日班猎人 Day Shift(2022)(EN)Subtitles
| SRT Subtitles download |
1 00:02:21 -Yeah.
2 00:02:43 Who are you?
3 00:02:46 What are you doing in my room?
4 00:02:48 Where's Michael?
5 00:05:20 You missed!
6 00:05:55 Come on!
7 00:06:08 This old bitch.
8 00:06:11 Shit.
9 00:06:27 Works every time.
10 00:06:30 With your old ass.
11 00:06:37 When was the last time you been to the dentist, huh?
12 00:06:44 Money.
13 00:08:12 Do you know what the definition of insanity is, Sasha?
14 00:08:16 Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.
15 00:08:21 You cling to the old ways like a tick on a dog's ass.
16 00:08:26 And look at where that's gotten us.
17 00:08:28 You've made your point.
18 00:08:32 I accept your terms.
19 00:08:33 I think we're a little beyond that now, don't you?
20 00:08:37 I made a mistake.
21 00:08:38 You want this? You have it.
22 00:08:40 There you go again, lacking imagination.
23 00:08:42 "You, our, yours."
24 00:08:44 These are words of division, darling. And divided, we are vulnerable.
25 00:08:49 But together?
26 00:08:54 The sky is the limit.
27 00:08:59 And why rent when you can own?
28 00:09:04 No. No, no, no. No, no, no! No!
29 00:09:11 Maybe we can dig you up in 100 years and show you what we've done with the place.
30 00:09:17 No, no. Please!
31 00:09:19 No. No!
32 00:09:20 No....
33 00:10:13 Hey, Bud. Nice look.
34 00:10:55 Oh shit!
35 00:11:22 I'm calling because your husband is late again picking up Paige.
36 00:11:25 Do you have an ETA of when we should expect him?
37 00:11:28 All right, but this is the third time this week that he's late.
38 00:11:36 Paige!
39 00:11:38 -Hey, Daddy! -Come on, baby!
40 00:11:46 Well, what up?
41 00:11:49 -Who's your favorite daddy? -You.
42 00:11:51 I'm your only daddy, I hope. What's up?
43 00:11:54 -You're late, you know? -What?
44 00:11:55 -Are you serious? -Yeah.
45 00:11:57 You know why I'm late? 'Cause this job.
46 00:11:59 -Work is dumb. -Oh, well, yes, it is.
47 00:12:04 -A little something. -Shaboom! I love that.
48 00:12:07 -How about this? Hmm?
49 00:12:09 -All right. -Can we go to Yogurtworld?
50 00:12:12 Yogurtworld. Oh, Pickle, I don't know.
51 00:12:14 Your mom is already upset because we're late.
52 00:12:17 Whose fault is that?
53 00:12:19 Harsh.
54 00:12:20 But true. Roll the dice.
55 00:12:22 -And we gonna roll out. Here we go.
56 00:12:25 Hands in the air!
57 00:12:26 We taking off.
58 00:12:28 Yogurtworld, we're on the way.
59 00:12:30 Yogurtworld!
60 00:12:32 I'm gonna get strawberry. There it is.
61 00:12:39 Pow.
62 00:12:44 Boom! Got it.
63 00:12:47 -Boom! -Yeah. Boom.
64 00:12:51 Got it.
65 00:12:52 Got it.
66 00:12:54 You got it.
67 00:12:56 You're so weird.
68 00:12:57 If you only knew. All right, come on.
69 00:12:59 Excuse me, do you guys have any Black History Month discounts?
70 00:13:25 Home sweet home.
71 00:13:33 -We home!
72 00:13:34 You're late.
73 00:13:35 -Hey. -Hi.
74 00:13:36 We went to Yogurtworld.
75 00:13:39 Oh! Did you?
76 00:13:40 Snitches get stitches. We were gonna keep that between us.
77 00:13:44 Sorry.
78 00:13:45 It's all good. Gimme five on your way up.
79 00:13:47 -Whoo! -Nothing can stop you. All the way up.
80 00:13:50 Making a ten-year-old a part of your lies now. Charming.
81 00:13:56 Oh, she wanted to hang out with you.
82 00:13:58 See, that's something she coulda done if you'd taken her to school like I asked.
83 00:14:01 Well, I told you I had to go, and--
84 00:14:03 That pool cleaning appointment this morning?
85 00:14:05 -Exactly. -Right.
86 00:14:06 Whose house was it?
87 00:14:13 Where's she live?
88 00:14:21 -Right over there on Mr. Jones Way. -Oh my God. Bud.
89 00:14:23 We'd get much further if you'd be straight with me.
90 00:14:25 -I am being straight. -You're not.
91 00:14:27 I am being straight, but the question is, what is that sponge doing on the ground?
92 00:14:30 And this? What is all this?
93 00:14:31 I am fixing the broken tile.
94 00:14:33 Mm-hmm. I see that. And why?
95 00:14:34 Uh, what does it matter?
96 00:14:35 -You don't live here anymore. -Wow, that's what we doing?
97 00:14:43 Joss, what's this? This a new door?
98 00:14:48 A door with five locks doesn't exactly
99 00:14:50 send the right impression to potential buyers.
100 00:14:54 Buyers? Buyers? What are you talking about, Joss?
101 00:15:00 I'm thinking about selling the house and taking my mom up on her offer.
102 00:15:05 You and your momma.
103 00:15:06 Florida?
104 00:15:08 What are you talking about? You can't move to Florida.
105 00:15:10 All her friends are here. I'm here. Her world is here.
106 00:15:13 She needs stability.
107 00:15:14 She has stability. She got you. She got me.
108 00:15:17 She got Yogurtworld. Ain't no Yogurtworld in Florida!
109 00:15:19 Yeah, and she also has a school
110 00:15:21 that she's not gonna be able to go to unless we pay tuition by Monday.
111 00:15:25 Monday? Monday, like in seven days?
112 00:15:27 Yeah, which you would know if you had checked your voice mails.
113 00:15:30 Is that the stability you talk about?
114 00:15:32 -How much is it? -Five grand.
115 00:15:34 Five thousand dollars for a child?
116 00:15:36 Mm-hmm. And she needs braces.
117 00:15:38 -What's wrong? -Her teeth are jacked up.
118 00:15:40 She always says she likes her teeth 'cause they look like my teeth.
119 00:15:44 That's my point.
120 00:15:45 Okay. Well, how much are braces? What? Five, six hundred dollars?
121 00:15:48 -Without insurance, try six grand. -Six grand?
122 00:15:51 But I did find a guy who quoted me $4,800.
123 00:15:53 -I know we done been through a whole lot. -Yeah.
124 00:15:56 Just, please, don't take my daughter away.
125 00:15:59 Till Monday. Just give me till Monday.
126 00:16:02 Ten grand. Tuition, teeth, everything.
127 00:16:11 Okay, fine. I will give you till Monday.
128 00:16:13 Come on, hug me.
129 00:16:15 -Hug me. -I'm hugging you.
130 00:16:17 -Stop listening to your mom. She drinks. -What?
131 00:16:19 -Uh, Bud. -What?
132 00:16:21 I have one more question.
133 00:16:24 Paige said that there's a porn star living in your building?
134 00:16:27 How does she even know what a porn star is?
135 00:16:29 It's the Valley, Joss. They live amongst us.
136 00:17:03 Fellas. 'Sup, baby?
137 00:17:05 Who's thirsty? Hmm?
138 00:17:08 Business is booming, I see.
139 00:17:10 What's up, Eddie? Oh!
140 00:17:12 You always fast.
141 00:17:14 Is Troy here?
142 00:17:26 All right.
143 00:17:28 -Troy!
144 00:17:31 Decided to take me up on my offer?
145 00:17:33 Not today, not tomorrow, not anytime.
146 00:17:35 -Here, you thirsty? -Ooh. Thank you!
147 00:17:37 -Get some of that in you. -Fifteen hundred is good money.
148 00:17:39 Like I said, Troy, Snake Eyes ain't for sale now.
149 00:17:42 Everything's for sale. You just have to be desperate enough.
150 00:17:45 -So, what do you got for Troy? -Desperate, huh?
151 00:17:48 -That's what I got for Troy.
152 00:17:50 Money. All right.
153 00:17:52 Right there.
154 00:17:53 -Ooh, nice. -Count that.
155 00:17:57 -Oh, this is a young male. -Mm-hmm.
156 00:18:04 -Nasty habit, don't you think? -Yeah.
157 00:18:06 He would have died from smoking if he wasn't dead already.
158 00:18:11 Count the shit up.
159 00:18:12 Let's check this out. Uh, yeah, you see there?
160 00:18:16 -Yeah, solid bloodline. -Mm-hmm.
161 00:18:18 Must've gotten here through Mexico or something.
162 00:18:20 -He fed recently, you see that? -Yeah.
163 00:18:22 Okay. Well, how much?
164 00:18:27 Eight hundred? $800? A piece?
165 00:18:30 No, both.
166 00:18:31 Troy, what are you talking about? Look at that again.
167 00:18:34 -That's worth at least four grand. -Down at the Union.
168 00:18:36 -Why don't you try the Union? -Come on.
169 00:18:38 I can't go to the Union. You know that.
170 00:18:43 -That's why you're coming to me. Huh?
171 00:18:46 And I'm offering you 800 for both.
172 00:18:49 All right, forget it. Just check the Elder's.
173 00:18:51 Elder?
174 00:18:52 That's a different story. That's 20 grand.
175 00:18:56 Boom. Perfect. Done.
176 00:18:58 Yeah, yeah.
177 00:18:59 If she had been an Elder, which she's not.
178 00:19:04 Check this out.
179 00:19:05 A decade early and a whole lot of dollars short,
180 00:19:08 so I can give you like two grand for this.
181 00:19:11 -Two thousand, Troy? -Mm-hmm. Two thousand?
182 00:19:13 Listen, I don't think you understand. I need cash today.
183 00:19:16 Then go and rob a bank or do something. I'm a businessman!
184 00:19:19 Forget the Elder's. How about this? Silver.
185 00:19:25 -Just gonna put that in your mouth, huh? -This plated shit? Please, Bud.
186 00:19:30 You wanna make a deal or not?
187 00:19:35 Shit.
188 00:19:41 Snake Eyes, 1,500.
189 00:19:44 Ah, twelve.
190 00:19:45 You said 1,500 when I walked in here. It is 1,500.
191 00:19:49 Before I knew you were desperate.
192 00:19:51 That's everything I have.
193 00:19:54 Well, I think you have something else.
194 00:19:59 Are those Jordans?
195 00:20:04 What size?
196 00:20:27 Hey. Hey, Pickle. How you doing?
197 00:20:29 Dad, are we moving?
198 00:20:31 -Are we what? -Are we moving?
199 00:20:33 No. No. What makes you think that?
200 00:20:35 Mom says I might have to start a new school.
201 00:20:38 That's what Mom says, huh?
202 00:20:47 But we're not going anywhere.
203 00:20:49 You're not going anywhere, okay?
204 00:20:51 Okay, good. Thanks, Daddy.
205 00:20:53 -I love you. -I love you too!
206 00:21:12 I need you, bro.
207 00:21:21 We have already agreed to take delivery of the product
208 00:21:24 and to help with placement in Simi Valley.
209 00:21:28 You had no authority to take out Sasha.
210 00:21:30 I'm going to have to rethink our deal.
211 00:21:33 Sasha is the past, and I am the future.
212 00:21:37 We already own the night, but my product will allow us to seize the day.
213 00:21:42 So here is your choice.
214 00:21:44 You join me, and we take over the Valley, or you can join him. Comprendes?
215 00:22:53 It's just one man.
216 00:22:55 I can still smell him.
217 00:23:19 Find him.
218 00:24:19 Big J, you ain't changed a bit, baby. I see you. What's happening?
219 00:24:22 You know me, cutting necks and cashing checks.
220 00:24:24 Yeah. Thanks for meeting me, man.
221 00:24:25 Least I can do for the player that snatched my ass out the sandbox twice.
222 00:24:29 How's Seeger?
223 00:24:31 Same.
224 00:24:32 -Or worse. -Damn.
225 00:24:33 You think he'll listen?
226 00:24:34 -Things have changed since you left. -I ain't never left, Big J.
227 00:24:38 Well, since you got your ass kicked out the Union.
228 00:24:40 Look here. I'm putting my name and my ass on the line by vouching for you.
229 00:24:43 Can you play this shit by the books?
230 00:24:45 I got to. I got to get that Union card, or I'm gonna lose my family.
231 00:24:48 Look, I need ten large in the next five days,
232 00:24:50 or Joss is gonna take Paige down to Florida.
233 00:24:52 That's bad.
234 00:24:53 The Union is the only place gonna give me that kind of coin.
235 00:24:56 -I got you. Lock and load. -All right.
236 00:24:59 She's done this before, man. Pump faking, whatever.
237 00:25:00 But right now, it seems like it's real.
238 00:25:06 Hi, Momoko!
239 00:25:10 How are you?
240 00:25:13 Momoko.
241 00:25:15 Yes?
242 00:25:17 Pink penguin puffy pants.
243 00:25:24 See you ain't missed a step, Big J.
244 00:25:46 JJ Perry to the trade counter.
245 00:25:48 -Wow. -JJ Perry to the trade counter.
246 00:25:55 I don't know how I feel about this.
247 00:26:02 Things really done changed around here, huh?
248 00:26:04 Yeah, we ain't just 818 no more.
249 00:26:07 Look, Paris even blowing up tonight.
250 00:26:11 Bet money's good out there.
251 00:26:14 Let's go and get this thing over with.
252 00:26:18 How's the shirt look?
253 00:26:20 Stop being nervous, man. Pull yourself together.
254 00:26:28 Hey, Big John.
255 00:26:29 Well, hello, sunshine.
256 00:26:30 He's expecting you, but he's in one of his moods today.
257 00:26:51 I took this meeting out of respect for you, Big John.
258 00:26:53 God knows I wouldn't be sitting here without your support.
259 00:26:57 But, uh, I'm certain we all remember
260 00:27:05 chock-full of incidents.
261 00:27:08 Let's just take a look.
262 00:27:12 Northridge, 2014, violated code 103.
263 00:27:16 Encino, 2015, fleshed out a nest
264 00:27:20 while a child's birthday party was unfolding next door,
265 00:27:24 endangering civilians, violating codes 921, 833, and 605,
266 00:27:29 the worst of which was the failure to notify law enforcement in due time.
267 00:27:37 Canoga Park, 2017,
268 00:27:40 violated code 101, endangering a fellow Union member's life.
269 00:27:46 Critical injury sustained.
270 00:27:57 And yet, time and again, you were given warnings.
271 00:28:02 Why should I extend you yet another lifeline?
272 00:28:07 Ralph, let me be the first to tell you.
273 00:28:10 -Bud here, he's a new man. -Yeah.
274 00:28:12 Is that right?
275 00:28:14 Yes, sir. Absolutely. I'm a changed man.
276 00:28:26 If you were in my position, sitting across from a man such as yourself,
277 00:28:32 would you let you back in?
278 00:28:35 If that person that is in question admits fault
279 00:28:40 and be apologetic, which I am, and,
280 00:28:50 I really need to get out there. I need to do good.
281 00:28:53 I promise, if you give me that opportunity, I'm not gonna mess it up.
282 00:29:04 One last chance.
283 00:29:06 Now that we, uh, got that part settled,
284 00:29:08 I'm gonna go freshen up my coffee and let you gentlemen cross those T's.
285 00:29:14 That's a great guy. Great guy.
286 00:29:17 Really appreciate this second chance.
287 00:29:19 I don't know what the hell that man sees in you, Jablonski.
288 00:29:23 I mean, I know you served together, but, frankly, I don't care.
289 00:29:29 I've made it my life's work keeping cowboys like you out of the Union,
290 00:29:32 so I'll be watching you.
291 00:29:44 Quite.
292 00:29:47 Fill these out, all of them.
293 00:29:50 Once you pay your initial dues, we'll get you started on the health care plan.
294 00:29:54 There's dental included, right?
295 00:29:59 30 days.
296 00:30:00 Come on, man. Three days.
297 00:30:03 Two weeks.
298 00:30:04 -One.
299 00:30:08 Fine.
300 00:30:09 With a Union rep accompanying him in the field.
301 00:30:13 -Generous. Thank you. -Great.
302 00:30:21 -Not on my life. -Come on, Seeger.
303 00:30:24 -That's where the big money is! -No. Not a chance.
304 00:30:26 Amount of shit you stirred up working night shift,
305 00:30:29 you expect me to let you back out there where the sun don't shine?
306 00:30:32 Fine.
307 00:30:34 Day shift.
308 00:30:35 Good. Anything else?
309 00:30:38 No.
310 00:30:39 Oh, yeah. I got some, uh, teeth I need to sell.
311 00:30:43 Go to the cage.
312 00:30:44 Seeger, thank you kindly.
313 00:30:47 And remember, Bud,
314 00:30:50 one last strike.
315 00:30:56 -I'm saying there's a strike in bowl-- -You're back. That's all that matters.
316 00:31:12 Carol.
317 00:31:14 Carol, did you eat my yogurt again?
318 00:31:18 I even wrote my name on the lid today,
319 00:31:20 so you literally had to peel back my name to get to the yogurt.
320 00:31:25 Oh, what? You can't hear me?
321 00:31:28 I'm gonna fart in my yogurt, and you're gonna eat my fart.
322 00:31:31 Next.
323 00:31:36 Mr. Jablonski?
324 00:31:38 Yeah. Teeth.
325 00:31:40 So I look at it like this. I get back out there, do what I gotta do,
326 00:31:44 you know, for Mr. Mullet.
327 00:31:48 This is chipped, female.
328 00:31:51 Appears to be an almost Elder, roughly 90 years old.
329 00:31:55 Ninety? You probably need to check that again.
330 00:31:57 -You sure it's 90? -I'm sure.
331 00:32:00 Okay, whatever.
332 00:32:03 Full price still, right?
333 00:32:04 I'm sorry. Code 107 in the book clearly states anything--
334 00:32:07 Enough of the codes. It's fine.
335 00:32:19 However, due to the truncated processing time,
336 00:32:22 Mr. Seeger would like me to inform you we need your dues up front,
337 00:32:25 which, of course, is $5,000.
338 00:32:27 $5,000? I thought it was two?
339 00:32:28 Those are 2017 rates, Mr. Jablonski.
340 00:32:31 Then there is 15% off the top of every fang,
341 00:32:35 and we have to hold 50% until we receive your paperwork.
342 00:32:40 And, of course, $10 for your membership card,
343 00:32:43 which gets you one free app at Cheesecake Factory.
344 00:32:45 -I don't like cheesecake. -Do you have that?
345 00:32:47 Why won't you take the $10 out of that? Taking everything else.
346 00:32:49 You don't have cash on you? You really wanna make me split this?
347 00:32:55 Okay, you are good to go.
348 00:32:58 Am I?
349 00:33:01 If you have any issues with this,
350 00:33:02 Carol right here would be happy to further assist you.
351 00:33:05 Oh, great. I see you met your Union rep.
352 00:33:09 What?
353 00:33:14 Come on, Bud.
354 00:33:18 Sir, please.
355 00:33:19 That new girl's a smoke show.
356 00:33:21 Right, but I'm begging you to reconsider. I'm not meant for the field.
357 00:33:25 I just bought an ergonomic chair with my own money. I'm all in on the desk.
358 00:33:28 That's why I need you out there with him. Right? Someone who knows the codes to the letter.
359 00:33:32 -Okay, but-- -Hey, hey, hey.
360 00:33:33 Do you wanna move up here?
361 00:33:35 You gotta get your ass out in the field. All right?
362 00:33:37 Think about it this way, you're gonna be my eyes and ears, my friend.
363 00:33:40 -Right? -Right--
364 00:33:41 And the minute he messes up, the minute he goes against code,
365 00:33:46 you'll be there reporting it back to me, right?
366 00:33:50 The sooner he fucks up, the sooner your sweet cheeks are in Carol's desk.
367 00:33:58 You work out?
368 00:34:00 -A little. -Yeah, thought so.
369 00:34:27 You're late.
370 00:34:30 Close it.
371 00:34:38 I was actually here an hour ago, but you weren't, so I went to go get us breakfast.
372 00:34:47 I got you an organic, gluten-free, paleo bran muffin.
373 00:34:50 Really? Thank you.
374 00:34:53 -I was starving. -That was a six-dollar muffin.
375 00:34:55 -What do you have on? -What?
376 00:34:57 -What are you wearing? -Just, like, normal clothes.
377 00:35:00 The handbook says blend in on the hunt. Be inconspicuous.
378 00:35:03 You have on a suit. How's that inconspicuous?
379 00:35:05 You have on a suit. We're in the Valley. In the summertime.
380 00:35:07 -It's a summery suit. -A summery suit?
381 00:35:09 -Juniper green. Yes. -What is juniper green?
382 00:35:11 A hue of green I found to be complementary against my skin tone.
383 00:35:14 Whatever it is, don't wear it again.
384 00:35:17 Look, I'll put myself together, and we'll take off, all right?
385 00:35:22 -Do you have somewhere I can hang this? -Yep.
386 00:35:28 Not there.
387 00:35:38 This ain't gonna last.
388 00:35:49 Got enough weapons and ammo in here to take down El Jefe, huh?
389 00:35:53 What you know about El Jefe?
390 00:35:54 Oh, come on. Legendary 700-year-old European vampire.
391 00:35:58 Some say he's at the top of the LA drug trade, just waiting for his moment to reemerge.
392 00:36:02 Fangs so sharp, with just one, you could buy a mansion in Bel Air.
393 00:36:06 You sound like Big John.
394 00:36:09 Whole lot of gibberish. You know that's a crock of shit, right?
395 00:36:16 I didn't take you for an arts and crafts guy.
396 00:36:19 -What are these all about? -Wanna keep your hands off my shit?
397 00:36:22 It's my trophy case.
398 00:36:34 'Cause they're allergic to wood. Smart.
399 00:36:37 They're allergic to wood, but not just any wood. It's mpingo wood.
400 00:36:39 The strongest African hardwood. Not that Ikea shit.
401 00:36:42 We mix it with the garlic. The wooden bullets pierce the heart.
402 00:36:45 -The silver-- -Silver to the throat. Right.
403 00:36:50 Usually. Right, you are referring to Uber Vamps,
404 00:36:52 who have come back from decapitation.
405 00:36:54 Not if you blast the heart with wood before you cut their throats with silver.
406 00:36:58 Mm-hmm. You also forgot to mention that you can kill them by burning them.
407 00:37:01 I didn't forget anything. That's how I get my money.
408 00:37:03 Why would I burn the fangs? I don't do that.
409 00:37:06 Listen, Guacamole Suit,
410 00:37:08 right there on the shelf, grab that for me.
411 00:37:11 Get that, we'll take off.
412 00:37:21 So, uh, where we going?
413 00:37:25 I'm going hunting. I don't know about you.
414 00:37:38 Why you wearing the seat belt like that?
415 00:37:41 Um, yeah, I mean, usually the seat belts aren't like this complicated and heavy. But--
416 00:37:45 It's not complicated. It's just a seat belt. It protects you.
417 00:37:48 Sure.
418 00:37:50 Sure. It's still protecting me though. If anything happened, it's just--
419 00:37:56 See? It still catches me.
420 00:37:59 I see.
421 00:38:00 It's gonna be a long day.
422 00:38:12 So, are you gonna tell me what we're doing at an animal shelter?
423 00:38:15 I'm gonna tell you shit.
424 00:38:21 What you know about Juvies?
425 00:38:23 Juvies or Juveniles, AKA Zombie Vamps,
426 00:38:26 formed when an already young vamp turns somebody else.
427 00:38:29 Instead of the strength of a full vamp,
428 00:38:31 they lack regenerative abilities and appear more dead than alive.
429 00:38:34 They can't process human blood yet, so what do they do?
430 00:38:36 -I'm aware. -They feed off of small animals, rodents.
431 00:38:39 So you've read the book?
432 00:38:40 I don't have to read it. I'm out here.
433 00:38:42 What do you know about different species of vampires?
434 00:38:45 I know there are five types. Southern, Eastern, Spider, Uber, and Juvenile.
435 00:38:49 They are largely solitary, but when together, there is a hierarchy.
436 00:38:53 They organize by age. What else?
437 00:38:54 The sunlight is the only thing they're scared of.
438 00:38:56 They can't reproduce, but they can turn people. Should I continue?
439 00:39:00 -What about familiars? -You think this guy's one of them?
440 00:39:02 I don't know. You tell me.
441 00:39:06 -Hmm? -I think he fits the profile.
442 00:39:07 -You think so? -Absolutely.
443 00:39:08 More powerful vamps have more powerful familiars.
444 00:39:11 And when it comes to Juvies, a little kid like this,
445 00:39:13 he's probably grabbing those cats for 'em, try to get 'em turned.
446 00:39:19 -Oh man. -What?
447 00:39:21 No, I'm just a big cat lover. I got two of them myself.
448 00:39:25 Oh. Okay. Well, that explains it.
449 00:39:27 -Want to see a picture? -No, I don't.
450 00:39:30 Maybe later.
451 00:39:34 All right. Here we go.
452 00:39:42 There's his car.
453 00:39:54 Canoga Bowl. Closed for 18 months.
454 00:39:56 It's perfect.
455 00:39:58 -Can I offer some advice? -No.
456 00:40:00 I mean, economically speaking, why go after Juvies?
457 00:40:03 Why not let them ripen, come back when their teeth are valuable?
458 00:40:05 I could come back in September, but right now, I'm out of time.
459 00:40:09 And beggars can't be choosers.
460 00:40:10 Plus, you don't want these things biting people, do you?
461 00:40:14 Wait. Why don't you have time?
462 00:40:16 -Why you ask me so many questions? -I'm just--
463 00:40:18 Just stay in the truck and do your business.
464 00:40:20 Stay in the truck? No, I have to be with you at all times in the field.
465 00:40:23 -Union rules. -Other than keeping you alive,
466 00:40:24 I don't give a shit about rules.
467 00:40:26 No, no, you don't understand. All times.
468 00:40:28 You're gonna stay in this car. With that in mind, here.
469 00:40:31 -What? No, I don't believe in guns. -You don't believe in 'em?
470 00:40:34 No, they're amoral. They're killing machines. They're not for me.
471 00:40:39 When I was a kid, I tried shooting a squirrel with a BB gun,
472 00:40:41 and I just couldn't. All right?
473 00:40:43 I still have nightmares where I can see his little face
474 00:40:46 making little squirrel noises, and I still have nightmares about it.
475 00:40:49 Made squirrel noises, huh?
476 00:40:57 Whatever! I don't wanna talk about it.
477 00:41:00 Stay in the truck.
478 00:41:35 It's impossible.
479 00:41:37 How the hell can you be here? It's daytime.
480 00:41:42 You've been a bad boy, Troy.
481 00:41:56 Did you know that a vampire cannot live without its fangs?
482 00:42:07 they are the one thing we cannot regenerate.
483 00:42:13 Everything that makes a vampire a predator
484 00:42:18 is in its fangs.
485 00:42:21 Each set is a life that could have lived a thousand lives.
486 00:42:30 Lives that you had a part in ending.
487 00:42:38 Yet it wasn't always like this, you know?
488 00:42:41 There was a time when you humans, you worshiped us as gods.
489 00:42:47 Right here in this valley, you built temples of blood and bone to honor us.
490 00:42:52 And then you turned on us.
491 00:42:55 Well, guess what?
492 00:42:59 I'm gonna take back what's ours,
493 00:43:02 one property at a time.
494 00:43:08 The way I see it, you have two choices, two doors.
495 00:43:12 One, you bend the knee and join me in service, and you live.
496 00:43:19 you don't.
497 00:43:21 All right. So, what the hell do you want? Huh?
498 00:43:27 Who brought you this tooth?
499 00:43:32 A name.
500 00:43:35 You're so full of shit, lady.
501 00:43:38 You think you're a god?
502 00:43:40 You're not gods. You're a big mistake.
503 00:43:43 You're a genetic mutation that would've died out
504 00:43:47 if there hadn't been a stinking hole for y'all to crawl into.
505 00:43:52 Door number two it is.
506 00:43:54 No. No! No!
507 00:44:47 Time for the tooth fairy.
508 00:45:06 Hello, sir.
509 00:45:08 How are we on this fine morning?
510 00:45:11 Any violations to report?
511 00:45:13 He is certainly heading that way,
512 00:45:14 but nothing verified quite yet.
513 00:45:17 Well, where is he now?
514 00:45:19 He left me in the car and went into a bowling alley.
515 00:45:27 You didn't follow him?
516 00:45:28 I thought he was gonna shoot me! He's very difficult to reason with, sir.
517 00:45:31 Kid! You want your promotion?
518 00:45:33 You want Carol's desk?
519 00:45:34 Then get off your ass, get in there, and verify those violations.
520 00:45:44 Ugh! Hair on your nipples!
521 00:45:48 -Bud? -Seth!
522 00:45:50 -Seth! -Shit.
523 00:45:52 -Bud! -Hurry up! Shoot it!
524 00:45:55 -Give me my shotgun!
525 00:45:59 Your gonna be hors d'œuvre if you don't give me that gun!
526 00:46:01 Shit! Shit! Shit!
527 00:46:08 Whoa! I'm sorry!
528 00:46:09 Next time I tell you, "Gimme that goddamn gun," you gimme that goddamn gun!
529 00:46:12 -Now duck! -What?
530 00:46:13 I said duck!
531 00:46:24 You okay?
532 00:46:31 Oh, jeez. That was horrible.
533 00:46:36 It's a number game like you said. Uh, you okay?
534 00:46:39 What's going on?
535 00:46:41 Oh, come on. No, no, I'm not okay.
536 00:46:44 -All right? Look at me! -What?
537 00:46:45 Vampires just tried to kill me.
538 00:46:47 You put a gun in my face, and now I just pissed my favorite fucking suit!
539 00:46:52 Hey, hey. Relax. You did good in there. You did good in there.
540 00:46:56 Besides, everybody pisses themselves the first time.
541 00:46:59 -Really? -Yeah.
542 00:47:05 Here, dry your eyes. Dry your eyes, okay.
543 00:47:08 You know what?
544 00:47:10 Put it on me. My bad. We bit off more than we could chew today.
545 00:47:13 So why don't we go home, get some rest.
546 00:47:15 In the morning, we'll kick some motherfucking ass. Okay?
547 00:47:18 -Okay. -All right, come on.
548 00:47:20 Let's get in the car.
549 00:47:21 What the fuck is that? What'd you eat today?
550 00:47:24 You know what?
551 00:47:26 Let's have you get in the back. Don't want you to get that on my vintage seats.
552 00:47:30 -What, are you serious? -Damn right.
553 00:47:32 Come on. Gotta move.
554 00:47:41 Hang your leg out the back so we can air dry.
555 00:48:04 Hey. Hey!
556 00:48:06 -You forgot your man-purse. -Wait. That's expens--
557 00:48:10 You gotta get some of this too.
558 00:48:12 I'm sure you know, Mr. Union Man. But when vamps are killed,
559 00:48:14 they release a gas that gets on you that other vamps can sniff out.
560 00:48:18 So you gotta get all of that off. Here, take this.
561 00:48:21 It's my special blend, like a little, uh, skunk musk, okay?
562 00:48:24 -Now, get that on you, in the shower. -Oh Jesus.
563 00:48:25 On every inch of you, okay?
564 00:48:28 Be extremely careful. Don't get it in your eyes.
565 00:48:30 And whatever you do,
566 00:48:32 don't get it in your butthole. What happens in the butthole?
567 00:48:44 -Guess what? -What?
568 00:48:45 You're dried up.
569 00:49:28 -Oh God. It's okay. -I'm sorry about that.
570 00:49:31 -No, no, me. I got it. -It's okay.
571 00:49:33 It's my fault. I couldn't see over my baskets.
572 00:49:38 Uh, nurse, actually.
573 00:49:39 Hope you don't think this is weird, but you got a lot of scrubs.
574 00:49:43 Yeah, I mean, I hate doing laundry,
575 00:49:44 so I kind of just kept buying new ones.
576 00:49:46 -Got out of control. -Okay.
577 00:49:48 But, hey, new apartment. Why not start off on the right foot?
578 00:49:51 Yeah. Well, welcome to the building. I'm right there in 20.
579 00:49:56 -Oh! Well, I'm Heather. I'm in 19. -Well, I'm Bud 20.
580 00:49:59 Can you help me with that, actually?
581 00:50:00 Oh. Yeah.
582 00:50:01 -Thanks. -Yeah, no problem.
583 00:50:03 -You can just put that down anywhere. -Sure. Okay.
584 00:50:07 -See you've got a retro vibe poppin', huh? -Mm-hmm.
585 00:50:10 -Dig that. -Thanks.
586 00:50:12 I wish I had a beer or something to offer you.
587 00:50:15 Uh, a previous tenant left some ice cream in the freezer, if you're interested.
588 00:50:19 No, thanks. I'll take a rain check.
589 00:50:21 -You sure? -Yeah. Welcome to the building.
590 00:50:24 Thank you.
591 00:50:48 Feeling better?
592 00:50:49 Not really.
593 00:50:51 Got a little bit of that yellow stuff in my butthole.
594 00:50:53 It was so much worse than what you even described.
595 00:50:56 Bet it was.
596 00:51:04 You looking for something?
597 00:51:05 -Whoa. Hey, that's personal. -No, no, no.
598 00:51:07 "Violation code 101, terminated vamps and didn't report to the Union."
599 00:51:11 "Violation code 276, breaking and entering without Union sanctions."
600 00:51:15 -That did happen. -Violation. Violation. Violation.
601 00:51:18 Oh, look at this. "Needs to reimburse me for six-dollar muffin"?
602 00:51:21 It's a standard part of Union procedure.
603 00:51:23 -I have to document everything. -It's not.
604 00:51:25 It's for Seeger to keep me out the Union. Ain't that great?
605 00:51:28 You almost got me killed yesterday.
606 00:51:30 You almost got yourself killed yesterday.
607 00:51:32 I told you stay your punk-ass in the car. That's why I work by myself.
608 00:51:35 Listen. What? You're gonna die in the name of kissing your boss's ass?
609 00:51:38 Well, he didn't give me a choice, okay?
610 00:51:40 Listen to me, Mr. Union Fellow.
611 00:51:42 I may not follow all the Union rules, but let me tell you something.
612 00:51:45 If we went by the book, we'd both be dead by now!
613 00:51:49 And you saw that yesterday.
614 00:52:00 Look. Just give me a couple of days.
615 00:52:06 Okay, a couple days.
616 00:52:11 So, what's on the agenda today?
617 00:52:14 Like every day.
618 00:52:16 Hunting vampires.
619 00:52:25 Bud, what are we doing at a pawn shop?
620 00:52:31 What the hell?
621 00:52:39 Oh Jesus.
622 00:52:40 Shut up. Shut up.
623 00:52:47 Hey, hey.
624 00:52:48 Don't you puke in here! Don't touch nothing. Don't leave your DNA.
625 00:52:52 I swallowed it.
626 00:52:56 Troy.
627 00:52:58 Troy?
628 00:53:03 Damn it.
629 00:53:10 It was.
630 00:53:12 Oh no.
631 00:53:19 All right, we gotta move.
632 00:53:24 Wait a minute. Take this.
633 00:53:27 Are you kidding me?
634 00:53:28 -It's not right, okay. Wait-- -Damn right. How you think he feels, huh?
635 00:53:31 Come on, let's go.
636 00:53:32 Wait. You can't leave. That's against protocol.
637 00:53:35 We have to call the Union and wait for them.
638 00:53:42 We don't have 30 days. I don't give fuck!
639 00:53:44 We gotta leave. There's other vamps around here. Let's go.
640 00:53:46 No, no. I'm calling.
641 00:53:49 Whoa! We have dead humans here. We have to report this.
642 00:53:51 That ain't no dead human! That's my friend!
643 00:53:55 Listen, I'm not telling you you cannot report it.
644 00:53:57 I'm just telling you to delay it.
645 00:53:59 We'll make an anonymous call to the cops, and, after 24 hours,
646 00:54:02 you can make your funky little report. Let's go!
647 00:54:04 Why do you care? What difference does a day make?
648 00:54:06 I'm gonna lose my family in a day! That's the difference!
649 00:54:09 What?
650 00:54:10 Look, if I don't score some prices at Union wages by Monday,
651 00:54:14 my wife and my daughter move to Florida.
652 00:54:17 That means, if you call Seeger, I'm gonna lose my family.
653 00:54:25 Yeah, I bet you are.
654 00:54:38 You told me your secrets. I'm gonna break protocol for you.
655 00:54:41 -So we're like a team, partners, whatever. -I didn't say partners.
656 00:54:43 -Crockett and Tubbs. -No.
657 00:54:45 -Any partnership you find satisfactory. -Listen.
658 00:54:47 What I'm saying is this, is as a man, just give me till the weekend.
659 00:54:54 Yeah, okay. Until the weekend.
660 00:54:57 Yeah.
661 00:55:03 Look. What do you want me to do?
662 00:55:07 Just relax.
663 00:55:39 I got a tip on this house from Big J.
664 00:55:42 Why don't you check the glove box right now?
665 00:55:46 Yeah.
666 00:55:47 That's what we're doing right there.
667 00:55:50 That's what we doing.
668 00:55:53 Pull the pin, garlic and sawdust comes out, clears the room.
669 00:55:56 I think. Haven't actually had to use it.
670 00:55:58 But, in theory, that's what's gonna happen.
671 00:56:01 An unproven weapon for my first real vampire fight.
672 00:56:04 -That's wonderful. Thank you. -Shit. Shit!
673 00:56:05 What? What?
674 00:56:06 Goddamn Nazarian Brothers.
675 00:56:08 Wait, the Nazarian brothers.
676 00:56:10 Oh, they're big-time hunters.
677 00:56:12 Yeah, not bigger than me though.
678 00:56:15 They cleared out all of Glendale. Now they're headed west.
679 00:56:21 -Hey, Bud.
680 00:56:23 I thought I smelled chlorine.
681 00:56:25 Funny. Thought I smelled shit.
682 00:56:29 -Who's the cupcake? -Seth.
683 00:56:31 I'm his Union rep. But you can call me Cupcake or whatever you prefer.
684 00:56:34 -I'm a big fan, by the way. -Want to get a selfie for your Instagram?
685 00:56:39 What you guys doing in Simi Valley?
686 00:56:41 You know what we're doing here, bro.
687 00:56:43 We let you do the hard part for us,
688 00:56:44 figure out which house is hiding the goods, then, you know.
689 00:56:47 You got me twisted. I did the work, but I ain't do it for you.
690 00:56:50 Oh, come on, Bud. Think about it.
691 00:56:52 Waste a week waiting for the right moment that we just might take from you?
692 00:56:56 Or we run up there in force right now.
693 00:56:58 Sack the place together. Split the money down the middle.
694 00:57:00 Well, one, ain't nobody taking shit from me.
695 00:57:12 Yeah. It's a good idea.
696 00:57:17 -Wanna get a selfie?
697 00:57:19 Right now? Is that appropriate?
698 00:57:21 -We can wait-- -That's not appropriate at all.
699 00:57:24 -What's this? -Keep your neck from getting chewed out.
700 00:57:28 Take this. Stay behind me. I keep you alive.
701 00:57:31 Don't shoot where they are. Shoot where they're gonna be.
702 00:57:34 You ready? Let's go.
703 00:58:24 What's the garlic for?
704 00:58:25 Any vamp gets close to me, I spit in their eye,
705 00:58:27 melt hole in their fucking head.
706 00:58:29 Bro, you got any more gum?
707 00:58:35 -You always share that with your brother? -We share everything.
708 00:58:42 D, you're supposed to pry that shit open, not smash it.
709 00:58:44 Hey. Are we inside the house or not, bro?
710 00:58:47 Don't even think about it.
711 00:58:58 -Got him.
712 00:59:01 Nice shot, bro. Time to get paid.
713 00:59:04 Open up.
714 00:59:09 I told him not to do it.
715 00:59:14 -Really? -I'm sorry.
716 00:59:15 -Put that gun down. -Okay.
717 00:59:16 -Take your finger off the trigger. -Right. Okay.
718 00:59:40 -It's a hive. -What?
719 00:59:44 Showtime, bro.
720 01:00:10 Head on out.
721 01:00:13 Bitch-ass.
722 01:00:26 Keep your head on a swivel, all right? And stay away from the walls.
723 01:00:29 -Oh shit! Bud!
724 01:00:36 Ah! You gotta stop wiggling!
725 01:00:39 Oh no!
726 01:00:40 No!
727 01:00:42 -Oh shit! The gun's broken!
728 01:00:44 -Take the safety off! -Help, Bud! My gun's not working.
729 01:00:46 Oh, come on!
730 01:00:58 Oh God!
731 01:01:18 Buckshot mouthwash, baby.
732 01:01:22 Nice, bro. Yes.
733 01:01:25 I got six.
734 01:01:26 You got six. I got five. I'll catch you up.
735 01:01:36 Oh shit! Bud, help me!
736 01:01:43 -Wait, hold up! Wait, hold on! Ah!
737 01:01:54 Don't let it bite you, Seth!
738 01:02:00 Haircut time, bro.
739 01:02:05 I'm out!
740 01:02:50 Bud, help me! Bud, help!
741 01:02:53 This motherfucker threw me up the stairs?
742 01:03:08 Bro, send one!
743 01:03:26 No good!
744 01:03:28 Nice work, bro.
745 01:03:29 Help! Help me!
746 01:03:43 -Seth, my shotgun!
747 01:04:03 -Big money, baby. -Huh? This is what I was talking about.
748 01:04:05 -This was good, yes? -Very good.
749 01:04:07 What happened to you? You piss your pants?
750 01:04:13 It's kinda my thing.
751 01:04:14 -Bro. -What you doing? What're you doing?
752 01:04:16 Listen, pee-pee pants, this is man's world, not little boy.
753 01:04:19 Gonna get you a Pamper. Anyway, listen. Be safe, man. Okay?
754 01:04:22 I'mma take this and put it towards my baby girl's tuition, you know?
755 01:04:28 Familiar on the run.
756 01:04:29 I got it.
757 01:04:34 -He's up again. That was vampire. -I know.
758 01:04:37 Streets done changed. I hear they got this sunscreen that they put on.
759 01:04:40 It's real thick, and they can now last out in the sunlight like 15, 20 minutes.
760 01:04:44 You know it's made from the shell of desert tortoise.
761 01:04:47 It's illegal in 40 countries, right, bro?
762 01:04:48 Vampire sunscreen? The Valley? I don't like the sound of this.
763 01:04:51 -Hey, wait, this doesn't make sense. -'Sup?
764 01:04:54 Okay, that's a Spider, but that's an Uber.
765 01:04:59 Yeah, that's an Eastern. You can tell by his fangs in the front.
766 01:05:02 Ain't Bloods and Crips. It's the Valley. They cross-pollinate.
767 01:05:04 No, these vamps would never choose to live together.
768 01:05:08 Ubers are solo-nesters.
769 01:05:09 Spiders cohabitate, but never with Easterns and Southerns.
770 01:05:12 -They'd steal their food. -Listen to this kid. Huh?
771 01:05:14 This joker reads a few books, he thinks he knows more than the pros.
772 01:05:17 No, no, wait, wait, wait.
773 01:05:18 Kid makes a good point.
774 01:05:22 But I'm outta time. I gotta go pick up the little one. Come on.
775 01:05:24 Pull these fangs. And why don't you go to the bathroom and dry off your dick.
776 01:05:36 You okay?
777 01:05:39 I don't know.
778 01:05:41 I just keep thinking about how all those vampires we just killed
779 01:05:44 used to be regular people.
780 01:05:47 There you go.
781 01:05:48 The old vampires-are-just-like-us routine.
782 01:05:52 But they're not, Seth.
783 01:05:54 You know what I see when I see a vamp? Big old dollar signs.
784 01:05:58 'Cause all they are is murderers and liars.
785 01:06:01 It ain't Brad Pitt in a leather jacket and some blood raves.
786 01:06:04 It's not Eclipse. It's not New Moon. It's not Breaking Dawn Part One.
787 01:06:09 It ain't like that, all right?
788 01:06:10 Why do you know the names to all the specific Twilight films?
789 01:06:13 What's your gripe with Breaking Dawn Part 2?
790 01:06:15 It's the exciting conclusion of the whole Twilight Saga.
791 01:06:20 Bella has her baby now. It's insane.
792 01:06:23 -She had the baby? -Oh, I wish I was you!
793 01:06:26 To experience that the first time. You're in for a treat.
794 01:06:28 My daughter hipped me to all that. I don't really get into all that.
795 01:06:33 But you got something different, Seth.
796 01:06:34 You're tougher than you think you are.
797 01:06:38 No.
798 01:06:39 I'm serious.
799 01:06:40 You're just saying that so I don't report you to Seeger.
800 01:06:42 No, I'm not. You got what it takes. I'm telling you. You have that instinct.
801 01:06:46 You could be a real hunter out here.
802 01:06:48 Telling you right now.
803 01:06:50 Fuck Carol.
804 01:06:52 Fuck accounting.
805 01:06:54 You could do this.
806 01:07:06 -Hey. Hey! -Hi, Dad!
807 01:07:08 -Dad? What happened to "Daddy"? -Little kids say, "Daddy."
808 01:07:11 Oh, is that right? "Dad," huh?
809 01:07:14 Everything's changing around here.
810 01:07:18 You're late. Again.
811 01:07:20 So, what is all this?
812 01:07:21 Well, I can't actually sell the house without putting it on the market.
813 01:07:26 Yeah. Last I checked, it's three days until Monday.
814 01:07:28 Come on, Dad. We're gonna be late to the party.
815 01:07:31 You know, I was thinking, what if we don't go?
816 01:07:34 What if we stay here at the house and eat pizza, some ice cream--
817 01:07:37 Bud. No. She's been talking about this all week. You promised.
818 01:07:41 Yeah, well, I just didn't think it was the right time right now.
819 01:07:45 What? Okay, give me a reason why.
820 01:07:49 Right. So, Daddy was just kidding. He was just being weird.
821 01:07:52 -Yeah. -Yeah, you guys are going to a party!
822 01:07:55 -Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. -See, Daddy was just being strange.
823 01:07:58 -Strange, yeah. -Yeah.
824 01:08:00 -Come on. -Bye.
825 01:08:01 -Bye, baby. -Bye.
826 01:08:10 -Cake time, baby. I'll check on the kids. -All right.
827 01:08:19 Hello?
828 01:08:20 I've been looking for you, Bud.
829 01:08:23 Who is this?
830 01:08:24 Troy spoke so highly of you.
831 01:08:26 Your name was the last thing on his lips when he died.
832 01:08:30 You know how this ends, don't you?
833 01:08:32 You tell me.
834 01:08:33 With you on your knees in front of me,
835 01:08:36 begging for the lives of your wife and your daughter.
836 01:08:39 You took something from me, and now I'm gonna take everything from you.
837 01:08:43 Enjoy the party.
838 01:08:56 Nice. Ha ha. That's so nice. We gotta go, baby.
839 01:09:00 That's so nice. -Happy birthday. -Bye, Paige.
840 01:09:02 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
841 01:09:05 Up, up, up.
842 01:09:06 Look, buckle yourself in, okay?
843 01:09:09 Look, in here, all right. Now let's put your headphones on, okay?
844 01:09:12 Got your iPad right here. Now listen. Dad's gonna be driving.
845 01:09:15 You might feel a little swerving, but that's just my special driving.
846 01:10:50 Just pick up, pick up, pick up.
847 01:10:51 Can't talk. Meeting a realtor.
848 01:10:52 -Don't hang up! -Why? Is Paige okay?
849 01:10:57 Look, Joss, we're in trouble, okay? All of us.
850 01:11:03 What? What are you talking about? There's a lot I need to tell you.
851 01:11:06 I know you've had trouble trusting me in the past.
852 01:11:09 I know you think I keep things from you, but right now, you gotta trust me.
853 01:11:12 -I don't want to lose either of you. -Now you're freaking me out.
854 01:11:16 Pack your bags, be ready to go, and I will explain everything, okay?
855 01:11:19 -A bag?
856 01:11:20 All right.
857 01:11:21 Hey. You took your headphones off, huh?
858 01:11:23 I already won my race. Besides, looks like you can use my help.
859 01:11:28 Uh, you're not wrong on that.
860 01:11:29 Light!
861 01:11:46 Car!
862 01:11:50 Thank you!
863 01:12:40 All right, big jump. Big jump!
864 01:12:45 There's a guy on the right!
865 01:12:59 Hold on.
866 01:13:13 Cover your ears, sweetie.
867 01:13:40 That was awesome.
868 01:13:42 Yeah? Just don't tell your mother.
869 01:13:53 Come on. Let's go. Come on. Come on. Let's go.
870 01:13:56 Come on. All right. Come on. Let's run.
871 01:13:58 -You ever heard of Jackie Joyner-Kersee? -Uh, no.
872 01:14:01 -I'll show her to you. -Okay.
873 01:14:06 -No! No! No!
874 01:14:09 No!
875 01:14:13 No, no, no! Stop!
876 01:14:17 Hola, Bud.
877 01:14:18 I told you you'd be on your knees begging for their lives.
878 01:14:21 It's okay. It's okay.
879 01:14:22 So beg.
880 01:14:23 -Go to hell. -Oh, your compadre said the same thing.
881 01:14:27 Oh shit. Baby, I'm sorry.
882 01:14:30 I'm sorry for this, Joss. Are you okay?
883 01:14:32 Yeah.
884 01:14:33 What is happening, Bud?
885 01:14:35 I could try to explain it right now, but it's not gonna make any sense.
886 01:14:39 -But-- -But what?
887 01:14:42 I'm not exactly a pool cleaner.
888 01:14:45 Well, then, what are you?
889 01:14:50 hunt vampires.
890 01:14:53 -What? -Yeah. I hunt vampires.
891 01:14:56 -Vampires? -Yeah. That's what I do.
892 01:14:59 -Vampires? -Yeah.
893 01:15:06 Come on, man.
894 01:15:07 The reason I'm separated from the man I love is vampires? Ow!
895 01:15:10 Stop choking her like that!
896 01:15:12 Come on, Bud. We said we were gonna be honest with each other.
897 01:15:15 We are.
898 01:15:21 I wanted to tell you. I just didn't know how.
899 01:15:29 Uh, what do you want?
900 01:15:30 What do I want?
901 01:15:32 You and your daughter.
902 01:15:35 -They're not a part of this! -Pendejo, you made them a part of it!
903 01:15:42 -Don't touch me! -Don't touch her!
904 01:15:43 I'm not afraid of you.
905 01:15:45 Such a brave muñeca.
906 01:15:47 Take them.
907 01:15:48 -No! No! -No, don't touch her!
908 01:15:50 -Leave her alone! Get your hands off her! -Don't touch her!
909 01:15:53 I'll come get you! -Daddy!
910 01:15:58 A new day is dawning, and your little girl's gonna be a part of it.
911 01:16:06 First, I'm gonna turn her, and then I'm gonna watch as she drinks your wife.
912 01:16:13 I wish you could be there to see it,
913 01:16:15 but I'm afraid someone's having you for dinner.
914 01:16:38 Daddy!
915 01:16:48 Oh, I'm alive.
916 01:16:51 Oh, Bud.
917 01:16:54 Oh, I feel weird.
918 01:16:58 What happened to me?
919 01:16:59 Just some bullshit. You know how shit go.
920 01:17:07 Check my teeth?
921 01:17:08 Yeah, just check them. There's a mirror over there.
922 01:17:14 Oh! Oh no!
923 01:17:16 Oh no. Oh, that's not good.
924 01:17:19 -What! That was totally involuntary. -It's like a hiccup, probably.
925 01:17:23 -I'm sorry, man, it was all my fault.
926 01:17:26 How you feel?
927 01:17:28 Pretty horrified about the fact that I'm a vampire.
928 01:17:32 -I don't know, kind of amazing. -Yeah, like--
929 01:17:37 Like you had, like, a lot of energy drinks.
930 01:17:40 Oh, I can smell everything!
931 01:17:43 Oh God, did I shit myself this time?
932 01:17:46 No, no, no, you look fine.
933 01:17:47 -Is there like a mark? -No, you look good.
934 01:17:49 Everything looks great.
935 01:17:51 Listen, let's just take it easy.
936 01:17:52 -We're gonna work this out.
937 01:17:59 hungry!
938 01:18:05 Goddamn it, Seth.
939 01:18:10 I'm sorry, kid.
940 01:18:11 I'm actually gonna miss you, man, you know?
941 01:18:13 It's crazy how you get attached to someone.
942 01:18:16 Oh shit.
943 01:18:20 Bud?
944 01:18:22 You cut my head off. I thought we were friends.
945 01:18:28 It's just reaction. That's what I do.
946 01:18:35 You don't walk up on Tyson either.
947 01:18:37 Friendship is complicated, huh?
948 01:18:39 Yeah, friendships are complicated.
949 01:18:43 All right, wait. Follow my voice. Left, there. Yep, okay.
950 01:18:46 Easy. No. Okay, easy, easy.
951 01:18:49 Okay, here we go.
952 01:18:51 The fuck?
953 01:18:52 Okay, gentle. Gentle.
954 01:18:58 Huh. Still fits.
955 01:19:05 Oh, it's been quite the week.
956 01:19:07 Yeah, it has. You good?
957 01:19:10 -How do I look? -You look all right.
958 01:19:12 -You feel all right? -You swear?
959 01:19:14 -Yeah.
960 01:19:16 -Hey! -Sorry. Just kidding.
961 01:19:17 -Okay. All right. -Too soon. Too soon. All right.
962 01:19:22 Hey, I'm sorry I tried to eat you.
963 01:19:23 How 'bout we not report this to Seeger until Monday?
964 01:19:26 Seeger, shit. Oh, what? You don't think he's gonna notice?
965 01:19:30 What, am I just supposed to wear turtlenecks from now on?
966 01:19:33 I mean, I do look good in a T-neck, but that's not sustainable.
967 01:19:38 -Wait. Where are we going? -Going to get my family back.
968 01:19:41 I have to stop at my place and get some information.
969 01:19:43 What's going on with your neck? Is it repairing itself?
970 01:19:47 I actually think it is.
971 01:19:48 Okay, just be careful. Don't go over any speed bumps.
972 01:19:53 Damn. Damn.
973 01:19:55 My bad.
974 01:20:02 You have a driving problem. You know that, right?
975 01:20:05 I gotta go to apartment 19.
976 01:20:07 I'll be back in five.
977 01:20:16 Heather, you just moved in. Leaving so soon?
978 01:20:18 Bud, just listen to me.
979 01:20:22 Look, we need to talk.
980 01:20:24 Talk? Vampires kidnapped my family. You wanna talk?
981 01:20:27 -I didn't have a choice. -I don't give a rat's ass.
982 01:20:40 This is stupid, Bud. Let me at least explain.
983 01:20:48 Okay, listen.
984 01:20:50 Because of you, my family got kidnapped, and my friend is dead.
985 01:20:54 Or undead.
986 01:20:59 That's what she does, Bud.
987 01:21:01 -She turns people against their will.
988 01:21:07 You think I wanna work for a monster like her?
989 01:21:09 Then why do you?
990 01:21:15 -She's my maker, okay? -What?
991 01:21:17 And an Uber Vamp.
992 01:21:18 Look, she forced me to get close to you.
993 01:21:20 She wanted to get back at you for what you did to her. What you talking about?
994 01:21:28 Why?
995 01:21:33 So, you just gonna light your finger on fire, huh?
996 01:21:44 You killed a vampire Monday, didn't you?
997 01:21:46 -Sweet old lady? -Not so sweet, actually.
998 01:21:48 That was Audrey's daughter.
999 01:21:52 Daughter? How?
1000 01:21:54 When she came over, she had a little girl she had to leave behind.
1001 01:21:57 So by the time they went back, found her, and turned her, she was old.
1002 01:22:01 -And I killed her. -And you killed her.
1003 01:22:03 And now they got Paige and Jocelyn.
1004 01:22:05 I'm sorry.
1005 01:22:07 -Hey, Bud. I don't feel so good.
1006 01:22:11 Could you hold my head for a little?
1007 01:22:16 Holy shit.
1008 01:22:23 You're walking on sacred ground. You should be honored.
1009 01:22:27 Where are you taking us?
1010 01:22:28 -Why, are you frightened? -No.
1011 01:22:31 You should be.
1012 01:22:32 Well, then you don't know me that well, bitch. Ah!
1013 01:22:36 Why are you doing this?
1014 01:22:38 Paige, don't talk to her.
1015 01:22:39 She has a right to know.
1016 01:22:41 You don't get to decide--
1017 01:22:46 I had a daughter once, feisty like you.
1018 01:22:50 I wanted to make a better world for her.
1019 01:22:52 A world where she could be free from hiding.
1020 01:22:56 But your father took that away from me.
1021 01:22:58 Now, you see, it's only fair I take you away from him.
1022 01:23:01 -If you hurt her, I'll kill you.
1023 01:23:04 But I'm already dead.
1024 01:23:08 I'm not gonna hurt her, Ms. Jablonski.
1025 01:23:10 I'm gonna make sure no one can ever hurt her again.
1026 01:23:13 -You should thank me.
1027 01:23:14 A war is coming,
1028 01:23:16 and your little girl's gonna be on the winning side.
1029 01:23:20 -No! -Paige!
1030 01:23:23 Let me go!
1031 01:23:25 No. No!
1032 01:23:35 -Come on.
1033 01:23:39 -Seth, hold your head still.
1034 01:23:41 Looks like they've turned him with Uber blood, so he'll be unpredictable for a while.
1035 01:23:45 He'll get under control eventually.
1036 01:23:50 Here.
1037 01:23:51 No, I'm pescatarian.
1038 01:23:53 Come on.
1039 01:23:56 There we go.
1040 01:23:59 You hunters are always complaining about LA running dry.
1041 01:24:02 That's what Audrey's trying to change.
1042 01:24:04 It's, like, sweet but a little tangy.
1043 01:24:06 That's nice. Oh yeah, get inside of me.
1044 01:24:08 She uses her cover as a realtor to buy properties all over the Valley
1045 01:24:12 and move vamps back in amongst the rest of us.
1046 01:24:14 Within a year, all vamp activity in LA
1047 01:24:16 will be traceable to her sitting at the top.
1048 01:24:18 Not if I get to her first.
1049 01:24:21 I'll lead the way.
1050 01:24:22 -All right, I'm coming too. -No, no, no. No. Hell no, Seth.
1051 01:24:24 You got too much energy now. You fresh off some blood.
1052 01:24:27 I don't want you to switch up on me, try to bite my kidneys out.
1053 01:24:29 No, Bud, listen. They tortured me.
1054 01:24:31 Okay, they drank my blood. They cut my head off.
1055 01:24:35 I guess technically, you cut my head off, but they turned me into this, okay?
1056 01:24:39 -I want to help take her down. -Okay.
1057 01:24:41 We'll get you changed, head back to my spot, and we'll gear up.
1058 01:24:44 -Oh, right now? -Yeah, right now.
1059 01:24:46 What? It's dark out.
1060 01:24:47 That's a suicide mission.
1061 01:24:50 Welcome to the motherfucking night shift.
1062 01:25:21 Oh shit!
1063 01:25:22 -Ah! Oh, they got me! -Look, Seth, calm down!
1064 01:25:26 They're expecting humans. It's lead. It can't hurt you.
1065 01:25:28 -Really? -Yes. But, hey, let it make you mad.
1066 01:26:32 You okay?
1067 01:26:35 This one actually hurts. Shit. Ah! Ah!
1068 01:26:48 Bud, what do we do? We're surrounded.
1069 01:27:13 Black Cowboy.
1070 01:27:18 Get down.
1071 01:27:42 How the hell you get here?
1072 01:27:44 The snowflake.
1073 01:27:46 I might have texted him.
1074 01:27:48 -Welcome to the fucking Union, brother. -Thank you.
1075 01:27:50 -Hey, hey, if you don't get your ass off-- -Oh. Sorry.
1076 01:27:53 -This way. -Sorry.
1077 01:27:54 Come on, Big J.
1078 01:27:55 After you.
1079 01:28:05 Bud, in the back, look for the staircase. That's the entrance to her tunnel.
1080 01:28:09 Keep going down, and you'll find her.
1081 01:28:11 There's a faster way down, but you wouldn't survive it.
1082 01:28:13 We survive everything. See me fighting a bear, you pour honey on me.
1083 01:28:17 You two go ahead. We'll catch up.
1084 01:28:23 Come on. Let's get cracking.
1085 01:28:56 Just like old times.
1086 01:28:58 I'm out.
1087 01:29:01 Look at this shit here. Jackpot.
1088 01:29:03 Man, look at all this gear.
1089 01:29:06 Okay.
1090 01:29:10 Ugh. Shit, look at this. All this sunscreen.
1091 01:29:13 Vamps runnin' around in the day. She could take over the Valley.
1092 01:29:19 Handle him, J!
1093 01:29:21 Okay.
1094 01:29:22 -Oh shit.
1095 01:29:24 I see you. He didn't know, did he?
1096 01:29:27 He didn't know.
1097 01:29:29 -Whoo! Get him, J.
1098 01:29:34 Stay down, fool.
1099 01:29:35 Yo. You did that without even stretching, huh?
1100 01:29:40 That was my weak leg.
1101 01:29:42 See all this? Huh?
1102 01:29:45 All these guns?
1103 01:29:47 Check it out. Silver-tipped wooden bullets. Vampire killers.
1104 01:29:50 What's that about?
1105 01:29:53 Is she El Jefe?
1106 01:29:54 Nah. El Jefe is bigger than this, brother.
1107 01:29:56 But, either way, that bitch got an ass-whooping coming.
1108 01:30:00 Yeah.
1109 01:30:14 Yeah, they down here.
1110 01:30:18 Let's get cracking.
1111 01:30:19 Just like old times.
1112 01:30:26 He's coming.
1113 01:30:27 I can smell him.
1114 01:30:30 I don't know how all this works, but I know my husband,
1115 01:30:34 and he's gonna murder you.
1116 01:30:36 -Ex-husband. -See, now you're just being a bitch.
1117 01:30:39 Bring him to me.
1118 01:30:42 Paige.
1119 01:30:52 -This place ain't creepy at all. -Tell me about it.
1120 01:30:56 Here we go.
1121 01:31:29 Bud!
1122 01:31:55 John!
1123 01:32:13 That's how we do, baby.
1124 01:32:15 You know how we do. We bag 'em, and we tag 'em.
1125 01:32:18 That's how we get it done.
1126 01:32:20 -What's going on with you?
1127 01:32:21 Ain't nothing going on. Ain't nothing wrong with me, man.
1128 01:32:24 -You all right? -Shit. You know they can't fuck with me.
1129 01:32:27 Okay, but why you leaning like that?
1130 01:32:28 We been battle-tested. This don't mean nothing.
1131 01:32:31 -All right. -Nothing but a flesh wound, dog.
1132 01:32:33 Okay. Still, it don't look too good. Come on, let's get up out of here.
1133 01:32:37 Come on. We ain't got much time. Gotta get you out of here. Come on, man.
1134 01:32:46 -Big John, what the hell is you doing? -I'm saving your Black ass.
1135 01:32:48 What are you talking about?
1136 01:32:50 Go get your family right now. I got this.
1137 01:32:52 -We can't do it like this. -You know I work alone.
1138 01:32:56 -You crazy motherfucker. -Go.
1139 01:32:57 -You better stay alive. -Go!
1140 01:33:00 I'll be here waiting for you!
1141 01:33:07 All right, motherfuckers, come on!
1142 01:33:51 West side for life!
1143 01:34:07 I'm not supposed to kill you yet, but you've been a real pain in the ass,
1144 01:34:12 so give me one good reason.
1145 01:34:13 Burn in hell.
1146 01:34:15 Good enough.
1147 01:34:34 -You're working on that landing, huh? -No, I planned it like that.
1148 01:34:37 Go, we've got him.
1149 01:35:03 -No!
1150 01:35:07 Paige! Stay back.
1151 01:35:09 Daddy!
1152 01:35:11 -Joss, you okay? -Yeah.
1153 01:35:13 All right. I'll let you go.
1154 01:35:16 A life for a life or whatever the hell you have.
1155 01:35:22 You took my daughter, Jablonski.
1156 01:35:25 -I'm just returning the favor. -No.
1157 01:35:28 -Mommy! -Baby!
1158 01:35:33 What do you think, muñeca?
1159 01:35:35 I'm gonna kill your daddy, then I'm gonna make you drink your mean old mommy,
1160 01:35:38 and then I'm gonna be your new, improved mommy.
1161 01:35:43 -How does that sound?
1162 01:35:45 I hate you!
1163 01:35:46 That's not very nice.
1164 01:35:48 I hate you too.
1165 01:36:01 Daddy!
1166 01:36:41 I should've just got another job.
1167 01:36:46 -Baby, get up! -Come on, Daddy, get up!
1168 01:36:49 Baby, I'm trying.
1169 01:36:50 -Try harder. -Oh, okay.
1170 01:37:09 In the end, the devil comes for everyone.
1171 01:37:17 That's what you get.
1172 01:37:19 Bitch.
1173 01:37:21 No!
1174 01:37:23 Mommy!
1175 01:37:34 Pull!
1176 01:38:01 Wood to the heart, silver to the neck.
1177 01:38:33 No!
1178 01:38:49 Fucking pool boy.
1179 01:38:51 The best.
1180 01:38:57 Y'all good?
1181 01:39:02 Works every time.
1182 01:39:03 Let's go.
1183 01:39:09 Come on, babe. Let's go.
1184 01:39:12 All right.
1185 01:39:15 -Hey. Where's Seth? -Hey.
1186 01:39:17 -Whoa! -No, no, no. Babe, babe, no.
1187 01:39:20 They're the good vampires.
1188 01:39:21 That's my girl Heather. That's my guy Seth.
1189 01:39:24 -Hey.
1190 01:39:25 Whose arm is that?
1191 01:39:28 Oh. Sorry.
1192 01:39:34 That's big money right there.
1193 01:39:35 -Guess what? -What's that?
1194 01:39:37 I didn't pee myself this time.
1195 01:39:39 -Get out. -Vampires don't pee or poop.
1196 01:39:41 Nah, they don't.
1197 01:39:43 -Please let me have this little victory. -Of course you can. C'mon. Let's go.
1198 01:39:49 Do they really not pee or poop?
1199 01:39:51 -Does that mean they're full of shit? -Language!
1200 01:40:02 Big John.
1201 01:40:03 I'll miss you, baby.
1202 01:40:13 Oh, no.
1203 01:40:16 It's got good energy in that.
1204 01:40:21 All right.
1205 01:40:22 We were hiding right over there. Right over there.
1206 01:40:25 Jablonski!
1207 01:40:27 Seeger? What the hell you doing, walking all fast like that?
1208 01:40:31 New shoe boots on.
1209 01:40:33 And you. What are you, sick?
1210 01:40:38 -Uh, pink eye. -What?
1211 01:40:39 It's when poo particles get in your eye.
1212 01:40:42 Where's Big John?
1213 01:40:47 Oh goddamn it!
1214 01:40:50 I did you a solid.
1215 01:40:52 But now you have graciously returned the favor
1216 01:40:55 because after the shit you pulled here tonight,
1217 01:40:58 I'll never have to deal with you again.
1218 01:41:01 For starters,
1219 01:41:03 flagrantly violating code 682, operating outside of your shift.
1220 01:41:07 Actually, sir, if I may.
1221 01:41:09 Code 741 states that, "If a hunter is in a 911 situation,
1222 01:41:12 he may circumvent normal operating hours
1223 01:41:14 so long as he notifies the Union before entering," which he did.
1224 01:41:18 Thank you. Thank you for that.
1225 01:41:20 There's also code 584, unlawful termination of familiars
1226 01:41:23 without prior authorization.
1227 01:41:25 Yes, sir, that is correct, but Section 4 states,
1228 01:41:28 "When fired on, a hunter is lawfully allowed to return fire,"
1229 01:41:31 which is what happened here.
1230 01:41:33 Code 424, "A Union hunter must make all reasonable efforts
1231 01:41:37 to limit collateral damage to property while engaging in a hunt."
1232 01:41:41 Boom!
1233 01:41:42 -Sir, code 42-- -I got this.
1234 01:41:44 Code 424 was rescinded by the national office in January.
1235 01:41:49 Boom. Boom.
1236 01:41:51 -Someone's been reading. -Saw it in the newsletter.
1237 01:41:54 Yeah. I see what's going on here.
1238 01:41:57 Loopholes.
1239 01:41:59 Think you're smarter than me?
1240 01:42:01 Then you can probably spell "traitor."
1241 01:42:06 Sure.
1242 01:42:06 T-R-A-I-T-O-R. What was the point of that?
1243 01:42:13 Carol's keeping her fucking desk.
1244 01:42:16 Good! She can have it.
1245 01:42:18 I'm a field man now! Mowing down vamps with my best friend Bud.
1246 01:42:25 -That felt good. -You did that.
1247 01:42:27 Wait. Shit. What are you gonna do about the money?
1248 01:42:30 -Oh, I'm good.
1249 01:42:32 Think I'm gonna be all right.
1250 01:42:36 fuck Carol.
1251 01:42:38 Hey, should I drink Carol?
1252 01:42:39 No, no, that's a lot of cholesterol. Right, okay.
1253 01:42:42 I won't go out of my way, but if, like, there's a chance encounter
1254 01:42:46 -Yeah. Later. -See you, guys!
1255 01:42:48 -Bye. -See you, guys.
1256 01:42:51 What about us?
1257 01:42:53 What about us?
1258 01:42:54 I was thinking, what if we tried this whole, you know,
1259 01:42:57 stay on the same groove type thing.
1260 01:42:59 You know, me cooking breakfast. You know?
1261 01:43:01 How about we take it one day at a time, but no more lies.
1262 01:43:05 After what we've seen tonight, there is no reason to lie.
1263 01:43:08 So I ask you a question, and you give me a straight answer.
1264 01:43:12 I can live under those terms, you know. Okay.
1265 01:43:16 Yeah, I don't think we're there yet.
1266 01:43:19 Mm-hmm. You just gonna leave me like this?
1267 01:43:26 Mmm. Jump back, want to kiss myself.
1268 01:43:29 I'm gonna be a vampire hunter too.
1269 01:43:32 -No. -No.
1270 01:43:34 -Daddy, why do you call me Pickle? -Because that's what you are, baby.
1271 01:43:38 Sometimes you're a sweet pickle, sometimes you're a sour pickle,
1272 01:43:41 and sometimes you're a salty pickle.
1273 01:43:43 I love you, Daddy.
1274 01:44:01 That's what I love about LA.
1275 01:44:03 All the damn vampires.
