父亲的身份 Fatherhood(2021)(EN)Subtitles

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1 00:01:26 This sucks.
2 00:01:39 You haven't seen Matt, have you?
3 00:01:41 Yeah, I saw him go upstairs.
4 00:01:52 - Hi, Mom. - Hi.
5 00:01:58 Don't dress me.
6 00:02:00 You're gonna be okay.
7 00:02:02 The both of you are gonna get through this
8 00:02:04 because the Lord has a plan for you.
9 00:02:08 -I know, Mom. But don't put on my shoe.
10 00:02:09 -You're just gonna pick yourself up
11 00:02:11 and be this wonderful, special guy you've always been.
12 00:02:15 Yeah, I don't need you to tie my shoe.
13 00:02:18 Don't tie it, Mom.
14 00:02:35 We have to do this soon.
15 00:02:37 What do you mean by soon?
16 00:02:38 -The baby's not due for another two weeks. -Yeah.
17 00:02:41 Your amniotic fluid's low,
18 00:02:42 and your daughter's already a healthy size. So let's get her out.
19 00:02:46 -It's a girl. -I heard her. I heard what she said.
20 00:02:49 Oh, sorry. Were you waiting to find out?
21 00:02:51 You would've knew that if you were our regular doctor,
22 00:02:53 who chose this week of all weeks to go to Maui, 
23 00:02:55 which is insane.
24 00:02:57 Why not go bodysurf?
25 00:02:59 You know, it's just our first kid.
26 00:03:01 Also, she's still breech, so I wanna schedule a cesarean for this evening.
27 00:03:04 - For this evening? - Mm-hmm.
28 00:03:06 Well, I haven't even set up the crib. I didn't--
29 00:03:08 Are you serious?
30 00:03:09 See, I knew I should've taken care of it.
31 00:03:12 You told me to take it off my list.
32 00:03:13 'Cause I wanted you to take it off your list. I'm handling it. I got it.
33 00:03:16 That's really reassuring.
34 00:03:18 - Honey, I'm handling it.
35 00:03:19 - Are you really ready for this?
36 00:03:21 Yes! No-- Who's really ready?
37 00:03:23 Like, what does that mean when you say, "Are you really ready for this?"
38 00:03:27 This evening? Can we do it tomorrow?
39 00:03:30 'Cause I got a fantasy football draft. Um, me and some guys from work.
40 00:03:34 We put a nice little pool together, and we--
41 00:03:36 I'm kiddin'. Why are you taking me serious?
42 00:03:39 Stop. Relax, honey, all right?
43 00:03:40 That's a good one.
44 00:03:42 - All right. - You good?
45 00:03:43 Yeah, my hands started sweatin'.
46 00:03:45 -I know. -Yeah.
47 00:03:52 Why couldn't you guys give us adequate warning?
48 00:03:54 Well, we just thought it'd be fun to surprise you.
49 00:03:56 We said, "You know, we should have this baby tonight and mess with Marion."
50 00:03:59 -Love your sense of humor, Matt.
51 00:04:01 -Yeah, well, at least I got one. Bye-bye.
52 00:04:02 Oh, okay. Mom, we'll call you as soon as it's over, okay? I love you.
53 00:04:06 No, no! Skype me while it's happening.
54 00:04:08 -What? Mom!
55 00:04:10 -Okay, now we're just being weird.
56 00:04:11 I want to be in the room with my daughter
57 00:04:14 and to see my granddaughter when she enters the world.
58 00:04:16 Well, I'll be here to take care of her.
59 00:04:18 Like you took care of Cousin Janey's baby?
60 00:04:20 Mom, that is ancient history.
61 00:04:22 - Here we go. Here we go. - Not that ancient.
62 00:04:23 You don't put a baby on your lap
63 00:04:26 and then strap a seat belt over you
64 00:04:28 in the passenger seat in an automobile driving to 7-Eleven.
65 00:04:33 I know you don't hold a baby in your lap and strap a seat belt over you
66 00:04:35 while you in the passenger seat of an automobile driving to 7-Eleven.
67 00:04:38 I know that!
68 00:04:39 Terrific. Skype me.
69 00:04:42 Sweetie pie, Mommy will see you tomorrow.
70 00:04:44 - Okay, bye. Bye. - I--
71 00:04:46 Give Daddy a kiss, hmm?
72 00:04:51 And a kiss from Mommy. Two kisses.
73 00:04:53 -Wake up. -Oh my God.
74 00:04:55 I'm ready. I'm ready to dance.
75 00:05:05 - Matt. Hey, man. - Hey.
76 00:05:06 What's goin' on?
77 00:05:08 Oh hey, stay away from that tuna casserole.
78 00:05:11 The one in the middle tastes like ass.
79 00:05:15 My mom made that casserole, Oscar.
80 00:05:21 It's got, like, a tang.
81 00:05:23 -It's all right, man. It's okay. -Like a tangy--
82 00:05:28 Come here.
83 00:05:30 Matt.
84 00:05:31 -Jordan, I don't-- -Come here.
85 00:05:33 Nope, come here. Bring it in. You need this.
86 00:05:36 Bring it in.
87 00:05:38 Let it out. Breathe, breathe.
88 00:05:43 Come on, man.
89 00:05:44 Let me tell you something. That speech--
90 00:05:46 Your speech.
91 00:05:47 You went up there, and you talked.
92 00:06:00 I don't know what to say.
93 00:06:05 but you said, "No, I'm freestyling this."
94 00:06:08 Okay, we done? 'Cause I can't do this right now.
95 00:06:11 -Please. -No. Nope, Matt. Look at me.
96 00:06:13 -You can, and let me tell you why. -You're not listening to me.
97 00:06:16 Remember Camp Winapoo? You remember we went to Camp Winapoo?
98 00:06:19 -I do. -And you got the poison ivy in your face.
99 00:06:24 Then the bumps was poppin', so you had pus comin' out of your face.
100 00:06:27 And you looked crazy as hell, right?
101 00:06:29 You came to lunch, and your crush was there, Marcy.
102 00:06:31 You used to love Marcy.
103 00:06:32 And when she saw him, she screamed.
104 00:06:36 -And you was devastated. -Yeah.
105 00:06:39 -But you got through that. -Yeah.
106 00:06:40 You got through that?
107 00:06:41 Because you're strong and confident. And you'll get through this too.
108 00:06:49 This is so much worse than that.
109 00:06:52 How is that the same?
110 00:06:53 - I'm just trying-- -I promise you--
111 00:06:56 I'mma punch you in the face. Don't say nothin' else to me.
112 00:06:58 -Wow-- -I told you I can't.
113 00:07:01 Jordan, I swear to God.
114 00:07:02 -Why you ballin' up your fists? -Swear to God. Stop.
115 00:07:13 - How do you feel? - Good.
116 00:07:14 -It's gonna be okay, all right? -Okay.
117 00:07:17 I love you so much.
118 00:07:18 - I love my anesthesiologist.
119 00:07:20 - Stop it. Stop playin'.
120 00:07:22 - You're so beautiful.
121 00:07:23 - Matt! Matt!
122 00:07:25 Yes, Marion?
123 00:07:26 I can't see. Come on!
124 00:07:27 You're doing great, Liz. Might wanna look away now, Matt.
125 00:07:30 It's happening. I wanna look, but I don't wanna look.
126 00:07:33 But I do wanna look, but I don't want to look.
127 00:07:36 - You're doing great.
128 00:07:37 - Oh my God. We about to be parents.
129 00:07:41 - I love you.
130 00:07:42 - I love you too.
131 00:07:45 Okay? How we doin', doc?
132 00:07:47 - Here she comes.
133 00:07:48 - See the baby?- I do.
134 00:07:49 - Oh my God, Liz.
135 00:07:51 And there she is.
136 00:07:54 We got a baby.
137 00:08:54 -Matt. -Mmm.
138 00:08:56 Oh, you didn't have to.
139 00:08:58 I know I didn't have to. I wanted to, 'cause you deserve it.
140 00:09:01 It's beautiful. Thank you.
141 00:09:03 - Let me put it on you. - Thank you.
142 00:09:06 -Mmm! -You're still gonna have to do diapers.
143 00:09:08 As long as they promise to change my diapers when I get old, I'm happy.
144 00:09:12 -Love you. Thank you. -Love you. How you feelin'?
145 00:09:14 A little sore but--
146 00:09:16 -How are you doing, Liz? -I wanna see Maddy.
147 00:09:18 Hey.
148 00:09:19 I thought you might.
149 00:09:22 Matt, I'm gonna need you to come around here and help me.
150 00:09:25 -Gladly. -She's gonna be a bit wobbly.
151 00:09:27 - Okay. - We're gonna take this slow, okay?
152 00:09:29 Take your time. Take your time.
153 00:09:31 -Let's get you to the chair. Easy, easy. -Ready for a 10K.
154 00:09:35 -All right. -Guys, I feel light-headed.
155 00:09:37 Take your time, honey. Take your--
156 00:09:40 Liz? Liz? Liz?
157 00:09:43 What's wrong with her?
158 00:09:44 -Was she dizzy earlier? -What's wrong? Liz? I don't know!
159 00:09:46 -Liz? -She's having trouble breathing.
160 00:09:48 - What do you mean? - I'm gonna get help.
161 00:09:49 -Look at me! -Medical emergency!
162 00:09:51 Liz! Liz! Look at me!
163 00:09:52 -Give her space. -What's wrong with her?
164 00:09:54 - Liz? - I need an oxygen mask!
165 00:09:56 - Liz! - Can you hear me?
166 00:09:57 -I need you to step back now! -Wait a minute.
167 00:09:59 - That's my wife. - She collapsed.
168 00:10:00 -There were no precursory signs. -What's goin' on? Liz!
169 00:10:03 - That is my wife! - Her pressure dropped.
170 00:10:05 - Two milligrams of epi. - Wait a minute, man. Liz! Wait a-- Liz!
171 00:10:17 Mr. Logelin.
172 00:10:22 Your wife had a pulmonary embolism.
173 00:10:25 Uh, a blood clot traveled to her lung.
174 00:10:27 What does that mean?
175 00:10:29 What's that mea--
176 00:10:46 Don't tell me my wife is dead.
177 00:10:49 - Don't tell me my wife is dead. - What? What? What?
178 00:10:52 What is it? Is it Maddy? What?
179 00:10:55 Jus-- Matt!
180 00:11:00 No! No!
181 00:11:26 How?
182 00:11:47 I would trade everything to spend one more day with you.
183 00:12:05 Here she is.
184 00:12:38 He's not ready for a baby.
185 00:12:40 He hasn't even put the crib together.
186 00:12:42 Well, you know, he's always been extremely immature.
187 00:12:46 Oh, hi, Matt. How are you, dear?
188 00:12:49 I'm extremely immature.
189 00:12:53 -Can you give the baby, please?
190 00:12:54 -I just gave her a bottle.
191 00:12:56 Okay.
192 00:13:05 You know, Maddy,
193 00:13:07 if you could have only one parent, I wish you could've had your mom.
194 00:13:16 'Cause she would've been better at it.
195 00:13:22 I think sooner than later.
196 00:13:30 I don't know.
197 00:13:35 I don't know how he gonna do this.
198 00:13:38 - I know. - See?
199 00:13:39 Will you tell him that?
200 00:13:44 Nah.
201 00:13:55 All right! All right, Maddy!
202 00:13:57 Okay.
203 00:13:59 You win. You win, Maddy.
204 00:14:01 Tell me what it is. Are you hungry? Huh?
205 00:14:05 You want your diaper changed again?
206 00:14:13 Okay. Wait a second.
207 00:14:16 Hold on, Maddy.
208 00:14:18 Okay. Here.
209 00:14:21 All right. Okay.
210 00:14:22 All right, all right. Huh? Wait, I didn't get it all.
211 00:14:26 Oh my G-- Shit!
212 00:14:35 What are you doin' up?
213 00:14:38 I probably will never sleep again.
214 00:14:42 What is that on that baby's bottom?
215 00:14:45 It's a diaper.
216 00:14:46 It looks like a balloon animal.
217 00:14:48 -Is it inside out?
218 00:14:49 -The diaper's on fine.
219 00:14:51 I just came down to give her a bottle.
220 00:14:54 Already done. We heard her crying.
221 00:14:57 - Mm-hmm. Give her some. - Mm-hmm.
222 00:15:02 There you go. There you go.
223 00:15:06 Matthew, darling, we've been talking--
224 00:15:08 We think you should move back to Minnesota.
225 00:15:11 - It's financially prudent.
226 00:15:13 - It is. You can find a job there.
227 00:15:14 Your mom and I can help you raise Maddy.
228 00:15:17 We'll all be together. You'll have a church, a support system.
229 00:15:20 -You're all alone here.
230 00:15:21 -I'm not alone, okay? My job is here.
231 00:15:24 There are no good tech jobs at home.
232 00:15:26 My friends are here.
233 00:15:28 Your friends are kind of weird.
234 00:15:30 Okay. That may be true, but they're my friends, Ma.
235 00:15:33 Liz is here.
236 00:15:35 And every place that I look here,
237 00:15:37 every single place that I look makes me think of her.
238 00:15:41 Mom, you always talk to me about God's plan.
239 00:15:43 I would love to know what the odds are
240 00:15:45 of me meetin' somebody from my hometown halfway across the country.
241 00:15:48 God?
242 00:15:49 I had a plan.
243 00:15:51 Liz was to go away to grad school and then come back and work and live.
244 00:15:54 That was the plan before she met you.
245 00:15:57 Now, you want to stay, do that,
246 00:16:01 but Maddy comes with us.
247 00:16:02 - Marion, it's-- -It's the best thing for her.
248 00:16:05 Believe it or not, it's best for you too. I care about you.
249 00:16:10 You think you can do this, but you can't.
250 00:16:18 I understand,
251 00:16:24 Okay.
252 00:16:32 I thought about it.
253 00:16:36 You're right.
254 00:16:40 I can't do it. But you know what?
255 00:16:43 I'm gonna do it.
256 00:16:51 - And because I love her.
257 00:16:52 - I know you love her.
258 00:16:53 Do you know that I love her, Marion, because I doubt that you really do.
259 00:16:56 I have no doubt you love that baby.
260 00:16:59 I have no doubt you loved my Liz.
261 00:17:02 But you wanna keep Maddy to yourself because you need a life raft.
262 00:17:07 I'm sorry I messed up your plan.
263 00:17:17 You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.
264 00:17:20 You catch even more with a flyswatter.
265 00:17:22 Marion!
266 00:17:33 Let go.
267 00:17:35 Look, as a parent, we do all this shit, right?
268 00:17:38 Trying to make everything perfect.
269 00:17:42 But we don't have any control.
270 00:17:45 You just have to accept that fact.
271 00:17:51 Liz loved you.
272 00:17:53 And it made me happy to see that.
273 00:17:57 And I also saw how much you loved her.
274 00:18:05 Yeah.
275 00:18:10 You're a good father.
276 00:18:14 She was lucky to have you, Mike.
277 00:18:18 Thanks.
278 00:18:46 I had an aunt who died this past year.
279 00:18:48 She was 99.
280 00:18:53 It was.
281 00:18:58 Okay.
282 00:19:00 -Thank you. -Five weeks, six weeks.
283 00:19:02 I don-- Whatever.
284 00:19:03 I'll probably need about ten,
285 00:19:06 twenty years.
286 00:19:14 Listen, Howard, I was thinking maybe I could just work from home
287 00:19:20 And when I come in, I'd have to bring my daughter with me.
288 00:19:23 -You're taking care of her?
289 00:19:25 -That's correct.
290 00:19:25 All right. Good. Great. Okay.
291 00:19:29 You don't think I can do it.
292 00:19:33 - Because I'm a man?
293 00:19:34 - No. See, what is it that a woman has that a man doesn't?
294 00:19:37 Patience.
295 00:19:38 Emotional vulnerability.
296 00:19:42 Breasts.
297 00:19:43 Some men have breasts.
298 00:19:46 I'm gonna let that go 'cause you're grieving.
299 00:19:47 Listen, I love babies.
300 00:19:50 You know, I have three of them myself.
301 00:19:52 They're not babies anymore in the picture,
302 00:19:54 but when they started, they were babies.
303 00:19:56 And I'm tellin' ya, it's brutal.
304 00:19:58 It'll wipe you out.
305 00:20:00 She have solid poops yet?
306 00:20:01 No. Nope.
307 00:20:05 Enjoy the creamy shit. It's a big jump.
308 00:20:07 When you get to solid poops, it's not a picnic.
309 00:20:11 Okay.
310 00:20:15 'cause it's packed with nutrients, that stuff.
311 00:20:20 The London account, I know it's comin' up in five weeks.
312 00:20:22 I just wanna tell you, I'm on it.
313 00:20:25 You know, I'm more than capable of doin' the job that needs to be done.
314 00:20:32 maybe you could put Oscar on it.
315 00:20:33 -Jesus Christ. Oscar? -And see-- Yeah.
316 00:20:35 No, no, no, no. Nah, no, no. Forget Oscar.
317 00:20:39 Did you ask him, "Do you want Oscar to handle the clients?"
318 00:20:42 -Yeah. I did. -Remember? Like we rehearsed?
319 00:20:44 I said it, Oscar. It worked.
320 00:20:45 -I told you it would. That's great news. -Yeah. Yeah. D--
321 00:20:53 It's kind of cruel to send flowers to someone who's grieving.
322 00:20:56 'Cause, you know, flowers die, and then you gotta throw them out.
323 00:21:01 It's just such a bummer.
324 00:21:07 But, um, you know, I've seen a squirrel pass.
325 00:21:10 It makes you wonder about the circle of life.
326 00:21:11 But it's not really a circle. It's like a line.
327 00:21:13 -'Cause there's a beginning and an end. -Hey, Oscar.
328 00:21:18 Can you stop talking?
329 00:21:20 Man, you sound just like my wife.
330 00:21:27 You're gonna swaddle Maddy, aren't you?
331 00:21:29 Did you swaddle Liz?
332 00:21:30 I sure did.
333 00:21:31 Then, yeah, I mean, I'mma do whatever Liz would've wanted me to do.
334 00:21:41 What, do you think she's gonna run away or somethin'?
335 00:21:44 - Hmm. - What up?
336 00:21:45 How you doin'?
337 00:21:47 These are Flamin' Hots.
338 00:21:49 Anybody want some? Grandmas? Want me to give one to the baby? Mmm.
339 00:21:52 Y'all lookin' good, ladies. Can I say that to you?
340 00:21:55 - Thank you. - Yeah.
341 00:21:56 -No problem. You know-- -Stop it.
342 00:22:02 What am I doin'?
343 00:22:03 -You're flirtin' with my mother. -I'm not flirtin'.
344 00:22:05 I'm looking at you flirt with my mama.
345 00:22:06 I'm flirtin' with both your mamas.
346 00:22:08 Hey, Marion, how you doin'? Looking good.
347 00:22:10 -Jordan. -Kind of a blouse-sweater, huh?
348 00:22:14 Jordan, stop it.
349 00:22:16 - I can't help your mom is a GILF. - That's it.
350 00:22:18 - Yeah, I said it. - Stop.
351 00:22:22 Wait right here. I'll be right back. I got somethin' for you.
352 00:22:25 We've been makin' a list. We need onesies.
353 00:22:27 And you need a lock. A toilet lock.
354 00:22:29 You know, they can drown in the toilet.
355 00:22:31 Look,
356 00:22:36 - I wish I didn't have to go back--
357 00:22:38 -I'm not talking to you, Mom.
358 00:22:39 We've discussed that. But, Marion,
359 00:22:41 I wasn't a hundred percent sure about you.
360 00:22:43 Well, since you refuse to move back to Minnesota,
361 00:22:46 I'll stay six months.
362 00:22:50 Six months?
363 00:22:51 -Yes.
364 00:22:52 -What about Mike?
365 00:22:54 Oh, I don't care about Mike right now.
366 00:22:55 Hey, Matt.
367 00:22:58 Hey, uh, Mike. How you doin', man?
368 00:23:01 - Doin' well, man.
369 00:23:02 - Okay.
370 00:23:04 I want us to be honest for a second.
371 00:23:06 Okay, let's be honest.
372 00:23:10 The first thing I want to say is that I love havin' you here.
373 00:23:12 I know you do.
374 00:23:22 we're gonna end up gettin' on each other's nerves.
375 00:23:24 In just six months?
376 00:23:25 That's why I was thinking maybe you could leave when my mom leaves.
377 00:23:28 What would I look like goin' home before I know that you are capable
378 00:23:32 of taking care of my newborn grandchild?
379 00:23:35 How are you ever gonna know if you don't let me do it?
380 00:23:37 That is a great damn point.
381 00:23:40 Huh? Forty-love.
382 00:23:43 Forty-love, Matt. Here you go, brother. Look what I got for you, huh?
383 00:23:46 What is that, Jordan?
384 00:23:47 -I got you a pet.
385 00:23:49 -That's a goldfish.
386 00:23:50 And let me tell you somethin', kids with pets are really happy.
387 00:23:53 Also, they don't get any allergies. Did you know that?
388 00:23:56 That's cats and dogs.
389 00:24:00 -Damn it, you read the same article.
390 00:24:04 All right, I'm bullshitting you, man. I'm sorry. Excuse my French.
391 00:24:07 I hate this fish. You remember Tanya? She gave me this fish.
392 00:24:09 Tanya broke up with me and left this dirty-ass fish in my house.
393 00:24:13 Can you take me to the baby store?
394 00:24:16 -Hell yeah! -Thank you.
395 00:24:17 Team Single Father!
396 00:24:18 I'm here to help you at the end of the day.
397 00:24:20 Thank you.
398 00:24:21 Okay, Marion. How about we do this?
399 00:24:26 I promise to give you updates, let you know how Maddy's doin'?
400 00:24:30 Uh, I'll post pictures on my Instagram all the time.
401 00:24:32 All right.
402 00:24:33 I will go home when Anna goes.
403 00:24:36 But if you are not handling everything all very well,
404 00:24:41 you move your butt back to Minnesota.
405 00:24:43 -Why would I agree to that?
406 00:24:45 -Because it's not about you.
407 00:24:49 - Deal. - Brother, real quick.
408 00:24:52 - You good on the fish? - I don't want the fish, man.
409 00:24:55 - How you doin'? - Good. You?
410 00:24:56 I'm doin' fine. Here you go.
411 00:25:01 You better stop smilin' at me like that.
412 00:25:03 Here you go.
413 00:25:06 I don't have no kids. This is for my friend.
414 00:25:08 This for his baby. You know, man, he's buyin' all this stuff.
415 00:25:12 He's paying for everything.
416 00:25:14 Oh, here we go.
417 00:25:23 Here. Just put yours over there
418 00:25:25 so she knows that you have to pay for the stuff that you got
419 00:25:27 for your problem by yourself.
420 00:25:29 And this one's the one I'm paying for for Maddy.
421 00:25:31 -That's yours. This is Maddy's. -Okay.
422 00:25:39 - On your butt. - Not on my butt.
423 00:25:40 -I have shavin' bumps from shavin' and--
424 00:25:44 I saw a video
425 00:25:46 that people use diaper rash ointment to keep their skin clear
426 00:25:50 from gaining shavin' bumps. That's why I got such a smooth neck.
427 00:25:54 -I look great? -Yeah.
428 00:25:55 See, look at that. Yeah, she said I look great.
429 00:25:57 Ask to see his butt.
430 00:25:59 "Now insert the eighth 44-millimeter screw."
431 00:26:09 I don't see it.
432 00:26:12 You're not even looking for real.
433 00:26:17 Okay.
434 00:26:18 Why do you keep acting like you dumb, huh?
435 00:26:21 Because I didn't see it, I'm acting like I'm dumb?
436 00:26:23 You acting like a dumb mother-fudger right now.
437 00:26:25 -Don't cuss at me in front of my child.
438 00:26:26 -I didn't. I called you a mother-fudger.
439 00:26:28 Why are you sayin' "fudge"?
440 00:26:29 There's a baby. I don't wanna curse in front of the baby.
441 00:26:31 So why not just choose another word?
442 00:26:33 I did. "Fudge."
443 00:26:35 Man. You know, your daddy is a witch.
444 00:26:38 Yeah, I said it. He's a dumbass witch.
445 00:26:42 Goofy mother-fudger.
446 00:26:51 Just reach under and flip the switch.
447 00:26:53 I did reach under. It's broken.
448 00:26:55 You've always been so impatient.
449 00:26:57 Stop. This ain't got nothin' to do with patience!
450 00:26:59 I'm telling you I'm trying to do it, and you just-- I can't!
451 00:27:02 I can't, Mom!
452 00:27:04 Shit.
453 00:27:06 I can't do none of it.
454 00:27:09 I can't do it.
455 00:27:11 Not without Liz.
456 00:27:13 You just have to do what's best for her.
457 00:27:17 That's all you have to do the rest of your life.
458 00:27:20 And I believe you can do that.
459 00:27:33 Right here.
460 00:27:35 Show-off.
461 00:27:38 I'm gonna be praying for you ten times a day.
462 00:27:40 Listen, if it's nine, don't kill yourself, okay?
463 00:27:43 Love you, Mom.
464 00:27:44 -That's real lucky. -"Goodbye, Nana."
465 00:27:47 -Come, come, come. -You got her?
466 00:27:50 We have a deal now.
467 00:27:52 If it's in her best interest, you're moving back. Okay?
468 00:27:56 No being selfish.
469 00:27:58 Agreed.
470 00:28:06 - Love you! - Good luck.
471 00:28:07 I love you, Maddy. Grammy loves you.
472 00:28:10 - Bye! - Bye!
473 00:28:34 -Daddy in a sling. Look at that. -How do I look?
474 00:28:37 You look great. Like a king.
475 00:28:38 -Don't say it just to be sayin' it, man.
476 00:28:40 -You look like a king.
477 00:28:41 - You gotta buckle it. - Push it down.
478 00:28:43 -I'm pushin' down. -I'm pushing my side down.
479 00:28:45 - So buckle it. - No, but it's still wobbly.
480 00:28:48 Fellas! Fellas! Okay, have you even attached the third anchor latch? Huh?
481 00:28:53 Oh my God. Oh no, no, no, Maddy.
482 00:28:57 I'm sorry. Daddy's sorry.
483 00:29:00 Come on.
484 00:29:02 -That's in there. That's sturdy. -That's steady.
485 00:29:04 -Thank you. -I was a nanny for four years.
486 00:29:06 Wait, wait.
487 00:29:08 What?
488 00:29:09 She's awake, man.
489 00:29:10 -No, she ain't. -Yes, she is. I just heard her.
490 00:29:12 -I don't have a bottle, man. -Oh man.
491 00:29:15 Here's the formula. All right.
492 00:29:19 You just cut the top.
493 00:29:22 You were so hungry. You were so hungry.
494 00:29:51 Hiyo!
495 00:29:52 Oh, where's mom?
496 00:29:55 Oh, mom's an astronaut trainin' at NASA.
497 00:29:57 Where is mom today?
498 00:29:59 Oh, mom is servin' time in San Quentin.
499 00:30:01 Where's her mom?
500 00:30:03 Me, I can't wait till Monday comes
501 00:30:05 so I can get away from my kids screaming.
502 00:30:07 Wow. I bet they're probably psyched to get away from you too.
503 00:30:48 We brought you some flowers.
504 00:30:52 Oh, I thought I should tell you that you got one of your wishes.
505 00:30:56 I'm changing a lot of diapers.
506 00:30:59 This little kid here poops a lot.
507 00:31:09 Cute baby, papi.
508 00:31:16 -Thanks, man. -All right.
509 00:31:19 Look, Maddy, we're about to pass the school that Mom wanted you to go to.
510 00:31:23 Which means that that's where you gonna go.
511 00:31:26 They got nuns there, and you'll like nuns.
512 00:31:29 You'll like nuns 'cause nuns dress like penguins.
513 00:31:31 That's a fact.
514 00:31:33 And they're celibate.
515 00:31:35 I know. I know.
516 00:31:37 I know, you fussin'.
517 00:31:39 I know you don't wanna be celibate, but you're gonna be.
518 00:31:43 Good talk.
519 00:31:58 Come on, Maddy.
520 00:32:00 What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
521 00:32:03 Roller coaster. Come on, Maddy.
522 00:32:05 Here it is. Goin' down this track.
523 00:32:08 Goin' down. It's gettin' rocky and shocky.
524 00:32:20 No, Mom. Listen to me. You don't understand.
525 00:32:23 I'm seri-- It's just, like, she will not stop cryin'. She won't.
526 00:32:28 Well, sometimes I would sing you a little lullaby,
527 00:32:30 and that would quiet you right down.
528 00:32:32 ♪ Twinkle, twinkle, little star♪
529 00:32:37 ♪ How much Daddy needs a bar♪
530 00:32:41 ♪ Go to sleep, Maddy ♪
531 00:32:45 Try to sing higher.
532 00:32:47 ♪ Go to sleep, Maddy ♪
533 00:32:49 ♪ Maddy, go to sleep Maddy, go to sleep♪
534 00:32:51 -♪ Go to sleep, Maddy ♪
535 00:32:53 -It's not working, though.
536 00:32:54 ♪ Maddy, go to sleep Maddy, go to sleep ♪
537 00:32:56 Oh no, that's-- No, that made it worse.
538 00:33:00 She's not a clapper.
539 00:33:01 - She just won't stop.
540 00:33:02 - Listen to your daddy!
541 00:33:04 Your daddy said go to bed, Maddy.
542 00:33:07 Your father is tired.
543 00:33:10 -That's not abuse.
544 00:33:11 Yeah, that's not abuse. -Yep.
545 00:33:12 That's borderline.
546 00:33:13 My nipples are so cracked, I'm scared to even look at them.
547 00:33:17 Is it weird that breastfeeding kind of turns me on a little bit?
548 00:33:21 My husband wants sex.
549 00:33:23 I just want him to die. Is that wrong?
550 00:33:27 No.
551 00:33:30 Excuse me.
552 00:33:31 Um, I'm sorry. AA is down the hall to the right.
553 00:33:34 I'm not here for that.
554 00:33:41 but she's been, like, crying for hours.
555 00:33:46 And my face hurts, and I'm getting frustrated.
556 00:33:48 And I don't know how to break the stroller down.
557 00:33:50 I don't know how to fold it up.
558 00:33:53 Okay. Well, sorry, but this is a group for new mothers.
559 00:33:56 You're lying,
560 00:33:58 because on that sign out there, it says "parents."
561 00:34:00 I'm a parent, and I don't know what the hell I'm doing.
562 00:34:02 I don't have nobody else to talk to about this shit.
563 00:34:04 Speaking of shit, the girl's got some stuff flyin' out of her ass.
564 00:34:08 It's like a fire hose.
565 00:34:09 I don't know if it's normal or not, but it's two different kinds.
566 00:34:11 She can either hit you with a streamer.
567 00:34:18 Or she'll buckshot you.
568 00:34:23 I need help. I need the crying to stop.
569 00:34:27 How do I make the crying stop?
570 00:34:31 Okay, um, my oldest had colic for the first couple of months.
571 00:34:35 -What's colic?
572 00:34:36 -It's when babies cry for hours on end
573 00:34:38 without any reason until you feel like your eyes are about to pop out.
574 00:34:43 I gave the baby colic.
575 00:34:47 I'm not washing my hands, and I'm touching the baby.
576 00:34:49 And that's how I gave the baby colic.
577 00:34:51 You don't give a baby colic. It's more of a digestive thing.
578 00:34:56 That's a relief.
579 00:34:57 Thing that worked for me was white noise, surprisingly.
580 00:35:00 White noise?
581 00:35:01 White noise.
582 00:35:27 And then looking ahead, I'm gonna turn it over to Matt.
583 00:35:30 And he's gonna show you how this all can work for your customers.
584 00:35:34 All right, Matt, you're up.
585 00:35:40 - Matt. - Matt!
586 00:35:41 I'm not sleep.
587 00:35:42 Sleep.
588 00:35:44 Nah, this guy never sleeps. He's deep in thought.
589 00:35:46 Yeah, deep in-- That's exactly what it is.
590 00:35:49 Very deep in thought.
591 00:35:51 Thank you. Thank you, Howard.
592 00:35:58 With this upgrade, there's thousands,
593 00:36:01 and I mean thousands of preset visuals from flooring
594 00:36:10 You hear cryin'?
595 00:36:12 Crying? I don't hear any crying.
596 00:36:14 I have a deviated septum,
597 00:36:16 so my nose whistles sometimes. Maybe that's it?
598 00:36:20 I'm sorry. Excuse me for a second, please.
599 00:36:24 Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
600 00:36:27 Here we go. Here we go.
601 00:36:30 -Huh? Huh? -Okay. Vacuum, yeah.
602 00:36:32 Come on. Shh.
603 00:36:34 We're gonna vacuum. We're gonna vacuum.
604 00:36:37 Hey, Maddy!
605 00:36:37 - Hey, hey. Whoa. - This vacuum sucks.
606 00:36:39 -What's going on? -Come on, Maddy. What's going on now? What are you doing?
607 00:36:43 -What's going on? -He's doing the vacuum thing.
608 00:36:45 - Here, let me take her. - The vacuum thing?
609 00:36:47 -Okay. -She likes the vacuum noise.
610 00:36:49 Hey! Hi.
611 00:36:51 Uh, Matt's got a baby.
612 00:36:52 Hey, I apologize for storming out like that.
613 00:36:55 But she goes on these crying jags,
614 00:36:57 and it's impossible to really get her to stop and calm down.
615 00:37:00 -Does she wanna try sucking on my pinkie? -No.
616 00:37:03 -I used to help with my kids. -No. Howard, no.
617 00:37:05 -They loved to suck on the pinkie. -Not sanitary.
618 00:37:10 - It helps me sleep. - Thank you.
619 00:37:12 My baby always calmed down with skin-to-skin contact.
620 00:37:16 She's 25 now.
621 00:37:19 And I want you to notice the easy map-tree interface as well.
622 00:37:22 Once again, it's about giving our customers what they want,
623 00:37:25 which is the simplicity.
624 00:37:26 Right? Isn't that what you want, huh?
625 00:37:28 -They want simplicity. -Okay.
626 00:37:30 I got a problem now. This is a place of business, right?
627 00:37:37 I'm the designated asshole.
628 00:37:39 Who designated you?
629 00:37:44 You don't think there's an asshole above me?
630 00:37:46 And above that asshole, another asshole.
631 00:37:49 An asshole chain.
632 00:37:51 It's an asshole chain. That's exactly what it is.
633 00:37:53 So-- Yeah?
634 00:37:55 Just wanted to say, great presentation, Matt.
635 00:37:59 Definitely memorable. We'll be talking this week.
636 00:38:02 Thank you. Thank you for that.
637 00:38:04 It means a lot since I'm about to get fired.
638 00:38:06 - Thank you for-- -No.
639 00:38:07 We'll be in touch. Thank you, Fionna.
640 00:38:11 See ya.
641 00:38:12 Go on. Finish.
642 00:38:13 Hey, you're not that lucky. I'm not firing you.
643 00:38:16 I just happen to be worried about you.
644 00:38:18 When's the last time you had a break?
645 00:38:20 You know, there's a new thing called babysitters.
646 00:38:22 - Oh, hi, Maddy. - Yeah.
647 00:38:24 My name is Summer. I'm going to pick you up now.
648 00:38:29 Oh, she doesn't speak English yet. She's just a baby.
649 00:38:32 Oh, I believe you have to treat the infant with respect.
650 00:38:35 Right, Maddy? We've got this.
651 00:38:48 Yeah, yeah.
652 00:38:49 That's it.
653 00:38:54 All daddies deserve some time off. Have some fun.
654 00:38:57 You got a babysitter. Have a good time.
655 00:38:59 You need this, bro. You a single parent now.
656 00:39:01 Which is crazy to me to say this. "Matt is a dad."
657 00:39:04 To say that out loud still sound-- "Matt is a dad."
658 00:39:07 That is crazy. So insane.
659 00:39:08 -That's crazy. Hey. -What are you doin'?
660 00:39:10 Nothin'. I'm just listening to you.
661 00:39:12 Are you serious right now?
662 00:39:15 -What? -What do you mean? What was that?
663 00:39:17 You don't see the diversity just walked past? Huh?
664 00:39:20 -All the flavors. For all of us. -Okay.
665 00:39:21 I gotta get going, man. I'm going home.
666 00:39:25 - Matt. - Excuse me.
667 00:39:27 -Excuse me. -Matt! Matt! Matt! Hey, hey, Matt!
668 00:39:29 -What, man? -What's up? Where you goin'?
669 00:39:31 What do you mean, where I'm goin'? Home!
670 00:39:32 -Why are you leavin'? -Because I'm not havin' a good time.
671 00:39:35 What? We got girls back there. We're taking shots, having a good--
672 00:39:37 I don't care about no girls, man.
673 00:39:40 What makes you think I care about girls now?
674 00:39:41 Man, I brought you out to have a good time.
675 00:39:43 I don't want your version of a good time, Jordan.
676 00:39:47 I don't want it.
677 00:39:48 Okay, look. I get it. You haven't been out since Liz.
678 00:39:50 -But it's-- -Shut the-- Hey, man.
679 00:39:53 Don't.
680 00:39:55 Don't do that. Don't bring Liz up.
681 00:39:58 Don't do that.
682 00:40:03 Idiot.
683 00:40:05 -Say bye. -Bye.
684 00:40:07 Goodbye.
685 00:40:09 We're never gonna see her again, are we?
686 00:40:12 All we need is us. We don't need no one else.
687 00:40:35 Here come Javier.
688 00:40:37 That's daddy's new best friend. He brings us our formula, our diapers.
689 00:40:41 He gives us everything we need so we don't have to talk to people again.
690 00:40:45 If anybody else ring this bell, they die. You hear me?
691 00:40:47 I say, if anybody ring Daddy bell, they gonna die.
692 00:40:56 I said, "No ringin'."
693 00:40:58 I said, "No ringin' the damn bell."
694 00:41:02 I'm gonna kill somebody.
695 00:41:07 Good morning.
696 00:41:08 -Hi. -Hey.
697 00:41:09 Where is my grandbaby?
698 00:41:10 What are you--
699 00:41:11 Is she dressed?
700 00:41:12 -What are you doing here, Marion?
701 00:41:13 -Well, it's Maddy's pediatrician visit.
702 00:41:16 Oh, shit! Is it Thursday already? Shit!
703 00:41:19 Yeah, you didn't forget the pediatrician's visit, did you?
704 00:41:23 I didn't forget anything. You just caught me.
705 00:41:26 We was about to leave. She just got out of the tub.
706 00:41:28 You left her in the tub?
707 00:41:30 Good.
708 00:41:31 Yeah.
709 00:41:33 How's she been eating?
710 00:41:37 I mean, okay, I guess, you know?
711 00:41:43 Every once in a while, if she's sleeping,
712 00:41:45 I may let her go, like, an extra hour or something.
713 00:41:48 And how about you? How are you doing?
714 00:41:53 -It's about-- -How is Maddy?
715 00:41:55 Is she okay?
716 00:41:56 Look, I know I ain't perfect.
717 00:42:03 -I'm a joke, okay? Lis-- -Matt, you're not a joke.
718 00:42:05 Maddy is doing great.
719 00:42:07 She's moved up to the 60th percentile in weight
720 00:42:09 and 70th in height.
721 00:42:11 You can start feeding her when she's hungry.
722 00:42:14 Look, I hope you don't mind me saying this, but your wife would be very proud of you.
723 00:42:36 It's okay, Marion.
724 00:42:39 It's all right.
725 00:42:43 You hungry? You wanna go get lunch?
726 00:42:45 Uh, no, no. Actually, um, I gotta get back to the airport.
727 00:42:49 -Already? -Yeah, yeah.
728 00:42:52 I told Mike that I was spending the day at the spa.
729 00:42:55 You told--
730 00:42:58 Want me to take you? I can give you a ride.
731 00:42:59 No, she needs to get to her little nap.
732 00:43:01 You want a little nap?
733 00:43:03 Oh God. Matthew,
734 00:43:05 today was a good day for you as a parent.
735 00:43:09 You keep all these little victories like you had today in a little box inside you.
736 00:43:15 They'll be your most prized possessions.
737 00:43:19 And don't let me have to come back up here
738 00:43:21 before Father Mayfield is going to christen her in Minnesota.
739 00:43:27 Saint Augustine's, three weeks. I'll see you there.
740 00:43:29 Wait, what do you--
741 00:43:30 Minnesota, three weeks. See you.
742 00:43:32 -Minnesota in three-- -Grammy loves you, Maddy.
743 00:43:40 Who finished up their whole bottle? You did.
744 00:43:42 Yes, you did. You were hungry.
745 00:43:45 Huh?
746 00:43:46 "I'm hungry, Daddy."
747 00:43:48 It's her first flight.
748 00:43:50 I never would have guessed.
749 00:43:54 Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
750 00:43:57 I'm so sorry.
751 00:43:59 -Hey! -Yeah!
752 00:44:02 - Hey! - Oh boy!  Maddy!
753 00:44:05 -What a bundle of joy! -Hey!
754 00:44:08 Hi, sweetheart!
755 00:44:09 -Got it? Okay. -Good? Good? Come on now.
756 00:44:17 Anna, come on, let's get something cold to drink.
757 00:44:20 Okay.
758 00:44:45 Remember when I caught you guys messin' around in here?
759 00:44:48 Oh my goodness.
760 00:44:49 Yes, I do.
761 00:44:51 You chased me with Mike's hockey stick.
762 00:44:58 You thought you were gonna get lucky that night.
763 00:45:01 You got damn lucky, didn't you?
764 00:45:04 It's amazing what you can do when you're scared.
765 00:45:06 I've never been that fast.
766 00:45:07 The room looks different.
767 00:45:10 Oh, I brought a lot of things down from the attic,
768 00:45:13 from her childhood.
769 00:45:15 I like it. I like it a lot.
770 00:45:18 At first, I spent whole days in here.
771 00:45:22 Whole days.
772 00:45:24 Just lyin' on the bed,
773 00:45:26 smelling the pillows.
774 00:45:28 Cryin'. Pissed.
775 00:45:31 I'm down to one hour each day. That's all I allow myself now.
776 00:45:37 I'd like for you to let Maddy come and stay with us sometimes.
777 00:45:43 When she's bigger.
778 00:45:45 She could spend summers here.
779 00:45:47 Summers?
780 00:45:48 Matt, she needs family.
781 00:45:53 She'll need a woman in her life.
782 00:45:57 And I don't mean some woman you met in the club.
783 00:46:01 Or on Tinders.
784 00:46:03 Tinders?
785 00:46:08 I'm not on Tinder. And what are you--
786 00:46:10 How do you know about Tinder? Where are you gettin' this stuff?
787 00:46:23 You think maybe you can watch Maddy for me tonight?
788 00:46:25 Yeah! Yes!
789 00:46:27 So I can go meet up with some friends, go have a drink.
790 00:46:31 -Yeah, you do that. Yeah! -All right. Okay.
791 00:46:56 Thank you.
792 00:47:01 Mom?
793 00:47:03 Did Dad like having a baby?
794 00:47:05 Oh, he loved babies.
795 00:47:07 That's why he had so many of them with so many different women.
796 00:47:11 Yeah, but he married you.
797 00:47:13 Yes, lucky me.
798 00:47:15 I was lucky 'cause I had you.
799 00:47:20 I'm just hopin' I can be half as good a mom as you were with me.
800 00:47:25 You're a good mom.
801 00:47:28 Maddy, guess what?
802 00:47:31 See the baby?
803 00:47:37 She did so good, huh?
804 00:47:48 - Come in.
805 00:48:21 Wake up, Daddy! It's a school day!
806 00:48:23 -Wake up! -I'm up.
807 00:48:27 like you're sneaking up on it and grab it.
808 00:48:30 Over, under,
809 00:48:33 over.
810 00:48:36 Okay.
811 00:48:38 Okay, that's one. Just let me--
812 00:48:40 What is this?
813 00:48:48 I think it's a new hairstyle that can catch on if given a chance.
814 00:48:52 Just stay still.
815 00:48:53 We gotta go top. Let me--
816 00:48:57 Hold on, okay?
817 00:49:09 All the girls are wearing skirts,
818 00:49:11 but skirts make me feel like I forgot my pants.
819 00:49:15 But she said it's a rule.
820 00:49:17 Rules? We don't need no stinkin' rules.
821 00:49:22 -Maddy, do you like goin' to school here?
822 00:49:23 -Mommy wanted me to be here.
823 00:49:25 I like it.
824 00:49:27 That's all I needed to hear then.
825 00:49:29 All right, go ahead. I love you.
826 00:49:31 Love you too.
827 00:49:32 Two kisses. Forehead, forehead. I got you.
828 00:49:35 -Bye, Daddy. -Bye.
829 00:49:39 - Good morning.
830 00:49:40 - Good morning.
831 00:49:41 Mr. Logelin, we need to discuss the dress code.
832 00:49:44 Hey, you have a good day, okay?
833 00:49:46 There's a dress code here!
834 00:49:52 Maddy, it's on you. You wanna check or bet?
835 00:49:54 All in.
836 00:49:55 All in again?
837 00:49:57 -Wow! -All in again?
838 00:49:58 - I'm gonna go ahead and fold, chief.
839 00:50:00 - You gonna fold like a chump.
840 00:50:02 -She looks serious.
841 00:50:03 -I don't know if she's bluffin' or not.
842 00:50:05 -Seriously. -Let me see your face.
843 00:50:08 That's a poker face right there. That's a poker face.
844 00:50:11 How can you break that down? You can't.
845 00:50:12 I don't know what you got going on in that head.
846 00:50:14 I can see into the mind of Maddy. Hold on.
847 00:50:24 I got nothin', guys. I'm out. I fold.
848 00:50:26 I'm goin' all in. You kiddin' me?
849 00:50:29 Look at this. Bam. Queens.
850 00:50:31 -What do you have? -What do you got?
851 00:50:34 - Aces. - What? What?
852 00:50:36 -No! -Pocket rockets.
853 00:50:38 -Pocket aces. -Okay. That was a good hand.
854 00:50:40 - She got pocket rockets! - It's all yours. Take it.
855 00:50:43 -Scoop it. It's yours. -What? Okay, that's all you.
856 00:50:45 that's all you.
857 00:50:45 - This is all mine. - Okay. Go ahead.
858 00:50:47 You're not gonna eat all that today either.
859 00:50:49 Ship it!
860 00:50:50 There you go.
861 00:51:07 Oh yeah!
862 00:51:08 They're having so much fun. Makes you wish you had a kid to bring.
863 00:51:11 Oh, I do. Crazy one's mine. That's Maddy.
864 00:51:14 Hi, Daddy!
865 00:51:17 - Hey! - Cannonball!
866 00:51:21 Are you Matt?
867 00:51:23 I am Matt.
868 00:51:25 I think I know why Oscar and Rose insisted I come today.
869 00:51:29 -I think we're being set up.
870 00:51:30 -Oh, wow.
871 00:51:32 I told 'em to stop trying.
872 00:51:35 -Funny thing is I said the same thing. -Yeah?
873 00:51:37 We should mess with 'em. Throw your drink in my face, make it look real bad.
874 00:51:40 Or we could break up with them as friends.
875 00:51:43 You know what? I've been looking for new white people.
876 00:51:47 I have. I really have.
877 00:51:52 What do you do?
878 00:51:53 Uh, I'm an animator.
879 00:51:54 An animator? That's cool. That's different.
880 00:51:59 I work with Oscar.
881 00:52:02 -Hey. -That's my name.
882 00:52:03 Don't wear it out. Just kidding. You can say it as much as you want.
883 00:52:07 So, you two meeting at, uh, Oliver's birthday party.
884 00:52:11 Yeah.
885 00:52:12 -Pretty great. -What are the odds?
886 00:52:14 What are the odds, you know?
887 00:52:21 -It's not a setup though. You know? -Got it. Got it.
888 00:52:24 -Very smooth, by the way, Oscar. -Yeah.
889 00:52:26 -Thank you. -Yeah.
890 00:52:27 Great.
891 00:52:29 Thank you.
892 00:52:31 Hi, Rose.
893 00:52:32 Hi, Rose.
894 00:52:33 Unreal.
895 00:52:35 My name's Liz.
896 00:52:38 Stop playin'.
897 00:52:40 Um, I'm not playing. My name is-- Well, Lizzie is what my friends call me.
898 00:52:48 You're an animator.
899 00:52:50 -What have you animated?
900 00:52:51 -I work on a show called Lucky Jim.
901 00:52:53 Lucky Jim. I know what that is.
902 00:52:55 Maddy loves that show.
903 00:52:58 You let her watch Lucky Jim?
904 00:53:00 Yeah, it's a cartoon.
905 00:53:02 Have you ever watched it?
906 00:53:04 It's called Lucky Jim because he gets lucky.
907 00:53:08 -You talkin' about sex? -Uh-huh.
908 00:53:11 -I thought he was, like, a leprechaun.
909 00:53:13 -Yeah, he's a leprechaun.
910 00:53:14 A really lucky, really horny leprechaun.
911 00:53:21 Is there, like, a warning on it that kids shouldn't watch it?
912 00:53:23 There's definitely a warning.
913 00:53:29 You know where the pot of gold is?
914 00:53:31 Begorra, the pot of gold is right over there.
915 00:53:34 And now that rainbow's up and disappeared.
916 00:53:36 I think you're full of horse blarney.
917 00:53:38 I'd like to show you what I'm full of, me lassie, if you've no objection.
918 00:53:42 I've no objection to plucking the clover out of you.
919 00:53:46 I'm seeing stars.
920 00:53:47 You'll be seeing more than stars in a moment.
921 00:53:50 That's it.
922 00:53:52 -Oh, that's off. -Daddy, they were about to wrestle.
923 00:53:57 It's a little too violent for you to watch, honey.
924 00:54:00 -Wait, did you call her? -Zip it.
925 00:54:02 -What do you mean, "Zip it"? -Zip it. Don't be a bonehead.
926 00:54:05 -Why I gotta be a bonehead? -Don't be a bonehead.
927 00:54:07 -Maddy can handle it, right? -Stop. What'd I ask you to do?
928 00:54:09 Handle what?
929 00:54:10 -Jordan, what'd I say? -Look, I got this.
930 00:54:12 -Jordan, I don't-- -I got this.
931 00:54:13 -Jordan-- -That's what friends are for.
932 00:54:15 Sometimes two adults meet each other, right?
933 00:54:18 And they fall in love.
934 00:54:19 And then they both are nearsighted.
935 00:54:22 Have that in common and all these beautiful things.
936 00:54:25 They take long walks in the park together.
937 00:54:27 You know, you find that special someone.
938 00:54:30 But then they get real petty one day
939 00:54:33 and kick you in your back
940 00:54:35 'cause you snoring while you sleep.
941 00:54:37 -What? -You're sleeping on the floor. -You're all messed up. -What?
942 00:54:39 -Carpet burns on your arm.
943 00:54:41 -That's-- What are you-- That's enough!
944 00:54:42 -It's not enough, okay? -It is enough.
945 00:54:44 You don't know if you're gonna find a special someone.
946 00:54:46 You're not talking about nobody but yourself--
947 00:54:48 You know he's talking about himself, right?
948 00:54:50 I know. But if they liked each other,
949 00:54:53 and then they didn't like each other,
950 00:54:54 couldn't they like each other again?
951 00:54:57 And wouldn't that be fun?
952 00:55:00 -Yeah, Maddy. -Wow.
953 00:55:02 Give me a high five or something, a hug. Come here.
954 00:55:07 Gotta be to make sense of all that stuff you just said.
955 00:55:09 Don't be a hater. I wanna-- Look, you are so smart.
956 00:55:12 You definitely don't get that from your daddy.
957 00:55:16 How come you wear boys' pants?
958 00:55:18 Okay, stay together. No running.
959 00:55:20 Hey, Maddy, are you a boy?
960 00:55:22 Are you a girl?
961 00:55:23 Zip it, bonehead!
962 00:55:24 Madeline!
963 00:55:27 I really don't understand this.
964 00:55:28 The kid was teasin' her.
965 00:55:30 Maybe you should talk to that kid's parents.
966 00:55:32 I have.
967 00:55:33 But he was teasing her because she was the only girl wearing pants.
968 00:55:38 What if a boy wanted to come to school dressed in a skirt?
969 00:55:42 Then that's that boy's business. It's the 21st century.
970 00:55:45 Mr. Logelin, Madeline is in kindergarten.
971 00:55:48 She doesn't have a mother to model after.
972 00:55:49 I am well aware of what my daughter doesn't have.
973 00:55:55 You have to at least show her that wearing girls' clothing is an option.
974 00:56:04 Why are you guys so tough?
975 00:56:12 I'm not gonna say anything else because I don't wanna get struck by lightning.
976 00:56:15 Okay, here you go, Maddy.
977 00:56:17 What about these here?
978 00:56:19 No. I want these.
979 00:56:22 - You want those? - Yeah.
980 00:56:27 Okay, if that's what you want.
981 00:56:30 Are you going out?
982 00:56:31 Yes. Rose is coming over, and Daddy's gonna go out.
983 00:56:37 With Oscar?
984 00:56:39 No, not with Oscar.
985 00:56:41 With Jordan?
986 00:56:43 No, not with Jordan.
987 00:56:45 A lady?
988 00:56:47 Yes, it's a lady.
989 00:56:49 Does that bother you?
990 00:56:50 -Does it bother you?
991 00:56:51 -I asked first.
992 00:56:53 Is it Sister Kathleen from school?
993 00:56:56 No, it is not Sister Kathleen from school.
994 00:56:59 Then that's okay. Who is it?
995 00:57:01 It's a lady friend from the birthday party.
996 00:57:07 You know what?
997 00:57:09 I got a surprise for you.
998 00:57:11 See, I was gonna wait till you got older.
999 00:57:13 This was Mommy's jewelry box.
1000 00:57:15 I want you to pick something out of here that can be just for you.
1001 00:57:19 -Anything?
1002 00:57:20 -Anything you want.
1003 00:57:25 This one.
1004 00:57:32 I like this one.
1005 00:57:41 Such a good choice.
1006 00:57:45 Such a good choice.
1007 00:57:49 Hmm, let me put it on you.
1008 00:57:56 Is she in this? Mommy?
1009 00:57:59 Yeah, she's in there. She's in you. She's in me.
1010 00:58:06 She's in whoever she touched.
1011 00:58:10 And what did she say to that?
1012 00:58:12 Oh, she said that her mom is in her because of DNA.
1013 00:58:16 -What? -Yeah, that's-- I swear to God.
1014 00:58:18 What? Is she some kind of genius?
1015 00:58:20 You know what it is? Maddy just asks a lot of questions.
1016 00:58:23 - Mmm. - I took her to this mummy show.
1017 00:58:25 They were talking about DNA at the show,
1018 00:58:26 so I tried to explain to her what DNA was.
1019 00:58:33 What?
1020 00:58:35 Um, I guess I'm kind of surprised you're still single.
1021 00:58:38 All those hot single moms at the kiddie park.
1022 00:58:40 Stop it. Stop.
1023 00:58:41 There's nothing hot about single parents.
1024 00:58:44 We are overworked, sleep-deprived, covered in baby vomit.
1025 00:58:48 -That's hot. -That's hot?
1026 00:58:50 - It's hot. - All that is hot?
1027 00:58:52 -You're funny. You're very funny.
1028 00:58:53 -You've just been through a lot.
1029 00:58:56 You and Maddy.
1030 00:58:57 We have been through a lot.
1031 00:59:07 I get that, you know?
1032 00:59:09 I'm on my own, and I'm fine too. I like where I'm at.
1033 00:59:12 -Yeah? -Uh-huh.
1034 00:59:18 No. No, I did not.
1035 00:59:21 Actually, I had the complete opposite of that.
1036 00:59:24 I know what not to do because of my dad.
1037 00:59:30 I'm gonna kiss you now, okay?
1038 00:59:33 Okay.
1039 00:59:35 I think I'm prepared.
1040 00:59:38 Oh, do you prefer my false teeth in or out?
1041 00:59:41 Leave 'em in, just in case I mess up, so I got something to blame it on.
1042 00:59:45 Sure.
1043 01:00:03 No.
1044 01:00:05 But you can change it if you want to.
1045 01:00:08 Okay. You know, if you wanna call me anything like,
1046 01:00:12 "Your Highness,"
1047 01:00:13 or like, my mom was gonna name me Majesty.
1048 01:00:16 Anything along those lines is great.
1049 01:00:19 Okay. Noted.
1050 01:00:21 -Mm-hmm. -What about Hank?
1051 01:00:24 What about Hank?
1052 01:00:27 Why?
1053 01:00:28 -You said anything I want.
1054 01:00:29 -Okay? -Okay.
1055 01:00:32 -Okay. Let's test it out right now.
1056 01:00:33 -Is that a deal? Okay. We'll test it out.
1057 01:00:38 Oh my God.
1058 01:00:40 - Thanks for the good time, Hank.
1059 01:00:42 - Hank!
1060 01:00:43 - Hank! - Good night!
1061 01:00:44 No, all right, stop it. That's enough. Thank you.
1062 01:00:48 Good night.
1063 01:01:04 Hey.
1064 01:01:05 You're late.
1065 01:01:06 What do you mean, I'm late?
1066 01:01:07 You told Rose you'd be home at 11.
1067 01:01:09 Well, guess what? It is 11:13 right now.
1068 01:01:14 Yeah. Late.
1069 01:01:15 All right. That is not that late. Hey, Rose.
1070 01:01:18 Hey. I swear I put her to bed.
1071 01:01:20 -Did you? -Uh-huh.
1072 01:01:21 What are you gonna do? Are you gonna ground me because I'm late?
1073 01:01:23 Huh? Is that what you wanna do?
1074 01:01:25 Do you wanna ground your dad because he's late, huh?
1075 01:01:28 -Yes, yes. -There you go.
1076 01:01:30 -Good. -Are your shoes tied?
1077 01:01:31 -I don't think his shoes are tied. -Hey.
1078 01:01:32 -Hey, Maddy. -Where's Daddy?
1079 01:01:36 Yeah, so, your dad had to work late,
1080 01:01:40 but, uh, we wanted to come watch you play
1081 01:01:42 and then maybe get some ice cream afterwards.
1082 01:01:45 'Cause he's not doin' anything fun with anyone,
1083 01:01:48 and I am telling you the truth.
1084 01:02:07 I'm gonna walk you through how our software
1085 01:02:09 can help you redesign every aspect of your new mall.
1086 01:02:12 What you gotta see-- What are you--What's goin' on? Stop it.
1087 01:02:15 Sorry, it's Bring Your Kid to Work Day,
1088 01:02:17 so you can only imagine the--
1089 01:02:18 -No, it's not. -Yes, it is.
1090 01:02:20 -Let's go out.
1091 01:02:21 -No. Wait a second. Stop it, Maddy. Stop.
1092 01:02:26 - I've got your keys. - Put my keys down. I'm gonna throw them out the window.
1093 01:02:30 Wait, put my key--
1094 01:02:32 Give me the keys. Stop. What are you doing? What is--
1095 01:02:34 - What's your favorite movie?
1096 01:02:36 - His Girl Friday.
1097 01:02:38 Okay. That's a great movie.
1098 01:02:41 Bringing Up Baby.
1099 01:02:44 Let me think more recent. Let me think, like, not before the 1940s.
1100 01:02:48 Ask me mine.
1101 01:02:50 -What's your favorite movie?
1102 01:02:51 -I'm Gonna Git You Sucka.
1103 01:02:57 Dad! Dad! Dad!
1104 01:03:01 What is that?
1105 01:03:03 I'm serious. I thought there was something on the window.
1106 01:03:06 No, I don't fall for your tricks no more.
1107 01:03:08 What? I thought something was on the window. I'm not gonna trick you.
1108 01:03:10 Oh my gosh. There's a booger on your shirt.
1109 01:03:16 Take it off now! Take it off now!
1110 01:03:21 Take it off now!
1111 01:03:25 Um, before we eat, I gotta tell you somethin'. -I gotta tell you somethin' important.
1112 01:03:29 -Okay. So, Saturday night I gotta go out,
1113 01:03:32 but Jennifer's mom said you can stay the night.
1114 01:03:36 Why can't I come with you?
1115 01:03:38 One reason why you can't come with me is I gotta do a bunch of grown-up stuff.
1116 01:03:42 -All right? -Mmm. Yeah.
1117 01:03:43 -Yeah? -Yeah.
1118 01:03:44 Okay, baby, it's time to go to bed.
1119 01:03:47 Are you gonna sleep in those?
1120 01:03:49 You should take them off. Flip, flip.
1121 01:03:52 Okay, hop in.
1122 01:03:59 Aw, okay. Good night, baby.
1123 01:04:04 Good night, sweetie. Mommy loves you.
1124 01:04:11 Good night, Maddy.
1125 01:04:18 You wanna go back to my place?
1126 01:04:21 -For what? You wanna play some poker?
1127 01:04:23 -I don't know how to play poker.
1128 01:04:25 But I was thinking something even more fun than that.
1129 01:04:31 Is it Twister?
1130 01:04:33 It's a form of Twister.
1131 01:04:34 Okay, okay.
1132 01:04:37 All right, so now that I have this information, I wanna be honest.
1133 01:04:40 Okay.
1134 01:04:47 -That I'm keeping Maddy-- -First.
1135 01:04:55 I really do. I get it.
1136 01:04:56 Okay.
1137 01:04:58 That's part of what I like about you.
1138 01:05:01 Well,
1139 01:05:03 then maybe I should teach you how to play poker.
1140 01:05:14 Wow! This is amazing!
1141 01:05:18 I know, right? It's gonna be so much fun.
1142 01:05:34 Hey, y'all gotta stop it!
1143 01:05:36 That's enough.
1144 01:05:37 Hey, slow it do--
1145 01:05:42 It's way too loud in here!
1146 01:05:45 -You okay, Maddy? -Yes.
1147 01:05:48 Yeah?
1148 01:05:50 Yeah?
1149 01:05:51 - Hey, this is cool. - Hey! Y'all gotta turn this--
1150 01:05:54 It's too loud!
1151 01:05:57 Come on, stay close.
1152 01:06:00 Dad! You hit the clown!
1153 01:06:03 Oh my God!
1154 01:06:07 Yeah, yeah.
1155 01:06:08 - Thank you. - Thank you.
1156 01:06:10 Come on, give me your hand. Give me your hand, honey.
1157 01:06:12 What an amazing day, huh?
1158 01:06:15 -Mm-hmm. -It's, like, the best day ever.
1159 01:06:16 I feel like nothing can mess up a day like this.
1160 01:06:19 -It was so perfect. -Yeah, it was very fun.
1161 01:06:27 I wanna introduce you to somebody that I've been seeing.
1162 01:06:49 - Daddy? - Yeah.
1163 01:06:51 Can I have a lollipop?
1164 01:06:56 Some more candy, okay?
1165 01:06:57 Maybe take one home, and we finish this talk?
1166 01:07:00 Okay, but I don't wanna meet anyone.
1167 01:07:12 - Come here, come here, come here. - What?
1168 01:07:14 -Hey. -Hey.
1169 01:07:15 - How are you? - Good.
1170 01:07:20 Hey! Well, you can call me "Swan" or "Dude" or "Butthead"!
1171 01:07:28 Hey, so you guys wanna go to the Tea Party thingy? -You wanna do that?
1172 01:07:33 -Mmm. -No?
1173 01:07:34 After 15 minutes, I heard they throw the tea in the water, which could be cool.
1174 01:07:38 -Mmm. -Yeah. I'm super ambivalent too.
1175 01:07:41 I do hear there's a cool spiders exhibit in this kids' museum.
1176 01:07:45 Wanna do that?
1177 01:07:46 - I like tarantulas, but we already went. - Yeah.
1178 01:07:49 Okay, how about we wing it?
1179 01:07:51 - Yeah? - Okay.
1180 01:07:52 - Let's wing it, Swan. - Let's wing it!
1181 01:07:54 This is nice. You guys are--
1182 01:07:56 -Right? This is cool.
1183 01:07:57 Maybe it's too soon. -Look at that over there!
1184 01:08:13 Hold on. Ah. -Yes! -Whoa! Whoa!
1185 01:08:16 When the boat comes, hit 'em with a wave.
1186 01:08:18 You ready? Hit 'em with a wave. There you go.
1187 01:08:20 See that?
1188 01:08:22 See how cool that is? Yeah.
1189 01:08:24 I used to play with these ducks when I was little!
1190 01:08:28 Hi, Billy.
1191 01:08:29 Hi, Bella.
1192 01:08:43 Let me do a solo.
1193 01:08:48 Solo, yes!
1194 01:08:53 You wanna draw the castle?
1195 01:08:54 - Yeah. - What color?
1196 01:08:57 Hmm. Purple and black.
1197 01:08:59 - Ooh. - And blue.
1198 01:09:01 That'll be great.
1199 01:09:02 And then maybe in the middle,
1200 01:09:04 you could, like, add some fire or something.
1201 01:09:07 - Totes. - You know?
1202 01:09:11 - Hey. - Hey, Swan.
1203 01:09:17 Maddy, I don't know if we can keep this goin'.
1204 01:09:19 Why not?
1205 01:09:23 Our house isn't the house for this.
1206 01:09:28 are the walls you wanna write on because all her walls are white.
1207 01:09:31 Are you visiting your grandma soon?
1208 01:09:33 - Yeah. It's her birthday.
1209 01:09:35 - Ooh, nice.
1210 01:09:37 Is Swan still here?
1211 01:09:38 Yes. She's actually in the hallway.
1212 01:09:40 -Is she gonna stay here?
1213 01:09:42 -Not tonight.
1214 01:09:43 She wanted to come in and tell you good night though, okay?
1215 01:09:46 Yeah?
1216 01:09:47 Swan?
1217 01:09:50 Hey, Maddy.
1218 01:09:52 So I had a blast today. Did you have fun?
1219 01:09:54 -Yeah. -Good.
1220 01:09:55 Is she gonna sleep in your bed when she does sleep here?
1221 01:10:00 Yuck. Yuck.
1222 01:10:05 Yeah.
1223 01:10:06 Yuck to death.
1224 01:10:07 She'll sleep in the bathtub.
1225 01:10:10 You can borrow a pillow if you want.
1226 01:10:11 That is so nice. That'll make it more comfortable.
1227 01:10:14 -So generous. -Yeah.
1228 01:10:16 You should take notes.
1229 01:10:18 -'Night, Maddy.
1230 01:10:19 -Good night. Get some rest.
1231 01:10:22 You forgot the two kisses.
1232 01:10:28 I almost did.
1233 01:10:34 I love you.
1234 01:10:35 Get some sleep.
1235 01:10:47 -You okay?
1236 01:10:48 -Um, no, I just forgot somethin'.
1237 01:10:51 I'm a little upset at myself.
1238 01:10:54 Um, thank you. You were great with her today.
1239 01:10:57 Please.
1240 01:10:58 It was easy. Maddy is fantastic.
1241 01:11:04 Maybe you could come over to my place in the morning after dropping Maddy off?
1242 01:11:09 You might get a little lucky if you bring me a latte.
1243 01:11:13 Okay.
1244 01:11:18 -Mr. Logelin. -I gotta get out of here.
1245 01:11:19 It's so late. I'm sorry.
1246 01:11:38 Here we have a rule that all girl students wear skirts.
1247 01:11:42 Rules? We don't need no stinkin' rules.
1248 01:11:44 That's what my dad says.
1249 01:11:46 Okay. Well, your daddy signed a paper
1250 01:11:49 when you were first accepted at this school,
1251 01:11:51 and he agreed to follow the rules.
1252 01:11:55 Sister Kathleen would like you to follow the rules
1253 01:11:57 and wear this skirt starting today.
1254 01:12:19 Are those boys' underwear?
1255 01:12:21 Maddy wears boys' underwear. Everyone, look.
1256 01:12:23 -Maddy wears boys' underwear. -Look, boys' underwear!
1257 01:12:25 - Boys' underwear! 
1258 01:12:27 Boys' underwear! - Zip it, Darren!
1259 01:12:29 -You zip it. -I'm warning you, Darren.
1260 01:12:31 -Boys' underwear! -Boys' underwear!
1261 01:12:33 Cannonball!
1262 01:12:43 I want my daddy!
1263 01:13:00 Where's Daddy?
1264 01:13:01 We're still trying to reach him.
1265 01:13:20 Maddy Logelin?
1266 01:13:22 Thank you.
1267 01:13:23 Maddy? Maddy?
1268 01:13:25 - Daddy! - Maddy.
1269 01:13:27 Hey. Oh my God, Maddy.
1270 01:13:30 Hey. Hey, babe.
1271 01:13:33 Oh, let me see. Let me see.
1272 01:13:34 -Mr. Logelin, I-- -Please, please.
1273 01:13:37 How you doin', huh?
1274 01:13:39 I'm sorry, Daddy.
1275 01:13:40 What?
1276 01:13:41 You're sorry? No.
1277 01:13:46 Okay, come on. We're leavin'.
1278 01:13:48 -Sir, sir, sir, wait.
1279 01:13:50 -No! - Wait, sir, she needs stitches.
1280 01:13:51 - No! Listen to me.
1281 01:13:54 We're not doin' anything here because you don't know how to do nothin' right.
1282 01:13:57 I've been here. No, thank you. Come on.
1283 01:13:59 I know she's gonna have a substantial scar if she doesn't get stitches.
1284 01:14:13 Look at me.
1285 01:14:16 You're so strong.
1286 01:14:18 Such a strong little girl. Okay?
1287 01:14:22 I'm proud.
1288 01:14:23 Guess who else is proud?
1289 01:14:26 Mommy. Mommy would be proud right now.
1290 01:14:29 We're gonna go get some stitches, okay?
1291 01:14:32 Squeeze my hand, that's all.
1292 01:14:34 There you go.
1293 01:14:39 Mm-hmm-hmm. Good job, Maddy.
1294 01:14:43 You're doin' good.
1295 01:14:47 -Hey. -Hey.
1296 01:14:49 I've been calling. Is she all right?
1297 01:14:55 Sorry I didn't pick up.
1298 01:14:56 I'm just, uh, a little upset because I feel like I should've been there sooner.
1299 01:15:00 You can't blame yourself. It was just an accident.
1300 01:15:02 I actually can.
1301 01:15:04 I can blame myself because I wasn't there.
1302 01:15:07 Anything could've happened to her. She could've lost her eye.
1303 01:15:10 She didn't.
1304 01:15:11 - She could have. - But she didn't.
1305 01:15:18 can I see her? I brought her this guy.
1306 01:15:22 It's very sweet.
1307 01:15:24 I think she's sleeping though.
1308 01:15:28 I just think that, right now, she's not ready.
1309 01:15:34 -Ready for what?
1310 01:15:35 -For this. She's not ready for
1311 01:15:38 this, this.
1312 01:15:39 She's not ready, or you're not ready?
1313 01:15:41 Look, Swan, the hospital that I was at today,
1314 01:15:46 it's the same hospital that Liz died in.
1315 01:15:49 I mean, thank God, thank God today I got there in time to hold her hand.
1316 01:15:55 Because with Liz, it was different. With Liz,
1317 01:15:58 I didn't get to hold her hand. I got shoved out the room.
1318 01:16:02 I got shoved out the room, and when I came back, she was gone.
1319 01:16:17 Matt,
1320 01:16:19 I am so sorry that happened to you.
1321 01:16:21 It didn't happen to me.
1322 01:16:24 That's the problem.
1323 01:16:26 It did not happen to me.
1324 01:16:30 - Okay. - So don't be sorry. Don't be sorry for me.
1325 01:16:38 Would you give Maddy my love please?
1326 01:16:53 What's going on? What's wrong?
1327 01:16:55 I can't find Mommy's necklace.
1328 01:16:57 You can't find it? Did you misplace it?
1329 01:17:00 I don't remember.
1330 01:17:02 What do you mean, you don't remember?
1331 01:17:04 Do you think it came off on the playground?
1332 01:17:06 Maybe.
1333 01:17:07 Okay, all right. Hey, hey, hey.
1334 01:17:10 It will come up. All right?
1335 01:17:13 -I need you to go to Croatia.
1336 01:17:15 -Croatia?
1337 01:17:16 Yeah, just for a month.
1338 01:17:17 Just set up the office there. That's all.
1339 01:17:19 Why don't you send Oscar?
1340 01:17:20 His wife's Croatian. He speaks Croatian.
1341 01:17:23 -He does? -Yes.
1342 01:17:24 Yeah, I don't care. I'm gonna send you. I trust you.
1343 01:17:26 Howard, that's tough, man.
1344 01:17:29 I don't know if I can leave Maddy for over a month. I can't do that.
1345 01:17:32 It's an opportunity.
1346 01:17:33 College tuition's not gettin' any cheaper.
1347 01:17:35 College tuition? I'm trying to get through the week.
1348 01:17:37 Yeah, well, hey, that's how it happens. Think about it.
1349 01:17:47 Yeah, I mean, I should be traveling for work right now.
1350 01:17:52 And this is just the beginnin' travel-wise.
1351 01:17:55 Welcome to not knowing the right thing to do.
1352 01:17:58 That's a dad specialty.
1353 01:18:06 Is Swan coming to Minnesota?
1354 01:18:11 I don't think we're gonna be seeing much of Swan anymore.
1355 01:18:14 Why not?
1356 01:18:14 Because Swan and I broke up.
1357 01:18:17 What? You didn't talk to me about that!
1358 01:18:20 I did not talk to you about it because I don't need your permission.
1359 01:18:22 Call her and say you're still going out.
1360 01:18:24 No. It doesn't work like that.
1361 01:18:26 So make it work.
1362 01:18:27 Stop. You're pushin' it. I don't even know why you're actin' like you care.
1363 01:18:30 You didn't even wanna meet her.
1364 01:18:31 Yeah, but now I know her. And we need more people.
1365 01:18:34 -Other people have more people.
1366 01:18:36 -What are you talking about, Maddy?
1367 01:18:37 It's always just us.
1368 01:18:38 Oh, I'm sorry for being your dad.
1369 01:18:40 I'm sorry for bein' around. Is that what you want?
1370 01:18:43 It's not even just us all the time.
1371 01:18:44 You got Jordan. You got Oscar. You got Poker Sundays.
1372 01:18:48 Swan's not at Poker Sunday.
1373 01:18:50 Because Swan does not play poker.
1374 01:18:52 I don't care!
1375 01:18:53 I like her, and I like my grandmas and Grandpa Mike. And we never see them!
1376 01:18:57 Okay, what are you talkin' about? Where are we goin'?
1377 01:18:59 How come, when something good happens, it always gets taken away?
1378 01:19:05 I don't have an answer for that.
1379 01:19:07 And I don't have an answer for anything else you wanna ask me.
1380 01:19:10 Don't ask me no more questions.
1381 01:19:11 For the rest of the day, for the whole flight,
1382 01:19:13 I'm not answerin' nothin' else that you ask me.
1383 01:19:15 Do you hear me? Question time is over.
1384 01:19:17 I give you an inch, you take a mile.
1385 01:19:19 Carry your bag.
1386 01:19:20 -Uh! -What? Who you uh-ing? Who--
1387 01:19:23 Hey, stop stompin', I'll tell you that much.
1388 01:19:27 We are going to have so much fun.
1389 01:19:29 Your cousins are waiting for you, Maddy.
1390 01:19:32 Yeah, wait till you see your room, girl. It is fabulous.
1391 01:19:37 Yeah, come on in.
1392 01:19:38 That's your art on the wall there.
1393 01:19:42 Cool.
1394 01:19:44 I like to unpack,
1395 01:19:46 because I don't like things to be all in a jumble in my luggage,
1396 01:19:50 and I can't find anything.
1397 01:19:54 I lost Mommy's necklace.
1398 01:19:55 Yeah. Your daddy told me.
1399 01:19:59 Why don't I buy you another necklace?
1400 01:20:01 It won't be the one Daddy bought Mommy.
1401 01:20:04 That's true. That's true.
1402 01:20:08 What was she like?
1403 01:20:13 Your mom was the best!
1404 01:20:18 'Cause she was strong and smart.
1405 01:20:26 Hey,
1406 01:20:27 should we take a little Mommy tour around the neighborhood?
1407 01:20:29 -Yeah. -Just the two of us. Come on.
1408 01:20:31 That's where your mommy's best friend, Anastacia, lived.
1409 01:20:35 Stacy. There's a creek behind their house,
1410 01:20:37 and they used to go off in there, diggin' up tadpoles.
1411 01:20:42 And they would bring all of that smelly mess and mud into my kitchen.
1412 01:20:47 And then, every Saturday morning,
1413 01:20:49 this is where your mom would come and play soccer!
1414 01:21:19 Hey, um, is Liz's room permanently set up for Maddy now?
1415 01:21:23 Yes, yes.
1416 01:21:25 -Is that problematic?
1417 01:21:27 -I think it's confusin'.
1418 01:21:28 With all she's been through, the accident and everything else.
1419 01:21:31 Well, it wasn't exactly an accident.
1420 01:21:34 What is that supposed to mean?
1421 01:21:35 If you had followed the rules the school asked you to follow
1422 01:21:38 instead of encouragin' her to act out.
1423 01:21:41 You don't think I know that?
1424 01:21:43 You don't think I blame myself for what happened?
1425 01:21:45 You don't really expect me to argue that, do you?
1426 01:21:49 - Let it go. - Why do I try, man?
1427 01:21:51 -We are all trying. -No, we're not.
1428 01:21:53 -We have nothing in common outside of Liz. -We have--
1429 01:21:56 -Nothing in common! -We have Maddy.
1430 01:21:58 Mike, I apologize to you. I'm not stayin' here. I'm not.
1431 01:22:02 - I'm not dealin' with you. - Oh, please.
1432 01:22:07 I think you both sorta have a thing or two in common.
1433 01:22:13 What are you doing?
1434 01:22:15 We're leavin'. We're goin' over to Grandma Anna's.
1435 01:22:18 I don't wanna leave! I wanna stay here!
1436 01:22:20 Hey, hey. Don't start with me, Maddy.
1437 01:22:22 All right? It's just for a little bit.
1438 01:22:24 You never listen to me.
1439 01:22:26 Maddy. This was Mommy's room,
1440 01:22:28 and I wanna stay here.
1441 01:22:29 I wanna live here with Grammy and Granddad.
1442 01:22:31 Why can't we both stay here?
1443 01:22:33 I don't wanna go back.
1444 01:22:36 I don't wanna go to St. Joseph,
1445 01:22:38 even if Mommy wanted me to wear a uniform.
1446 01:22:53 Mommy would have wanted you to be happy.
1447 01:22:59 That's what Mommy would have wanted. Come here.
1448 01:23:31 How's Maddy?
1449 01:23:33 Happy.
1450 01:23:36 She seems really happy over there.
1451 01:23:41 -You know what I was thinkin' about? -Hmm?
1452 01:23:42 That time when I asked Dad could I go live with him
1453 01:23:45 'cause you wouldn't let me do what I wanted to.
1454 01:23:47 I certainly remember.
1455 01:23:48 He brought you right back here, all across town.
1456 01:23:54 He knew.
1457 01:23:56 It's probably the least selfish thing he ever did.
1458 01:24:02 ♪ Happy birthday, dear Marion♪
1459 01:24:08 ♪ Happy birthday to you♪
1460 01:24:15 You count.
1461 01:24:17 One, two, three.
1462 01:24:25 Okay, everybody, who wants cake?
1463 01:24:40 when you were a baby
1464 01:24:50 And right now, I can't. I can't move here.
1465 01:25:03 You know, Grandma Marion and Grandpa Mike,
1466 01:25:08 they brought up Mommy.
1467 01:25:11 And Mommy was the best.
1468 01:25:12 She was just like you.
1469 01:25:22 You and your mom are the best thing that ever happened to me.
1470 01:25:40 for taking care of me.
1471 01:25:46 I want you to know that I tried,
1472 01:25:56 I just wanna do what your mom would have wanted me to do.
1473 01:26:03 Two kisses.
1474 01:26:06 - One for Mommy. - One for me.
1475 01:26:19 Hey.
1476 01:26:23 This is gonna be fun.
1477 01:26:26 It's gonna be so much fun, you know.
1478 01:26:32 You'll be back?
1479 01:26:33 Yeah, yes. Of course, I'll be back.
1480 01:26:36 You know, Dad's just gotta go, gotta go to work and, you know,
1481 01:26:50 All right? It'll be great.
1482 01:26:54 Okay?
1483 01:26:56 All right, give me a hug.
1484 01:27:16 - I love you.
1485 01:27:17 - I love you too.
1486 01:28:12 Look, Matt,
1487 01:28:14 um, now, I know you don't really wanna hear this,
1488 01:28:18 but, like, honestly, none of us thought
1489 01:28:21 you would've did the job you did.
1490 01:28:24 We thought you didn't have a chance of taking care of this little girl by yourself.
1491 01:28:28 Honestly, you did a way better job than any of us thought you would do, man.
1492 01:28:33 You should be proud of yourself, man. You did that.
1493 01:28:35 I mean, she ain't die, right?
1494 01:28:38 - I mean, I fed her. - Yeah.
1495 01:28:42 Put Pampers on her, gave her some clothes.
1496 01:28:48 Yeah. Yeah, that's a good job.
1497 01:28:50 I mean, what I did, you gotta say, it was probably the bare minimum of parenting.
1498 01:28:55 That should be enough, right?
1499 01:28:57 I think you're being hard on yourself. - I didn't mean it like--
1500 01:29:00 -No, I'm not being hard on myself.
1501 01:29:03 Nobody else thought that I could raise my child.
1502 01:29:05 So, why did I?
1503 01:29:07 What am I doin'?
1504 01:29:10 What am I doin'? What decision am I making,
1505 01:29:13 and who's the decision best for? 'Cause I don't know.
1506 01:29:16 Cheers.
1507 01:29:24 Matt, come on in.
1508 01:29:26 Close the door. Grab a chair.
1509 01:29:29 Yes, sir.
1510 01:29:33 Bad news?
1511 01:29:35 I'm leavin'.
1512 01:29:38 I'm leaving the office. I'm, uh, moving up that chain.
1513 01:29:41 And I've recommended you to take over my job.
1514 01:29:49 You can travel more for work. I think you're ready.
1515 01:29:58 a new salary.
1516 01:30:02 It says, "Buy dog food."
1517 01:30:04 Turn it over.
1518 01:30:09 Wow.
1519 01:30:11 -There's your college tuition.
1520 01:30:14 You know what? You deserve it.
1521 01:30:16 Thank you.
1522 01:30:17 You deserve it.
1523 01:30:21 I don't know why, I've always felt sorta like a father figure to you.
1524 01:30:32 Neighbor? Maybe I felt like a neighbor.
1525 01:30:36 And I don't wanna get all sappy. I'm not gonna get all sappy.
1526 01:30:39 You don't have to really get into--
1527 01:30:46 I'm very glad I didn't fire you.
1528 01:30:52 I'm glad too.
1529 01:30:55 You're a good man.
1530 01:30:57 Now go kick some ass in Croatia.
1531 01:30:59 - And next month, London. - Okay.
1532 01:31:04 I'm gonna see that and raise it.
1533 01:31:07 What is that?
1534 01:31:09 - Don't waste our time. Just fold. - Don't fold, J.
1535 01:31:12 Am I the only one that feel like this?
1536 01:31:14 Does it feel weird that Maddy's not here?
1537 01:31:17 - Yeah, yeah, it does. - Huh?
1538 01:31:22 Cookies. I mean, the chips, you know, that's cool too.
1539 01:31:24 You know, cash game,
1540 01:31:28 You want cookies? Is that what you want?
1541 01:31:29 -We'll take some cookies. -Cookies would be great.
1542 01:31:31 Tell you what, I'mma bring the cookie out here.
1543 01:31:33 Y'all better eat every damn cookie.
1544 01:31:35 -Okay. -You hear me?
1545 01:31:36 -Yes. -You better eat every damn cookie.
1546 01:31:38 Or else it's gonna be a problem out here.
1547 01:31:41 Let it be a cookie left after I bring these cookies out.
1548 01:31:44 I mean, all he had to do is say he miss her too, you know.
1549 01:33:42 The snacks are okay.
1550 01:33:43 Not super international, but they do have Brazil nuts.
1551 01:33:46 Dude, thanks so much for taking me on this trip. Seriously.
1552 01:33:50 So psyched to be wingman.
1553 01:33:52 Yeah, well, my Croatian's a little rusty, man.
1554 01:33:55 -Teach me some stuff.
1555 01:33:56 -Yeah, for sure. Okay.
1556 01:33:59 Uh, repeat after me.
1557 01:34:03 -What does that mean? -It means, "Be quiet."
1558 01:34:06 -"Be quiet"?
1559 01:34:11 Well, I mean, you know, have you met me?
1560 01:34:15 -Yeah. My wife says that all the time. You know, "Začepi."
1561 01:34:19 You know?
1562 01:34:20 Look. Look at the duck. Look at the ducky.
1563 01:34:22 Look at the ducky.
1564 01:34:25 Look at the duck.
1565 01:34:28 Look at the ducks.
1566 01:34:31 Oh, yeah.
1567 01:34:33 You like that duck?
1568 01:34:35 Huh?
1569 01:34:37 You like that duck?
1570 01:34:39 No? Come on. Let's see the next one.
1571 01:34:43 Ooh, ooh. What about this duck? You like that duck?
1572 01:34:47 No? All right.
1573 01:34:48 This one was my favorite.
1574 01:34:50 -She says that one was her favorite. -Because it always looks at the sun.
1575 01:34:55 Okay. I love you, Dad.
1576 01:34:58 I'll call you when I get back to the dorm.
1577 01:35:01 No, I'm not nervous.
1578 01:35:03 Yeah.
1579 01:35:04 Yeah. I can do anything.
1580 01:35:10 - Bro. Look. - What?
1581 01:35:12 Oh my goodness.
1582 01:35:14 Maddy. Hey. Hey.
1583 01:35:17 Come here. You can do it, Maddy.
1584 01:35:20 Jordan! Jordan!
1585 01:35:22 Come on, Maddy!
1586 01:35:24 - Come on, Maddy! - Come on.
1587 01:35:27 Jordan, do you see this? - Are you watching? - I'm watching this.
1588 01:35:30 Oh my gosh.
1589 01:35:32 Hey! Jordan!
1590 01:35:36 Jordan! She walkin'!
1591 01:35:40 Somebody's cuttin' onions or something close to us. I don't know.
1592 01:35:46 Ready for your first day?
1593 01:35:48 This is gonna be kinda tough because she's never been around anybody but me.
1594 01:35:51 So there's probably gonna be separation issues. But you're a big girl.
1595 01:35:54 - Give daddy two kisses. - One for me, one for Mommy. Okay?
1596 01:36:03 Maddy. Maddy.
1597 01:36:07 I'll just hang out to watch a little bit.
1598 01:36:09 -Sure. No problem. -Okay?
1599 01:36:12 We should probably head to the gate.
1600 01:36:14 Oh, do you want to, um, talk or sleep, you know, on the flight?
1601 01:36:18 I tend to do both, actually. Talk in my sleep.
1602 01:36:21 Um, so if I do, just, you know, kind of nudge me awake,
1603 01:36:24 or you can probably even talk to me, actually.
1604 01:36:26 I'm pretty interesting when I'm sleep-talking.
1605 01:36:28 I believe in you.
1606 01:36:31 Thanks, man. I mean, that's really sweet.
1607 01:36:36 -Matt?
1608 01:36:37 -I really believe in you.
1609 01:36:39 Uh, the gate's actually that way.
1610 01:36:41 Matt?
1611 01:36:44 Got it.
1612 01:37:01 Hey.
1613 01:37:03 Hey.
1614 01:37:09 Daddy! Whoo!
1615 01:37:13 -I didn't know you were coming today!
1616 01:37:16 -Oh! I surprised you!
1617 01:37:18 -Oh! Guess what? -What?
1618 01:37:20 Look what I found.
1619 01:37:21 - You found it! - Yes, I did.
1620 01:37:23 I found it and said,
1621 01:37:24 "I gotta get on a plane and fly all the way here to give it to you myself in person." Come here.
1622 01:37:30 Let me see.
1623 01:37:33 So let's go home.
1624 01:37:37 Don't cry.
1625 01:37:37 I'm not gonna cry.
1626 01:37:39 Wherever you are, I wanna go there.
1627 01:37:43 Wherever you are, I wanna go there too.
1628 01:37:46 Give me a hug.
1629 01:37:55 I'll see you back here at Christmastime, okay? Okay.
1630 01:37:58 Come on, Maddy. Come on.
1631 01:38:00 Right here. There you go.
1632 01:38:04 I just wanna say thank you, Marion.
1633 01:38:14 I don't understand anything anymore.
1634 01:38:24 You know, she said you were the one
1635 01:38:27 when you showed up with those little grocery store flowers.
1636 01:38:32 You had 'em gripped so tight, you crushed the stems.
1637 01:38:34 I did. I did.
1638 01:38:40 I remember that day like it was yesterday.
1639 01:38:44 It was yesterday.
1640 01:39:00 Take care of her.
1641 01:39:05 Grammy loves you.
1642 01:39:06 And Grandpa loves you too. Give me a hug.
1643 01:39:10 Okay, put you down, huh? All right.
1644 01:39:12 Take care of your papa. Travel safe.
1645 01:39:15 -See you later, Mike. -Mm-hmm.
1646 01:39:19 -Dad? -Hmm?
1647 01:39:20 Are there the schools near us where you don't wear a uniform?
1648 01:39:25 Uh, yes, there are, but I'm thinking about sending you straight to college.
1649 01:39:28 So, we won't have to worry about that, okay?
1650 01:40:07 Hey.
1651 01:40:08 Hey.
1652 01:40:12 We were in the neighborhood, so we figured we'd stop by.
1653 01:40:14 No, we weren't.
1654 01:40:15 -We were in the neighborhood. -No, we weren't.
1655 01:40:18 We weren't.
1656 01:40:24 that say, "Sorry for being an idiot."
1657 01:40:28 I wanted to come and bring the flowers by here and give them to you.
1658 01:40:32 I didn't want you not to be here then leave 'em on the step.
1659 01:40:34 Then somebody come by, they steal the flowers,
1660 01:40:36 and you never get the flowers. You know--?
1661 01:40:38 You know, there are a lot of flower thieves in this building.
1662 01:40:42 -I didn't wanna say nothin', but yeah.
1663 01:40:44 -That's really astute.
1664 01:40:46 Maddy?
1665 01:40:48 It's so good to see you. How you been?
1666 01:40:50 -I have a really loose tooth. Look. -Ew.
1667 01:40:54 Hey, tooth fairy will visit.
1668 01:41:02 So, I'll take those.
1669 01:41:06 I'm sorry.
1670 01:41:09 Can you forgive me?
1671 01:41:17 Okay.
1672 01:41:18 All right.
1673 01:41:19 I have a very serious question to ask you.
1674 01:41:23 What are your favorite flavors of ice cream?
1675 01:41:28 Strawberry.
1676 01:41:29 I like strawberry.
1677 01:41:31 Vanilla.
1678 01:41:33 Coffee.
1679 01:41:34 Hold up. Coffee?
1680 01:41:36 Seriously? You actually like coffee ice cream?
1681 01:41:42 You don't like actual coffee, do you?
1682 01:41:45 No, that's gross.
1683 01:41:46 Okay. Good. Yes, that's gross.
1684 01:41:48 If he is giving you coffee, will you text me?
1685 01:41:54 Deal.
1686 01:41:55 Baby. Hmm.
1687 01:41:59 All right.
1688 01:42:01 Have we left him waiting long enough?
1689 01:42:07 I guess.
1690 01:42:08 Girl, I guess too.
1691 01:42:10 Come on.
1692 01:42:13 Maddy and I are gonna go get some ice cream.
1693 01:42:17 You wanna third wheel?
1694 01:42:21 I mean, yes.
1695 01:42:24 Yes, I would.
1696 01:42:32 -Oh. -Is that your ice cream dance?
1697 01:42:33 ♪ Ice cream, ice cream, ice cream♪
1698 01:42:35 ♪ Ice cream, ice cream, ice cream♪
1699 01:42:37 ♪ Well, I got my ice cream♪
1700 01:42:39 ♪ Hey, I got my ice cream ♪
1701 01:42:41 ♪ Hey, I got my ice cream ♪
1702 01:42:44 ♪ I got my ice cream ♪
1703 01:42:46 ♪You gonna spill it ♪
1704 01:42:47 ♪ And I don't have no more money
1705 01:42:48 Don't spill it ♪
1706 01:42:49 ♪ I don't have no more money
1707 01:42:50 Don't spill it ♪
1708 01:42:51 ♪ And I don't have no more money Don't spill it♪
1709 01:42:54 ♪ Don't spill it Hey, hey♪
1710 01:42:56 ♪ Don't spill it Hey, hey♪
1711 01:42:58 ♪ Don't spill it Don't spill it ♪
1712 01:43:13 -Are you sure you're okay with this?
1713 01:43:15 -I'm okay. I'm not afraid.
1714 01:43:17 All right.
1715 01:43:18 It's only for the rest of the year, okay?
1716 01:43:20 So if you don't like it, then we gonna find somethin' else.
1717 01:43:23 But if you're not afraid, then guess what?
1718 01:43:25 I'm not either.
1719 01:43:29 Hello, Mr. Logelin.
1720 01:43:30 Welcome back, Maddy.
1721 01:43:32 Interesting choice of outfit today, sir.
1722 01:43:34 I'm wearing my uniform, and Maddy is wearing pants.
1723 01:43:38 You look very nice today, Maddy.
1724 01:43:40 And we're changing our dress code.
1725 01:43:42 - Thank you.
1726 01:43:43 - Go to school.
1727 01:43:51 Hey, Maddy.
1728 01:43:53 I love you this much.
1729 01:43:55 Hey, hey.
1730 01:44:01 I don't know how to do the dance.
1731 01:44:04 Uh. Good day.