神采飞扬 Career Opportunities(1991)(EN)Subtitles
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1 00:00:52 That wasn't a store robbery.
2 00:00:55 That was an assassination.
3 00:00:58 That wasn't a clerk. That was a wise guy.
4 00:01:01 How do I know?
5 00:01:04 I spent a little time with the FBI's organized crime unit.
6 00:01:08 I guess you could say that I'm intimately knowledgeable
7 00:01:10 with the seedy and rancorous workings of the mob
8 00:01:13 in the Midwest section of this country.
9 00:01:15 I know a gangland slaying when I see one,
10 00:01:17 and that's exactly what this baby is.
11 00:01:19 I'd look into it myself personally,
12 00:01:21 but I got a date tonight.
13 00:01:24 Think I'll take the private jet out and fly to Spain,
14 00:01:27 pick up the little lady,
15 00:01:29 do the subsonic tummy bump at 30,000 feet
16 00:01:31 then glide back into the U.S. of A. By dawn.
17 00:01:34 I know what you're gonna Say, "Jim... Jim Dodge, settle down."
18 00:01:39 "Relax. You owe it to yourself."
19 00:01:41 I'll tell you what I tell everybody.
20 00:01:43 Any little Fraulein that expects anything more from me
21 00:01:47 than a little bit of pleasure and a little bit of danger
22 00:01:50 and a great set of pectorals,
23 00:01:51 She's looking for a fall right on her ass.
24 00:01:57 Hubie, Hubie, Hubie, Hubie!
25 00:02:00 Come here! Let me tell you something.
26 00:02:02 If you Know what's good for you, don't you ever come back!
27 00:02:05 Wait a minute, You're not gonna find someone who has the relationship
28 00:02:09 With those animals that I do.
29 00:02:11 Listen to the dogs, Hubie. They love me!
30 00:02:16 It all started when I was 15.
31 00:02:18 That's when I invented the artificial cow heart.
32 00:02:22 Oh, that was a big thing.
33 00:02:25 A little before your time, but, uh, it made the newspaper.
34 00:02:28 ABC, NBC, CBS, they picked up on it,
35 00:02:31 But it's more or less a hobby for me, boys.
36 00:02:35 Scoot over!
37 00:02:37 Actually,
38 00:02:41 today I decided that I've gone just about as far I can go
39 00:02:44 in the animal health-care business.
40 00:02:47 But to answer your question, the reason that I'm not at work this afternoon
41 00:02:50 is because I was made an offer I cannot refuse.
42 00:02:53 I sold.
43 00:02:54 Whatcha gonna do with the cash, Jim?
44 00:02:56 I don't know, maybe I'll invest it overseas.
45 00:02:58 I've got some projects in Eastern Europe right now.
46 00:03:00 I don't know. I've got everything a man needs.
47 00:03:02 Jim, you just bought the animal hospital.
48 00:03:05 How come you sold it so fast?
49 00:03:10 Tax problem.
50 00:03:12 And here's my accountant right now.
51 00:03:15 Earl, take a bow. Ha-ha-ha!
52 00:03:17 Twenty minutes for lunch, Earl, OK?
53 00:03:19 Go buy another suit.
54 00:03:20 He works for me.
55 00:03:22 He's scouting some real estate for me, right now.
56 00:03:24 Yeah, but the market's real tight.
57 00:03:30 I like the new uniform, Lorraine.
58 00:03:34 You know, with the right shoes and handbag,
59 00:03:37 that might be suitable for a cocktail party.
60 00:03:39 So... Question.
61 00:03:42 When in the world are you going to start serving sashimi?
62 00:03:45 Maybe when I find out what it is.
63 00:03:49 You've never heard of sashimi?
64 00:03:52 You've got to be kidding.
65 00:03:55 It's this special Japanese fish you eat raw.
66 00:03:58 A little butter sauce,
67 00:04:00 And you're ready to go to heaven.
68 00:04:02 I'd hire you in a minute
69 00:04:04 if I hadn't already fired you so many times.
70 00:04:07 Did you ever think of leaving town?
71 00:04:12 Thousands of people over in St. Louis
72 00:04:15 got no idea how full of shit you are.
73 00:04:20 You've been alive for 21 years, my friend.
74 00:04:23 Plenty of time for most people
75 00:04:26 to find a place for themselves.
76 00:04:29 Well, I'm not like everybody else.
77 00:04:33 Yeah, that's for sure.
78 00:04:39 How about if I...
79 00:04:41 I work for you for free?
80 00:04:46 No.
81 00:04:48 I'm afraid not, Jimmy.
82 00:04:51 Think about St. Louis.
83 00:04:56 Hey, Josie. Hi.
84 00:04:57 - Fill her up? - Fill her up.
85 00:05:19 How you doin鈥?
86 00:05:37 You got fired again, didn't you?
87 00:05:39 Dad. Didn't ya?
88 00:05:41 Who told you that?
89 00:05:42 Hubie Marshall called me at work.
90 00:05:45 He called you at work?
91 00:05:47 That's it. I'm gonna... What'd he say?
92 00:05:51 He said he fired ya!
93 00:05:54 He said that? And you believed him?
94 00:05:56 Damn straight I do!
95 00:05:57 With all due respect, Dad, you're Mr. Gullible sometimes.
96 00:06:03 The truth of the matter is, Dad, I resigned.
97 00:06:06 I'll tell you something else. Shut up, Jimmy!
98 00:06:08 When I took the job,
99 00:06:10 I had no idea it was gonna be a hire/fire situation.
100 00:06:13 Luther Betenhauser's boy is doing better.
101 00:06:16 What's wrong with him鈥? Fell off his grandfather's silo.
102 00:06:18 - He's got brain damage. - He does not.
103 00:06:21 He does too.
104 00:06:22 Hoover Fey says his tongue's gonna hang out the side of his mouth
105 00:06:25 for the rest of his life.
106 00:06:26 And when he dies and they bury him,
107 00:06:28 At the funeral they're gonna put a mask on him.
108 00:06:30 Do I have to listen to this while I'm eating?
109 00:06:34 Let's talk about something else.
110 00:06:41 Josie McClellan moved to New York.
111 00:06:43 She did not. I saw her today.
112 00:06:46 Well, I don't know how you could.
113 00:06:48 I heard at the bank that she got tired of taking care of her father,
114 00:06:51 And she told him to jump in a lake,
115 00:06:53 And then she left for New York to get her MBA
116 00:06:55 in high-fashion design at the university of New York city.
117 00:06:59 I just saw her down at the gas station in living color.
118 00:07:02 We had a cup of Java together.
119 00:07:05 I'm gonna take Lou Selby's word over yours any day.
120 00:07:09 Lou Selby's a drunk.
121 00:07:13 You know, for a guy who's just lost his umpteenth job,
122 00:07:16 You sure are handy with the tongue sword.
123 00:07:17 You got canned again?
124 00:07:19 Well, he didn't get canned.
125 00:07:23 He got fired.
126 00:07:25 That's gotta be some kind of a record.
127 00:07:31 Not only are you an obnoxious slug,
128 00:07:33 but you're a freeloading obnoxious slug.
129 00:07:36 You should talk.
130 00:07:38 What are you in your mid-forties, still living at home?
131 00:07:42 I'm 24, and I pay rent.
132 00:07:45 So do I.
133 00:07:46 You did pay rent.
134 00:07:48 Dad, you mean you're cutting my rent?
135 00:07:51 Hell, no!
136 00:07:54 You're not paying rent 鈥榗ause you don't have a job or any money.
137 00:07:57 You're out of school and you live in this house, you pay rent!
138 00:08:05 鈾?I wanna stay home 鈾?
139 00:08:10 鈾?I wanna stay home right here 鈾?
140 00:08:14 鈾?I wanna stay home today 鈾?
141 00:08:19 Jim! Yo, Jim!
142 00:08:22 Jim, wake up!
143 00:08:23 Hey, get up!
144 00:08:28 Get up!
145 00:08:29 鈾?It's only 6:00 鈾?
146 00:08:32 鈾?When my day begins 鈾?
147 00:08:35 You know, getting this job,
148 00:08:38 restoring your faith and pride in me is a number one priority now, Dad.
149 00:08:42 Priority ought to be making something of yourself.
150 00:08:46 That's right up there.
151 00:08:47 When I was your age, I couldn't wait to get out of my folks house.
152 00:08:53 I love living at home.
153 00:09:06 I don't think this is such a great place for me to work, Dad.
154 00:09:12 OK,
155 00:09:13 say I don't get this job, hypothetically.
156 00:09:17 Are you gonna be upset?
157 00:09:19 You don't get this job, you're on a bus to St. Louis.
158 00:09:22 St. Louis?
159 00:09:24 Uncle Jeff's offered you work in his garden shop.
160 00:09:26 I don't know anything about gardening.
161 00:09:28 You will learn!
162 00:09:31 I'm getting a distinct feeling that you want me out of your life.
163 00:09:34 I don't want you out of my life. I want you out of my house.
164 00:09:39 Wow. Out!
165 00:09:41 OK, OK, OK.
166 00:09:59 Are you sure I can't offer you a coffee and a bear claw?
167 00:10:01 No, thank.
168 00:10:03 They're good, they're fresh.
169 00:10:05 No, I'm fine.
170 00:10:06 You don't want one, and I don't need one.
171 00:10:10 Right! I love the darn things, though.
172 00:10:12 I got a sweet tooth,
173 00:10:14 I could eat those things by the dozen.
174 00:10:15 By the looks of it, I have.
175 00:10:16 Right.
176 00:10:19 I tell ya, I'm so excited that you're considering
177 00:10:22 joining the Target team. We all are.
178 00:10:26 I appreciate that.
179 00:10:28 Good, then let's cut right to the chase, shall we?
180 00:10:32 We're prepared to offer you $42,500 a year
181 00:10:36 with a full benefit package.
182 00:10:39 That's dental, medical, Profit sharing, pension,
183 00:10:43 expense account, car allowance,
184 00:10:46 vacation, of course,
185 00:10:48 and any and all relocating expenses.
186 00:10:51 This ts our first, best, and last offer.
187 00:10:55 What do you think?
188 00:10:57 Well... Um, C.D., with all due respect,
189 00:11:01 I came in here with the number 45 in my mind, and...
190 00:11:24 Hmm.
191 00:11:29 You've got me.
192 00:11:32 Forty-five it is.
193 00:11:35 Welcome aboard. Thank you.
194 00:11:38 I'd like to buy you lunch.
195 00:11:39 No, no, no.
196 00:11:40 Your money's no good here. Lunch is mine.
197 00:11:43 I'm not going to argue.
198 00:11:44 Better not. I'm bigger than you.
199 00:11:47 Hang on a second. I told her to hold my calls.
200 00:11:50 Yeah, Peg. Uh-huh.
201 00:11:53 No, it's OK.
202 00:11:55 He's right here with me now.
203 00:11:57 Hi, Peg.
204 00:11:59 We just closed the deal. Uh-huh.
205 00:12:01 It was a slam-dunk, too. I got him for forty-five.
206 00:12:10 No, he's right here.
207 00:12:14 What do you mean he missed the plane?
208 00:12:19 Then who the hell am I talking to?
209 00:12:23 Oh, Lord!
210 00:12:27 I'll, uh... I'll get back to you.
211 00:12:31 I know a great, little Italian place
212 00:12:33 that has the best pasta primatonis in the wor...
213 00:12:36 Excuse me, a minute, will you, please?
214 00:12:38 Lovely wife you have there.
215 00:12:39 Dodge, James?
216 00:12:42 Mm-hmm.
217 00:12:45 James, I'm afraid we have a little misunderstanding.
218 00:12:48 You see, I thought you came in for the, uh...
219 00:12:51 Operations manager's job.
220 00:12:54 I have you down here as night cleanup boy.
221 00:13:00 Well, I'm a little overpaid
222 00:13:02 for night cleanup boy, wouldn't you say, C.D.?
223 00:13:06 The truth is, James, I can offer you $4.44 per hour.
224 00:13:16 Uh, four, four... $4.44...
225 00:13:18 Four dollars and forty-four cents.
226 00:13:19 What about the benefits?
227 00:13:21 Two fifteen-minute breaks and a half hour for lunch.
228 00:13:25 And the title is, uh, night cleanup boy?
229 00:13:29 Yes.
230 00:13:33 I'll take it.
231 00:13:35 Oh, and, uh, lose the curl.
232 00:13:39 Welcome to the Target team. Thank you.
233 00:13:42 So the parrot says, "Of course I can talk"
234 00:13:45 Can you fly?
235 00:13:50 I don't want any damn Japanese automobile plant in this town.
236 00:13:57 It... It means jobs.
237 00:14:00 I don't need a job.
238 00:14:02 Your governor's tryin鈥?to use my town as a political chip.
239 00:14:05 I resent that.
240 00:14:07 There could be some specific benefits for you personally.
241 00:14:15 Josie!
242 00:14:19 Yeah?
243 00:14:20 Come here.
244 00:14:21 Meet these gentlemen from the governor's office.
245 00:14:26 Come on in here, honey.
246 00:14:44 Honey, I want you to meet Bill, uh...
247 00:14:46 Uh, bob. Bob Bosenbeck.
248 00:14:53 Bob.
249 00:15:10 Dave.
250 00:15:15 My pleasure, Dave.
251 00:15:18 Right. Dave Hockner.
252 00:15:22 I don't want to interrupt your meeting.
253 00:15:25 Very nice to meet both of you.
254 00:15:27 Bye.
255 00:15:29 Bye.
256 00:15:36 Josie?
257 00:15:39 Josie!
258 00:15:48 You pull another stunt like you did today,
259 00:15:51 I'll beat the livin鈥?daylights outta you!
260 00:16:16 All right, out!
261 00:16:20 Out of here, man. Get out of here!
262 00:16:23 Get out of the car!
263 00:16:45 Right on time!
264 00:16:50 Everything's going as planned.
265 00:16:53 You ordered a limousine?
266 00:16:56 Of course.
267 00:16:58 My first day at work.
268 00:17:00 How's it gonna look if my dad drives me?
269 00:17:03 A little treat for getting the job.
270 00:17:05 It was only fifty bucks.
271 00:17:10 Right on time, Henry.
272 00:17:11 Yes, sir.
273 00:17:13 Henry, the sign... Very wrong.
274 00:17:19 Ciao!
275 00:17:28 Hey, Jim, where you going?
276 00:17:32 Hello, boys.
277 00:17:34 Going to Paris on an F-14.
278 00:17:36 Got a peace meeting with the Vice President of Bulgaria.
279 00:17:39 Business, you know? Then I'm going to Venice,
280 00:17:42 For a spaghetti dinner with the princess of Austria.
281 00:17:45 A beautiful lady. Really big bones.
282 00:17:48 Remember to brush your teeth, Melvin!
283 00:17:50 You, too, Sidney! Adios!
284 00:17:55 Jim is so cool!
285 00:18:01 鈾?Now listen to the beat Beat of the song-song 鈾?
286 00:18:03 鈾?A鈥檅uzzin' in my head-head Like a bum-dum 鈾?
287 00:18:05 鈾?Listen to the beat Beat of the song 鈾?
288 00:18:08 鈾?A鈥檅uzzin' in my head now Head like a bum-dum 鈾?
289 00:18:10 鈾?Twits and Jerks They do the boogie 鈾?
290 00:18:12 鈾?Like one big flop 鈾?
291 00:18:13 鈾?They don't know About soul wine habit club 鈾?
292 00:18:15 鈾?I sing my song And I'm a rocker 鈾?
293 00:18:17 鈾?I'm burning up With the puta's fever 鈾?
294 00:18:20 鈾?Beat beat beat Of the song song 鈾?
295 00:18:21 鈾?Buzzin鈥?in my Head head head 鈾?
296 00:18:23 鈾?Like a bum-dum 鈾?
297 00:18:24 鈾?Listen to the beat Beat of the song song 鈾?
298 00:18:26 鈾?Buzzin鈥?in my head head Like a bum-dum 鈾?
299 00:18:29 鈾?Twits and Jerks They do the boogie like 鈾?
300 00:18:31 鈾?Twits and Jerks They do the boogie like 鈾?
301 00:18:33 鈾?Twits and Jerks They do the boogie like 鈾?
302 00:18:36 鈾?King! 鈾?
303 00:18:37 鈾?Kong! 鈾?
304 00:18:38 鈾?Five! 鈾?
305 00:18:40 鈾?Beat beat of the song song 鈾?
306 00:18:42 鈾?Buzzin鈥?in my Head head head 鈾?
307 00:18:43 鈾?Like a bum-dum Listen to the beat 鈾?
308 00:18:45 鈾?Beat of the song song Buzzin' in my head 鈾?
309 00:18:47 鈾?My head like a bum-dum 鈾?
310 00:18:49 鈾?Stayin鈥?alive We're the King Kong Five 鈾?
311 00:18:51 鈾?Doin鈥?the King Kong Jive On the Gabony boogie 鈾?
312 00:18:53 鈾?Now what's the matter With me? 鈾?
313 00:18:55 鈾?I'm playing like shakin鈥?Under the coconut tree 鈾?
314 00:18:57 鈾?Beat beat of the song song 鈾?
315 00:18:59 鈾?Buzzin鈥?in my head My head like a bum-dum 鈾?
316 00:19:01 鈾?Listen to the beat beat beat Of the song song 鈾?
317 00:19:04 鈾?Buzzin鈥?in my head My head like a bum-dum 鈾?
318 00:19:06 鈾?Twits and jerks They do the boogie 鈾?
319 00:19:07 鈾?Like one big flop 鈾?
320 00:19:09 鈾?They don't know About soul wine habit club 鈾?
321 00:19:11 鈾?I sing my song And I'm a rocker 鈾?
322 00:19:13 鈾?I'm burning up With the puta's fever 鈾?
323 00:19:15 鈾?Listen to the beat Beat of the song song 鈾?
324 00:19:17 鈾?Buzzin鈥?in my head My head like a bum-dum 鈾?
325 00:19:19 鈾?Now were stayin鈥?alive We're the King Kong five 鈾?
326 00:19:22 鈾?Doin鈥?the King Kong jive On the Gabony boogie 鈾?
327 00:19:24 Bobby.
328 00:19:28 Got a loose tile here. In the morning
329 00:19:30 take care of this.
330 00:19:32 I don't need a lawsuit, OK?
331 00:19:34 I've got enough to worry about.
332 00:19:38 Who's he?
333 00:19:39 Attention shoppers.
334 00:19:41 The store will be closing in five minutes.
335 00:19:43 Bring all your purchases to the front. Thank you.
336 00:19:47 鈾?Listen to the beat Beat of the song 鈾?
337 00:19:50 鈾?Buzzin鈥?in my head My head like a bum-dum 鈾?
338 00:19:52 鈾?Twits and jerks They do the boogie 鈾?
339 00:19:53 鈾?Like one big flop 鈾?
340 00:19:55 鈾?They don't know About soul wine habit club 鈾?
341 00:19:57 鈾?I sing my song And I'm a rocker 鈾?
342 00:19:59 鈾?I'm burning up With the puta's fever 鈾?
343 00:20:05 鈾?Now listen to the beat 鈾?
344 00:20:25 Are you a slacker?
345 00:20:28 Uh, no, Presbyterian.
346 00:20:31 What did you say? What did you say?
347 00:20:33 I'm askin鈥?you a simple question.
348 00:20:35 Are you lazy?
349 00:20:36 No, sir.
350 00:20:37 The last guy that wore that uniform
351 00:20:39 Was a lazy slacker, and I fired his butt.
352 00:20:43 Uh...
353 00:20:44 About the uniform, will I be getting my own?
354 00:20:47 You work out, which I doubt,
355 00:20:50 You can have a new name patch.
356 00:20:56 Eh, uh... would I be able to have it laundered?
357 00:20:59 It smells like Darnell.
358 00:21:01 I don't think you know who you're messin鈥?with.
359 00:21:03 After you clean the ladies' and men's crappers,
360 00:21:06 You'd better be able to eat off those bowls.
361 00:21:08 Oh, sure.
362 00:21:09 You clean my coffeemaker, then wax my desk.
363 00:21:12 Uh, clean what?
364 00:21:14 Clean my coffeemaker and wax my desk!
365 00:21:17 Yes, I got it!
366 00:21:18 Sweep the aisles, startin鈥?with health and beauty.
367 00:21:20 Work your way over to juniors and misses.
368 00:21:22 Ups and downs, leaving your debris in the cross aisles.
369 00:21:25 So I start with health and beauty...
370 00:21:27 I just said to start with health and beauty!
371 00:21:30 Then you do your cross aisles.
372 00:21:31 That'll bring your dustbin into play.
373 00:21:33 Take the debris. Load it into the dustbin.
374 00:21:35 Take it out to the loading dock...
375 00:21:38 And empty it into the receptacle.
376 00:21:40 Got that?
377 00:21:41 Yeah. Easy as pie.
378 00:21:43 I was employed for a brief period at Del Taco, and...
379 00:21:45 I don't care about your Del Taco experience.
380 00:21:48 We've got this problem in this store with grazers.
381 00:21:50 You know what a grazer is?
382 00:21:52 Is that a farm term?
383 00:21:54 A grazer is a customer or an employee that eats off the shelves,
384 00:21:58 Similar to a cow grazing in a field of grass.
385 00:22:01 Only this isn't a field of grass, and you're not a cow.
386 00:22:03 There's no eatin鈥? You're not being paid to eat, so don't!
387 00:22:06 Any questions?
388 00:22:08 Not right offhand.
389 00:22:09 Think you can handle it?
390 00:22:10 I'll give it the old college try.
391 00:22:12 Don't touch me!
392 00:22:14 Well, despite our age difference,
393 00:22:16 I think I'll enjoy working with you.
394 00:22:18 Let's get something straight. You ain't workin' with me.
395 00:22:21 You're working for me.
396 00:22:23 I think it'll be fun.
397 00:22:25 I ain't gonna be near you.
398 00:22:27 I'm gonna be home pumping the pasties out of Colleen Jackson.
399 00:22:30 You're not going to be here?
400 00:22:31 Hell, no.
401 00:22:34 I'm gonna be here by myself?
402 00:22:37 That's right!
403 00:22:39 And you'd better stay out Of the ladies鈥?undergoods.
404 00:22:43 Wait a minute. Nobody told me I'd be here alone.
405 00:22:46 What are you doing? Saving money.
406 00:22:49 Wait. Are you turning off the lights?
407 00:22:51 In 25 seconds, you got light in every third aisle.
408 00:22:53 When the sun comes up, turn off all the lights. You understand.
409 00:22:56 No, I don't understand. Hold on a second!
410 00:22:59 I'm locking you in.
411 00:23:01 When I come back at 7:00 to open up,
412 00:23:04 I'll let you out.
413 00:23:07 You're locking me in?
414 00:23:09 You take me for a fool?
415 00:23:11 Nobody gets a set of keys on their first night. Nobody!
416 00:23:14 Get to work!
417 00:23:17 What if there's a fire?
418 00:23:18 The fire department will come.
419 00:23:20 I could perish!
420 00:23:22 Ha-ha-ha. Boo!
421 00:23:23 You can't do this. I'm locked in, alone, in the dark.
422 00:23:27 That was not a part of my employment agreement.
423 00:24:19 鈾?You got to wash with The crocodile in the river 鈾?
424 00:24:22 鈾?You got to swim With the sharks in the sea 鈾?
425 00:24:27 鈾?You got to live with The crooked politician 鈾?
426 00:24:31 鈾?Trust those things That you can never see 鈾?
427 00:24:35 鈾?Ay yeah, yeah Ay yeah, yeah 鈾?
428 00:24:38 鈾?Ay yeah, yeah Ay yeah, yeah 鈾?
429 00:24:41 Agh!
430 00:24:51 鈾?It's a cruel, crazy, Beautiful world 鈾?
431 00:24:56 鈾?Every day you wake up I hope it's a blue, blue sky 鈾?
432 00:25:03 鈾?It's a cruel, crazy, Beautiful world 鈾?
433 00:25:08 鈾?One day when you wake up 鈾?
434 00:25:10 鈾?I will have to Say good-bye 鈾?
435 00:25:16 鈾?Say good-bye 鈾?
436 00:25:23 鈾?It's your world So live in it, good-bye 鈾?
437 00:25:27 鈾?It's your world so live in it 鈾?
438 00:25:46 9:17?
439 00:25:50 Time for a break.
440 00:26:18 Hello.
441 00:26:22 Anybody out there?
442 00:26:24 When I accepted...
443 00:26:26 the post of president, grand pooh-bah of Target,
444 00:26:31 realizing that I have brought
445 00:26:34 meaningfulness and peace and happiness
446 00:26:37 into the lives of thousands of people.
447 00:26:40 Jim Dodge, of Monroe,
448 00:26:43 top moneymaker on the tour.
449 00:26:45 His father's here today, Bud Dodge,
450 00:26:47 and sister Penny, a sad, sad story,
451 00:26:49 was just admitted to university hospital.
452 00:26:52 While trying to pop a zit, her head mysteriously exploded.
453 00:27:20 Dad! Hi!
454 00:27:22 Jim, do you know what time it is?
455 00:27:24 I'm starting to think about Christmas and gifts,
456 00:27:27 because I'm in a big store and I'm getting gift ideas.
457 00:27:31 Hi.
458 00:27:33 Mom, hi!
459 00:27:34 How's it going?
460 00:27:36 I finished all my janitor stuff, most of it.
461 00:27:39 I've got to save some for later.
462 00:27:41 It's easy as hell.
463 00:27:43 Um, honey, it's a little late.
464 00:27:45 It is kind of late.
465 00:27:48 Well, sleep tight.
466 00:27:50 See you in the morning.
467 00:27:52 Love you, too.
468 00:27:59 Mr. James Dodge!
469 00:28:57 He can't be happy as the night cleanup boy.
470 00:29:02 Sweetheart,
471 00:29:05 he wants us to call him a janitor.
472 00:29:10 Maybe I should have spent less time harping
473 00:29:13 and more time helping.
474 00:29:15 Harpin' and helpin' him what?
475 00:29:19 Harpin' on him to leave, and helpin' him become the...
476 00:29:23 Good, mature, productive person he could be.
477 00:30:38 鈾?What the world needs now Is love, sweet love 鈾?
478 00:30:42 鈾?No, not just for some but for everyone 鈾?
479 00:30:56 Are you all right?
480 00:31:00 Yes, I'm fine, thanks. And you?
481 00:31:04 What are you doing here?
482 00:31:07 I work here.
483 00:31:09 Have a good one, Officer Don.
484 00:31:11 OK, Carl. Keep in touch. Let me know if you hear anything.
485 00:31:16 You bet.
486 00:31:18 Well, sir, she didn't leave on the bus.
487 00:31:21 Apparently, she isn't here. Let's look for her some place else.
488 00:31:24 She wouldn't be dumb enough to thumb, would she?
489 00:31:27 Does she have any friends she might have run off with?
490 00:31:32 Boyfriends?
491 00:31:33 Just get in the car so we can look for the girl.
492 00:31:37 I'm tired, had to get out of bed
493 00:31:39 haven't had any coffee, I don't feel good,
494 00:31:41 my daughter, I don't know where the hell she is.
495 00:31:43 And you're sounding like some goddamn preacher!
496 00:31:46 Come on. Get in the car!
497 00:31:50 Prick.
498 00:31:56 Are you sure you didn't hurt yourself?
499 00:31:58 Oh, no. Are you kidding?
500 00:32:01 I'm fine. I'm fine.
501 00:32:03 Can I ask what you were doing?
502 00:32:06 I was roller-skating.
503 00:32:08 I Know, but why?
504 00:32:10 Why not?
505 00:32:11 I got bored. One thing led to another
506 00:32:14 and I'm roller-skating in my shorts.
507 00:32:18 Better question would be, "what are you doing here?"
508 00:32:21 Shopping.
509 00:32:23 Well, we've been closed for five hours.
510 00:32:25 Yeah. I fell asleep.
511 00:32:28 While shopping?
512 00:32:29 No, in the ladies' dressing room.
513 00:32:31 That makes no sense. You're a high-profile young ing茅nue.
514 00:32:34 I was debating... What?
515 00:32:36 Whether or not to get arrested for shoplifting.
516 00:32:40 Doesn't your father own $10 million worth of real estate in this town?
517 00:32:43 It's not my fault.
518 00:32:44 I didn't imply such.
519 00:32:46 It just seems funny that someone of your...
520 00:32:50 Wealth?
521 00:32:51 If you will. Would shoplift.
522 00:32:53 I didn't do it. I chickened out.
523 00:32:55 Would consider shoplifting.
524 00:32:58 It's a long, dull, self-indulgent, highly unromantic story
525 00:33:03 about an overbearing father,
526 00:33:05 deceased mother and brother,
527 00:33:07 and a completely confused girl who looks a little like me.
528 00:33:49 I sure am glad you dropped by.
529 00:33:52 I was getting tired of being with myself.
530 00:33:58 I guess... I'm what you call a people person.
531 00:34:05 What are you cooking鈥?
532 00:34:06 Hobo chicken.
533 00:34:07 It's a glazed chicken in wine sauce...
534 00:34:10 with vegetables and skin-on potatoes.
535 00:34:13 Silverware, silverware.
536 00:34:18 It's only 210 calories.
537 00:34:21 I don't know if you're watching your figure, but I sure am.
538 00:34:25 If you can grab a serving spoon, I think we'll be set.
539 00:34:34 Keep your distance from these things.
540 00:34:36 I think it's safe to keep five feet.
541 00:34:43 I think they're about done.
542 00:34:48 Dining room's right this way.
543 00:34:53 Mmm!
544 00:34:55 Mmm. Oh.
545 00:34:57 I think my father poured the cement for your pool.
546 00:35:03 He's a cement contractor. Good man.
547 00:35:07 Bud Dodge?
548 00:35:08 My mother works at Hoenicker's over Christmas.
549 00:35:11 My sister's a teller at the bank.
550 00:35:13 My brother's in grade school. He's not employed.
551 00:35:16 I used to work at the animal shelter.
552 00:35:18 But I was terminated. Now I'm working here.
553 00:35:24 Do you always talk this much?
554 00:35:29 I guess I do.
555 00:35:31 I like talking to people.
556 00:35:35 I was thinking maybe you should go into sales.
557 00:35:37 I've tried.
558 00:35:46 Some fresh ground pepper?
559 00:35:49 Please.
560 00:35:52 Some people don't like a lot of pepper.
561 00:35:54 Say when. That's fine.
562 00:35:56 I happen to really like it a lot.
563 00:35:59 It enhances the natural flavor of the chicken.
564 00:36:06 I hope you don't take this the wrong way.
565 00:36:10 I've had dreams about you.
566 00:36:12 You've had dreams about me?
567 00:36:16 Not recently.
568 00:36:17 I've had dreams about you in the past.
569 00:36:19 I've had dreams about entire cheer leading squads,
570 00:36:22 So don't get me wrong.
571 00:36:24 It's kid stuff. How 鈥榖out you?
572 00:36:26 Do I dream?
573 00:36:30 That's about all I do.
574 00:36:46 - Raisin鈥?a kid's hard work. - You got any kids?
575 00:36:50 No, sir. And from listening to you,
576 00:36:52 and from observin鈥?this,
577 00:36:54 I'm kinda grateful Emily turned up infertile.
578 00:37:15 Shouldn't you be cleaning up the store?
579 00:37:18 I got plenty of time.
580 00:37:20 Big store.
581 00:37:22 Huge.
582 00:37:24 Always smoke cigars?
583 00:37:27 I enjoy a good one after a fine meal.
584 00:37:30 It settles the stomach.
585 00:37:32 You're the town liar, right?
586 00:37:39 What?
587 00:37:41 I'm sorry. That really came out wrong.
588 00:37:44 I don't see how it could come out right.
589 00:37:46 That's what people call you. I didn't mean...
590 00:37:48 To imply it's true. People call me that?
591 00:37:50 I thought you knew.
592 00:37:52 That I was the town liar?
593 00:37:53 You didn't?
594 00:37:55 No. I'm not.
595 00:37:56 You have the wrong information.
596 00:37:58 I didn't mean to offend you.
597 00:37:59 Did you think that was a compliment?
598 00:38:02 No. No. And I apologize.
599 00:38:04 I can't repeat things like that.
600 00:38:06 Don't think about it.
601 00:38:08 As I said, you've got the wrong information.
602 00:38:12 If people are calling me that,
603 00:38:14 it's because they're small, petty and jealous.
604 00:38:16 Small towns are notorious for that.
605 00:38:19 I'm sure there's a word for me.
606 00:38:20 Sure.
607 00:38:21 What do they call me?
608 00:38:23 A tease.
609 00:38:24 Tease?
610 00:38:27 Yeah, I can see that.
611 00:38:30 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
612 00:38:31 Actually, I never teased.
613 00:38:34 This is becoming amusing,
614 00:38:36 But who exactly calls me a liar?
615 00:38:39 Everybody.
616 00:38:40 Everybody.
617 00:38:41 No, not everybody.
618 00:38:42 I'm sure there's some old people in town.
619 00:38:43 Right.
620 00:38:51 What do you think?
621 00:38:52 What do I think?
622 00:38:56 Do you think I'm a liar?
623 00:38:58 I don't Know you well enough.
624 00:39:02 You've known me for almost 17 years.
625 00:39:04 We went to the same schools from kindergarten on up.
626 00:39:06 I Knew of you, but I didn't know you personally.
627 00:39:09 That's always bothered me.
628 00:39:12 I mean that old... In-out, us-them thing.
629 00:39:16 That's the way it's been.
630 00:39:17 It's always bothered me.
631 00:39:19 It's water over the dam now.
632 00:39:21 It's your dam and my water.
633 00:39:24 I got crapped on a lot of years.
634 00:39:26 I meant that it's in the past.
635 00:39:28 The present is a result of the past.
636 00:39:31 I look at my high school yearbook
637 00:39:33 and I don't see four fabulous years.
638 00:39:37 I'm reminded of what it feels like
639 00:39:39 to have my underwear yanked up my ass
640 00:39:41 by some big football player.
641 00:39:43 And where are those guys now?
642 00:39:47 I Know they're not working nights at Target. I'll tell you that.
643 00:39:52 Yeah. You know,
644 00:39:55 I look at my yearbook
645 00:39:57 and I see four fabulous years
646 00:40:01 that are gonna be the highlight of my life.
647 00:40:03 Here's what it's like.
648 00:40:05 First you feel a hand going down your pants
649 00:40:08 and tighten around the elastic waistband.
650 00:40:11 Highlight.
651 00:40:12 Sometimes I'd actually see stars.
652 00:40:14 It's not going to get better.
653 00:40:16 If I was particularly unlucky,
654 00:40:18 My shorts would rip completely free and I'd get...
655 00:40:22 Jim?
656 00:40:23 Do you hear me?
657 00:40:26 Yeah.
658 00:40:31 I don't really care about a graphic description of a childhood prank.
659 00:40:35 That prank was a motif in my life.
660 00:40:41 You know, I'm locked in this store here
661 00:40:45 because I didn't have the guts to steal a skirt
662 00:40:48 so I could get arrested and embarrass my father
663 00:40:51 in this stupid, desperate, childish,
664 00:40:53 pathetic attempt to leave home.
665 00:40:55 You have your underwear yanked up your ass.
666 00:40:58 I have my entire life yanked up my ass.
667 00:41:03 You're speaking figuratively.
668 00:41:05 I was speaking literally.
669 00:41:06 And you're happy.
670 00:41:07 You're happy.
671 00:41:10 I'm not happy.
672 00:41:11 I'm working nights. Everybody thinks I'm a liar.
673 00:41:16 My whole family鈥檚 laughing at me.
674 00:41:17 Reverend Harwell gave me the finger last week.
675 00:41:19 OK, you're not happy,
676 00:41:21 But at least you have some control over your life.
677 00:41:22 So do you.
678 00:41:23 My father controls my life.
679 00:41:25 You're over 18. You can tell him to drop dead, and get on a plane.
680 00:41:29 So can you.
681 00:41:30 I don't want to.
682 00:41:33 I like living at home.
683 00:41:35 No, you don't.
684 00:41:37 What am I, a garden snail?
685 00:41:40 An involuntary muscle in a janitor suit?
686 00:41:42 I know what I! want to do.
687 00:41:45 What could you possibly like
688 00:41:46 about living at home at your age?
689 00:41:48 The meals are great.
690 00:41:52 I mean, there's cable.
691 00:41:54 The accommodations are excellent, five-star.
692 00:41:58 What do you care if I'm living at home or not?
693 00:42:01 Hey, I didn't come here to irritate you.
694 00:42:04 Well, you're beginning to.
695 00:42:08 Great. That's really great.
696 00:42:11 I gotta stop saying those kinds of things.
697 00:42:14 Those freakin鈥?kids! I knew I couldn't trust 'em.
698 00:42:17 Town liar. That's a nice rep. Nice rep.
699 00:42:20 I bet it was Gregory, that little weasel.
700 00:42:23 Top secret, and they still shoot off their mouths!
701 00:42:26 If I'd really been a French spy,
702 00:42:28 those little tots would've gotten me killed!
703 00:42:30 Piano wire wrapped around my neck.
704 00:42:32 My testicles shoved down my throat,
705 00:42:34 A piece of dynamite stuck up my ass.
706 00:42:42 She's so beautiful.
707 00:42:46 And I'm the town liar.
708 00:42:52 鈾?Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la 鈾?
709 00:42:56 鈾?Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la 鈾?
710 00:43:00 鈾?Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la 鈾?
711 00:43:04 鈾?Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la 鈾?
712 00:43:07 鈾?Shiny boat through The open doorway 鈾?
713 00:43:15 鈾?Fell in love On a summer day 鈾?
714 00:43:23 鈾?You're only young once But that's all right 鈾?
715 00:43:29 鈾?Because it's just So good to be alive 鈾?
716 00:43:37 鈾?Take away your troubles Take them out the door 鈾?
717 00:43:41 鈾?Nothing on my mind Except my new love 鈾?
718 00:43:50 鈾?Nothing on my mind Except my new love 鈾?
719 00:43:57 鈾?Sha-la-la-la-la La-la-la 鈾?
720 00:44:01 鈾?Sha-la-la-la-la Li-la-la-la 鈾?
721 00:44:31 Jim, there's no reason to lie right now.
722 00:44:35 There's no one to impress.
723 00:44:38 I'm not impressed by a man telling me he likes living at home.
724 00:44:41 Excuse me.
725 00:44:43 I'm not lying,
726 00:44:45 And I'm not trying to impress you.
727 00:44:47 So if you'll excuse me,
728 00:44:49 I have to clean dead flies out of the lighting fixtures.
729 00:44:52 OK, my error. I apologize.
730 00:44:55 It's just that I can't imagine a man...
731 00:44:59 Giving up his independence, his right to mate,
732 00:45:03 to have a family,
733 00:45:05 to have children, to build a life for himself,
734 00:45:08 for good cooking.
735 00:45:10 Hold on.
736 00:45:11 I have not given up my right to mate.
737 00:45:14 I have the right to mate
738 00:45:16 anytime I feel like mating.
739 00:45:19 You go out with someone.
740 00:45:21 You bring her home. You introduce her to...
741 00:45:25 Mom, dad, sis, Bill,
742 00:45:28 Woofie the dog.
743 00:45:31 Cocktails in the rumpus room,
744 00:45:33 And then do it on the bunk bed?
745 00:45:37 Oh, let's analyze that remark.
746 00:45:39 First, I don't have a dog,
747 00:45:41 My brother's not named Billy,
748 00:45:43 And I don't even have a rumpus room...
749 00:45:46 You know what I mean.
750 00:45:53 Yeah, I know what you mean.
751 00:45:56 Spit on me, make me feel lousy.
752 00:46:05 Jim?
753 00:46:08 You said something that wasn't true.
754 00:46:11 No.
755 00:46:13 No, I said that I can have sex when I want to,
756 00:46:18 and I do.
757 00:46:20 However, I was looking forward
758 00:46:22 to a nice, quiet evening of janitoring.
759 00:46:25 I don't think you see what I'm getting at.
760 00:46:28 I see what you're getting at.
761 00:46:30 I'm a lying monk with an Oedipus complex
762 00:46:33 And an appetite for home cooking.
763 00:46:34 Don't forget, you're the indecisive shoplifter.
764 00:46:36 Yes! Exactly!
765 00:46:38 I would do anything to be in your shoes.
766 00:46:41 These are Darnell's shoes.
767 00:46:43 You have freedom, and you're not using it.
768 00:46:47 It makes me sad.
769 00:46:49 You have the collective wealth of the entire town,
770 00:46:52 and you're trying to get yourself arrested.
771 00:46:53 That makes me sad.
772 00:46:54 That makes me sad, too.
773 00:46:57 That's pretty stupid. It's very stupid.
774 00:47:00 Are you serious?
775 00:47:02 I mean, you haven't been drinking?
776 00:47:05 This isn't the bottle talking?
777 00:47:07 No.
778 00:47:09 Then why don't you just talk to the guy?
779 00:47:14 For the same reason that you can't leave home,
780 00:47:17 I can't tell my father to go to hell.
781 00:47:21 Why not?
782 00:47:25 Because I don't want to be alone.
783 00:47:56 Mr. McClellan?
784 00:47:59 You ever have any family problems, you and your daughter?
785 00:48:02 What the hell do you think this is?
786 00:48:07 You got a point.
787 00:48:14 Would you go with me somewhere?
788 00:48:19 Where? Florida?
789 00:48:21 Wyoming? Spain?
790 00:48:23 It doesn't really matter, just away somewhere.
791 00:48:27 I'd love to.
792 00:48:29 I just can't afford to be
793 00:48:32 Capricious and carefree like yourself.
794 00:48:34 I've gotta set my sights on something and really go for it.
795 00:48:39 Night janitor?
796 00:48:41 It's a beginning.
797 00:48:42 I... I'm looking at... It's an end.
798 00:48:47 Maybe if you had a destination in mind,
799 00:48:50 that would make all the difference in the world.
800 00:48:53 Why?
801 00:48:55 Well, uh, I'm just not built to aimlessly roam the world.
802 00:49:00 I'm too conservative for that.
803 00:49:04 Well, I was thinking about Los Angeles.
804 00:49:08 Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
805 00:49:11 What for?
806 00:49:12 Live. Work.
807 00:49:15 At what? Whatever.
808 00:49:18 And what about your father?
809 00:49:21 When I don't die,
810 00:49:23 he'll realize I can make it on my own.
811 00:49:26 If I do,
812 00:49:27 He'll have the satisfaction of knowing that I can't.
813 00:49:30 If he brings me back, or if I go back on my own,
814 00:49:34 he's just gonna beat the shit out of me.
815 00:49:36 So it doesn't really make a difference.
816 00:49:38 What? Literally?
817 00:49:42 Yeah.
818 00:49:45 Sad.
819 00:49:47 Yeah, it's sad.
820 00:49:48 Until he throws you across the room, that's sad.
821 00:49:52 I'm afraid to live with him,
822 00:49:53 and I'm afraid to live without...
823 00:49:55 You didn't come to work to hear this.
824 00:49:58 That's all right.
825 00:49:59 I'm gonna clean this up.
826 00:50:09 I'm just surprised.
827 00:50:11 I thought everything was OK, you know.
828 00:50:14 I figured you got a nice car, a nice house, some money.
829 00:50:17 Everything's OK.
830 00:50:18 It should be, but it's not.
831 00:50:21 It's twisted and it's distorted,
832 00:50:24 and it can't be changed and it cannot be saved.
833 00:50:34 I'll go with you.
834 00:50:40 Really?
835 00:50:43 Yeah.
836 00:50:46 We have to get a car.
837 00:50:49 Let's get through the night, first.
838 00:50:51 I have money.
839 00:50:52 How much?
840 00:50:53 Fifty-two thousand dollars.
841 00:50:58 On you?
842 00:51:01 In my purse.
843 00:51:15 Fifty-two thousand dollars. Wow.
844 00:51:19 I've never seen SO much money in my life.
845 00:51:21 This is more than my house cost.
846 00:51:25 Jim, now that I'm spending the night,
847 00:51:28 how can I pay you back
848 00:51:31 for being so cold to you in high school?
849 00:51:36 Do you need an answer right away?
850 00:51:38 No. Sometime before the sun comes up.
851 00:51:46 Well, uh...
852 00:51:48 You're probably not going to remember this,
853 00:51:50 but, uh...
854 00:51:53 There was a homecoming dance our sophomore year.
855 00:51:55 Mm-hmm.
856 00:51:56 Do you remember Mrs. Noble?
857 00:51:59 Large, hairy gym teacher
858 00:52:02 with a suspiciously cumbersome groin bulge?
859 00:52:04 I had her for two years.
860 00:52:06 She made everybody switch partners
861 00:52:07 because the fat girls were dancing together,
862 00:52:09 and the doinks, myself included,
863 00:52:11 were standing against the wall, blowing spit bubbles.
864 00:52:12 Right.
865 00:52:14 Well, for three-quarters
866 00:52:17 of one verse of a slow song,
867 00:52:21 we danced together.
868 00:52:24 You reeked of Stridex.
869 00:52:26 Oh, no, that was Larry Fry.
870 00:52:29 I'm sorry.
871 00:52:31 I don't remember.
872 00:52:33 Well...
873 00:52:35 You got your hair caught in my braces.
874 00:52:38 I don't remember.
875 00:52:39 Well, it's not important.
876 00:52:43 I had...
877 00:52:45 Well, I just always dreamed of finishing that dance.
878 00:52:53 OK.
879 00:52:57 Don't feel you have to answer right away.
880 00:53:00 It's just a small portion of my life that's incomplete.
881 00:53:04 I thought you were gonna say something different.
882 00:53:13 Well,
883 00:53:16 First things first.
884 00:53:34 鈾?When things go wrong 鈾?
885 00:53:39 鈾?As they sometimes will 鈾?
886 00:53:42 鈾?When the road you're trodding 鈾?
887 00:53:44 鈾?Seems all uphill 鈾?
888 00:53:50 鈾?When the funds are low 鈾?
889 00:53:55 鈾?And the debts are high 鈾?
890 00:53:58 鈾?And you wanna smile But you have to sigh 鈾?
891 00:54:07 鈾?When care 鈾?
892 00:54:10 鈾?Is pressing you down a bit 鈾?
893 00:54:14 鈾?Rest if you must 鈾?
894 00:54:21 鈾?But don't you quit 鈾?
895 00:54:26 鈾?Oh, now 鈾?
896 00:54:29 鈾?Don't you quit 鈾?
897 00:54:34 鈾?Oh, now 鈾?
898 00:54:51 鈾?But you never can tell 鈾?
899 00:54:55 鈾?How close you are 鈾?
900 00:55:00 鈾?It may be near When it seems so far 鈾?
901 00:55:06 鈾?Ooh, ooh 鈾?
902 00:55:21 You're ticklish there?
903 00:55:43 Aaah!
904 00:55:48 Ow.
905 00:56:22 Officer Don!
906 00:56:23 Oh! You scared the crap out of me.
907 00:56:26 I thought it was the custodian.
908 00:56:28 Jim, what are you doing in there?
909 00:56:30 I work here now.
910 00:56:37 You wanna let me in?
911 00:56:39 I'd love to let you in. I don't have the keys.
912 00:56:43 I'm locked in till 7:00 a.m.
913 00:56:45 What's going on?
914 00:56:46 Have you seen Josie McClellan?
915 00:56:50 Of course.
916 00:56:52 Dark hair, green eyes, beautiful.
917 00:56:57 Oh, yeah.
918 00:56:58 You seen her recently?
919 00:57:00 Oh!
920 00:57:01 Ah, matter of fact, I just saw her yesterday.
921 00:57:05 We had a cup of Java together.
922 00:57:07 She come into the store?
923 00:57:09 I don't know. I only work nights.
924 00:57:12 Why?
925 00:57:13 Well, she's missing.
926 00:57:17 I was looking this side of town for her
927 00:57:19 and I come past.
928 00:57:21 I seen that the outside sign's on.
929 00:57:24 The outside sign's never on.
930 00:57:26 Oh, yeah.
931 00:57:28 Did you try the library?
932 00:57:30 Maybe she fell asleep reading.
933 00:57:34 No.
934 00:57:35 She's probably screwing somebody
935 00:57:37 the old man don't approve of.
936 00:57:44 Would you know if
937 00:57:46 the custodian comes by to check up on people?
938 00:57:50 I wouldn't think he'd do that, Jimmy.
939 00:57:54 I feel pretty good now.
940 00:58:05 I'm sorry, sir.
941 00:58:07 I had to practice a little therapy.
942 00:58:10 Boy's in his own world.
943 00:58:19 鈾?Can't believe You've left me 鈾?
944 00:58:20 鈾?So know that You've upset me 鈾?
945 00:58:22 鈾?You just want To forget me 鈾?
946 00:58:24 鈾?Why don't you Come and get me 鈾?
947 00:58:26 鈾?And, boy, I really miss you 鈾?
948 00:58:28 鈾?And all I wanna do Is kiss you 鈾?
949 00:58:29 鈾?I've used up All my tissues 鈾?
950 00:58:31 鈾?鈥楥ause It's more serious, Some issues 鈾?
951 00:58:33 鈾?I don't even know The reason 鈾?
952 00:58:35 鈾?You were playin鈥?And you were teasin' 鈾?
953 00:58:37 鈾?Didn't tell me You were leavin' 鈾?
954 00:58:39 鈾?Those good looks Are deceivin' 鈾?
955 00:58:41 鈾?Where are you, baby? We used to have so much fun 鈾?
956 00:58:44 鈾?You drive me crazy 鈾?
957 00:58:46 鈾?Somebody tell me Where he's gone 鈾?
958 00:58:48 鈾?Where are you, baby? We used to have so much fun 鈾?
959 00:58:52 鈾?You drive me crazy 鈾?
960 00:58:55 鈾?You peep in Through the window 鈾?
961 00:58:57 鈾?This is too much For me to handle 鈾?
962 00:58:59 鈾?Already caused a scandal, A disturbance like a vandal 鈾?
963 00:59:02 鈾?I've lost track Of all time 鈾?
964 00:59:04 鈾?鈥楥ause you're always On my mind 鈾?
965 00:59:06 鈾?You're just that type of guy That'll make me cry 鈾?
966 00:59:08 鈾?Oh, why, oh, why, oh, why, Oh, why, he's disappeared 鈾?
967 00:59:11 鈾?This feeling Is really weird 鈾?
968 00:59:13 鈾?You're precious And you're dear 鈾?
969 00:59:15 鈾?Can you feel the weight Of these tears? 鈾?
970 00:59:17 鈾?Where are you, baby? We used to have so much fun 鈾?
971 00:59:21 鈾?You drive me crazy 鈾?
972 00:59:23 鈾?Somebody tell me Where he's gone 鈾?
973 00:59:25 鈾?Where are you, baby? We used to have so much fun 鈾?
974 00:59:28 鈾?You drive me crazy 鈾?
975 00:59:54 鈾?Where are you, baby? We used to have so much fun 鈾?
976 01:00:03 Aaah!
977 01:00:44 Why don't we get underneath the bench?
978 01:00:50 Do you want to get on top?
979 01:00:59 You check the office. I'll scope the dressing rooms.
980 01:01:02 Right.
981 01:01:12 You're on top.
982 01:01:16 Did you want to be on top?
983 01:01:18 Oh, no.
984 01:01:19 I'm fine where I am.
985 01:01:21 Sure.
986 01:01:56 Ow, ow, OW.
987 01:02:01 I think he went to the back.
988 01:02:15 Evening.
989 01:02:21 Nice.
990 01:02:23 Excellent.
991 01:02:25 Hey, you got a tattoo?
992 01:02:31 No, sir.
993 01:02:32 Not you, asshole!
994 01:02:34 I'm a missing person.
995 01:02:35 The whole town is looking for me.
996 01:02:38 You hidin' out?
997 01:02:39 Yes.
998 01:02:41 I'd appreciate it if you'd let us sit up.
999 01:02:44 What about the tattoo?
1000 01:02:46 I don't have one.
1001 01:02:48 You owe me a buck.
1002 01:02:49 Actually, it's up to two.
1003 01:02:51 I borrowed that one off you at burger king.
1004 01:02:53 Excuse me.
1005 01:02:57 Are you planning to shoot us in the back of the head?
1006 01:02:59 We haven't decided yet, have we?
1007 01:03:04 Who are you?
1008 01:03:05 Ah... you don't want to know.
1009 01:03:08 Wouldn't have asked if he didn't want to know.
1010 01:03:10 He's a little crazy. He's my brother.
1011 01:03:13 That's not true.
1012 01:03:14 She doesn't even know me.
1013 01:03:16 Somebody better start talking straight here.
1014 01:03:19 That's the truth.
1015 01:03:20 OK.
1016 01:03:24 You want to know?
1017 01:03:26 Mm-hmm.
1018 01:03:27 OK, good. But...
1019 01:03:32 Come on over here.
1020 01:03:34 What?
1021 01:03:36 Come on over.
1022 01:03:37 Come on over here!
1023 01:03:39 Over here.
1024 01:03:57 Come on down here.
1025 01:04:02 That's right. Down here.
1026 01:04:04 Uh-huh?
1027 01:04:06 OK.
1028 01:04:09 You dumb sons of bitches.
1029 01:04:12 Do you realize that you have just walked
1030 01:04:16 straight into a $60-million drug transaction?
1031 01:04:22 90, you're running this
1032 01:04:23 multi-zillion-dollar drug transaction by yourself?
1033 01:04:27 Little Target boy.
1034 01:04:29 No.
1035 01:04:31 No, I'm not doing it by myself.
1036 01:04:33 Oh, no, no.
1037 01:04:36 As a matter of fact,
1038 01:04:39 In about 10 minutes
1039 01:04:41 this place is gonna be alive with the meanest,
1040 01:04:44 Ugliest, most impatient animals you guys have ever seen.
1041 01:04:48 I'll give you five minutes to take
1042 01:04:52 Whatever you want in the whole store.
1043 01:04:54 I won't tell. Take your guns and go.
1044 01:04:58 OK, then, who's the girl?
1045 01:05:02 I'm his hostage. Yes, yes!
1046 01:05:06 Is that true? Hmm?
1047 01:05:08 Yes! Yes, it's true.
1048 01:05:11 And, um,
1049 01:05:16 if the deal doesn't go down, she becomes pig feed.
1050 01:05:20 Bullshit.
1051 01:05:21 Oh, really?
1052 01:05:26 Well, blow her away.
1053 01:05:28 That's bullshit!
1054 01:05:31 OK.
1055 01:05:34 Then give me your guns and I'll do it for you.
1056 01:05:38 It's bullshit, right?
1057 01:05:41 We'll see.
1058 01:05:45 Roll over.
1059 01:05:46 You heard him. What?
1060 01:05:48 Roll over! You too, honey.
1061 01:05:50 You heard me. Roll over. Do it!
1062 01:05:53 Come on, come on! Roll! That's it.
1063 01:05:57 Mmm! Yeah.
1064 01:06:00 Um, give me the guns.
1065 01:06:05 No way, man. Uh-uh.
1066 01:06:06 Fine.
1067 01:06:07 You do it. I don't need her anymore.
1068 01:06:11 I only needed her to get through custom.
1069 01:06:13 I don't like this.
1070 01:06:14 This sucks. It's not worth It.
1071 01:06:16 We don't have time. Do it!
1072 01:06:18 All right.
1073 01:06:23 It's nothing personal.
1074 01:06:25 Jim!
1075 01:06:26 Too late. They're here!
1076 01:06:27 It's too late. They're here.
1077 01:06:30 Men, hold your fire.
1078 01:06:34 Ned, Tommy, hold your fire.
1079 01:06:37 There are infrared scopes trained on your heads.
1080 01:06:40 We didn't want this!
1081 01:06:41 It's the girl you want, not us!
1082 01:06:44 Ned, we got a WD-40. That's right. A full-scale pms.
1083 01:06:47 Everybody, just relax!
1084 01:06:49 Everybody, just relax!
1085 01:06:51 The place is gonna blow.
1086 01:06:53 Just relax. Now, put down your guns.
1087 01:06:56 They're putting down the guns. Are you putting them down?
1088 01:06:59 Get down 鈥榗ause lives are at stake.
1089 01:07:02 Let go. Now get back.
1090 01:07:06 Spread 鈥榚m. Spread the legs. Put down the dogs.
1091 01:07:09 OK, put the dogs down.
1092 01:07:12 Put the dogs down! Both of 鈥榚m!
1093 01:07:13 Put the dogs down! Down!
1094 01:07:16 That was great!
1095 01:07:19 I got a surprise for you guys.
1096 01:07:21 We have a bit of a surprise for you, too.
1097 01:07:25 Them guns aren't loaded.
1098 01:07:37 I got an idea.
1099 01:07:39 How about a truce?
1100 01:07:41 I'm full of shit. You're full of shit.
1101 01:07:44 Everybody at one time is full of shit.
1102 01:07:46 I'll throw on some corn dogs and we'll get to know each other.
1103 01:07:50 I'd like to know what goes on inside your heads.
1104 01:07:53 OK, you had the big one...
1105 01:07:55 No.
1106 01:07:56 Sorry. I could've sworn you had the big one.
1107 01:08:03 I lied.
1108 01:08:08 These are the men that killed that guy in Saltburg.
1109 01:08:13 I'm fairly sure that we're gonna die.
1110 01:08:15 I'm disappointed we're not going to California together.
1111 01:08:18 We're not dead yet.
1112 01:08:21 Pretty darn close.
1113 01:08:23 No.
1114 01:08:24 If I can get them to take me with them,
1115 01:08:27 Maybe I can get away and come back for you.
1116 01:08:30 We need a car and they obviously have one.
1117 01:08:33 Just...
1118 01:08:35 Go along with whatever I do. OK.
1119 01:08:37 OK.
1120 01:08:50 50, what's the word on you two?
1121 01:08:52 Are you married?
1122 01:08:56 Obviously, you're hack crooks if you can't pull off
1123 01:08:58 a discount store job.
1124 01:09:01 What were you planning to steal? Hair spray?
1125 01:09:08 Sorry.
1126 01:09:14 Lady, you got a job?
1127 01:09:17 No.
1128 01:09:18 Then don't Knock ours.
1129 01:09:21 Crime isn't a job. It's a sickness.
1130 01:09:28 Whoops.
1131 01:09:30 Anyone have some change?
1132 01:09:44 You look like a lady in need of a quarter.
1133 01:09:46 I might need more than just a quarter.
1134 01:09:51 You know... No.
1135 01:09:54 You and I could make a lot of money.
1136 01:09:56 Honey, me and Nestor are partners.
1137 01:09:59 We don't need a third.
1138 01:10:01 You don't know, so shut up.
1139 01:10:07 Hop on.
1140 01:10:25 Now.
1141 01:10:28 Let's go now.
1142 01:10:31 Know what you are?
1143 01:10:32 Yeah.
1144 01:10:33 You are one good-looking ball of trouble.
1145 01:10:39 Good.
1146 01:10:52 鈾?Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya 鈾?
1147 01:10:57 鈾?Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya 鈾?
1148 01:11:05 鈾?Go 鈾?
1149 01:11:17 What do you think, for the car?
1150 01:11:19 This one?
1151 01:11:21 No, the whole thing. We'll lay it in back.
1152 01:11:24 We got multi-cassette capabilities.
1153 01:11:26 Think of the sound.
1154 01:11:28 鈾?Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya 鈾?
1155 01:11:33 鈾?Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya 鈾?
1156 01:11:39 鈾?Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya 鈾?
1157 01:11:44 鈾?Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya 鈾?
1158 01:11:50 鈾?Ya-ya-ya-ya Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya 鈾?
1159 01:11:55 I'm not helping you load your car.
1160 01:11:58 Think again, boy.
1161 01:12:00 You're not taking the stolen merchandise out.
1162 01:12:03 I'm not gonna let you.
1163 01:12:04 Get out.
1164 01:12:05 It's stolen. All of It!
1165 01:12:07 Gimme that! No!
1166 01:12:09 Give it to me! It's mine!
1167 01:12:16 But where... Wait a minute.
1168 01:12:22 You're not going with them?
1169 01:12:24 Yeah.
1170 01:12:26 You'll be an accessory.
1171 01:12:29 So?
1172 01:12:30 So? You don't know anything about them.
1173 01:12:33 You certainly don't know anything about him.
1174 01:12:35 These are hardened criminals here!
1175 01:12:37 That's enough!
1176 01:12:42 Don't waste your time. You could get a hernia.
1177 01:12:45 If my foot could talk,
1178 01:12:47 It would say, "may I please go up this geek's ass?"
1179 01:12:50 - Forget him! - All right.
1180 01:12:52 He's no use to us. The guy's built like an oyster.
1181 01:12:56 Listen, little mister.
1182 01:13:00 If you tell on us, I'll kill you.
1183 01:13:09 Fine.
1184 01:13:15 Jim.
1185 01:13:26 Don't be an ass.
1186 01:13:30 OK, Jimbo?
1187 01:13:35 Let's go, shall we?
1188 01:14:04 Ahem.
1189 01:14:06 Come on, come on!
1190 01:14:25 You got it? I got it.
1191 01:14:27 I got 鈥榚m. I got 鈥榚m.
1192 01:15:52 That wasn't a store robbery.
1193 01:15:55 That was an assassination.
1194 01:15:57 That wasn't a clerk. That was a wise guy.
1195 01:16:00 How do I know? I spent a little time
1196 01:16:03 with the FBI's organized crime unit.
1197 01:16:06 I'm intimately knowledgeable with the seedy and rancorous workings
1198 01:16:09 of the mob in the Midwest section of this country.
1199 01:16:12 I know a gangland slaying when I see one,
1200 01:16:15 And that's exactly what this is.
1201 01:16:19 I'd look into it myself personally,
1202 01:16:21 But I got a date tonight.
1203 01:16:31 Attention Target shoppers.
1204 01:17:21 Jim!
1205 01:18:17 He Is So cool!
1206 01:19:03 鈾?Got my ray-bans on Every day and night 鈾?
1207 01:19:06 鈾?Got a one-track mind That I wanna hide 鈾?
1208 01:19:09 鈾?Got an easy job That I try to keep 鈾?
1209 01:19:13 鈾?Got a bunch of girls And I got 鈥榚m cheap 鈾?
1210 01:19:16 鈾?Got a million things That I wanna do 鈾?
1211 01:19:19 鈾?But I waste my time Hangin鈥?out with you 鈾?
1212 01:19:24 鈾?It's not because I'm really easy to please 鈾?
1213 01:19:27 鈾?It's not the way you Bring me down on my knees 鈾?
1214 01:19:30 鈾?It's just a feeling But it keeps coming back 鈾?
1215 01:19:33 鈾?It's a tiny little Heart attack 鈾?
1216 01:19:40 鈾?Got a big guitar Lookin' dynamite 鈾?
1217 01:19:43 鈾?Got a Thunderbird That I drive all night 鈾?
1218 01:19:47 鈾?Got a shoeshine boy Working overtime 鈾?
1219 01:19:50 鈾?Gotta grow up soon But I never mind 鈾?
1220 01:19:53 鈾?Got a big fat guy Taking all the blame 鈾?
1221 01:19:57 鈾?For the chairs I break When you call my name 鈾?
1222 01:20:01 鈾?It's not because I'm really easy to please 鈾?
1223 01:20:05 鈾?It's not the way you Bring me down on my knees 鈾?
1224 01:20:08 鈾?It's just a feeling But it keeps coming back 鈾?
1225 01:20:11 鈾?It's a tiny little Heart attack 鈾?
1226 01:20:14 鈾?Just a tiny little Heart attack 鈾?
1227 01:20:48 鈾?Got a snakeskin suit That I really like 鈾?
1228 01:20:52 鈾?Lookin鈥?like the devil On a Friday night 鈾?
1229 01:20:55 鈾?Got a shark outside In the swimming pool 鈾?
1230 01:20:58 鈾?But there won't be trouble If you're stayin鈥?cool 鈾?
1231 01:21:02 鈾?Got my mind made up That I'm leavin鈥?you 鈾?
1232 01:21:05 鈾?But it won't be easy No, it won't be true 鈾?
1233 01:21:39 鈾?Got a snakeskin suit That I really like 鈾?
1234 01:21:43 鈾?Lookin鈥?like the devil On a Friday night 鈾?
1235 01:21:46 鈾?Got a shark outside In the swimming pool 鈾?
1236 01:21:49 鈾?But there won't be trouble If you're stayin鈥?cool 鈾?
1237 01:21:53 鈾?Got my mind made up That I'm leavin鈥?you 鈾?
1238 01:21:56 鈾?But it won't be easy No, it won't be true 鈾?
1239 01:22:00 鈾?I'll never make it Through a Saturday night 鈾?
1240 01:22:04 鈾?I'll never make Another move in the lights 鈾?
1241 01:22:07 鈾?鈥楥ause if I see you and You're lookin' like that 鈾?
1242 01:22:10 鈾?I'll get a tiny little Heart attack, attack 鈾?
1243 01:22:14 鈾?It's not because I'm really easy to please 鈾?
1244 01:22:18 鈾?It's not the way you Bring me down on my knees 鈾?
1245 01:22:21 鈾?It's just a feeling But it keeps coming back 鈾?
1246 01:22:24 鈾?It's a tiny little Heart attack 鈾?
1247 01:22:27 鈾?Give me a tiny little Heart attack 鈾?
1248 01:22:34 鈾?I want a tiny little Heart attack 鈾?
1249 01:22:37 鈾?Give me a tiny little Heart attack 鈾?
1250 01:22:40 鈾?I want a tiny little Heart attack 鈾?
