]
403 00:17:43 You weirdo.
404 00:17:44 [Elliott grunts softly]
405 00:17:51 [gentle melody plays]
406 00:17:54 [Elliott yawning]
407 00:17:57 ♪ ♪
408 00:18:01 [Ro howling]
409 00:18:03 [kisses]
410 00:18:05 [Ro whooping]
411 00:18:10 [Ruthie sighs contentedly]
412 00:18:12 [Ruthie] And then the bunny sangand it sounded like Celine Dion.
413 00:18:15 Like, so beautiful and good.
414 00:18:17 And then, like, hundreds of smallerbunnies all came out of the woods.
415 00:18:19 They spoke Mandarin, though, so, like,
416 00:18:21 I'm not sure what the lyrics meant,but they felt beautiful.
417 00:18:24 I'm so jealous you guys had good trips.
418 00:18:27 [Ro] Nah, I mean, meeting your older selfsounds lit as fuck.
419 00:18:30 [Ruthie] I feel like you don'ttolerate drugs well, Elliott.
420 00:18:32 ♪ ♪
421 00:18:39 - [Kathy] Oh! I didn't know you were here.- [music fades]
422 00:18:42 Yeah, I got back a little bit ago.
423 00:18:44 I tried to call.
424 00:18:45 We had a cake for you.
425 00:18:47 - No.- Yes.
426 00:18:50 Mom, you guys had a cake?
427 00:18:51 Yeah.
428 00:18:53 - I'm sorry. I--- No, it's okay.
429 00:18:55 I thought I told youI was leaving early with Ro.
430 00:18:58 Oh. Well, maybe you did.You know, I probably forgot.
431 00:19:02 I'm sorry.
432 00:19:03 No, don't be sorry.
433 00:19:07 Did you have fun?
434 00:19:09 Yeah.
435 00:19:11 You know, it was so cold last night.
436 00:19:13 I was wonderingif you had enough blankets.
437 00:19:15 Yeah, we were, we were fine.
438 00:19:17 Yeah? Well, at least it didn't rain.
439 00:19:18 You know, I was looking at the radar,
440 00:19:20 and it said there was15% chance of rain at 7:00,
441 00:19:22 but, you know, then it went east.
442 00:19:25 Yeah, we were good.
443 00:19:32 [necklaces clattering]
444 00:19:34 Okay, uh...
445 00:19:37 I'll leave you to it.
446 00:19:47 [phone buzzing]
447 00:19:49 [sets down necklaces]
448 00:19:53 [gentle melody playing]
449 00:19:58 [soft moans, kissing]
450 00:20:07 Mm, I've never hooked up on a boat before.
451 00:20:10 - [Elliott laughs]- [soft breaths]
452 00:20:15 - [waves lapping gently]- [giggling]
453 00:20:22 [music fades]
454 00:20:25 What are you guys doing?
455 00:20:29 Spencer!
456 00:20:30 What are you doing down hereat the ass crack of dawn?
457 00:20:32 It's 11:00.
458 00:20:34 [Elliott] It's 11:00? Shit!
459 00:20:39 [Elliott] I'm here! I'm here!
460 00:20:41 I'm sorry I'm late.
461 00:20:43 [Tom] Almost gave up on you, kiddo.
462 00:20:45 [Elliott clears throat]
463 00:20:49 [grunting]
464 00:20:53 [whimsical music playing]
465 00:21:17 ♪ ♪
466 00:21:21 [birds chirping]
467 00:21:40 ♪ ♪
468 00:21:49 [water sloshing]
469 00:21:50 - [screams]- Whoa!
470 00:21:52 What the fuck?!
471 00:21:53 - Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you.- What the fuck?
472 00:21:55 How long have you been here for?I've been here for, like, five minutes.
473 00:21:58 About five minutes, then.
474 00:22:01 What were you doing down therefor so long?
475 00:22:03 That's some weird shit.
476 00:22:05 I was just swimming around.I wasn't doing any weird stuff.
477 00:22:07 Okay, well, fuck, I'm naked,so don't come over here.
478 00:22:11 Or, like, don't go underand open your eyes or some shit.
479 00:22:14 Okay.
480 00:22:21 [whispers] Oh, my God.
481 00:22:23 Just so you know...
482 00:22:26 there's, like...zero visibility down there.
483 00:22:28 Like, I couldn't even see, like, a Subwaysandwich length in front of me, so...
484 00:22:33 You're okay.
485 00:22:36 Okay. All right.
486 00:22:45 I had such a fun first day.
487 00:22:48 I learned so much stuff about cranberries.
488 00:22:51 [blows sharply]
489 00:22:52 Did you know that a cranberryhas four pockets of air?
490 00:22:55 Wait, wait, wait.You work here, Washington?
491 00:22:57 Yeah, boy.
492 00:22:59 Tom is actually such a cool guy.
493 00:23:01 You're lucky he's your dad.
494 00:23:03 [scoffs] How did you know he's my dad?
495 00:23:06 'Cause you got the exact same face.
496 00:23:08 - [Elliott scoffs]- Except you're the girl version.
497 00:23:11 - Sick.- Same cheeks.
498 00:23:12 Thanks. I love hearing that.It's really nice.
499 00:23:15 [sniffs]
500 00:23:20 What's your real name?
501 00:23:22 Chad.
502 00:23:23 [tense music playing]
503 00:23:28 What? What did you just say?
504 00:23:29 - I said my name's Chad.- [music becomes brighter]
505 00:23:31 Is that short for anything?Chadwick? Chandler?
506 00:23:34 Uh, Charles, Chad Michael Murray?
507 00:23:36 - Nope. It's just Chad.- No? Okay.
508 00:23:38 Oh, my God. I gotta go!I gotta go! Turn around.
509 00:23:40 - S-Sorry.- Like, close your eyes or something.
510 00:23:44 [Chad] Hey, wait. What's your name?
511 00:23:45 It's, um... Ray!
512 00:23:47 Raymond Romano!
513 00:23:49 Like that guy?
514 00:23:50 ♪ ♪
515 00:24:18 [bird calling]
516 00:24:21 ♪ ♪
517 00:24:29 [exhales]
518 00:24:41 ♪ ♪
519 00:24:49 [screams]
520 00:24:56 Ooh. A bowl of rice. That's never good.
521 00:24:58 They're supposed to be waterproof.Or, well, water-resistant.
522 00:25:01 Cool, yeah, thanks, Spencer.
523 00:25:03 [rain pattering]
524 00:25:05 [thunder rumbles in distance]
525 00:25:07 [sighs heavily]
526 00:25:10 [phone line ringing]
527 00:25:16 [Older Elliott] Holy shit! This worked.
528 00:25:17 Who is this? Who the fuck is this?
529 00:25:20 I'm serious, you do not wantto fuck with me. I'm not the one.
530 00:25:22 Oh, wow, you sound so tough.Elliott, you freak, it's me.
531 00:25:25 It's me! I put my numberin your phone the other night,
532 00:25:27 but, honestly, I did not knowthis would work. This is crazy.
533 00:25:31 Wait. So, are-are you followingall of my advice
534 00:25:33 and hanging out with the family?
535 00:25:35 [gasps] Oh, have youplayed golf with Max yet?
536 00:25:37 I really think you should.
537 00:25:39 No! No, I haven't played golf with Max yet
538 00:25:42 because up until two hours agowhen I met Chad,
539 00:25:45 I thought you were just a figmentof my fucked-up mushroom brain.
540 00:25:47 So give me a fucking second...
541 00:25:50 Oh, my God, you're so dramatic.
542 00:25:52 ...to comprehend the factthat I'm on the phone with my old ass.
543 00:25:55 I thought that was funny.
544 00:25:57 I didn't let you touch it, so I felt bad.
545 00:25:59 Wait. So are you, like,at the farm right now?
546 00:26:02 It must be-- Oh, it's 6:30. Oh, my gosh.
547 00:26:05 You guys are gonna sit down for dinner.That's so sweet.
548 00:26:07 Did Dad make his salmon?
549 00:26:09 Ugh, I miss salmon so much.
550 00:26:10 Eat all of it now while it's still around.
551 00:26:12 [gasps] You know what would be so funny?
552 00:26:14 Do the fish lip thing that Mom loves.It'll make her laugh.
553 00:26:17 - Wait, is Mom dead?- What?
554 00:26:19 Are you telling me to make Mom laugh'cause she's fucking dead?
555 00:26:21 No! No, no.
556 00:26:23 We just can't do the-the fish...
557 00:26:25 What? No. She's totally alive. Chill.
558 00:26:27 Thank God. I need to die before Mom dies.
559 00:26:30 Dude, that's fucking dark.
560 00:26:31 I have to tell my therapist you said that.
561 00:26:33 - [air raid siren wailing over phone]- Oh, wait a minute. Hang on.
562 00:26:35 [shouting] Basement! Basement!
563 00:26:38 Uh, look, dude, I gotta go.I-I'll call you later.
564 00:26:40 [phone line clicks, beeps]
565 00:26:42 [sets phone on desk]
566 00:26:44 [rain pattering]
567 00:26:48 [pensive music playing]
568 00:26:52 [cutlery clinking]
569 00:26:56 [Kathy] Sweetheart,do you need anything else?
570 00:26:59 Here, yeah. Can you pass me that?
571 00:27:03 [Elliott] I can't believe this is, like...
572 00:27:04 [spits] ...real.
573 00:27:06 [Older Elliott] I know.Me either, honestly.
574 00:27:08 - [Elliott chuckles]- So weird.
575 00:27:10 Okay, what do we do now?
576 00:27:12 Uh, I don't know.
577 00:27:14 I guess you take my adviceand make our life better?
578 00:27:18 - Jesus. No pressure.- [water running]
579 00:27:20 But I don't want to tell youtoo much, okay?
580 00:27:22 I'm afraid I'll ruin, like,the surprises of life or whatever.
581 00:27:25 No, no, no, no. It's fine.We hate surprises, remember?
582 00:27:29 Yes, we hate them. Also, we have, like,no idea how this works,
583 00:27:32 so maybe you don't tell anyone about this?
584 00:27:34 Yeah, I was not planning on that.
585 00:27:35 And you won't tell our gorgeous wifeand three children either, right?
586 00:27:39 [laughing] Three children?Oh, my God, Elliott.
587 00:27:41 Nobody's allowed to havethree children anymore.
588 00:27:43 Look, just listen to me.
589 00:27:46 Don't do anything stupid,and we'll be fine.
590 00:27:48 - It's gonna work. I promise.- [Ro] Elliott.
591 00:27:49 - [Ro] Fuck! Fuck! Shit!- [Elliott] Oh, shit!
592 00:27:51 - [Ro] Whoa-ho! Shit!- [Elliott squealing]
593 00:27:54 [Elliott] Got you, got you.Okay, and if I don't kill us,
594 00:27:56 will you tell me when we haveour first threesome?
595 00:27:58 [Older Elliott] Oh, my God, dude,I wish I had the energy
596 00:28:00 - to have sex with one person,let alone two.
597 00:28:03 [Older Elliott] Go hang outwith your brothers.
598 00:28:05 - Alakazam!- Oh!
599 00:28:07 [Elliott] I don't think you rememberhow annoying they are.
600 00:28:09 Why do you even want to come?
601 00:28:11 Because I'm leaving soon,and I want us to bond.
602 00:28:18 Anything new in your life?
603 00:28:21 Not really.
604 00:28:23 [tender music playing]
605 00:28:26 Are you gonna miss me when I'm gone?
606 00:28:29 No.
607 00:28:32 - Fair.- [club strikes ball]
608 00:28:35 [ball bounces in cup]
609 00:28:36 [Elliott] Dude, there's absolutely no waythis is making our life better.
610 00:28:39 [Older Elliott, laughing] Dude,you played one game. Try harder.
611 00:28:42 - [head thunks]- [Elliott] Ow! Max!
612 00:28:44 - [door closes]- Hi.
613 00:28:46 - Hi.- Can I help you with anything?
614 00:28:47 Uh, you can take out the garbage.
615 00:28:51 [Elliott] This adviceliterally sucks dick, dude.
616 00:28:54 - [Older Elliott] Shut up.You literally suck dick.
617 00:28:57 Ray! Raymond!
618 00:28:59 [Older Elliott] Wait, wait, wait,wait, wait. Is that Chad?
619 00:29:01 - Yo, get the fuck out of there.- [Elliott] I am.
620 00:29:04 - [Older Elliott] Run!- [Elliott] I literally am.
621 00:29:05 [Older Elliott] I told youto stay away from that guy.
622 00:29:07 [Elliott] I know.
623 00:29:09 I got this. We're-we're good.
624 00:29:10 You're stressing over nothing.
625 00:29:13 I'm not gonna fuck this up.
626 00:29:16 [quietly] Oh, fuck.
627 00:29:31 [burbling scream]
628 00:29:32 [screaming]
629 00:29:34 [Chad] What's going on?
630 00:29:36 I saw one of those motherfuckingevil snakes! I swear to God!
631 00:29:39 - What did it look like?- It was, it was brown and it was, like,
632 00:29:41 this big and it fucking looked right at meand laughed!
633 00:29:43 I'll be right back.
634 00:29:45 [deep breaths]
635 00:29:51 [yelping and shouting]
636 00:29:54 - [yelping, shouting continue]- [Elliott laughing]
637 00:29:58 Look, I got him!
638 00:29:59 [Elliott laughing]
639 00:30:01 I got him.
640 00:30:02 He put up a good fight, but in the end,
641 00:30:05 I was stronger, smarterand faster than him.
642 00:30:10 [Chad snarling]
643 00:30:12 Something is wrong with you.
644 00:30:19 [Elliott laughing]
645 00:30:23 How much horsepower does your boat have?
646 00:30:25 How do you know I have a boat?
647 00:30:27 Because I saw you driving it.
648 00:30:29 - Okay, Peeping Tom.- I wasn't Peeping Tom-ing.
649 00:30:32 I was just looking out at the open water.
650 00:30:38 Will you take me for a ride sometime?
651 00:30:40 [Elliott scoffs]
652 00:30:41 No!
653 00:30:43 No, I'm not going to take you for a ride.
654 00:30:45 I barely know you.
655 00:30:47 You could be, and you most likely are,a fucking murderer.
656 00:30:49 I'm not a murderer. I promise.
657 00:30:53 - You, I-- You are a murderer. I'm, like--- [both laughing]
658 00:30:55 I won't murder you.
659 00:30:57 How 'bout that?
660 00:31:03 Plus, it's, like...it's a tiny bit broken right now anyways.
661 00:31:07 What happened?
662 00:31:08 I have no idea. I went down earlierand it just didn't start.
663 00:31:11 Maybe I can fix?
664 00:31:15 What are you, a mechanic murderer now?
665 00:31:17 No.
666 00:31:19 But I worked at my dad's mechanic shopmy whole life.
667 00:31:24 Oh.
668 00:31:29 Are you bonded and insured?
669 00:31:31 Just let me fix the damn boat, Romano!
670 00:31:35 Can you hand me those pliers?
671 00:31:39 Are you gonna take over the farm one day?
672 00:31:42 [Elliott sighs]
673 00:31:44 I have zero... zero desire to be a farmer.
674 00:31:47 Plus, my brother wants to do it,so I'm just, like, "Cool, you do it."
675 00:31:51 My middle brother.
676 00:31:53 My younger brotherjust wants to move to Ireland
677 00:31:55 and marry this famous actresswhose name I can never say right.
678 00:31:57 Saoirse Ronan, right?
679 00:32:00 [laughing] Why do you know that?
680 00:32:01 Oh, 'cause I love her, man.Have you seen Little Women?
681 00:32:03 Yeah. A hundred times.
682 00:32:05 So, if you weren't a farmer,what would you be doing?
683 00:32:11 [exhales] I don't know.Not totally sure yet.
684 00:32:18 What was that?
685 00:32:20 I just thought that if you didn't wantto take over your family legacy,
686 00:32:23 then maybe you'd havesome sort of big aspiration.
687 00:32:25 You know, like, saving the planet or...becoming prime minister or something.
688 00:32:31 Well, I can't speak French, Chad,
689 00:32:32 so my dreams of becoming prime ministerhave sadly been put to bed.
690 00:32:35 Like, what the fuck?
691 00:32:37 [Chad clears throat]
692 00:32:38 (IN FRENCH) J'ai réparé votre bateau.
693 00:32:42 Le conduit de carburant était laîche.
694 00:32:44 De rien.
695 00:32:46 [quiet music playing]
696 00:32:52 On peut faire un petit tour?
697 00:32:56 [phone buzzing]
698 00:32:58 [sighs heavily]
699 00:33:02 Okay, I'm never going on a boat ridewith you, okay?
700 00:33:06 You can speak French.
701 00:33:08 Yeah, well...
702 00:33:09 I'm smarter than I look, Chad.
703 00:33:13 I think you look smart.
704 00:33:14 [frustrated grunt] Stop being so nice!
705 00:33:16 Okay!
706 00:33:18 Fucker!
707 00:33:20 No!
708 00:33:28 ♪ ♪
709 00:33:33 [Elliott] Okay, can youjust tell me, like,
710 00:33:35 what does this Chad guy do, again?
711 00:33:37 'Cause, honestly, he seems so harmless.
712 00:33:40 Like, I've never been less threatenedby anyone, I don't think.
713 00:33:45 [Older Elliott] Oh, God. What happened?
714 00:33:47 - Nothing. Nothing happened.- Tell me.
715 00:33:49 He was acting all niceand he fixed the boat and--
716 00:33:52 You let him fix the boat? No.
717 00:33:53 He basically made me let him.
718 00:33:56 - [Older Elliott groaning]- Okay?
719 00:33:59 Don't you remember that?
720 00:34:01 [Older Elliott sighs]
721 00:34:02 Yeah, I do.
722 00:34:04 He's like...
723 00:34:06 [sighs]
724 00:34:08 He's like this weird mixof being so lovable...
725 00:34:10 - Oh, my God.- ...that I just want to protect him,
726 00:34:12 - and then being so basicI want to punch him...
727 00:34:15 ...in his weirdly symmetrical face.
728 00:34:17 Elliott, do not have sex with him.
729 00:34:20 Jesus! I'm not gonna...
730 00:34:23 I can admit someone's face is symmetricaland not fuck them.
731 00:34:26 [Older Elliott sighs]
732 00:34:27 - God.- God.
733 00:34:32 Hello?
734 00:34:33 [sighs] No more boat rides with Chad.
735 00:34:36 Promise?
736 00:34:38 Dude, are you okay?
737 00:34:41 You should get some sleep. It's late.
738 00:34:43 [phone line clicks, beeps]
739 00:34:48 [Elliott] Have you ever, like,off-roaded with this thing?
740 00:34:50 Just, like, like, monster truck style?
741 00:34:51 - [Max] No.- [Elliott] I would.
742 00:34:54 [Max] Sorry I'm not cool like you.
743 00:34:56 [Elliott] Hey, you're cool.
744 00:34:58 [Max] Mom and Dad tell youto say that, too?
745 00:34:59 [Elliott] What does that mean?
746 00:35:01 I know they asked you to hang out with me.
747 00:35:03 Otherwise, you'd never be seen with me.
748 00:35:05 You're an idiot.They didn't ask me to hang out with you.
749 00:35:12 Do you actually think I wouldn't wantto be seen with you?
750 00:35:15 I mean... yeah.
751 00:35:17 Why?
752 00:35:19 [laughs] 'Cause I'm everythingthat annoys you:
753 00:35:22 I like farming, I play sports,I hate Euphoria.
754 00:35:28 On my last birthday card, you wrote,"I'd wish you a happy birthday,
755 00:35:31 but cis white mendon't need any more happiness."
756 00:35:34 [Elliott laughs]
757 00:35:35 That was a joke.
758 00:35:38 It was!
759 00:35:40 Okay, sorry. I should have written,
760 00:35:42 "The gender binary is killing us all.I hope you don't outlive the planet."
761 00:35:48 [birds chirping]
762 00:35:56 I'm sorry.
763 00:35:59 I'm sorry. I know I've been, like...
764 00:36:03 ...like, narrow-minded about some stuff,and that's fucked-up.
765 00:36:06 So, I'm sorry.
766 00:36:07 And I genuinely think you're, like...
767 00:36:10 the realest, like... good person vibes.
768 00:36:18 And I'm not embarrassedto be seen with you.
769 00:36:19 I thought you were embarrassedto be seen with me.
770 00:36:22 Oh, I am.
771 00:36:24 - [both chuckling]- [tender music playing]
772 00:36:26 Didn't realizeit was such a precise sport.
773 00:36:29 - This is why I say that the formis important, all right?
774 00:36:31 'Cause you're not...You don't have the right form.
775 00:36:34 ♪ ♪
776 00:36:49 - [Elliott] Hi.- Hi, pumpkin.
777 00:36:52 [Elliott] How was your day?
778 00:36:54 It was fine.
779 00:36:57 How was yours?
780 00:36:59 Very good.
781 00:37:02 Good.
782 00:37:03 [Elliott] Okay, if we weren'tthe same person
783 00:37:06 and you just met me at a party,do you think you'd even like me?
784 00:37:10 [Older Elliott] Okay. You want to know
785 00:37:12 what's one of the best thingsabout getting older?
786 00:37:14 [Elliott] What?
787 00:37:16 [Older Elliott] You stop worrying so muchabout if other people like you.
788 00:37:19 - [Elliott] Mm.- [Older Elliott] It's kinda great.
789 00:37:21 [Elliott] I feel like...
790 00:37:23 feel like I've been kind of an asshole.
791 00:37:25 [Older Elliott] Ah, you're just 18.
792 00:37:27 Honestly, everyone's kind of an assholeat that age.
793 00:37:30 Why?
794 00:37:33 Are you okay?
795 00:37:38 Elliott? Hello?
796 00:37:41 - [mouthing]- [Elliott] I just feel like everything
797 00:37:43 - that used to make sense doesn't anymore.- [mouthing]
798 00:37:44 - [Older Elliott] Yeah.- [Elliott] Like, even Chelsea.
799 00:37:47 Like, she's... she's literally beenmy dream girl for so long.
800 00:37:51 - [Elliott] Like, you know how long.- [Older Elliott] Yeah, I know.
801 00:37:53 - [Elliott] And she's so hotand the sex is so amazing.
802 00:37:55 - [Older Elliott] Yeah.- [Elliott] I'm-I'm so confused.
803 00:37:58 [Older Elliott] Well, this isn'tgonna be the last time
804 00:38:00 you get exactly what you wantand then realize it isn't what you wanted.
805 00:38:06 [Elliott] How do you ever knowwhat you want, then?
806 00:38:08 Like, when you actually fall in love,how do you know that it's real?
807 00:38:11 [Older Elliott] Uh... you don't.
808 00:38:14 I feel like it's just, like,everything feels right,
809 00:38:17 even when it's really hard--correct me if I'm wrong.
810 00:38:20 Uh, yeah, you're wrong. You're very wrong.
811 00:38:23 [laughing] Sorry.It's just hard to explain.
812 00:38:26 Try! Give me something!
813 00:38:29 Okay. God! I mean, okay.
814 00:38:32 Love... like, healthy love...
815 00:38:37 I guess it's like...
816 00:38:42 ...safety and freedom all at once?
817 00:38:49 Sick. Sick.
818 00:38:50 Safety and freedom. Okay.
819 00:38:53 Okay, look, I know it doesn'tsound romantic to you, but it is.
820 00:38:56 Trust me. God.
821 00:38:59 [moaning softly]
822 00:39:01 [tender music playing]
823 00:39:17 [shuddered breaths]
824 00:39:21 - [gasps, panting]- [music stops]
825 00:39:29 - [excited chattering]- [birds chirping]
826 00:39:33 [Tom laughs] Wow.That's-that's pretty impressive.
827 00:39:36 [Spencer] Did you see any monkeys?
828 00:39:38 [chattering continues]
829 00:39:40 [cutlery clinking on plates]
830 00:39:44 [chattering continues]
831 00:39:47 [Kathy] Give your little brother a break.
832 00:39:48 Oh, good morning, Elliott.
833 00:39:50 Have you met Chad?
834 00:39:53 - Um...- [Kathy] He's working here this summer.
835 00:39:55 He was kind enough to come and help Dadwith the tractor this morning.
836 00:40:00 Come on, sit down.Have some pancakes before they get cold.
837 00:40:05 Here, yeah. Could you pass me that?
838 00:40:06 [Tom] Yeah.
839 00:40:08 [cutlery clinking on plates]
840 00:40:11 Sup? [clears throat]
841 00:40:15 [Kathy] So, uh, you were telling usabout your plans after undergrad.
842 00:40:19 Oh, yeah. Um...
843 00:40:21 Yeah, well, I originally wantedto get into engineering,
844 00:40:25 but now I think I'm leaningmore towards biotechnology.
845 00:40:28 - Hmm.- And, um,
846 00:40:30 hopefully getting my master'sin pharmaceutical science,
847 00:40:33 uh, to focus on, like, underfundedcancer drug research and stuff.
848 00:40:37 - [Kathy] That's very cool.- Yeah.
849 00:40:39 - A literal angel in our presence.- [Chad laughs]
850 00:40:41 If you want to be a drug doctor,
851 00:40:43 why are you spending your summeron a cranberry farm?
852 00:40:45 Ah, for the money and the fame.
853 00:40:47 [Tom] He's a Chatsworth, Elliott.
854 00:40:50 One of the originalcranberry farmers in the area.
855 00:40:53 Owned the place two lines down.
856 00:40:56 His grandfather was close friendswith your grandfather.
857 00:40:59 You two are-are practically blood.
858 00:41:01 [coughs]
859 00:41:03 - Are we... related?- [Chad laughs]
860 00:41:06 Well, I think it's wonderfulthat you're staying with your grandmother.
861 00:41:08 She must be thrilled.
862 00:41:10 Yeah, I-I never, um,met my grandfather or, um,
863 00:41:14 uh, even got to see the farmbefore it got sold or anything,
864 00:41:16 - 'cause he died before I was born, but--- Hmm.
865 00:41:19 [Chad] Yeah, it's been,it's been really nice.
866 00:41:21 I think I just wanted to...get in touch with my roots,
867 00:41:25 if that isn't the cheesiest thingyou've ever heard.
868 00:41:28 - No. It's not cheesy.- [light laughter]
869 00:41:30 That's wonderful.
870 00:41:32 - Mm.- [Kathy] No. I think that's nice.
871 00:41:34 We're late for our tee time, Max.
872 00:41:38 Oh, uh...
873 00:41:40 Chad, do you want to come golfing with us?
874 00:41:42 You want Chad to come?
875 00:41:45 - You don't have to. You really--- I, if...
876 00:41:47 I would love to, if that's...
877 00:41:49 Okay, great.Let me get you some coffees to go.
878 00:41:52 [club strikes ball solidly]
879 00:41:54 - [Max] Oh!- [Chad laughs]
880 00:41:56 Dude, what?
881 00:41:58 - You're insane.- [chuckles]
882 00:41:59 You're the real deal.
883 00:42:01 - You're a professional golfer. Okay.- [Max] Come on.
884 00:42:02 [Chad] You should have told me.
885 00:42:04 I'm about to embarrass myself.
886 00:42:05 [Max] Oh, come on. I'm sure you're betterthan you think you are.
887 00:42:09 Nope.
888 00:42:12 Elliott, uh, Elliott said you were gonnatake over the farm, man.
889 00:42:15 - You should just be a golfer.- [Max laughs]
890 00:42:16 [Max] Yeah, I mean, my mom and dadare selling the farm, so...
891 00:42:19 - might be my only option now.- [club strikes ball solidly]
892 00:42:21 What?
893 00:42:24 Who told you Mom and Dadare selling the farm?
894 00:42:27 Uh, Mom and Dad.
895 00:42:29 What?
896 00:42:30 Dude, what the fuck?
897 00:42:33 Actually, what are you talking about?
898 00:42:35 What? Like they would tell you and not me.
899 00:42:37 They thought you wouldn't care'cause you're not taking it over anyway.
900 00:42:40 - What?- All you do is talk about leaving.
901 00:42:42 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
902 00:42:44 Mom and Dad are not selling the farm.
903 00:42:46 We'll go to them and be, like,"This is fucked, you can't sell it,"
904 00:42:49 - and they won't sell it.- I already tried that. It didn't work.
905 00:42:51 Fuck, really?
906 00:42:53 - [pocket zips shut]- Max!
907 00:42:55 Why are you acting likethis isn't a big deal?
908 00:42:57 - Why are you not upset?- I am upset.
909 00:42:59 - You don't look upset at all.- Well, I've known for a while.
910 00:43:01 You've known for a while?
911 00:43:03 So, I'm old upset.
912 00:43:05 Old upset is different than new upset.
913 00:43:06 How have I been so left out of this?
914 00:43:08 You kind of leave yourself out,Elliott. [scoffs]
915 00:43:12 Max!
916 00:43:17 Dad! You're selling the farm?!
917 00:43:23 This is insane.
918 00:43:24 This? This is our lifeblood.This is our roots.
919 00:43:28 Our-our blood, sweat and tears,our history, our literal life.
920 00:43:31 I'm really sorry, Elliott.
921 00:43:32 [laughs] I honestly didn't thinkyou'd care.
922 00:43:35 Are you selling itbecause I'm not taking it over?
923 00:43:37 No, there are lots of reasons,none of which have to do with you.
924 00:43:42 [sighs softly]
925 00:43:45 I'm really sorry, Elliott.
926 00:43:46 It's already in progress.
927 00:43:48 We got a really good offerwe couldn't turn down.
928 00:43:50 We'll pass it over after the fall harvest.
929 00:43:54 And you were just nevergoing to mention it?
930 00:43:56 Of course we were. We tried a few times.
931 00:43:59 Hard to peg you down, kiddo.
932 00:44:03 Thought you'd be happy about it.
933 00:44:06 All you talk about is leaving this place.
934 00:44:07 My God! I assumed it would always be here!
935 00:44:09 You know what they say:
936 00:44:11 Assumptions are made.Most assumptions are wrong.
937 00:44:14 Is that what they say, Dad?
938 00:44:16 Why don't you put iton a hand towel, then?!
939 00:44:21 [♪ Andy Shauf: "Martha Sways"]
940 00:44:25 [phone line ringing]
941 00:44:29 [Elliott] Where are you?Why are you not answering?
942 00:44:32 I've sent you, like, 50 fucking messages.
943 00:44:36 [line ringing]
944 00:44:40 [line continues ringing]
945 00:44:44 Max told me about the farm.
946 00:44:48 Is there anything I can do, like...to stop it?
947 00:44:53 ♪ Pretty just like you ♪
948 00:44:56 I only have a week left here.
949 00:44:59 Just please call me, okay?
950 00:45:00 ♪ I held her close ♪
951 00:45:05 ♪ Like I held you ♪
952 00:45:15 ♪ Martha sways ♪
953 00:45:20 ♪ And I follow suit ♪
954 00:45:26 ♪ She fills my glass ♪
955 00:45:31 ♪ And I toss it back ♪
956 00:45:37 ♪ Into the space that once held you ♪
957 00:45:41 [line ringing]
958 00:45:49 [line continues ringing]
959 00:45:55 [engine rumbling]
960 00:46:01 [grunts]
961 00:46:03 [turns off engine]
962 00:46:05 - Are you doing anything right now?- [song ends]
963 00:46:07 [sprinkler whirring]
964 00:46:09 You want to help me sell my boat?
965 00:46:14 [Chad] Yeah, I had heardsome rumors, like,
966 00:46:17 about zoning changes and it was affectingthe reservoir ponds and...
967 00:46:21 Something like that,and I... I don't know.
968 00:46:26 I didn't know it wasa for-sure thing, but...
969 00:46:30 Fuck.
970 00:46:31 So even the summer boy workersknew about it before me.
971 00:46:34 Whoa! Summer boy workers?
972 00:46:36 I was fine leaving.
973 00:46:38 I was really excited to leave, but...
974 00:46:41 I just always thought it wasgoing to be here to come back to.
975 00:46:45 So, it feels really different now.
976 00:46:49 'Cause when I leave,I'm saying goodbye forever.
977 00:46:57 And I hate goodbyes.
978 00:47:03 I just really wish that timewould just stop for a second
979 00:47:06 so I could enjoy itfor a little bit longer.
980 00:47:16 Sorry. I shouldn't be ventingall this at you,
981 00:47:19 - like, throwing it at you.- What?
982 00:47:20 Dude, no, I... I actually, uh, I get it.
983 00:47:30 Do you remember the last timeyou went out with friends as a kid
984 00:47:34 and just played pretend the whole day?
985 00:47:39 I remember doing that a lot.
986 00:47:42 Yeah? Do you rememberthe very, very last time you ever did it?
987 00:47:50 Isn't that sad?
988 00:47:52 You know, to think that there was a time
989 00:47:54 when you were out biking aroundwith your friends,
990 00:47:57 pretending you were getting chasedby zombies,
991 00:48:00 you were just all dirty and sweatyand having the best time and then...
992 00:48:06 ...you went home and parked your bikein the garage and went to bed,
993 00:48:12 not realizing that that was the last timeyou were ever going to get to do that.
994 00:48:20 But then, the thing aboutnot saying goodbye is that you also miss
995 00:48:24 savoring when it's gonna be, like,the last time you get to do that thing.
996 00:48:33 I don't know, I, I...
997 00:48:36 ...sort of...
998 00:48:37 It doesn't make sense.
999 00:48:41 - It was deep as hell, Chad.- [tender music playing]
1000 00:48:43 [scoffs] Yeah.
1001 00:48:45 I went to Poetry University.
1002 00:48:49 Majored in deepness.
1003 00:48:51 ♪ ♪
1004 00:48:54 - [Elliott] Oh, my God! Fuck.- Oh!
1005 00:48:57 [Chad exhales heavily]
1006 00:48:59 ♪ ♪
1007 00:49:15 Sorry. [clears throat]
1008 00:49:17 [Elliott] No, you're good. I...
1009 00:49:21 [engine rumbling]
1010 00:49:22 - Um...- Um...
1011 00:49:24 [Chad clears throat]
1012 00:49:27 Sorry, uh...
1013 00:49:29 No, it's... Yeah, I...
1014 00:49:31 I have to go.I have a dentist appointment.
1015 00:49:33 - You... you have a dentist appointment?- Yeah.
1016 00:49:35 I, my tooth... My tooth is...fucked-up, so I have to,
1017 00:49:40 I have to go,but can you just get the, um...
1018 00:49:42 At this, this dock, can you just take itthe rest of the way?
1019 00:49:45 - [Chad] I-I mean--- [Elliott] Just back to my house is fine.
1020 00:49:47 - Just, I just have to go.- Okay.
1021 00:49:48 [Elliott] Do you haveyour boating license?
1022 00:49:49 - [Chad] No.- Okay.
1023 00:49:51 [phone line ringing]
1024 00:49:53 - [water burbling in distance]- [birds chirping]
1025 00:49:54 [ringing continues]
1026 00:49:57 [sighs heavily]
1027 00:49:59 [ringing continues]
1028 00:50:02 [Elliott] Fuck.
1029 00:50:03 [Ro] I mean, there's only a few stemsand broken bits left.
1030 00:50:06 That should be enough for just me, right?
1031 00:50:08 - Yeah, sure.- Okay.
1032 00:50:09 Wait, yo. What's going on with you?
1033 00:50:11 You've been MIA as fuck lately,
1034 00:50:14 and then you show up here manic as hellon a Wednesday
1035 00:50:17 during the random-ass part of the dayasking for-for shroomies.
1036 00:50:20 I've been so busy.The busiest I've ever been.
1037 00:50:23 - Right.- It's like-- it's not like that.
1038 00:50:26 Why are you looking at me like that?I'm fine.
1039 00:50:28 Is this about the farm?
1040 00:50:32 [whispers] It's about so many things.
1041 00:50:34 But just trust me when I sayit's so complicated.
1042 00:50:39 Okay? Okay.
1043 00:50:43 I mean, I'm not just gonna let yougo alone in the woods.
1044 00:50:47 [birds chirping]
1045 00:50:50 I mean, uh... Oh, it's...I think that's a good amount.
1046 00:50:54 [groans]
1047 00:50:56 Delicious. [clears throat]
1048 00:50:59 [Elliott exhales]
1049 00:51:05 Fuck me.
1050 00:51:11 Do you think I'm high yet?
1051 00:51:16 No.
1052 00:51:17 [Elliott] Okay, so I just did the shrooms.Again.
1053 00:51:19 Don't get mad! I'm just trying to...
1054 00:51:22 conjure you again because you won't answeryour fucking phone
1055 00:51:26 and I really need to talk to youand I don't know how this works,
1056 00:51:28 so if you get this, I'm on Maude Island.
1057 00:51:31 And I'm high.
1058 00:51:34 Well, I-I will be high.
1059 00:51:38 [loon wailing in distance]
1060 00:51:41 Oh, my God.
1061 00:51:43 [sighs]
1062 00:51:45 Ro?
1063 00:51:47 - [insects chirring]- [owl hooting]
1064 00:51:51 Ro?
1065 00:51:54 Dude, this isn't funny.
1066 00:51:57 Ro?
1067 00:52:01 Dude, what the fuck?
1068 00:52:02 [Chad] Hey.
1069 00:52:06 What are you doing here?
1070 00:52:07 Ro texted me and said you wantedto talk to me about something.
1071 00:52:11 What?
1072 00:52:13 They just left.
1073 00:52:14 What the fuck?
1074 00:52:18 What did you want to talk to me about?
1075 00:52:20 [owl hoots]
1076 00:52:23 [Chad sighs gently]
1077 00:52:26 Ro said something about you wantingto let me inside of your world.
1078 00:52:30 [slow rhythmic ticks]
1079 00:52:33 [bass thumps]
1080 00:52:36 [rhythmic drum sequence continues]
1081 00:52:38 What the fuck is going on?
1082 00:52:41 I think I'm yourone less lonely girl, Elliott.
1083 00:52:44 How did you know aboutmy Bieber fantasy as a nine-year-old?
1084 00:52:47 I know that while all the other girlsscreaming in the crowd
1085 00:52:52 wanted to be the one less lonely girl,
1086 00:52:54 you wanted to be Bieberhanding out those roses.
1087 00:53:00 [whispers] Now's your chance.
1088 00:53:03 - [girls screaming excitedly in distance]- [drumming continues]
1089 00:53:09 [over speakers] All right, let's go.
1090 00:53:11 [girls screaming louder]
1091 00:53:13 ♪ There's gonna be one less lonely girl ♪
1092 00:53:16 ♪ One less lonely girl ♪
1093 00:53:18 ♪ There's gonna be one less lonely girl ♪
1094 00:53:21 ♪ One less lonely girl ♪
1095 00:53:24 ♪ How many "I told you's"and start overs ♪
1096 00:53:27 ♪ And shoulders have youcried on before? ♪
1097 00:53:29 ♪ How many promises? Be honest, girl ♪
1098 00:53:32 ♪ How many tears you let hit the floor? ♪
1099 00:53:35 ♪ How many bags you packedjust to take 'em back? ♪
1100 00:53:38 ♪ Tell me that, how many either or's? ♪
1101 00:53:40 ♪ No more ♪
1102 00:53:42 ♪ If you let me inside of your world ♪
1103 00:53:45 - ♪ There'd be one less lonely girl ♪- ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
1104 00:53:49 ♪ Saw so many pretty faces ♪
1105 00:53:51 ♪ Before I saw you, you ♪
1106 00:53:53 - ♪ Now all I see is you ♪- ♪ I'm coming for you ♪
1107 00:53:57 ♪ I'm coming for you ♪
1108 00:53:58 ♪ No, no, don't need theseother pretty faces like I need you ♪
1109 00:54:04 ♪ And when you're mine in the world ♪
1110 00:54:06 ♪ There's gonna be one less lonely girl ♪
1111 00:54:10 ♪ One less lonely girl ♪
1112 00:54:12 - [music stops]- [Elliott panting quietly]
1113 00:54:16 [stifling laughter] What the fuck?
1114 00:54:19 - [music resumes]- ♪ Fix up your broken heart ♪
1115 00:54:21 ♪ I can give you a brand-new start ♪
1116 00:54:23 ♪ I can make you believe, yeah ♪
1117 00:54:27 ♪ I just wanna set one girl free to fall ♪
1118 00:54:29 ♪ Free to fall ♪
1119 00:54:32 ♪ Fall in love ♪
1120 00:54:34 ♪ Her heart's lockedand nowhere to get the key ♪
1121 00:54:36 ♪ I'll take her and leave the worldwith one less ♪
1122 00:54:38 ♪ There's gonna be one less lonely girl ♪
1123 00:54:42 ♪ One less lonely girl ♪
1124 00:54:44 ♪ There's gonna be one less lonely girl ♪
1125 00:54:47 ♪ One less lonely girl ♪
1126 00:54:52 ♪ One less lonely girl ♪
1127 00:54:56 - [music stops]- What in the fuck?!
1128 00:54:58 Who are you?
1129 00:54:59 I'm changing, I'm growing.
1130 00:55:00 - You are!- I'm learning.
1131 00:55:02 Do what you want to doand fly like a bird.
1132 00:55:04 - [Elliott laughing]- Wow.
1133 00:55:06 I actually don't ever want to talk to youabout this ever again.
1134 00:55:09 - Why?- I got what I needed
1135 00:55:11 Moving forward, there's nothing...We're not talking about it anymore.
1136 00:55:13 [both laughing]
1137 00:55:16 Okay.
1138 00:55:18 Oh, God. Justin fucking Bieber.
1139 00:55:20 [both sigh]
1140 00:55:22 I could use some butter.
1141 00:55:26 - Maybe some, um, salt.- [Elliott clears throat]
1142 00:55:32 Okay.
1143 00:55:33 I have a confession.
1144 00:55:38 Low-key. A low-key confession, okay?
1145 00:55:47 I have, like...
1146 00:55:50 ...weird feelings for someone.
1147 00:55:55 Okay.
1148 00:55:59 But...
1149 00:56:01 the fucked-up part is it's, um...
1150 00:56:08 [giggles]
1151 00:56:09 It's a guy.
1152 00:56:12 Oh, shit.
1153 00:56:15 You like a guy?
1154 00:56:18 Wow.
1155 00:56:19 This all makes so much sense now.
1156 00:56:22 - Am I bi?- Oh, shit.
1157 00:56:23 What does this actually fucking mean?
1158 00:56:25 I...
1159 00:56:27 I-I mean, shit, if you like him and--
1160 00:56:30 I've just always been so surethat I was only into women.
1161 00:56:33 Like, it's never beeneven a thought for me.
1162 00:56:37 I don't know. Like, I've just always...
1163 00:56:41 [sighs]
1164 00:56:42 I've just always been into women.
1165 00:56:44 But I'm just, when I'm with him...
1166 00:56:47 Like, dude.
1167 00:56:49 - Fuck.- No, it's fucked. It is actually fucked.
1168 00:56:52 Just 'cause you like a mandoesn't make you any less queer.
1169 00:56:55 I don't think any less of youfor being straight.
1170 00:56:58 - [thumping]- [laughing] No, sorry.
1171 00:57:00 - Straight?- [laughing]
1172 00:57:02 That's the fucking worst thingyou've ever called me in my life.
1173 00:57:05 Like, you said it yourselfabout-about labels and shit,
1174 00:57:07 and if they feel useful, then use them.
1175 00:57:09 And if they stop feeling useful,then stop using them.
1176 00:57:11 - Hmm.- You told me that.
1177 00:57:13 Listen to yourself. Listen to your heart.Your motherfucking gut.
1178 00:57:16 Listen to your gut.
1179 00:57:18 But I've also gotta listen to my old ass.
1180 00:57:23 You like asses now or something?
1181 00:57:25 - Yeah.- Same.
1182 00:57:27 I've been wanting to talk...
1183 00:57:28 I've been wanting to talk to youabout this for a while.
1184 00:57:29 - I, like, want to meet him.- Shut up.
1185 00:57:33 Is he cute?
1186 00:57:35 [giggling]
1187 00:57:37 [Spencer humming a happy tune]
1188 00:57:41 Oh!
1189 00:57:42 - [Spencer] Do you love it?- Spencer!
1190 00:57:45 I still have three walls to finishbefore I move in.
1191 00:57:48 Could you not have waited till I left?
1192 00:57:50 I actually thought you left.
1193 00:57:51 I'm not sleeping in that bed tonightwith her staring at me.
1194 00:57:54 Girl, this is not okay.
1195 00:57:56 Could you put this up there?I need to see the balance.
1196 00:58:00 [chuckling]
1197 00:58:02 - [Elliott blows through lips]- [Spencer laughs]
1198 00:58:04 Where?
1199 00:58:06 Right there.
1200 00:58:08 - Here?- No, uh, over there.
1201 00:58:11 Uh, up. Uh, down.
1202 00:58:13 - Uh, little to the left.- Oh, my God.
1203 00:58:19 [Kathy] Ugh. Can't believeyou leave in a few days.
1204 00:58:22 [Elliott sighs]
1205 00:58:24 You excited?
1206 00:58:31 I was thinking about you last night.
1207 00:58:35 And about how, when you were two...
1208 00:58:38 and you still hadn'tslept through the night. Ugh.
1209 00:58:41 [laughing] Oh, God,you were such a terrible sleeper.
1210 00:58:44 - [Elliott laughs]- I had to rock you for ages,
1211 00:58:47 and you were so specificin what you wanted.
1212 00:58:49 I had to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle."
1213 00:58:52 - [Elliott laughs]- And you needed your blanket.
1214 00:58:53 And you had to have two pacis,one in each hand, and a bottle.
1215 00:58:57 - Why was I so demanding?- I don't know!
1216 00:58:59 - It tracks.- [both laughing]
1217 00:59:03 And I remember one night,
1218 00:59:05 I think I must have been singing"Twinkle, Twinkle" for about 45 minutes.
1219 00:59:08 And my throat was so dryand my legs were all cramped
1220 00:59:11 and I thought, "Oh, Lord.I just can't do this for another second."
1221 00:59:15 You should have thrown me in my criband told me to get over myself.
1222 00:59:18 I know.
1223 00:59:21 So, what did you do?
1224 00:59:26 I kept rocking you.
1225 00:59:28 Mom! Self-care!
1226 00:59:30 - I know.- [Elliott laughs]
1227 00:59:34 But I remember one night,shortly after that...
1228 00:59:39 ...you turned to meand you just said, "Crib."
1229 00:59:45 All matter-of-fact.
1230 00:59:47 And so, I put you down
1231 00:59:51 and you looked at me and you smiled.
1232 00:59:57 And then you rolled overand you fell asleep.
1233 01:00:02 Just like that.
1234 01:00:06 And I was so proud of you...
1235 01:00:11 ...'cause you didn't need meto get you to sleep anymore.
1236 01:00:17 But, at that moment...
1237 01:00:20 [emotional sigh]
1238 01:00:22 ...I also realized that I wasn'tgoing to get to rock you anymore.
1239 01:00:31 And I guess that's how I feel now.
1240 01:00:35 Really proud of you...
1241 01:00:39 ...but also a little bit sad.
1242 01:00:41 [tender music playing]
1243 01:00:46 I'm gonna miss you.
1244 01:00:48 - So much.- Aw.
1245 01:00:50 And I still need you.Like, I'm literally an idiot.
1246 01:00:53 - I don't know anything, so--- No.
1247 01:00:56 You're not an idiot.
1248 01:00:59 [sniffles]
1249 01:01:03 [Kathy laughing]
1250 01:01:07 [Kathy groans]
1251 01:01:15 [tender music continues playing]
1252 01:01:28 [sighs quietly]
1253 01:01:30 ♪ ♪
1254 01:01:51 ♪ ♪
1255 01:02:14 ♪ ♪
1256 01:02:16 [bird calling]
1257 01:02:19 - [Ro giggling]- [Elliott] Shh. Shh.
1258 01:02:22 - [Ruthie] I'm so excited to meet him.- [Ro] Whoa.
1259 01:02:24 - Why am I sweating?- Why are you so nervous?
1260 01:02:26 You introduce usto every girl you're banging
1261 01:02:27 - within, what, like 30 seconds?- We're not--
1262 01:02:29 - That's true.- Oh, you're not banging?
1263 01:02:31 Hey.
1264 01:02:32 Um, these are my best friends.This is Ruthie, and this is Ro.
1265 01:02:35 - Hi.- [Chad] Hey.
1266 01:02:37 - [Chad] Nice to meet you.- Nice to meet you.
1267 01:02:39 I cannot believe someone actually wantsto purchase this boat.
1268 01:02:42 I know! Right when I came up withthe perfect name for it, too.
1269 01:02:46 Ready?
1270 01:02:48 Piece of Ship.
1271 01:02:50 - [Ro] Womp-womp.- [Chad] No?
1272 01:02:52 - That's the best you could come up with?- Okay.
1273 01:02:54 My alternative wasMotor? I Hardly Know Her.
1274 01:02:57 Right there! Golden. Much better.
1275 01:02:58 Or I had, I had Ship-Faced.
1276 01:03:00 Master Baiter.
1277 01:03:01 - Master Baiter. That's classic.- Um...
1278 01:03:03 - Playbouy.- Play... Yo, how-how does
1279 01:03:06 - [Elliott] That's What Sea Said.- I see why it works.
1280 01:03:08 That's What Sea Said is good, too, yeah.There...
1281 01:03:10 - There's so many options.- [Elliott laughs]
1282 01:03:12 Wait, did...
1283 01:03:13 Did you clean her?
1284 01:03:16 Uh, yeah, you know, just a little bit.
1285 01:03:21 This looks amazing.
1286 01:03:23 All the rust is literally gone.
1287 01:03:25 How did you do that?
1288 01:03:26 You know, just popped in a podcast,little bit of soap.
1289 01:03:29 Four to six hours of scraping.
1290 01:03:33 It was no-- it was nothing.I was, I was chillin'.
1291 01:03:38 You want to take her outfor one last spin?
1292 01:03:41 We're, no-- we're actually,we're late for something.
1293 01:03:43 We gotta head out.
1294 01:03:45 - If there was, like, four of uson this boat, we would all sink.
1295 01:03:47 Like, we gotta go, yeah, but, bro.
1296 01:03:49 [whispers] Way to make it obvious.
1297 01:03:50 [Chad] It was good to meet you guys.
1298 01:03:51 - [Elliott laughing] Bye.- Have fun.
1299 01:03:53 - [Elliott] Bye, guys.- You guys... be so safe, okay?
1300 01:03:56 - [Elliott] Mm-hmm.- Nice to meet you both.
1301 01:03:58 [Ro mocking] Don't rock the boat too much.
1302 01:04:00 - Ignore. Ignore. Ignore.- Sorry.
1303 01:04:03 [♪ Coeur de Pirate: "Comme des enfants"]
1304 01:04:05 [song continues in French]
1305 01:04:08 [talking indistinctly]
1306 01:04:13 [Elliott] What are you doing?
1307 01:04:20 [laughing]
1308 01:04:24 [Chad] Whoa!
1309 01:04:26 [song continues in French]
1310 01:04:30 [Elliott screams]
1311 01:04:42 [Chad howling]
1312 01:04:44 [Chad yipping]
1313 01:04:46 How's it chillin' over there?
1314 01:04:48 I'm chillin'... chillin' good over here.
1315 01:04:49 ♪ ♪
1316 01:04:51 - [song stops abruptly]- [both] Oh!
1317 01:04:59 Wait, wait, wait, wait.
1318 01:05:02 No, why are you laughing?
1319 01:05:03 What the fuck? What do I do?
1320 01:05:05 - Do we go back and get it?- You know what?
1321 01:05:06 - We cut the price to 350.- [Elliott laughs]
1322 01:05:09 Motor's at the bottom of Lake Muskoka now.
1323 01:05:11 Fuck!
1324 01:05:13 Don't worry, don't worry, don't worry.
1325 01:05:14 My dad's got, like, a whole stackof old motors in his shop.
1326 01:05:16 - It's fine.- [laughing]
1327 01:05:19 [thunder rumbles]
1328 01:05:22 Shit.
1329 01:05:25 - [Chad] Go, go, go, go!- Oh, my God.
1330 01:05:26 [Chad groans loudly]
1331 01:05:27 - What the hell? Why is the rain so cold?- It's so fucking cold.
1332 01:05:30 - It's so fucking cold. Hoodie?- What?
1333 01:05:32 - Wow.- I know. I come prepared.
1334 01:05:36 Turn around.
1335 01:05:38 Don't look.
1336 01:05:40 [laughing] I'm not looking.
1337 01:05:42 [thunder rumbles]
1338 01:05:57 [thunder rumbling]
1339 01:06:04 [Chad sighs]
1340 01:06:09 Thanks for the sweater.
1341 01:06:12 Anytime.
1342 01:06:16 It's warm.
1343 01:06:17 [laughing] Good.
1344 01:06:27 Do you feel like you foundwhat you were looking for by coming here?
1345 01:06:32 What do you mean?
1346 01:06:35 You mentioned something about...
1347 01:06:37 like, wanting to get in touchwith your roots.
1348 01:06:40 Like learning about cranberry farmingand stuff, so I just, I don't know.
1349 01:06:43 I wanted to knowif you felt like you did that.
1350 01:06:48 Yeah, actually.
1351 01:06:50 [chuckles] Um...
1352 01:06:53 My whole life,my family's been telling me,
1353 01:06:56 you know, how much I remind themof my grandfather.
1354 01:07:01 So I-I, I think...
1355 01:07:04 ...at least coming here,I-I got to know him or...
1356 01:07:08 understand him a little bit better.
1357 01:07:11 Which is cool.
1358 01:07:14 It's very cool.
1359 01:07:19 Where do you normally live?
1360 01:07:21 - Toronto.- What?!
1361 01:07:24 - Yeah.- I'm going to U of T in, like, a week.
1362 01:07:29 I go to U of T.
1363 01:07:30 Wait, what?!
1364 01:07:32 How have we neverfucking talked about this?
1365 01:07:34 - I don't know, man.- [chuckles]
1366 01:07:41 Cold?
1367 01:07:43 [thunder rumbling]
1368 01:08:03 I'm gay.
1369 01:08:11 [quietly] Cool.
1370 01:08:18 I thought I was gay.
1371 01:08:24 You thought you were gay?
1372 01:08:29 Yeah.
1373 01:08:32 Till I met...
1374 01:08:36 ...this person named Gary.
1375 01:08:40 - Gary.- Gary.
1376 01:08:42 And Gary made me realize that, um...
1377 01:08:48 ...I don't know, I'm bi or maybe pan.
1378 01:08:53 I've, like, yet to figure that out.
1379 01:08:57 But yeah.
1380 01:09:02 Okay.
1381 01:09:04 And then my friend...
1382 01:09:06 [groaning] Oh, my God.And then my friend was like,
1383 01:09:08 "Ah, don't do it. Gary's bad news."
1384 01:09:11 Whoa. Bad news?
1385 01:09:13 Mm-hmm. Bad news.
1386 01:09:17 What, what did Gary do?
1387 01:09:21 Well, she wouldn't tell meexactly what Gary did, but...
1388 01:09:27 I just... it-- yeah, it was--I just was not supposed to go there.
1389 01:09:31 With him.
1390 01:09:33 Hmm.
1391 01:09:38 This friend of yourssounds rather elusive.
1392 01:09:41 Oh, yeah.She's a real fucking buzzkill, but...
1393 01:09:46 I'm supposed to listen to her, so...
1394 01:09:51 [Chad] Hmm.
1395 01:09:55 What does your gut tell you to do?
1396 01:10:00 Re: Gary.
1397 01:10:05 My gut?
1398 01:10:12 My gut is, um...
1399 01:10:16 ...pretty interestedin what Gary's all about.
1400 01:10:23 - I see.- Mm.
1401 01:10:34 I like looking at your face.
1402 01:10:36 I like lookingat your face.
1403 01:10:43 I want to kiss you.
1404 01:10:44 [whispers] I want to kiss you.
1405 01:10:46 Stop copying everything I say.
1406 01:10:48 Sorry, you know I don't have a brain.
1407 01:10:49 - Don't make me insecure about it.- [laughs]
1408 01:10:52 Sorry, I'm bad at this, so...
1409 01:10:55 [♪ Feist: "Let It Die"]
1410 01:11:01 ♪ Let it die ♪
1411 01:11:06 ♪ And get out of my mind ♪
1412 01:11:12 ♪ We don't see eye to eye ♪
1413 01:11:17 ♪ Or hear ear to ear ♪
1414 01:11:26 ♪ Don't you wish ♪
1415 01:11:31 ♪ That we could forget that kiss ♪
1416 01:11:37 ♪ And see this for what it is...
1417 01:11:41 I've never had...
1418 01:11:43 dick sex before.
1419 01:11:47 Do you want to have...
1420 01:11:50 dick sex?
1421 01:11:53 Maybe.
1422 01:11:54 ♪ Of a broken heart ♪
1423 01:11:57 ♪ Isn't the ending ♪
1424 01:12:01 ♪ So much as the start ♪
1425 01:12:07 [birds chirping]
1426 01:12:13 [song ends]
1427 01:12:17 I'd invite you in, but...
1428 01:12:19 I don't really want my parents to knowI hooked up with a summer boy worker.
1429 01:12:22 - How embarrassing for you.- It's not good for me.
1430 01:12:35 See you later?
1431 01:12:37 Mm-hmm.
1432 01:12:40 - Okay, you need to go.- Okay.
1433 01:12:41 - I don't want them to see you.- I'm going, I'm going.
1434 01:12:44 - Stop staring at my butt!- [Elliott laughs]
1435 01:13:00 - Psst!- Oh, my God.
1436 01:13:02 - What was that?- What the fuck?
1437 01:13:04 What the fuck are you doing here?
1438 01:13:05 - Were you kissing Chad?- No.
1439 01:13:07 - No?- No. A little.
1440 01:13:10 What the fuck is that?
1441 01:13:11 [Elliott] Dude, where the fuckhave you been? I thought you fucking died.
1442 01:13:14 Dude, I was gone for four days, okay?
1443 01:13:16 Four days on my Hubbya retreat.
1444 01:13:18 I get back, I have 200 messages from you.
1445 01:13:20 What the fuck is Hubbya?
1446 01:13:22 It's, uh, transcendental meditation,but better, actually.
1447 01:13:25 Penelope Disick invented it.
1448 01:13:27 Oh, fuck, I was so worried about you.
1449 01:13:29 I had to eat, like, three pounds ofmy girlfriend's friend's weed to get here.
1450 01:13:33 - Oh, fuck.- Are you okay?
1451 01:13:35 What is that? Why? Why?
1452 01:13:37 It's not even dragonfly season yet.
1453 01:13:39 There are no dragonflies, dude.
1454 01:13:41 Dude, I told you,we don't tolerate drugs well.
1455 01:13:42 - I don't know what to tell you.- Oh, my God.
1456 01:13:44 I'm really high.I need water or something.
1457 01:13:47 You can't just disappear like that.
1458 01:13:48 You should have told meyou were going on some hoobie retreat.
1459 01:13:50 - Hubbya.- I found out about the farm.
1460 01:13:52 - And then all the Chad stuff happened.- What?
1461 01:13:55 What Chad stuff?
1462 01:13:58 - What? What?- I, uh...
1463 01:14:00 That's what I've been trying to,like, talk to you about.
1464 01:14:04 - I've been trying, okay? Really hard.- Uh-huh.
1465 01:14:07 And I get it now.Like, all the other advice was so good.
1466 01:14:11 Like, I was taking so muchof our life and...
1467 01:14:14 our family, like, for granted.
1468 01:14:16 Yeah, I see that now, okay?
1469 01:14:17 - Okay, well, you're welcome.- Mm-hmm.
1470 01:14:19 But I...
1471 01:14:22 I was just too scared to tell you...
1472 01:14:25 when I started falling in love with Chad.
1473 01:14:28 - [sighs]- I know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1474 01:14:31 I didn't want to let you down or...
1475 01:14:34 like, mess up our lifeor something, but...
1476 01:14:39 Just say it.
1477 01:14:42 - [whispering] We had sex.- [groans]
1478 01:14:44 I know. I'm sorry.
1479 01:14:47 I know you told me not to.
1480 01:14:49 But...
1481 01:14:51 Dude.
1482 01:14:53 Everything about him...
1483 01:14:56 ...like, feels so right.
1484 01:14:59 I'm sorry, but I've tried so hardto find one bad thing about him,
1485 01:15:03 and I literally can't.
1486 01:15:05 Dude, I don't understandwhy we wouldn't want to be with him.
1487 01:15:08 I just need you to tell me what he did.
1488 01:15:10 Like, just fucking lay it out 'cause I'mnot gonna be able to stay away from him.
1489 01:15:14 Like, the connection is too real.
1490 01:15:16 So, just fucking tell me what he did.
1491 01:15:19 - No.- What did he do?
1492 01:15:24 - Tell me what he does.- I can't.
1493 01:15:26 I swear to God... Tell me.
1494 01:15:28 It literally cannot be that bad.
1495 01:15:30 He died.
1496 01:15:32 That's what he did.
1497 01:15:36 Chad dies.
1498 01:15:37 And he dies after you have fallenso madly in love with him
1499 01:15:40 that you can't see straight, okay?
1500 01:15:42 After you can't imagineloving anybody else ever again.
1501 01:15:47 And no, you can't save him.
1502 01:15:48 I know that's what you're gonna say,but no, you can't save him.
1503 01:15:50 There's nothing you can do.
1504 01:15:53 And-and you can't findanything bad about Chad
1505 01:15:55 because there isn't anything badabout Chad, okay?
1506 01:15:58 [tender music playing]
1507 01:16:03 Elliott, it is so hard, okay?
1508 01:16:05 It is so, so hard, and I do not want youto have to feel that shit.
1509 01:16:10 ♪ ♪
1510 01:16:12 [Older Elliott sighs]
1511 01:16:21 [Older Elliott sighs]
1512 01:16:28 [breathes deeply]
1513 01:16:31 [sniffles]
1514 01:16:33 No.
1515 01:16:37 No?
1516 01:16:42 No, I'm gonna fall in love with Chad.
1517 01:16:49 I'm gonna love him...
1518 01:16:51 so hard for however long we have.
1519 01:16:55 Yeah, you're just saying thatbecause you're young and dumb.
1520 01:16:57 Okay, but if you weren't young and dumb,
1521 01:16:58 you'd never fucking be brave enoughto do anything.
1522 01:17:00 If you knew how shittyand unfair life would be,
1523 01:17:04 you'd never leave your house.
1524 01:17:05 You'd never enjoyspending time with anyone
1525 01:17:08 because you'd just be thinking aboutthe fact that they're gonna die someday.
1526 01:17:11 But when you're young and dumb,you don't even think about that.
1527 01:17:15 And that's what lets you actually live.
1528 01:17:19 So maybe being young and dumbisn't such a bad thing.
1529 01:17:21 Have you ever thought about that?
1530 01:17:23 [Chad] Hey, Elliott.
1531 01:17:28 You dropped this.
1532 01:17:29 Sorry to interrupt.
1533 01:17:40 Can you see her?
1534 01:17:41 See her?
1535 01:17:44 Yes.
1536 01:17:48 - Am I not supposed to?- [Older Elliott laughs quietly]
1537 01:17:51 Cool, cool. Um...
1538 01:17:55 - This is my Uncle Michelle.- Michelle.
1539 01:17:58 Hey. I'm Chad.
1540 01:18:00 Nice to meet you.
1541 01:18:03 Nice to meet you, too... Chad.
1542 01:18:06 I've never met an uncle named Michelle.
1543 01:18:08 [Older Elliott laughs] That's funny.
1544 01:18:10 [Chad] So, I hate to bethe bearer of bad news,
1545 01:18:13 um, I think this got run over by a car.
1546 01:18:16 Like...
1547 01:18:18 I don't know, but it wasn't me.
1548 01:18:20 - I don't know what happened. Uh...- [gentle melody playing]
1549 01:18:22 we can try to get it out with, like,like, bleach or something.
1550 01:18:27 And, you know, some...some good old scrubbing.
1551 01:18:29 But I just thought I wouldget it back to you...
1552 01:18:32 - [Chad continues indistinctly, distantly]- ♪ ♪
1553 01:18:40 [Chad continues distantly]
1554 01:18:42 ♪ ♪
1555 01:18:48 [Chad] ...could be a new thing,roadkill chic.
1556 01:18:52 [laughs]
1557 01:18:54 [Chad] Um...
1558 01:18:57 I will catch you guys later.
1559 01:18:59 No, no, don't, don't leave. Um...
1560 01:19:02 I was about to leave, so you stay.
1561 01:19:05 - [Elliott] What?- Stay with Elliott.
1562 01:19:07 - No, you weren't.- Yes, I was.
1563 01:19:08 No, you weren't.
1564 01:19:10 Yes, I was.
1565 01:19:12 ♪ ♪
1566 01:19:17 It was really nice to meet you... Chad.
1567 01:19:20 Yeah, it was good to meet you, too.
1568 01:19:24 ♪ ♪
1569 01:19:45 [laughs softly]
1570 01:19:52 [sniffles quietly]
1571 01:19:58 [sniffles]
1572 01:20:01 [Chad] Is she okay?
1573 01:20:08 Yeah, she'll be okay.
1574 01:20:11 Are you okay?
1575 01:20:14 Yeah.
1576 01:20:17 I think this is more ofa baking soda situation,
1577 01:20:20 now that I'm thinking about it,'cause I...
1578 01:20:23 I-I think if we put bleach on it,it would turn it all orange and stuff.
1579 01:20:26 But, I don't know.Either way, it's like a cold-water thing.
1580 01:20:29 ♪ ♪
1581 01:20:31 I really like you.Like, really... really like you.
1582 01:20:35 I really...I really, really like you, too.
1583 01:20:40 I'm really gratefulfor this moment with you.
1584 01:20:44 I'm very gratefulfor this moment with you, too.
1585 01:20:51 ♪ ♪
1586 01:21:13 - [insects chirring]- [birds chirping]
1587 01:21:20 [music fades]
1588 01:21:24 [water sloshing]
1589 01:21:31 [Kathy and Tom talking indistinctly]
1590 01:21:34 [Kathy] Well, you're gonnahave to get it yourself.
1591 01:21:36 - [Tom mutters]- [laughs]
1592 01:21:38 [Kathy] You want one of those things?
1593 01:21:47 [grunting]
1594 01:22:02 [Older Elliott] Hey.
1595 01:22:04 Um... [scoffs]
1596 01:22:06 Curve, curve!
1597 01:22:08 - [Older Elliott] I'm sorry. I...- I'm curving. [laughing]
1598 01:22:10 - [Max] I'm going this way.- ...hope...
1599 01:22:12 you're okay.
1600 01:22:15 - [Spencer talking indistinctly]- [Older Elliott] Um...
1601 01:22:17 I wanted to send you one last message.
1602 01:22:21 [Elliott] Come in.
1603 01:22:22 - [Older Elliott] You're right, Elliott.- [family chattering]
1604 01:22:25 I should listen to you.
1605 01:22:28 I never realized how wisemy young ass was.
1606 01:22:31 Okay, that sounded weird, but...
1607 01:22:34 [over phone] What I'm trying to say is...
1608 01:22:38 [sighs heavily]
1609 01:22:40 ...you're right.
1610 01:22:43 You shouldn't live your life for meor for the future
1611 01:22:47 or get stuck in the past,because that is not living.
1612 01:22:51 [Older Elliott inhales, exhales deeply]
1613 01:22:58 [exhales]
1614 01:23:02 I'm so happy you fell in love with Chad.
1615 01:23:06 - [Older Elliott inhales]- [sniffles]
1616 01:23:08 Because... loving Chad is a gift.
1617 01:23:13 And being loved by him... [scoffs]
1618 01:23:17 [Older Elliott's breath quivers]
1619 01:23:19 ...it's the best fucking thingin the world.
1620 01:23:23 [sniffles, crying]
1621 01:23:25 So just, fuck it,just keep being the naive,
1622 01:23:29 dumb, pore-less, smart...
1623 01:23:32 - [laughing]- ...happy, confident, brave,
1624 01:23:35 self-centered optimistic idiotthat you are because...
1625 01:23:39 it's perfect.
1626 01:23:42 And go live your life with Chad.
1627 01:23:44 Or Chad and your three wives
1628 01:23:46 or whatever you decide is right for you.
1629 01:23:48 - And I'll go live mine again, okay?- [laughing]
1630 01:23:52 I love you.
1631 01:23:53 [sniffles]
1632 01:23:56 Now, go say goodbye to that lake for me.
1633 01:24:01 And wear your retainerand moisturize, please, thank you.
1634 01:24:03 [bright melody playing]
1635 01:24:16 ♪ ♪
1636 01:24:34 Whoo!
1637 01:24:40 ♪ ♪
1638 01:25:08 [gentle melody playing]
1639 01:25:39 ♪ ♪
1640 01:26:11 ♪ ♪
1641 01:26:43 ♪ ♪
1642 01:27:15 ♪ ♪
1643 01:27:40 [lighthearted music playing]
1644 01:28:12 ♪ ♪
1645 01:28:40 [music fades]
